Life Without You
by bellarketrashhh
Summary: A season 5 Bellarke reunion.
1. Chapter 1

**Earth Shattering**

 **Clarke:**

Could this be them? But how? My blood went cold and chills went down my spine. A hundred different scenarios crossed my mind. Maybe they survived. Maybe they found a different way to get to Earth. Maybe they were hurt. Maybe these people had nothing to do with them.

I took my rifle looking through the scope trying to find answers to my questions. "Eligius Corporation" the name sounded familiar, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It wasn't a part of the Ark, I knew all the parts of the Ark.

"Eligius Corporation" I repeated to myself, my mind was racing. The ship also read "Gagarin Prisoner Transport." I could feel all the blood rush to my face as the ship began to land, gently landing on a patch of dirt near the bottom of the cliff. Although this ship wasn't a part of the Ark I still felt a strong sense of hope that somehow it would be them. My family. Raven, Monty, Harper, Murphy, even Emori, and Echo. But most importantly Bellamy. I spent every day for the past 6 years talking to him, whether he could hear me or not.

Although I had Madi to keep me company I still relied on him to keep me sane. I never had the chance to tell him how I felt and to this day I still regret it. I told Madi stories about everyone almost every day, it was her favorite thing to do. But her favorite stories were the ones that included Bellamy. I missed him and our witty banter. I could almost hear him calling my name with his deep, rugged voice sometimes. I could still see every freckle on his beautiful face, his round brown eyes, his perfectly sculpted face.

The ship was quiet. As much as I wanted to run down and see if it was Bellamy, it took all of my strength to stop myself. If it was them they would come looking for her anyway, or at least any form of human life. For all, they knew everyone here was dead.

Eligius Corporation I repeated to myself. Over and over again. I had repeated it so many times it stopped meaning anything. I began to reminisce every detail about our survival on Earth. Our first interaction with the grounders, our first encounter with the mountain men, but nothing stuck. A chill went down my spine. I got it. Becca Pramheda. Eligius Incorporation. It was a part of the ship that Becca used when she was up in space to create nightblood, to get away from Allie, to try to prevent the cataclysm. They could have been alive all this time. I mean they were scientists after all.

My train of thought is broken when I hear movement from the ship. The doors slowly open letting out a loud thud as it hit the floor. I exhaled a deep breath, I hadn't even noticed I was holding it. I relaxed my body, slowly releasing my gun. My fingertips were bruising from how hard I had held it.

I see dark figures walk out of the ship, faces covered with brown cloth bags, hands bound by rope. As soon as they stepped down onto the ground the doors to the ship closed immediately behind them. Could this be it? Could this be them? My heart ached as I watched the figures stand out in front of the ship.

 **Bellamy:**

I felt a push from behind and then a sudden burst of cool air wrapping around my body. Chills overcame me, I felt the fresh air, the sun hitting me. I couldn't see anything but I imagined the beautiful greenery. I could smell the sweet smell of Earth; slightly different than the last time I had been here. It felt like the weight was taken off my shoulders.

"GUYS. ARE YOU HERE? ARE WE WHERE I THINK WE ARE?" Raven shouted from a few feet over. Her voice was filled with excitement.

"Yes…yes. I'm with you Raven. Can any of you see or are you all covered with bags too?" replied Monty.

"I guess it's just another day on Earth," Murphy said sarcastically.

What was the point of sending us out if we can't see anything, we can't do anything? What did these people want? Why did they send us out after keeping us as prisoners for so long?

"Okay guys I have a plan," Raven called out. "If we stand back to back we can open each other's hands. Now hurry someone get behind me so we can get the hell out of here."

Without any hesitation, I slid up against Raven's back quickly fiddling my fingers trying to free her wrists as she tried to free mine Our captors must have wanted us to break free if they tied us with rope, rather than cuffing us with handcuffs but right now I could care less. We needed to get out of here and find my sister.

A few seconds and I'm free, I quickly rip off the bag wrapped around my head. My eyes burned, I had forgotten how bright the sun was. I squinted for a few seconds as my eyes adjusted to the light before completely grasping my surroundings. It was beautiful. Just how I remembered. I'd spent the last 6 years dreaming of what it would feel like to be back.

I turned to untie the others. The quicker we were free the quicker we could get away and find everyone else.

Scanning our surroundings, I began looking for evidence of life. We were near a river surrounded by trees and rocks. Suddenly my heart dropped to the ground. Adrenaline pumping through my veins. I dropped to my knees as I saw a flash of gold at the top of a cliff. Tears welled up in my eyes. The most beautiful and captivating thing in the world.

Clarke. Standing at the top of the cliff gripping her gun. Tears flooding her beautiful round face. She looked relieved, scared, happy all at once. I knew she was alive from her daily radio entries, but seeing her right now feels unreal. I feel like I'm home again.

"THANK GOD" I hear Raven yell as she moved closer to me, resting her hand on my shoulder. "GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE AND HELP US." Her voice was shaking. She was crying, quickly wiping away her tears as she looked at me. "Clarke saves the day again." She was laughing, tears still falling down her face.

"I think it's best if we make a run for it now before those people come out and lock us up again," I said calmly trying to cover the lump in my throat from seeing Clarke.

"Good idea Bellamy, let's go" Monty replied.

We set off running with every ounce of strength through the forest. We had to hurry, we had to get to Clarke. I had to see her. My legs were sore, it had been a while since I had to run such a long distance. We trained on the Ark, but definitely not enough to bounce back immediately.

"Do you even know where you're going?" Murphy was breathless, clearly out of shape. Unlike the rest of us, Murphy spent his time on the Ark sitting back and relaxing. I don't blame him though if Clarke was on the Ark with us all I would want to do is spend time with her.

"Who cares? Keep running." Raven was limping behind us, but we made sure to keep a steady pace so she wouldn't fall behind.

My heart is pounding. The blood pounding in my ears leaving me incapable to hear anything else. My legs are sore. The only thing keeping me going is the chance that we'll get to Clarke sooner.


	2. Chapter 2

**Speechless**

 **Clarke:**

I couldn't contain my tears as I ran to Madi. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?" she questioned, concern and tension filled her face. She was so young but at this very moment she looked well beyond her years.

"Yes, I'm fine. It's them. They're back." I managed to get out, my voice cracking. Was I ready for this? Was Madi ready for this? Would they accept her? Had anything changed?

"Hurry up then let's go meet them! NOW!" she squealed. Amusement lighting up her face. "I've heard so much about these people I just want to meet them already." She yanked my arm in excitement. I didn't think she would be this excited. But why not, she listened to me tell stories about them almost every day. Her favorite stories were about Octavia and Bellamy.

"Let's go my little nightblood." I said as I began to gather some food, water, and other necessary supplies. Madi had already stocked up all our guns and packed them into the Rover.

Before we knew it, we were racing out to where they were. Bellamy looked so broken when he saw me, yet so relieved. Like the weight of the world had just been lifted. He looked the same way he did when he found me with Roan in the cave. I spent every day for the past 6 years imagining what I would do if I got to see him again but I didn't know what to do. An uncontrollable happiness consumed me.

"So, are you going to finally tell Bellamy the truth?" Madi whispered breaking my train of thought.

"What…what are you talking about?" I stuttered. I don't think I'm ready to even look him in the eyes let alone confess my feelings for him.

"You and I both know that you love him, you've been telling him every day on some broken radio. So, why not tell him now that he's actually going to be here with you?" she responded a look in her eyes I had never seen before. She was right. I knew I had to do it but I think I should let him settle in before I pledge my love to him.

"I was talking to myself, that doesn't count. Besides I can't just come out with my unspoken feelings for him right now he hasn't even been on earth for a day. Who knows what he'll do." I just felt so overwhelmed with this rush of feelings.

We reached the tree line at the bottom of the cliff just as we were about to head in we saw figures sprinting at us. Madi quickly jumped up without thought, peeking her head out of the sunroof. She pointed the rifle at the figured running. I grabbed my rifle aiming it out of the window.

Tears swelled up in my eyes. I felt a kick to my gut as I saw their faces. My family. The people who made up my dreams every day for the past 6 years. I couldn't control the tears as they fell down my cheeks.

"CLARKE" Raven yelled breaking my blank gaze. My face and my neck was covered in tears. She was limping behind everyone else. I quickly jumped out to greet them.

"MADI STAND DOWN IT'S THEM." I yelled as I jumped out of the Rover. I was rammed by strong muscular arms wrapping me into an embrace so tight it took my breath away. Finally. I was complete. I began my head into his long neck, taking in the familiar scent of Bellamy. His dark curly locks brushing against my forehead. Tears were streaming down my face and down his neck.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I'm sorry that we left you. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you," Bellamy cried into my ear his tears ran down his face dripping onto my shoulder. I squeezed him, I couldn't even find the strength to say anything so I just squeezed him the tears felt endless.

"Get a room" mumbled Murphy. I never would've thought that I would miss Murphy and his snarky comments.

Finally, we break free, Bellamy set me down. He took a step back and looked at me, drinking in every detail as if trying to commit me to memory. My heart dropped and the tears continued as he gave me that famous Bellamy smirk.

Raven cleared her throat, "Hi, Clarke we missed you too." My face became red. I grabbed Raven and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"I missed you too, I missed all of you. You have no idea how weird it felt to be here without you guys." I turned to everyone else, starting to greet everyone. I could feel Bellamy's eyes on me as I hugged everyone. Monty lined up behind Murphy and Emori. Soon pulling me into a hug, he quietly stepped back while holding my shoulders scanning me. "This feels so unreal. I'm glad you're alive," Monty sighed.

I quickly hugged Harper and Echo. I stepped back and just looked at them. They all looked familiar, but I knew they weren't the same people that had gone up to space 6 years ago. There was a lot of catching up to do.

Madi sat in the Rover quietly watching everyone. Clearly, she was nervous. I grabbed Madi's hand pulling her out, standing her in front of me. "This is Madi, she has been keeping me sane while you all were gone. She's a…"

"Nightblood, we know we got your messages" Bellamy smirked. Blood rushed to my face. I could feel my face blushing uncontrollably. I dropped my eyes down to the floor avoiding eye contact with everyone. A part of me always believed that they couldn't hear me.

"You…you heard all of them?" I stuttered avoiding eye contact.

"Well Bellamy hogged the radio when you were talking, but yes we heard them ALL." Raven laughed. I could feel my face beaming red. "Well let's leave the rest of our reunion talk for when we're somewhere safe, who knows if those people are coming after us."

"Okay hurry, everyone get in" I said scanning the area. There was no one in sight, but Raven is right better to be safe than to be sorry.

"Did you finally learn how to drive Clarke?" Bellamy laughed. Sitting in the passenger's seat beside me.

"Well without you here, I had to." I peeked over my shoulder, giving him a small smirk. Sitting next to him, I felt the electricity, that same spark we had always shared.

"Well you don't need to do that anymore because I'm not letting you out of my sight," he leaned over whispering in my ear, sending goosebumps all over my body. It was like a shock had taken over me.

I continued driving. We all sat in silence, everyone was one guard. Paranoid of what could happen. Life on Earth was never easy.

I focused my attention on a sleeping Bellamy sitting next to me. He was clearly exhausted. Bags formed under his eyes over the years, he looked like had aged so much since I last saw him. But he was still such a beautiful sight. Bellamy's nice square jaw, his bone structure still well defined, soft plump lips. I just wanted to take in every detail of his being. He knows how I feel about him, but did he feel the same way?

I slowly pulled up to the lab's garage. Closing the door behind me. "Okay guys we're home" I said while nudging Bellamy. He abruptly jumped up and clenched his hands into fists. He was damaged and I understood completely, I was the same way. I set my hand on his fist trying to calm him, he instantly released.

He looked over at me, his eyes glowing even through the darkness. The corners of his shifting to a soft smirk. "Thank you for saving us. Again."

"You're my people, my family. I would do anything for you." I felt tears burning in my eyes, but I held them back as I stared at him.

"Let's get out of here." Bellamy gave my hand a squeeze before turning to get out. I hadn't felt this relieved in so long. I didn't have much to worry about since Madi and I were the only two people walking on the ground for the past 6 years, but a part of me was always worried. Worried about Bellamy, worried about my mom, worried that I'd never see them again.

 **Bellamy:**

Waking up I felt Clarke's hand on my shoulder, immediately making me jump. I had been dreaming of what it would feel like to wake up to her beautiful face for so many years, but this was so much better. No dream could ever compare to the feeling of actually being with her.

I felt so grateful, Clarke was always there for us. She always put everyone before she put herself. "Thank you for saving us. Again."

Her eyes lit up. Her pale blue eyes locked into mine. "You're my people, my family. I would do anything for you." I couldn't help but smile, she always had that effect on me.

I leaned over squeezing her hand. "Let's get out of here."

We jumped out of the Rover, everyone went inside but I stayed and helped Clarke take everything back inside. She was thinner than I had last seen her. Her face was more defined. She had red streaks in her hair complimenting the golden strands that fell on her face.

"Are you just going to stand there and gawk or are you going to come in?" Clarke laughed. She looked so young when she laughed. I hadn't even realized I was staring at her.

"I-I'm coming, I guess I'm still in shock." I stuttered. She scanned my face, smiling even bigger than before. I flashed her a smirk and followed her up to the office. The same office we had last been alone together. Following her up the stairs, taking in every stride she made. Watching her hips sway from left to right as she took each step. I was mesmerized. As soon as she reached the room she looked back at me her eyes widening as she quickly turns to gather up some drawings.

"I see you've been keeping yourself busy" I say resting my hand on hers stopping her from hiding her work. I looked into her bright eyes, they looked scared maybe a little embarrassed her face was becoming pinker by the second. I looked down and noticed she was covering one specific drawing. It was of me. I was smiling. The type of smile I could only ever give her. "Let me see" I say reaching out for all the papers in her hand. I had slept in her cell while I was on the Ark, admiring her artwork. I never would've thought that she would be down here drawing me.

She lets go of the papers revealing multiple drawings of me. "So, I'm your muse, now aren't I?" I tried to hide my sarcasm behind a smirk.

She avoided making eye contact, I grabbed her chin lifting her eyes up to meet mine. It was clear she didn't expect me to make it down let alone see that she had been drawing me for the past 6 years.

"I've missed you Bell." Those 4 words hit me like acid rain. I felt myself melting in her gaze. Tears began to pool in her eyes, they looked as deep as the ocean.

"I've missed you so much more," I say pulling her head into my chest. She could probably hear my heart breaking through my chest. I could feel my shirt clinging to my body as it soaked up Clarke's tears.

"It's okay Clarke, everything's fine now. We're all safe." I whispered in her ear. Stepping back, I looked at her up and down she was a changed woman. She had been strong for so long she needed to let it all out. "How about you set up the bed and we can figure everything out?"

She nodded and quickly moved to pull the bed out of the couch. I stood and watched her swiftly move around the room. Before I knew it, she had set up all the pillows and blankets. Once she finished she rushed out of the room, I followed her until the doorway. She was searching through the drawers in the hallway. "Can I help you?" I asked.

Glancing over her shoulder she responded, "No I just think I should get you some fresh clothes so you can shower." Yes. A shower. I hadn't taken one in so long.

I flashed her a smile before she turned back. Pulling out black pants and a grey shirt she handed them to me. My cheeks were hurting from smiling so much, I guess I wasn't used to it. I can't remember the last time I had smiled this much in one day.

Suddenly she grabbed my hand and guiding me out of the office and into a bathroom. "Here's the shower, I'll go make you some food and then we can talk okay?"

"Okay" I said. She turned around but as she was about to walk out the door, I grabbed her arm, pulling her into me. "I just want you to know I thought about you every day too."

Her mouth parted as if she were to respond but she was speechless. Her face flushed. She quickly got herself together smiled, pulling away from me. Before leaving she whispered, "We can talk about it all _after_ you shower." Flashing me a small smile before turning to leave.

I couldn't get enough of her. She made me feel things no other girl had ever given me. She loved me unconditionally. She was the only person who understood me. Fully flawed Bellamy Blake.


	3. Chapter 3

**Mine**

 **Clarke:**

I walked into the lab and heated up some meat. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but I had no idea where to start. He told me he was sorry for everything, but the truth is I never once blamed him for anything. Had I been in the same position I would have done the same thing. I mean _it is hard running things_ right? How could I blame him for doing what's right? Why would he think that I would blame him? Almost everything was ready I just had to wake up everyone. Bellamy is clearly still enjoying his shower.

I walked into a room, Raven was sleeping on one of the beds. I lightly nudged her, "wake up Raven I made some food and found some clothes for you to wear after your shower."

She jumped up yelling, "DON'T TOUCH ME." As soon as she came to her senses and realized where she was, quickly apologizing, "I'm so sorry Clarke. I'm just still in shock." She put her hand on my shoulder giving me an apologetic smile. "Did you say shower?" We both let out a laugh.

"YES, because frankly, you need one," I chuckled. I grabbed her arm and yanked her off the bed.

"Rude. But I guess I can't really be mad I really do need a shower," she giggled.

She followed me to where I had set our table to eat. "You eat I'll go and wake up the others. Enjoy some food." I locked eyes with her while she took a large bite of the boar. "These are your clothes and a towel, you can shower after you eat." I waved my hand in the direction of the pile of clothes. She gave me a nod, her mouth too full to respond.

I was walking to go wake up Murphy and Emori when I felt two hands rest on the curves of my waist. I took in the sweet scent of Bellamy. Goosebumps covered my entire body. He chuckled as he slid his hand across the goosebumps on my arms.

"I guess you are attracted to me," he laughed into my ear causing my goosebumps to grow.

I rolled my eyes, still frozen in time with his hands on my waist. "Possibly, but we can talk about that later," I whispered back. "there's food downstairs. Raven is eating you can join her." He slowly released his grip on my waist. I turned to look at him bringing my hand to his cheek running my fingers across freckles. I looked into his sad eyes and let out a sigh. "Bellamy, please. Go eat."

My face was plastered with a smile, the kind of ear to ear smile that makes your face start to hurt. As I turned to walk towards Murphy and Emori's room I notice Madi smiling at me. I hadn't even noticed her standing there. She gave me a big smile followed by a big hug.

"I love seeing you happy Clarke." I released her from our long embrace.

"Why don't you go join him, I'm sure he would love to get to know you," I said before kissing her forehead. It made me so happy that Madi would finally get to know Bellamy. She had heard so much about him she was beginning to think he was just a figment of my imagination.

She quickly ran off, following Bellamy down to eat.

 **Bellamy:**

It had been so long since I had eaten anything that didn't taste like garbage. It felt amazing. The juice from the meat made my taste buds dance across my tongue.

"Relax Bellamy the food isn't going anywhere," Raven laughed. I hadn't realized my face was completely full until I was incapable to respond to her. She looked so different now than she had in space. She looked happier, healthier. I gave her a quick smile as I dug back into the well-cooked meat.

Madi joined us, greeting us with a big smile. "How do you guys like the food?" She looked a lot like Octavia when she was 12. I couldn't help but feel a bit hurt at the thought of my sister. But we would get her out, I would be sure of it.

"I'm beyond satisfied, much better than the trash we were fed while imprisoned I'll tell you that," Raven laughed.

"Thank you for everything Madi," I said resting a hand on her shoulder, flashing her a small smile. She blushed, quickly looking away.

"Don't thank me, Clarke does all the hunting she has spent this last year preparing for when you all would come," she sounded sad. Her face fell, but she regained composure and sent a small smile my way.

"Well good thing because we've been eating like crap for years," chirped Murphy. He grabbed some food and stuffed it into his mouth before he even got the chance to sit down.

"How long were you imprisoned? Who took you? How did you stop yourself from going crazy?" Madi spits out eagerly. She clearly had a million questions she was dying to ask. It was cute, she really was a lot like Octavia when she was younger. Eager to learn, eager to know things, just happy about everything. I wish she could've stayed that way forever, but now she's grown up. She's a leader.

"Well who knows how long we were in that cell together, I'd say a few months at least. We have no idea who took us because they almost never showed their faces or talked we were completely isolated. As for going crazy well, I don't know I guess being around each other kept us sane. Kind of like how you and Clarke helped each other," Raven responded giving Madi a large smile. I never would've taken Raven for the type to be good with kids, but she never fails to surprise me.

"I know who took you," Clarke responded leaning in and resting her arms on my shoulders. Catching me off guard I flinched slightly, but as soon as I realized it was her I relaxed. I looked up to meet her concerned eyes. She looked down with guilt. I gave her a smile and a small nod to reassure her, but it didn't help much.

"What? How?" Monty asked.

"The ship, it's from Eligius Corporation," Clarke said moving into a chair next to me. "They're Becca Pramheda's people or their prisoners. We weren't out there alone, Becca's people never joined the Ark. They were the ones who kidnapped you and something gives me a feeling that they won't just be leaving us alone." Her face looked dark with fear, concern, anger. Her grip on my shoulder unintentionally tightening.

"Well, what's the plan, Clarke?" Raven and Monty asked in unison. Immediately looking at each other to laugh. Everyone was smiling, it felt amazing to share even a moment of happiness together. We had spent the past few months sharing nothing but grief. The only thing that kept me going on the Ark was the sound of Clarke's voice every day, but once we were taken it got harder to not drive myself insane. But we did a good job of keeping each other going.

A smile crossed Clarke's face, "Well first things first, we have to clear out the rubble so we can get our people out from the bunker. We aren't any good without an army." She scanned the room for some input, but we all just sat in silence. Everyone's eyes focused on Clarke. "After getting them out then and only then can we come up with a plan to attack. Octavia is the leader of Wonkru so maybe she'll have a good plan on how to attack."

"Attack?" I questioned. Her face tilted to one side.

"Yes, attack. There's no way we're going to just let them live out here peacefully after everything they did to you guys." Her eyes became dark. Her grip tightening once again on my shoulder. She let out a sigh. "But if you guys want to seek peace, maybe we can arrange something."

"I say we kill them all." Leave it to Murphy to take the aggressive route. We had to be reasonable. We know nothing about them, nothing about their intentions, nothing about what they want. Attacking could be a bad idea, but we had time to consider that.

We all finished all the food that was on the table. The room was filled with noise. Lots of different conversations flying around, lots of jokes, and lots of laughter. I felt relieved to feel like this again.

"Well I don't know about you guys, but I'm exhausted. Goodnight," Murphy said as he stood up grabbing Emori's hand. A smirk crossing his face as he looked to Emori. Something tells me they won't be sleeping for a while.

"Yeah, we're going to sleep some more too," Harper said flashing a smile towards Monty. Bellamy rolled his eyes, but he understood where they were coming from. It had been way too long since any of them had any alone time.

"Well I think I could use a good night's sleep, or maybe a week," I said shooting Clarke a suggestive look. She quickly picked up on what I was getting at and joined me. I'm glad not too much had changed, she still knew exactly what I was thinking before I said it. It was one of the many reasons why we were good together.

I quickly made my way up to the room where Clarke had set up our bed. Our bed? Yes. OUR bed. I ripped off my shirt letting the cool air wrap around me. I began stretching before I reached for my pants.

"Do you ever sleep with your clothes on?" Clarke laughed behind me.

"Who said anything about sleeping?" I smirked. Her face grew pink. "I just want to spend right now making the most of our time together, I don't want to regret not doing anything anymore. I don't want to feel incomplete anymore. I…"

I was cut off when Clarke's lips met mine. Sparks were flying, goose bumps covered her body. I love the effect I have on her. She wrapped her arms around my neck. I grabbed her by her waist and lifted her up. She automatically wrapped her legs around my waist. I laid her down on the bed not allowing her mouth to let go of mine. Her fingers were tangled in my hair. My hands moved down to her waist, gripping onto them for dear life.

She pulled away holding my face in her hands, her legs still wrapped around my waist. She scanned my face with her beautiful deep blue eyes. "I don't want to lose you again," she whispered tears filled her eyes.

I grabbed her face and looking into her eyes, "I am not going anywhere, from now on wherever we go, we will go together. I don't care. I am not losing you again. You have no idea how broken I was up there before I heard your voice on the radio." I gently kissed her soft lips again. "You were what kept me going this whole time. I guess you kept me sane."

Tears streamed down her face. I moved my arm from waist to her face brushing my thumb across her cheek to gently wiping her tears away. "I missed you so much," she whispered her voice was soft.

I cupped her cheek in my hand occasionally brushing the tips of my fingers against her cheeks to wipe away the tears that slipped down her cheeks. "I love you, Clarke. I've always loved you. I've always known, I just never knew how to tell you." She looked at me confused, a wrinkle forming above her eyebrow. "First, it was Finn and I just thought you hated me so I didn't say anything." Her eyes went soft, but she smiled. "Then when we had to deal with Mount Weather you told me love was a weakness. So, a part of me knew you cared about me, but you would never want to be with me." She looked down at her hands, avoiding eye contact. I was still hovering over her, but her legs soon fell on both sides of me. "Then you left me and I just felt hopeless. I know why you left, but it still hurt me." A tear flew down her cheek. She remained silent, her eyes slowly making their way up to mine. "After we finally found you, you were with Lexa. I just couldn't sit around waiting for you to give me the time of day and I guess that's another reason why I lashed out."

"I may have hated you when we first met, but I've always cared about you. You were always the one person to understand me completely. You've understood me in a way that neither Finn nor Lexa could ever understand. I never knew if you felt the same way, and I didn't want to risk losing you so I didn't say anything." She let out a large sigh, looking back at her hands.

I lifted her chin back up so her eyes met mine. "All that matters is that we know now. We are together now. It may have taken us this long to realize, but we know now." She smiled softly towards me. "I mean technically you've already confessed your love to me but…"

She hit me in the chest as we both began laughing. Her laughter filled the room, she was actually laughing. Her smile made everything so much better. I couldn't control myself, I leaned back down and kissed her. Our kiss deepened as she rolled us over and got on top of me. She was all I needed, she was all I would ever need.

She ripped off her shirt revealing her exquisite curves. I could feel my jaw drop as I took in every detail. All her beauty. I brushed my fingers across some of the scars that covered her stomach, battle wounds. She closed her eyes, her breathing became heavy.

She leaned back down and began kissing the outline of my jaw, slowly making her way down my neck. Her kisses trailed lower, they began to go down my chest, down my stomach. She tugged on the waistband of my pants. "I can't be doing all the work Bell," she giggled. I smirked up at her.

I quickly reached down and ripped off my pants. Her legs still on both sides of my waist. I laid back resting my arms under my head, a huge grin plastered across my face. But my relaxing position was soon compromised as she got a hold of me. We were going at it hot and heavy. Moans and grunts filled the room. Skin to skin. I had Clarke. All to myself. She was mine.

We were constantly fighting for power, but what else would you expect from two people who had shared power. Eventually, Clarke gave up and gave me all the power. I continued, every moan turning me on more and more. She tore at my shoulder every time I made her scream. My mouth found hers trying to quiet her down. I collapsed on top of her, but body completely relaxing. She wrapped her arms around my waist.

"Wow," she sighed laying her head back staring up at the ceiling. "That was- "

"AMAZING" I finished for her, slowly rolling off of her. We laid there out of breath. I had loved her and wanted her for so long, but nothing compared to this feeling. She was mine. I turned to face her, moving up to my elbow so I could get a good look at her. I wanted to embrace every moment of this. Her eyes were closed. I memorized every detail, of her face, of her body, of the room.

Clarke opened her eyes and shifted mimicking my position staring right back at me. "I could definitely get used to having this for the rest of my life," she said her eyes locked onto mine.

I gave her a nice little smirk, "Clarke Griffin wants to spend the rest of her life with ME?" I laughed.

She reached out and started moving her fingers across my cheeks, dancing across every freckle on my face. "It's always ever been you Bell. You're my family." Tears fell down her cheeks, her hand still caressing my face.

I wiped her face and pulled her closer so I could kiss her. We both laid back I pulled her into my chest, kissing her forehead. "Goodnight Clarke," I whispered into her ear.

She squeezed my chest, her eyes still shut. "Goodnight Bell," she whispered back.


	4. Chapter 4

**Break In**

 **Clarke:**

I woke up to Bellamy wrapped around me. He felt like home. He made me feel safe. Finally. He was mine. I laid there and admired his face, taking in every detail. He looked so innocent. Underneath his sleepy innocence I knew he was damaged and needed more than anything to have something solid to lean on. He didn't show it in front of anyone, but when it was just me and him I could see it. His eyes carry so much pain, but he doesn't carry that pain alone.

Suddenly I'm pulled from my thoughts as Bellamy begins to tighten his grip around my waist. "NO! CLARKE COME BACK!" He was still asleep. He was having a nightmare. A nightmare about me. His body had flooded with sweat.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, cradling his head. "Bellamy it's okay," I whispered in his ear, stroking his hair. "I'm fine, I'm right here. I'm with you. I'm not going anywhere." His body became tense. It hurt me to think that he must have been having nightmares like this for the past few years. With no one to help him. A frown grew on my face.

He jolted up, breathing heavily. His body still covered in sweat. I caressed his face and kissed his cheek. "It's okay Bellamy I'm right here." I pulled him back into my chest and ran my fingers through his thick, wet hair. His body finally relaxing. He let out a large sigh of relief.

He slowly pulled away, his eyes meeting mine. His lips met mine as he kissed me gently. "Thank you," he whispered against my lips. I could feel him smiling against my lips.

I kissed him one more time before resting my face on his shoulder slowly creeping my face up against the crook of his neck. "How about a shower?" I whispered in his ear. I could see the goose bumps grow on the back of his neck.

Immediately Bellamy jumped up putting on some pants, grabbing clothes, and a towel. "I say let's go." After grabbing everything he quickly wrapped me up in the blanket. "No time for clothes now Princess." I squealed as he picked me up. He looked down at me, a smile covering his face from ear to ear.

"Now that's something I haven't heard in a while." I laughed resting my head on Bellamy's shoulder as he carried me to the bathroom. When we first landed he used to call me Princess to spite me, but now it had changed completely. Said with love and affection.

Bellamy's eyes fell to the floor as he began to blush. "You will always be my Princess." He smiled as he opened the door to the bathroom. I could feel the blood rush to my face as a large grin spread across my cheeks.

"Now who would have ever thought that we'd ever be so domestic." His eyes moved to mine, a smile was plastered across his face. Bellamy rarely smiled, but his smile never failed to take my breath away.

"Don't ruin the moment," he scolded. Bellamy eventually set me down in the bathroom. I sat back against the wall wrapped up in the blanket Bellamy covered me with. Watching him turn on the hot shower. His muscles were flexing as he stood and stretched up trying to get rid of the tension in his back. There were scratch marks all over his shoulders. I didn't even realize I had done so much damage, but clearly, it was nothing that he couldn't handle.

I stood up and kissed the scratch marks on his back. "How about I give you a little massage after we shower, you're going to need well-rested muscles if we're going to try to dig up the rest of our family," I mumbled against his back.

He turned around pushing me against the sink trapping me between his arms. "I say we take a nice hot shower and take advantage of the alone time we have, just you and me in our bed. You know before everyone else wakes up." His eyes were filled with fire and desire.

I gently kissed his lips, running my finger across his lips. His eyes shut as soon as I touched him. "We can do whatever you want Bell." He let out a deep chuckle, taking in the memories of our first few encounters on Earth.

He was smiling, not a smirk but a real smile. He would never look like this around anyone but me. That's why I loved him, I knew a part of him that no one else did. There was a part of him that was exclusively for me. None of the girls he had hooked up with before could ever share the luxury of having all of Bellamy.

I couldn't help but laugh when I thought back to the girls who came down with the 100. All they ever did was stand around and obsess over Bellamy Blake. A large smile came across my face. "What's so funny?" Bellamy's brows furrowed as he stared down at me with confusion. His weight pressed against his hands on the sink trapping me between him.

I looked back at Bellamy, my smile slowly turned to a smirk. "It's just when we first got down here together all the girls ever did was obsess over you. I didn't get it, but now I do."

Bellamy tilted his head to one side questioning what I said. "So, you're obsessed with me huh?" A large smirk crossed his face. I opened my mouth completely speechless at his annoying comment. I hit him in the chest before letting out a small laugh.

After we both stopped laughing Bellamy leaned down and kissed my cheek. "How about that shower?" He continued kissing down my jawline slowly making his way to my neck.

I reached up and grabbed his face our lips coming together like magnets. He picked me up slowly carrying me to the shower, our kiss only getting deeper with every step he took. We were hungry for each other. Before I knew it, I was pinned against the wall of the shower. Bellamy's lips kissing every inch of me.

He pulled away looking me up and down, "I need you, Clarke, I need you all the time. Promise me we will face everything together from now on. I can't lose this." Tears welled up in his eyes, his body was slowly becoming tenser.

I ran my fingers through his hair. As I did he closed his eyes, deeply inhaling a breath of air. He began to slowly relax. "I need you too. Whatever we face from now on we will face together. I promise." Our eyes locked on one another. He gently leaned in, kissing me. I grabbed the back of his head deepening the kiss.

Bellamy was unbelievably amazing. Every move he made sent shocks through my body. He made me feel things I never knew were possible. From the way, he kissed me to the way he moaned just made everything better. I don't think I could ever get tired of this.

As we finished up our shower, Bellamy pulled me into a tight embrace. His arms tightened as his tears fell down my neck. I stroked his soft, wet hair not saying a word. He needed to let it all out. "It's okay," I whispered as he continued to cry. I know the best thing I can do for him is to be here for him.

After a few minutes, he pulled away. His eyes had turned red and puffy. I caressed his face as he let out a sigh. I wiped the tears from his face. He was damaged, I damaged him. He was broken because of me. I feel terrible, but I know that the only way to fix him is to be there for him. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything Clarke?" His face full of confusion, his eyebrows wrinkling up.

I closed my eyes trying to stop the tears from coming out, but they burned through. "I'm sorry for leaving you, for not being there for you, for never telling you how I feel, for never letting you tell me how you feel. I don't know. I'm sorry for hurting you."

He wiped the tears running down my cheeks. He lifted my chin so that his eyes met mine. "No, don't do this. There is nothing to apologize for. You saved my life. You saved everyone's lives. I don't want to hear you ever feeling sorry again." His face was serious and full of concern. "I forgave you a long time ago remember? We don't need to do this again."

Tears flooded my eyes, but I held as much of it in as I could. I was speechless. All I could do was bury my face into Bellamy's chest and sob quietly. He pulled away gently kissing my cheek and wiping away my tears. "Now come on let's go." I kiss him one last time before turning around.

I slip into Bellamy's shirt as he puts his pants back on. I grab his hand rushing out the door to get back to our room. We try to slip away without being seen, but we're addressed with a yawning Raven, "I know you guys are finally back together, but could you keep it down? We don't need to traumatize Madi with your moans and groans all night."

Bellamy and I exchanged looks, both blushing. I had completely forgotten about Madi, I wonder where she spent last night. Usually, she sleeps with me. "Oh, don't worry Clarke she slept with me last night, I assumed you'd be a little… occupied." She looked to me with a smirk tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Bellamy rolled his eyes as he wrapped his arms around my waist. "Well excuse us if we wanted to make the most of our night." I leaned down pulling at the bottom of Bellamy's shirt making sure it covered me. As Bellamy noticed he quickly grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder. Turning to walk to our room. "Now if you'll excuse me we have a lot more catching up to do." I couldn't see his face, but I could sense a large smile in his voice. As Bellamy carried me away I flashed Raven a large smile. She just stood in the hallway her arms resting across her chest and her eyebrows raised in shock.

 **Bellamy:**

I laid Clarke down on our bed gently, locking my eyes onto hers. I loved this woman, she was the best thing to ever happen to me.

"Well, you already know what I have been up to for all these years so how about you update me on what you've been doing." She broke me away from my thoughts. I looked over to meet her beautiful blue eyes. "Earth to Bellamy. Are you going to say anything?"

I hadn't realized I didn't respond. I was lost in her eyes. This was the first time I could look right into them. Not having to look away in fear of staring at her for too long and making things weird. "Sorry, I just… I just had a really rough past few years without you. Before I knew you were alive I used to drink a lot. I did a lot of things I regret. But once I found out that you were going to be there when I got back I got my act together." Clarke's face darkened. "You've made me a better person ever since we landed here, but even while you weren't up there with me you still managed to guide me to do the right thing." I searched her face for a reaction, but she was good at hiding what she was feeling.

Raven burst into our room, her face full of fear. "They're here," she spluttered as she was out of breath.

Clarke quickly got up. Her body and face tense. "Who's here?" she questioned. Her hands slowly balled up into fists as she jumped to a monitor near our bed. She quickly began typing, punching in a few codes.

Raven jumped behind her and scanned the screen. Two figures appeared on the screen, surveillance. "Is this place secured? Can they get in? Are we fully armed?"

I jumped up standing beside them, scanning the people standing outside. They're wearing suits, similar to the hazmat suits we wore when we were leaving earth along with big helmets. "They're the guards that took us in. They're from the ship. I know it." Raven and Clarke both turned to look at me. "We have plenty of ammo, I say we go out and take them in as prisoners. Maybe we can get some information about what they want."

I could see Clarke considering what I said as she looked up at the ceiling trying to decide what actions to take. "Wake everyone up Raven, Bellamy and I will meet you downstairs we can all decide what we should do."

Raven quickly limped out of the room. Clarke swiftly moved across the room to put on her pants and some shoes. I followed suit, but before we walked out of the room I grabbed Clarke's arm. Pulling her back to me. "Before we go downstairs…"

"No Bellamy we don't have time," she cut me off. Her eyes darted back to the door.

I tilted my head to the side and grabbed both her shoulders. "No, you always do this when there's something going on, but I won't have it anymore. I need to tell you that I love you and whatever we do I want you to remember the promise we made. We will face everything together." I just didn't want to get down there and have everything change, when it came to trouble Clarke was always one to run in the direction of it. I wasn't going to let her do that alone anymore.

Her face became soft, tears welled up in her eyes. She wrapped her arms around my waist. "I'm not going anywhere. I promised to remember?" I could feel her tears soaking into my shirt as she hugged me. "I love you, Bellamy." I kissed the top of her head, letting her cry.

After a few minutes, she pulled away, quickly wiping her tears away. Her face became expressionless. "Now let's go," she said clearing her throat. Clarke was always better at hiding her feelings than I was. She turned around walking down to the lab. I followed her down to find everyone standing there waiting for us.

"So, what's the plan?" Raven asked. Her eyes moving back and forth from my face to Clarke's face. Everyone was looking to us for a plan. Raven, Murphy, Monty, Harper, Emori, Madi, and even Echo. Everyone was ready to fight.

My eyes met Clarke's as we both simultaneously nodded. "Harper, Bellamy, Murphy, Echo you four go down and get the guns ready with ammo, we need to be prepared for absolutely anything we have come too far to let these people get in our way. Raven, Emori, Monty you'll help Madi and me with trying to get our drone up and running so we can get a better view of who these people are and how many of them there are." Her voice full of confidence. Her head was held high.

"I think we should prep the Rover too. Pack it with food, supplies, ammo just in case we need a quick getaway," Raven responded.

"Okay Harper, Echo, Emori you three should prep the Rover with everything we'll need. Murphy, you come with me, we can get the guns together. I think Madi should come with us too, we'll need all hands-on deck if we want to be ready for anything. Besides she knows more about what we have and what we might need," I ordered. Clarke gave me a reassuring nod before she turned to leave the room.

Quickly Madi leads us to this large room filled with guns. "There's a line of guns to the left, larger ones are against the wall, smaller ones are in the drawers. The ammo is to your right, fill anything that isn't already full. We have a lot of guns that are already in the Rover, but I think we should put the rest in there as well. There are a few trap doors in there to hide smaller guns. Clarke told me if we ever have to leave we shouldn't leave any of this behind." She was so much like Clarke. Her confidence, the way she carried herself, the way she walked, the way she talked.

We followed her orders quickly checking each gun and packing them carefully into the Rover. Echo and Harper returned with blankets, pillows, clothes, and food. Carefully placing them into the back of the Rover's cabinets.

Clarke had really made this old Rover a home. She took out the seats in the back, leaving more room for more people. More room for us to live together if we needed to. I'm sure Clarke had a plan B in case something like this happened though.

Clarke, Raven, and Monty come running into the room. "Okay, they're trying to break in so we need to cover all of our doors. Monty, Harper, Echo you three cover the back door in case there's more of them. Bellamy, Madi, Emori, Murphy we're covering the front door in case they somehow manage to break through the door. Raven stay in the Rover and be ready to pull out if we need to get away. We still have no idea what these people are capable of." Quickly everyone armed themselves with guns and head to their designated spots.

Murphy and I stand front and center ready to hit them as soon as they get in. Clarke and Madi are huddled behind some tables to our left as Emori is huddled to the right ready in case they get past us.

My heart began pounding as the door began to loosen up. This was it. Time to fight for our lives again.


	5. Chapter 5

**Taken**

 **Clarke:**

As the door broke down to our haven I tightened the grip on my gun and my heart dropped as they burst through the doors. Instantly I hear gunshots. Our goal was to keep them alive. My thoughts were drowned out by the heavy screaming of the men. Bellamy and Murphy stood above them as blood began to pool out of their legs. They had guns in their holsters, but they didn't get the chance to take them out. I'm assuming they didn't expect anyone to be here.

Quickly Bellamy and Murphy picked the two men up and set them across two tables. "We need to tie them down," Bellamy commanded.

Flashbacks of when we had tortured Lincoln ran through my head. "No! We don't need to give them another reason to hate us. We've tried the torture method once and it didn't help us at all." The two men were screaming in pain, Bellamy had shot one man in the waist. Murphy shot the other man in the thigh.

"I think we should at least tie one hand. What if they try to make a move?" Bellamy looked at me his eyes filled with concern.

"If they actually knew we were here, they would have taken the guns out of their holsters and been ready for a fight Bellamy." His face softened as he began to realize that I was right. I quickly grabbed the medical kit that I had put together and began to fix their wounds.

I was almost done and Bellamy was still hovering over me. I could feel his eyes running back and forth from me to these two men. Bellamy was just being cautious. Everyone else was armed and still guarding both doors. Raven was now out of the Rover and working on setting up drones to attack outsiders.

The two men laid on the tables grimacing as I wrapped their wounds. But as I worked neither of them moved. It was like they were made of stone. "All done. Now you two can sit up. I'm sure we have some things to discuss."

The men simultaneously moved up as if they were robotic. They checked their injuries before looking at one another. Bellamy took a step forward and stood by my side, his arms folded across his chest. I glanced up at his face as he stared at them. His eyes looked threatening. "So, let's start with the basics. Who are you and what do you want from us?" I stared back and forth from one man to the other. Their faces looked emotionless. Neither of them said a word. "Look, we're sorry we shot you but you really didn't give us a choice."

One man huffed. "We didn't give you a choice? You shot us, we weren't coming in looking for a fight." His eyes were full of anger.

"Well, what else do you expect? You were breaking down our door. We weren't going to greet you with a cup of tea now were we?" Murphy chuckled in the background. He stopped laughing immediately as Bellamy turned and gave him a look.

"You need to know that we don't want to hurt you, we just want to know why you're here and why you took my friends from the Ark." I tried to remain calm, but judging by their response they weren't looking to be reasonable.

The man that was shot in the leg jumped up quickly punching me in the face. Before I could react, Bellamy had already pinned him to the ground laying out endless punches to his face. "Bellamy get off!"

He shoved the man's face into the ground before finally getting up. The man's face was covered in blood. He moved his head towards the door as a huge grin came across his face.

Before I could look at what he was smiling at the room echoed with gunshots. Quickly Bellamy grabbed me and pulled me towards the garage where we had the Rover ready. I turned to see people in hazmat suits filling the room. Echo, Harper, and Monty covering us as we ran. Quickly Bellamy opened the door to the garage as Raven turned on the engine. I stood peeking out of the sunroof trying cover Monty, Echo, and Harper as they ran towards us.

Raven took off as they jumped in. Bellamy joined me through the roof shooting at this army running after us. As we drove away I saw them carrying someone out. Long brown hair. Suddenly my heart was in my throat and tears flooded my eyes.

Madi.

 **Bellamy:**

I grabbed Clarke and pulled her into the Rover. "GO BACK THEY HAVE MADI." I knew how much Madi meant to Clarke and there was no way I was going to leave her behind.

"Bellamy if we go back we will all die." Raven was right. We had to get somewhere safe and come up with a plan.

I focused my attention back on Clarke. She was hyperventilating. Tears were pouring down her cheeks. I felt like my heart was being ripped out. Clarke is in pain and there's nothing I can do to help. I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her in for a hug. She just needs to breathe. "Don't worry Clarke. We'll get her back."

"I say we go towards their ship, if they're taking her anywhere it'll most likely be back to their ship, right? There's only about 14 of them not counting the ones we've shot," Monty suggested. We had enough rounds and weapons to take them down if all of us attacked together. We can't just let them take Madi.

"You're right. Monty, Murphy, Harper, and I will be ready with guns. Echo and Emori can be ready to take Madi. Raven, you stay here with Clarke and be ready to go when we get back."

"No, I'm going with you!" Clarke looked back at me. Her eyes filled with rage. There was no way I could let her go out there like this.

"No. You are going to stay here with Raven. We have enough people to take down all 14 of them." Her face hardened. She wasn't going to listen to me and I know it. "Okay, fine. You can come with us but you have to stay with one of us at all times." Her face softened, but her eyes were still filled with anger.

Echo opened the trap door and pulled out two large machetes. She handed one to Emori. "Well you guys can handle the guns, but I think we'll take these people down the old fashion way." A grin flashed across Emori and Echo's faces as they gleamed at one another.

Murphy shot Emori a smirk. "This should be interesting."

Clarke guided us to a bridge a few miles away from where their ship had landed. "They have to cross this bridge if they want to get home."

I scanned the forest for any sign of people, but the coast was clear. "Okay Raven go to the end of the tree line and stay there, we'll meet you there. Be prepared in case anyone decides to attack." She gave me a smile a little nod. "Be safe." We all hopped out with our weapons, Raven quickly pulled out and drove away.

"I say we get up into the trees. When we came down that's how the grounders attacked us so I think it'll be a good tactic to use to attack the new sky people. Emori, Echo you two need to attack by foot while we cover you." Everyone exchanged a quick head nod and began to climb up. I quickly grabbed Clarke's arm before she walked away. "You're not going anywhere remember? You promised." Her eyes softened as she nodded. "Okay now let's go we can share this tree right here, it's closest to the bridge, but if we stand on one of those top branches we'll be completely out of view."

She flashed me a smile before she took off, climbing up the tree. Her rifle hugged her body as she climbed swinging side to side.

A few minutes pass and we are sitting up at the top of the tree with a complete view of the bridge. "Do you really think they'll come back? Do you think we can actually save her?"

I looked over to Clarke hopelessly staring at the bridge. "I think that we will do anything and everything in our power to get her back, whether anyone likes it or not." She turned so that her eyes met mine. Slowly they filled with tears. "How about you tell me about Madi? From what I know about her, she is a lot like you." I flashed her a smile.

She took in a large breath. Looking around the forest as if Madi was going to come out at any second. She stared at the bridge. "Madi is the most amazing little girl I've ever met. She is so strong. It's funny that she reminds you of me because I always told her that she reminded me of you." She looked over through the corner of her eye before looking back to the bridge. "She's got a big heart. She's very quick on her feet. She's a fighter. We didn't necessarily have to fight for our lives, but you know."

"Well, I'm glad you had her while I was gone. I'll definitely have to thank her for keeping you alive," I laughed. I looked over to see Clarke's face gone pale. They were coming. A large group of people in black hazmat suits.

We waited for everyone to pass the tree line before we began shooting. We shot the people in the back first so they couldn't run back. The goal was to shoot to injure rather than to kill, but we knew that we would do what we needed to in order to get Madi. As Clarke and I shot the people in the back Harper and Monty shot the people in the front making it easier for Emori and Echo to run through to Madi.

Madi was being carried by two men who had dropped her in a struggle to shoot at us. The man quickly aimed towards Echo, but she went and chopped his hand off before he got the chance to fire. Emori quickly grabbed Madi and ran back.

We jumped down quickly making a run for it in case more of their people came. The tree line was soon coming to an end and the Rover was in sight. Suddenly I felt a shot hit me in the shoulder taking my breath away. I suddenly couldn't move. Another shot came hitting me in the leg, this one slowly taking me down. Another shot hit me in the back as I was falling. Murphy, Monty, and Clarke jump to catch me before I fall.

"I can't see who shot you. Run I'll try to cover you," yelled Harper as I was being carried into the back of the Rover.

"Look out he's coming for you Harper!" yelled Raven. A shot went off sending a shock through everyone, but as I laid in the back with no clue as to what was happening. Madi began to sob loudly as someone was laid down on the other side of the Rover.

I tried to look down at who was hurt, but I was pinned down by Monty as he forced a smile. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move. Slowly darkness took over my body as I fell unconscious still clueless to what was going on.


	6. Chapter 6

**Expertise**

 **Raven:**

I quickly pulled up to a hidden bunker that Madi and Clarke had found. Clarke and Bellamy were both hit by bullets. Bellamy seemed fine aside from the fact that he was unconscious, but Clarke's breathing was labored occasionally choking. From what Emori told me her pupils were dilated and her pulse was weak. Murphy and Monty carried Bellamy into the bunker as Emori and Echo carried Clarke.

I limped behind them holding Madi's shaking body. She had never truly experienced an attack like that. I got into the bunker and found a room with some chairs and tables. I sat Madi down in a chair. "I'm going to go fix Clarke okay? Don't be scared." She gave me a nod.

I quickly ran into the room that Bellamy was in to get a hold of Murphy. "Okay Monty you're going to have to work on Bellamy, while I work on Clarke. Murphy, I need you to go and sit with Madi."

Fear filled his eyes because Murphy had never been a man to comfort anyone. But instead of arguing he walked off heading towards Madi.

"Okay Monty I know this isn't your expertise, but I'm going to need you to try. You need to remove the bullet, disinfect the wound, and then stitch him up. But check for excess bleeding, if there's bleeding try to apply pressure." I just barked out commands that I've heard Clarke yell when she used to cater to the injured. I guess spending so much time in medical bay wasn't so bad.

I left the room quickly making my way down to the room where Echo and Emori had been setting up to help Clarke. She was flipped to her stomach so her wound was up and open. I quickly checked her pulse. "Okay Echo I need you to get some disinfectant and sutures from the Rover, give some to Monty and bring the rest here. Emori I need you to help me check for bleeding."

Clarke's blood was hard to see through since it was black. Who would have thought the one thing that saved her could be the one thing to getting in my way to save her? I took a deep breath as I began cleaning away the blood that surrounded the wound.

Emori handed me some tweezers so I could pick out the bullet. I looked around the top of the wound, but nothing. I had to go deeper, but I couldn't get deeper without cutting into her diaphragm.

I look to Emori as stress filled my body. "Hand me the scalpel. I need to open her up." Emori's eyes widened as she handed me the scalpel.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I cut her open. I really hope this works. Echo walks in immediately handing me the disinfectant. I set it to the side as I clear up the blood rushing out. "Echo I need you to apply pressure here. We need to control the bleeding."

As Echo stood there applying pressure I looked deeper into her diaphragm. I curse at myself. I can't find this bullet. I look up and roll my shoulders trying to relax my body so I could go back in.

Tears burned in my eyes, but I didn't let them fall. I WILL fix Clarke. She WILL make it. She saved our lives countless times, I NEED to save her.

Just then I hear someone burst through the door. Bellamy. I could tell without even having to turn around. I heard him gasp as he took in what was happening. "GET HIM OUT OF HERE…NOW MONTY!"

I don't want him here, he'll only stress me out more with his sad eyes. I can't deal with that right now. There was a reason doctors didn't allow loved ones in the room while they did surgery.

He squats in front of Clarke, I still didn't look up at him. I had to find this bullet. Immediately. I dig deeper with my tweezers suddenly hitting something hard. I blink away the tears that filled my eyes before looking up at Bellamy.

I let out a deep breath I hadn't noticed I was holding. "It missed her lungs and I got out the bullet. She should be fine." I look back down pulling out the bullet and placing it on the side. Thankfully there was no excess bleeding.

Bellamy and Emori start talking about something, but I'm too distracted to pay attention. I disinfect the surrounding tissue and begin to stitch her back up. I look up to see Bellamy and Emori gone.

Echo's face looked tense. I could tell she was hurt by Bellamy's feelings toward Clarke but I remained silent.

I wrap up Clarke's wound and flip her on her back. I check her pulse, and it's slowly getting back to normal. Echo leaves the room as I cover Clarke back up. I pull up a chair and rest my head in my hands by the side of her cot.

I don't know how Clarke did this, it's so stressful. As I was alone with an unconscious Clarke I let my tears flow down my cheeks. So much has happened in such little time and all I could do was cry. I quickly wipe my tears before resting my head at Clarke's side. I want to be here when/if she wakes up.

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up covered in sweat, my entire body was throbbing from the pain. As I laid on my stomach I tried to look around, but my wounds kept me restricted. I was in what looked like another hideaway. I couldn't see much considering my limited movement. All I could see were Monty's shoes in front of me. I groaned as he tried to fix the wound in my shoulder.

That's when it hit me. "Why are you fixing me up? Where's Clarke?" I could feel the blood leave my face. Breathing became harder. I could feel myself trembling under Monty's hands.

Monty let out a large sigh. I couldn't see his face, but I could feel the tension in the room. "WHERE IS CLARKE?"

He squatted in front of me so that I could see his face. "Clarke is…hurt at the moment and um…she's being taken care of by Raven, Emori, and Echo." He forced a smile. I immediately tried to get up, but Monty pinned me down. "I know you want to go see her, but you need to let me fix you up first." He was tense, he tried to hide the fear in his eyes, but I saw right through him.

I complied allowing Monty to patch me up. As I laid there I was too distracted by my thoughts to even feel the pain of his inexperienced hands on my back. Tears welled up in my eyes as I thought of anything happening to Clarke, but I kept them from falling. I needed to be strong.

Once I find out Clarke is okay, I'm going after these people. I don't care. Rage filled my body.

"Okay, you're all done here." I tried to get up, but Monty stopped me. "Hold on, I'll help you just wait."

He helped me roll off the cot and stand up slowly. Pain once again overcame my body, but I fought through it. I had to see Clarke. "Where is she?"

Monty turned around, walking out the door and into a hallway. He took me down the hallway turning the corner and into a room at the end of the hall. I walked as I could behind him.

I walked in stunned to see Clarke laying on her stomach as Raven had her cut open. I could feel my knees giving out from right under me. I looked from Clarke's back to the back of Raven's head to Emori's face to Echo's face and then back to Clarke. "GET HIM OUT OF HERE…NOW MONTY!" Raven yelled without even turning to look at me.

I stick my arm out stopping Monty in his path from getting in my way. I step closer trying to get down to Clarke's face. I move her hair out of her unconscious face before I press my fingers against her neck to check her pulse.

A sigh of relief left my mouth as her pulse was still there. It was faint, but it was still there. She had taught me how to take someone's pulse, it felt unreal having to check hers. After everything we had been through I can't lose her.

I looked back up at Raven who was quickly working to save her life. Her black blood was all over the place. The bullet had gone into her back, missing her spine but hitting her diaphragm.

Raven lets out a large sigh of relief as she looks up to meet my eyes. "It missed her lungs and I got out the bullet. She should be fine." Tears filled her eyes, but she quickly blinked them away.

Clarke's breathing was raspy, but at least she was breathing. I looked around the room to realize Madi is nowhere to be found. I quickly jump up. "Where's Madi? Is she okay?"

"She's with John, but I'm sure she would prefer to be with you. She's been asking for you," Emori responded. I gave her a small smile before following her out the door. We walked into this room with a few chairs and tables. I see Murphy sitting across from a sleeping Madi, there were dried up tears on her cheeks. She must have been crying before she fell asleep. I felt my heart drop at the thought of how scared she may be. Clarke was all she had.

Murphy looked up, his eyes meeting Emori's. "How is she?" His eyes filled with something I had only ever seen when Emori's helmet broke on our way to go get Raven before Praimfaya. I never realized how much Murphy actually cared. As if reading my mind Murphy looks to me and says, "I care about Clarke too. She has saved my life more times than I could have ever imagined."

I just gave him a nod. "I'll take Madi to a room so she can sleep properly. Let me know if she wakes up." I limp towards Madi and quickly pick her up. Resting her head on my shoulder as I carry her to the room with the cot. As I begin to set her down she begins to blink her eyes open. "I'm sorry, I was just moving you so you could be more comfort- "she cut me off when she wraps her arms around my neck in a big embrace. I could feel her crying on my shoulder as she hugged me. As I realized she was crying I wrapped my arms around her as well. It reminded me of when Octavia would cry on my shoulder when she was Madi's age.

"I'm glad you're okay," Madi let out as she pulled away. "I'm sorry for that, it's just Clarke told me you were family and seeing you and her both hurt… it just felt like I was going to be alone again."

I wiped away her tears as she sat in front of me. "I want you to know as long as any of us are here, you will NEVER be alone. We are all family, but I promise you I will be here fighting for you as long as I can." I gave her another quick hug to reassure her. "Now Raven says Clarke will be okay, so why don't you lay down and get some rest okay?"

She gives me a nod as she lays down under the covers that lay on the cot. Within minutes she's asleep again. I pull up a chair at the foot of her cot and rest my face in my hands. I just hope Clarke wakes up soon.


	7. Chapter 7

**Unborn**

 **Madi:**

I woke up to Bellamy moving his head at the foot of my cot. He had spent the whole night watching over me. I couldn't help but smile at how much he has already helped me since he got here. He really was as great as Clarke said.

Clarke. I quickly jump up as I remembered she was still unconscious from her surgery. She had been hit because of me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing she got severely injured because of me. I sneak out of the room making sure that Bellamy doesn't wake up, he needed some proper rest.

The hallway was dark, there was no sign of anyone. I turn to Clarke's door. A shock went through my body as I mentally prepared myself to see her. My hand still on the door handle as I closed my eyes and inhaled. As I begin to exhale and turn the handle to the door I feel a hand on top of my own.

I quickly open my eyes to see Bellamy smiling down at me. "Together."

I smile back as I repeat, "Together." We open the door together. I walked in first as Bellamy followed. Raven was asleep next to Clarke, who still seemed to be out of it. I checked her pulse as she laid there. It was well and strong. As I took my hand away from her neck her eyes began to flutter open.

A large weight came off my shoulders. "Madi? Are you okay?" I can't help but laugh. Even when Clarke almost dies I'm still her number one priority. "Is Bellamy okay? Where is everyone?" Her throat was sore as her voice cracked.

Bellamy stepped forward, he began stroking her hair. Their eyes were locked. Relief filled the room as he bent over to kiss Clarke's forehead. "I'm right here. Don't worry." Tears fell down Clarke's cheeks as she looked back and forth from Bellamy's face to mine. "How about you get some rest and we talk later?"

"Yeah, we just wanted to check on you, you gave us quite the scare." Raven was awake. Her eyes filled with happiness as she saw Clarke awake. Clarke moved her hand to Raven's giving her a nice squeeze.

"Thank you, Raven. Without you," Clarke croaked. Tears continued to pour down Clarke's face. I had never truly seen cry. She cried by herself, but never in front of me. It felt like my heart was growing heavier and heavier as I watched her cry.

"Don't. You saved us too many times for me to have just let you go." Raven's eyes filled with tears, but she held them in as she squeezed Clarke's hand back.

"Clarke, can I sleep with you?" I just needed to be with her. She may not be my real mother, but she was no less than a real mother to me. Almost losing her was too much to bear. Tears burned in my eyes, but I held them in.

"Of course. I'll go get some cots for us," Bellamy said resting his hand on my shoulder. My body relaxed as touched me. I turned around and hugged Bellamy burying my face into his stomach as tears rolled down my cheeks. He pulled me away so he could see my face. "Remember what I told you? We're not going anywhere." He pulled me in for another quick hug before leaving to get the cots, helping Raven out as he left.

"I'm glad you had Bellamy while I couldn't be there for you." A smile crossed Clarke's face, the kind of smile that touched her eyes. She grabbed my hand running her thumb across my knuckles.

"Bellamy is just as amazing as you said he was. They all are." I stared at her taking in every detail of her face. "With them, I feel like our family is complete."

Clarke just stared at me. Her eyes scanning my face. "We have a big family. We fight and we argue, but that's because we love each other and would do anything for each other." Her face relaxed. She looked away going into a deep thought. Whenever Clarke thought of her family she lost herself in her thoughts.

Bellamy opens the door to the room carrying two cots. He sets one on both sides of Clarke. I quickly set up the blankets on top. "What bed would you like Bellamy?"

He gives me a soft smile. "You pick whichever one you want I'm going to go check on everyone once before we go back to sleep." He gives Clarke a small nod before leaving again.

I curl up into the cot next to Clarke. She quickly falls asleep again. I lay there holding her hand taking in everything that has happened within the past few days. According to Clarke things were way worse when they had first come to Earth. We had to fight. Fight for ourselves, fight for our people, fight for our family.

Bellamy:

I left Clarke's room after setting up the cots for Madi and I. I had no idea what time it was and I just wanted to do a check to make sure everything was okay.

First, I opened the door to Murphy and Emori's room, they were cuddled up on one cot fast asleep. At least Murphy was happy, he's less of a pain when he's happy.

Next, I entered Monty and Harper's room. They slept on the ground cuddled up on some sheets.

I entered Raven's room next to see if she had gone to sleep yet but I heard her snoring so I quickly left. She deserved some rest. She carried the most weight out of us all.

I leave turning towards Echo's room. I rest my hand on the handle hesitantly. Echo and I had a complicated relationship. On the ground, all she ever wanted to do was kill me, but as we went to space all of that changed.

I cracked the door open to see that the lights were on. "Echo? Are you awake?"

She pulled the door open. "What do you want Bellamy?" Her eyes were filled with anger. But I completely understood why she wouldn't want to talk to me. "What? Clarke's asleep so you need someone to pass some time?" Her voice was nearly shaking as her hands began to turn into fists at her side.

I looked down at my feet trying to avoid eye contact. I didn't know what to say. I wasn't fair to her. She didn't deserve to be used the way I used her. I was filled with regret. "I'm sorry Echo. I didn't know any of this would happen."

"I knew you loved her, but I was still there for you. In every way, possible." Her voice began to crack. Tears puddled in her eyes. "I loved you, Bellamy." Her tears slowly began falling down her cheeks. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I didn't want to do this to her. I step closer to Echo trying to wipe away her tears, but she pulls away from me. "I loved you almost as much as I loved our child." The wind was knocked out of me.

 **-Flashback-**

I was filled with so much regret and anger. How could I let the woman I love die? I was weak. I could have saved her. We were supposed to be here. Together. I continued drinking Monty's moonshine. He had cut me off in the bar, but little did he know I had a secret stash in my room. Clarke's cell.

I stumbled around the ark. I didn't want to be alone anymore. I found myself in Echo's room. I stood in the doorway staring at her as she changed her clothes. I was looking at Echo, but my blurred vision drew out Clarke. It felt so real. As she turned around Clarke's face was all I saw.

I took a few steps closer. Slowly kissing her. "Stop Bellamy, you're drunk," she says pushing me away. I tilt my head to one side trying to look at her, but my vision is blurred.

"Are you judging me?" I let out a hiccup as I move closer. "You know I want you." I move my hands to her waist. She takes me in and I quickly lay her down. Kissing every inch of her.

The rest of the night really just turned into one big blur. I wake up in Echo's room, my head is pounding as I try to get up. I was defeated by my aching body. I had no idea why I was in Echo's room. I just remember having a dream of being with Clarke. It was one of the most vivid dreams I had ever had of her.

I roll over to find Echo sleeping next to me. She was wearing my shirt. A shock went through my body as I jumped up. No. No. No. No. I couldn't. Did I? I hope not. But I did. I look around to see the rest of our clothes scattered across the floor.

"Where are you going?" Echo rolled over looking at me. Her eyes meeting mine as she moved her hand up to rub them.

I quickly put my pants on. "I'm sorry Echo, that shouldn't have happened." I had to tell her that wasn't real. I had to tell her I was just dreaming over Clarke while I was with her. But I couldn't. That would break her.

"I know you loved her, but you can't spend the rest of your life alone because you regret not saving her." She looked genuine. "You deserve to be happy. She wouldn't have wanted you to be this way."

I turned around as I put on my shoes. I didn't know what to say so I quickly walked out. A million thoughts crossed my mind. Maybe I could be happy. Maybe this could be something. Maybe it was time. Thoughts of Gina flashed through my head. I got with Gina when Clarke had left me, but as I got Clarke back Gina was gone. I was no good for anyone. I was better off alone, incapable of hurting anyone.

A few months pass very slowly. We're trying to figure out how we're going to manage to live for the next few years and how we're going to get back to Earth. The days blend into one another, I've never felt so alone. Monty had Harper, Murphy had Emori, even Raven and Echo had a good relationship with one another. I had managed to push everyone away.

I sat at the edge of my bed with my hands resting in my hands. I don't know how long I'll last at this rate. Would I ever make it back to Earth? I'm interrupted as I hear a knock on my door.

Echo stood in my doorway her arms laid across her stomach. "Can I talk to you?"

I nod patting a spot next to me. She walked in and took a seat next to me. She looked down at her hands fidgeting with her fingers. She completely avoided eye contact. This was unusual considering Echo always carried herself confidently, unbothered by anything and everything. But clearly, the Ark was changing her too. "Is everything okay?"

She finally moved her eyes up to meet mine. They were filled with fear. "I'm pregnant Bellamy." My body went numb as I stared at her, my eyes wide. I kept staring for what felt like an eternity. I didn't know what to say. Maybe this was good for me? Maybe a baby would pull me out of my misery?

I exhale, not realizing I was holding my breath. I rest my hand on hers. "Okay, everything will be okay. Don't worry. We'll figure out how we're going to prepare everything." I force a smile to match hers.

Her smile touched her eyes. She moves forward to wrap her arms around me. I remained calm until she walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her. Tears fell down my cheeks as I thought about what these next few months would be like, what being a father would be like. Would I be able to handle a baby? Would I be able to be there for Echo? Could I love her the way I loved Clarke? I had to. This baby was coming and that's the only thing I was certain of.

A few months pass by Echo's belly is getting bigger. The plan for Echo's delivery was ready, we had a few months to actually put it into action but that was okay. I was starting to appreciate Echo's presence in my life. She had changed a lot since we got onto the Ark. I started sleeping in her room since she didn't want to sleep in Clarke's old cell anymore. I needed to be there in case she felt sick. She was going to be the mother of my child so I needed to take care of her.

One night I walked into our room to find Echo laying on the floor. She was surrounded by blood. I yell for someone to help me as I pick her up and place her on the bed. I check her to see where the blood was coming from. There was no physical wound which left only one other possibility.

I stood above her trying to catch my breath as Raven and Harper stormed the room. Monty pulled me out of the room as Raven and Harper took over. This couldn't be happening. I tried to catch my breath outside.

"It's okay. Everything is going to be okay." Monty patted my shoulder as I bent over trying to breathe.

Raven opened the door revealing Echo's sobs. She gave me a sad nod before I pushed through to see Echo. She was hysterically crying. We had lost the baby. I didn't know what to say so I sat next to Echo and rubbed her head until she fell asleep.

 **-Back to Present Day-**

Everything good in my life always found a way of leaving. On the Ark, I had first lost my mother and later I lost my own child. On Earth, I took many more losses. It was as if everything I touched deteriorated in front of me.

"We lost our baby and all you did was push me away when I needed you." Echo turned around leaving me standing in front of the door.

A sob fills the room. But this sob wasn't coming from Echo. I turned around to find Clarke standing in the doorway. Her eyes filled with anger and pain. I felt frozen as I watched her walk away. She didn't understand. I didn't even get the chance to tell her. I really did destroy everything I touched.


	8. Chapter 8

**Strength**

 **Clarke:**

I wake up to Madi's snoring, she was clearly still exhausted. But could I blame her for everything she's had to face these past few days? After spending the past 6 years without so much as a fight for food she was very unprepared for all of this. Of course, I told her stories about what it was like before but I would never have imagined we'd go back right to where we were before Praimfaya. Fighting for our lives.

My body is heavy, filled with pain. I try to wiggle around to find a comfortable position but nothing helps. I notice Madi's hand tightly holding mine. I brush some hair out of her face and lean down to kiss her.

I look around the dark room to find Bellamy hadn't come back yet. I couldn't have sleeping long if he was still checking on everyone. I slip out of bed being extremely careful not to wake up Madi. I slowly made my way to the door, the pain of surgery slowed me down. I probably shouldn't be walking around, but I had to see Bellamy. He too was injured and should be resting.

I slip out of the room slowly walking through the hall checking each room to see if Bellamy was in any of them. I guess I was also checking to see if everyone else was okay as well. We fought way too long and hard for us to lose anyone now. We were too stubborn to die.

I continue walking down the hall until I find a door open with the light on. Voices murmured in a distance. I slowly made my way down to the door. Bellamy was standing with his back to the door talking to Echo whose eyes were focused on Bellamy, her hands balled up in fists. The room was filled with tension.

Just as I stepped forward to place my hand on Bellamy's shoulder Echo's voice cracks as she yells. "We lost our baby and all you did was push me away when I needed you." Pain took over my body. This pain was different though, it started in my chest and spread like wildfire.

Tears rushed down my cheeks uncontrollably as I let out a small sob. Why didn't he tell me? The fire burned within me as Bellamy turned to look at me. His face was tense but full of regret. He tilted his head his eyes full of tears. It was the same look he gave me when I was leaving after Mount Weather.

Without any further thought, I walked away, I just needed to breathe. I just needed to reevaluate this. I needed to cry a bit alone. All the rooms were occupied so I decided some fresh air would be good to clear my mind. I walk towards the stairs of the bunker. Before I walk up the stairs I grab my rifle, I couldn't risk going out without protection. As I place my hand on the door hesitantly I open it.

My face was met with the fresh cool night air. I took a few steps forward. I felt like I couldn't breathe, even with all the fresh air my body was incapable of processing it all. I bend over placing my hands on my knees trying to catch my breath. This was all too much to process. I stood up and walked over to a tree, leaning my back against it as I slowly got down to sit.

Why didn't he tell me? Maybe he wanted to forget the situation altogether. Maybe he regretted it all. Maybe he didn't trust me. Maybe things really had changed between them. Maybe Echo was his confidant now. He did spend 6 years with her. That's more than enough time for a change in their relationship.

Why had I been so foolish to think that Bellamy didn't have any relationship with Echo or Raven? Why had I been so stupid to believe he would have waited for me? He knew I was alive. He knew I radioed him every day. He knew I loved him. But that wasn't enough for him. He had needs, that clearly Echo was enough to meet. He didn't care.

I took a deep breath, well maybe Lexa was right. Maybe love is a weakness. Maybe I should just let this go before it consumes me. Maybe I should focus on what's most important right now. The new sky people. My mom in the bunker. Trying to come up with a plan to find peace and continue on with humanity.

My eyes burned from crying. I got up to get back into the bunker. I couldn't sleep and crying was just a waste of energy. I needed to find out what our next step was and how we would execute it.

As I walked down the stairs into the bunker I found Bellamy at the end. He was carrying a gun, his eyes puffy, and red. His eyes widened as he saw me. I didn't let his staring stop me, I brushed past him as I headed towards Raven's room. "Wait."

I stopped in my tracks but refused to turn around. A chill went down my spine. "I don't have time to wait." I tried to sound as confident as possible but my heart was heavy and all I wanted to do was cry.

"I'm sorry. Please let me explain." His voice was weak. I could sense the regret in his voice. But I needed to focus on what was important right now.

"There's no need to apologize. There are more important things to be worrying about right now." I peeked over my shoulder at Bellamy standing weakly behind me.

I ignored him and continued to walk before he grabbed my wrist pulling me back to face him. He swiftly pinned me against the wall. His face inches from mine. "No. This _IS_ important." I focused my eyes on his. Looking into his big, brown almond eyes always left me speechless. I couldn't pull myself away from him. He moved his face closer to mine, slowly moving down near my ear. "Please."

My body was consumed by goose bumps. Why did he do this to me? Why did I let him? I couldn't help it. I nodded before grabbing his arm and pulling him into Echo's room. Echo had disappeared, but right now I could care less. I moved to sit down on the cot that laid in her room. Bellamy kneeled in front of me.

"I was with Echo before I knew you were alive. And that too was only because I was drunk and my drunk mind thought she was you. I promise you it was just once." His face was tense as he tried to explain everything to me. "I told her as soon as I found out what had happened the next morning that I had regretted the act. She accepted it but a few months later we found out she was pregnant. You know I couldn't have ignored that. I had to be there for her like she was there for me. She put up with me talking about you every day and leaving her to listen to you when you radioed. She grew to be one of my best friends on the Ark." He looked down at his hands, his face filled with sadness. "But when we lost the baby I couldn't live with it. I couldn't look at her the same. I felt like it was all my fault."

I looked down at Bellamy as he sat was kneeling in front of me. I could tell his time on Ark had been much harder than my time on the ground. I lifted his chin up so that his eyes met mine. He needed to know that this wasn't his fault. None of it was. Had I been in his situation I don't know what I would do or if I would be able to live with such a loss. If the roles were reversed would I be able to live with knowing I left Bellamy behind to die? I placed a soft kiss on Bellamy's lips before I pulled him into an embrace.

"It's okay. I don't blame you." I kissed the top of his head. "I'm sorry."

He pulled way to have his eyes meet mine. His brows furrowed. "You have nothing to be sorry for, this is all my fault." His head dropped once again. "I destroy everything I touch."

My blood rushed with anger. How could he say this about himself? How could he think that? He's done so much to help everyone except himself. He was the most selfless person I had ever met. I grip both of his shoulders with both hands and give him a good shake. "Don't. Don't ever say that Bellamy Blake." His face was full of surprise. "You are the most selfless person I've ever met. You have always put everyone else first. We've both done things we aren't proud of, but that's a part of life." I feel his body relax under my hands, his face still hanging low. "You stepped up to help Echo, you were there for her. It's not your fault you couldn't have done anything to prevent it. I don't know if I could have made it through half the things you have gone through."

Bellamy looks up and kisses me. I get lost in his kiss. It's like he took away all my pain. I wasn't sure of much, but one thing I knew was that I could get through anything with Bellamy Blake by my side. He completed me in a way that no one else could compare.

 **Madi:**

"Madi, wake up my little Nightblood." I groan as I'm being shaken awake. I open my eyes to Clarke standing above me.

I instantly jump up as I see her standing. "How are you feeling? Shouldn't you be resting?" I hear Bellamy laughing from behind me. I quickly turn to give him a questioning stare. He just stands there smiling at me. "What's so funny?"

"It's just, you remind me of Clarke when we first came down to Earth. Concerned and a little bossy." He continued to laugh. "It's not a bad thing I promise. Clarke has always been amazing and strong. We would have died a long time ago if it weren't for her." Clarke just stood by me smiling.

"It's funny because Clarke used to tell me the same things about you." I looked back and forth from Clarke to Bellamy, both who were smiling more than usual.

"Well, we've got a lot of work to do today Madi and you still have a lot to learn." Clarke wrapped her arm around my shoulders. I turned and hugged her. It felt amazing to wrap my arms around her especially after I had almost lost her.

I couldn't control my emotions as she tightened her hold on me. "I almost lost you," I croaked through my sobs. I felt my body start shaking.

Clarke kissed the top of my head. "I would do anything to protect you Madi." She gave me a nice reassuring squeeze. I could feel another set of arms wrap around Clarke and I. But these strong arms could only belong to Bellamy as he was the one person to complete our family. "Now let's go and come up with a plan to get our people out of that bunker."

We all quickly pulled away from our hug. Clarke turned on her heels heading out the door followed by Bellamy. I followed them both out the door and into another. Everyone sat around the room their faces eager to see what plan Clarke and Bellamy had come up with.

I looked around the room for a place to sit. Murphy scooted Emori over, making room for me and quickly patted next to him. "You can sit next to me Madi." A smile crossed his face. I quickly moved across the room to sit next to him.

Clarke had told me stories about Murphy and had told me all the bad things he had done, but it's clear that he wasn't the same person anymore. He had cared for me when Clarke and Bellamy couldn't. They were all there for me.

"Okay, so we all know that we have a lot to do. We need to figure out how we're going to break into the bunker and we need to figure out how we're going to approach these foreigners. Now we don't know how many people they have or what type of weapons or technology they may be carrying so it's important we break out the rest of our people from the bunker first. The bunker is about a day away from here by foot, so assuming there's no one tracking us from the ship we can get there and evaluate our situation." Clarke spoke with confidence. She was a natural leader. She seemed much different than she had been when it was just the two of us. She was more vulnerable then. But this was no time to be vulnerable.

Bellamy cleared his throat as he stepped forward. "We still have all of our weapons and enough food to last us a week. We will take some more supplies from here, maybe a few cots and blankets. There are a few tents as well. We can take that to Polis so that if we figure something out to dig through the rubble we won't need to waste time coming back to gather supplies. While we're there we will need to keep our guard up. We cannot remain vulnerable to another attack. We don't know what these people are capable of so if you see someone shoot without hesitation, but do not shoot to kill unless it is found necessary. Same goes for you Echo. Do not kill them."

Bellamy looked down to Clarke as he finished. They gave each other a nod. Clarke continued, "Once we get our people out we'll all decide what to do with these people. Having an army as large as ours will surely instill fear and intimidation in our enemies."

I looked around the room to find everyone nodding in agreement, Raven's face looked confused. "What if they do end up attacking us all? Do we have enough ammo to defend ourselves?"

"If we get out of the bunker and to Polis it's a clear pass if those people are coming we'll know. I'll stand guard with a radio to warn you if we're under attack," I spoke up. Everyone's eyes shot to me. Clarke gave me a firm nod. I could tell she wouldn't approve of me waiting in the front for an attack, but she knew I was right.

"Okay, I can fix the radio in the Rover so you can use that while we get to work," Raven reassured.

"Let's get our stuff and get ready to leave. We can't waste any more time than we already have," Bellamy commanded. Everyone quickly got up and got to work. It's true the last time we left our guard down and relaxed these people took over our entire home. It's important we don't let that happen again.

I got up to join the rest of the group when Bellamy grabbed my wrist from behind. Clarke stood behind him her arms crossed across her chest. "We'll let you stand guard as long as Echo stays with you. We can't let you stay there alone. We can't risk losing you again," Bellamy said as he rested his hand on my shoulder. "But you need to be fully alert at all times. Like I said we don't know what these people are capable of."

I nodded in agreement. "I promise this time I'll be on my toes and I'll make sure I keep you updated. If I see anyone heading in our direction then I'll turn the Rover around and come get you." Bellamy pulled me in for another hug, rubbing my hair as he hugged me tightly.

Once Bellamy let go Clarke grabbed me and pulled me in for a hug. Kissing the top of my head. "You just have no idea what we went through when we thought we lost you." All the blood rushed to my face as I felt stood there in Clarke's arms. "Now let's go we've got some people to save."


	9. Chapter 9

**Unsteady**

 **Bellamy:**

We all quickly loaded up the Rover with food and supplies we may need. Considering these new sky people were unpredictable our best chance of surviving was to keep everything we may need close. I closed the back door to the Rover as everyone got seated in the back. It was getting cramped in the back, but we made enough room for everyone to sit.

As I take a seat in the driver's seat I take one last look around to make sure the coast was clear. "Monty, Harper stand out the sunroof with your guns hot we don't want any issues." I turned to look at Clarke who had her eyes focused on me. Her face was soft as she gave me a nice smile. I pulled out slowly listening to Clarke as she gave me directions towards Polis.

As there was no sign of any people Monty and Harper joined the others in the back. Everyone was on their toes after what had happened back at the lab no one wanted to take any chances even if everything seemed fine.

I glanced over at Clarke who was staring out the window. The light was shining on her golden hair making her glow more than usual. The streaks of red only adding to her beauty. I quickly looked away as she began to turn her head, but she caught me. "Eyes on the road Bellamy." She grinned at me. It was a relief to see her smile, she looked breathtaking when she smiled.

I smirked back at her. "I've got my eyes on what matters." Her round cheeks began to turn pink as she blushed. She turned her face away so I couldn't see her, but I knew she was still blushing. "Is this brave princess blushing?" I mocked.

She turned back swiftly hitting me in the arm as she let out a laugh. She always knew how to make me smile. Even when I hated her she was the only person other than Octavia capable of making me smile. But I guess that's what made her stand out from the rest of the 100. She was different.

Eventually, everyone fell asleep except Clarke and I. So, to pass the time Clarke began telling me stories of life after Praimfaya.

"Well, you would think that surviving is great but when you're alone you really just start to feel like you're losing your mind. It's like you can do whatever the hell you want, but what's the point of doing whatever the hell you want if you can't enjoy doing it with anyone. Obviously, once I found Madi she began to keep me sane, but before that, I could slowly feel myself going crazy." Her eyes were wide as she talked about what it felt like to be alone. Although, I had been with 6 other people I felt like I could relate to her because even when we were altogether without her I felt like I _WAS_ alone.

"I owe Madi my life. She's been my world for the past 6 years and I don't think I would have made it without her. She really just gave me the will to live. I had no contact with anyone from the bunker and I didn't have any communication with the Ark it did take a large toll on me." She turned to look out the window. She was hiding her tears, but I let her. She didn't want to feel weak. "But it wasn't all bad, once Madi came into the picture we really got to look into everything. We found a few hidden bunkers and places with old supplies. It was convenient. Madi and I fixed the Rover. We really just got to explore the world without anyone getting in our way. It was beautiful, but there was always a part of me that wished I could do this with you."

I looked over at her meeting her cool blue eyes. I placed my hand on her thigh caressing the outside of it with my thumb. Her body instantly relaxed as I touched her. I couldn't help but smile at the thought. I was the only one who could instantly relax her.

"What was it like on the Ark? You got to know for the most part what it was like down here, but I don't know much about what you did up there." Clarke's eyes were filled with curiosity.

"Well, Monty made moonshine almost immediately so for the first few days that's all I really had. Well, actually that's all I had until you began to radio us." Her face fell I could tell she was disappointed. "In my defense, though there wasn't much to do other than drink, eat, and sleep. I wasn't much help up there. Sometimes I felt like I just dragged everyone down. Like I was just a burden. But Monty, Raven, and Echo really kept me going. Monty and Raven helped me realize how stupid I was being. Echo helped me realize why I was being so stupid. I spent so many months regretting everything I had said and done, everything I hadn't said and hadn't done. But that's why once I knew you were alive I had all the motivation I needed to fight."

I looked over to see Clarke's head tilted to one side, questioning me. I couldn't help but let out a laugh as I looked at her. "What?"

"It's just when I talk about how much I hated myself and how I felt like everything was my fault you don't judge me at all, but when I tell you that your radio entries kept me going you doubt yourself."

I gave her thigh a nice squeeze as I looked over to flash her a quick smile. "I've hurt you a lot, Bellamy. I've hurt everyone a lot. I don't deserve you." She looked down at her hands and then turning her head towards the window.

I move my hand to her waist, tickling her so she would look back at me. "You can try to push me away, but I already promised Madi that we would be one big happy family. And how would be a happy family without _YOU_?" I didn't need to look at Clarke to know she was smiling. Her lack of a response made it even more clear.

"How long until we get there?" Madi chimed in as we began to fall silent.

"We're almost there, we already passed the tree line so it's not far from here," Clarke responded.

Madi moved forward and leaned her head against Clarke's seat. "Do you really think we're going to get everyone out of the bunker?" Her voice sounded hesitant as if she was scared to ask. I looked over my shoulder at her. Her eyes were wide but curious.

"I don't know, but we have to try." I couldn't live with myself if I didn't give it my all to try to get my sister out. I hope she's okay.

As if reading my thoughts Clarke leaned over and put her hand on mine. "Octavia is a fighter, I'm sure she's fine. We _WILL_ get them out." I felt better knowing that Clarke was just as determined to get them out as I was. We didn't always agree on what we wanted to do, but we both only ever shared our people's best interest at heart.

We pulled up to what looked like a wasteland. Everything that Polis ever stood for was gone with nothing but broken buildings left behind. Everything was gone. I felt a kick in my chest as I thought about all the people that had once populated this city.

 **Clarke:**

I hated coming here, we'd come here many times when we were alone to try to move some of the rubble but it only ever felt hopeless. But now I had hope.

Raven got out of the back moving past me, turning around as she took in her surroundings. "So where do we start?" I walked up towards the hill of rubble that covered the bunker.

I moved up to stand on top of it. "This is what we need to move to get to our people." Tension filled the air as they took in the large pile we had to get through.

Bellamy stepped forward moving some rubble out of the way as he looked around. "I have to say we've had to do worse things than to dig through some rubble." He stood with his head held high, confidence beaming from him. I couldn't help but admire his hope. "Between the 9 of us, we can make this happen. This is our best bet if we want to survive."

I moved down from the hill looking around at everyone. We had to organize our labor in some way if we wanted to be productive. "Madi, Raven you two are on guard duty. You'll take the Rover towards the tree line and you can warn us if anyone is coming. Raven while you're there see if you can fix the radio so we can communicate with anyone from inside the bunker." Madi and Raven both nodded at one another before they stepped back towards the Rover taking out what may help us.

"Echo, Emori you two will look through some of the surrounding rubble if you can find any type of tools to help us cut through this faster." The two former grounders both turned on their heels to help Raven and Madi.

"Harper, Monty, Murphy, Bellamy the rest of us are going to pick at the rubble. Monty, Murphy, Bellamy you two will work together to pick up anything too big for one person. Harper and I will pick the smaller pieces." Everyone nodded in unison.

Everyone went on to start their work. I walked to Madi and Raven as they were getting ready to leave. I pulled Madi in for a tight hug. "Be careful out there. We'll keep you updated on our progress. Once the sun begins to set make your way back to us so we can find a good place to set up camp."

Madi shook her head. "Okay, okay we get it, Clarke, we'll be careful." I knew I was smothering her, but after almost losing her last time I felt extra cautious. I reached back at her and gave her a nice kiss.

Bellamy walked up to Madi probably telling her to be careful. I just looked at them from the other end of the Rover. It was nice to know that even if I couldn't always be there for Madi that she would have Bellamy. Bellamy helped Madi get into the Rover and all I could do was stand and watch them drive away.

I was pulled from my thoughts as Bellamy walked in front of me. "Time to get to work." I quickly turned around to join the others.

We worked for what felt like days. Emori and Echo found some long rods hidden under some rubble that we used to sweep out pieces of rubble. Eventually, they joined us in our efforts to get to the bunker. Every hour or so Raven radioed in to update us on her progress with contacting the bunker. Nothing.

It felt hopeless. The sun began to set and we still weren't even halfway through. Everyone was exhausted. We decided it would be best if we moved out of this dead zone to set up camp. We drove up to a river about 10 minutes away.

Everyone slowly got out of the Rover, clearly exhausted from all the work we had done. Harper, Raven, Echo, Emori, and I set up the tents. Madi pulled out the cots for everyone. Murphy and Bellamy went hunting for food. Monty set up a fire in the middle of our camp.

"Madi do you want to sleep with Bellamy and me?" I want her to sleep with us, I feel like if she's with me nothing bad can happen to her without me being there to protect her. I knew I was just overprotective, but she was the closest thing to a daughter I have ever had.

Raven sat on a log next to the fire, heating her hands as she rested her elbows on her legs. "You can sleep with me if you want." I can't say I wasn't surprised. Raven had come to be very close to Madi.

Madi tilted her head looking at the fire. The flames of the fire brought out the green in her eyes. She reminded me so much of Octavia with her dark hair and green eyes. "It's okay I'll sleep with Raven tonight." I sat and joined her on the log, she leaned her head on my shoulder. We all sat around the fire as we waited for Bellamy and Murphy to come back.

Eventually, Raven stood up and walked towards the Rover. I let her go alone since Madi had fallen asleep on my shoulder. "Bellamy, where are you?" I listened for a response, but nothing but static came back. "Murphy, do you read?" There was still static.

Fear filled my body as several scenarios filled my head as to what could have happened to them. I relaxed. They had guns. They were fully equipped to get some food. There was no way they wouldn't have told us if they were under attack.

"Bellamy! Murphy! DO YOU READ?" Raven's voice was nearly shaking. Suddenly I'm shaken by a large explosion in the distance. My entire body froze as everyone around me got up and began packing everything. It was as if my entire body went into shock. "WE NEED TO GO NOW." Raven was standing in front of me, her hands gripped around my shoulders.

I jumped up picking up Madi and getting her into the back of the Rover. I threw some water on our fire before jumping into the passenger's seat in the front. "You don't think that's them? Do you?" Raven kept her eyes aware looking around for any sign of Bellamy and Murphy. Her hands tightly gripping the steering wheel. Monty and Harper stood out the top ready to open fire. I picked up a gun from the back seat as I opened the window.

If someone was going to attack I was going to take them down. No hesitation. If they had Bellamy I would show no mercy.

"If they have John, I swear." Emori also grabbing a gun ready to go out and put up a fight. She loved Murphy the way I loved Bellamy. She was going to fight for him.

A crack comes across the radio. "Clarke! Clarke! Are you there?" Murphy's voice echoed within the Rover. I picked up the radio.

His voice was full of fear. "Yes Murphy, where are you? Are you okay? Where's Bellamy?"

"They got him." He began to sob hysterically. "I tried to help him, but there was too many of them. He told me to run. He told me not to come after him until we had our people." He took a deep breath. "I-I'm sorry I couldn't save him." My body became numb.

"Where are you? We're coming for you." Why did I let them go alone? I should have been there. I should have helped him.

Murphy spits out his coordinates on the radio talking about what had happened but I was too lost in my thoughts to hear him. I let this happen. Bellamy was taken because of me. This time we couldn't just kill everyone and take him.

We picked up Murphy and headed back to where we had set up camp. Murphy estimated about 50 people all dressed the same. Loaded with guns and some homemade bombs. It was usually Bellamy who came to save me. He always came up with the rescue plans. He always executed them. He was the true leader. How was I going to do this without him?


	10. Chapter 10

**Explosives**

 **Bellamy:**

We worked all day, but it felt hopeless. We barely made any progress. We still didn't have any word from the bunker. We definitely didn't know what these people were capable of.

We arrived at a river not far from Polis and immediately began to set up camp. It was nice knowing that even though the rest of the world was destroyed some areas were still the same.

"How about you guys finish setting up while Murphy and I go get us some food?" If we wanted to go back and make some progress on the rubble we needed to eat and sleep well. It had been so long since I'd been hunting. Since we got here Clarke had provided all the food.

Clarke turned around scanning the surroundings. Clearly still worried about any threats. "Should I come with you?" She tilted her head to one side. As much as I wanted to say yes, I couldn't.

"No one of us needs to be here." I could see the pain in her eyes, but she quickly pushed it away. She nodded getting ready to turn away, I quickly grabbed her wrist pulling her into me. "I'll be back soon," I whispered into her ear.

She pulled away shooting me a small smile. I turned towards Murphy who had his arms draped around Emori. I cleared my throat, signaling that it was time to go. We grabbed some guns and ammo, turning to take off into the forest.

We slowly made our way across the forest floor. Murphy had changed so much since we last left Earth. Maybe it was because his life didn't revolve around surviving anymore. He actually had time to be a human being. We had our differences while we were on Earth, but that was all left behind when we got back on the Ark. All of our relationships changed. We became very close, but that happens when you spend enough time with the same group of people. We faced many ups and downs together. We became a family.

"How long do you think it'll take until we get into the bunker?" Murphy asked pulling me from my thoughts.

"I wish I knew. We need something to make this process go faster because at the rate we're going it'll take weeks." Weeks that we couldn't risk remaining so vulnerable. There was no chance that they wouldn't come after us, especially since we hurt so many of their people. When the grounders attacked Jasper, we were fully prepared to kill anyone that came in our way.

We walked around for hours with no sign of life coming from any direction. It was quiet. Too quiet.

Suddenly it hit me. I stopped in my tracks as Murphy ran into me from behind. We weren't hunting at all, we were being hunted. I slowly turned around, taking in my surroundings. Looking for any tracks. Nothing.

"Run," I whispered to Murphy as I tried to keep my cool, not giving anything away. My eyes were piercing Murphy trying to get him to understand.

"Why?" He stared at me his face filled with confusion.

I grabbed his shoulders. "Listen to me, we need to run." I paused making sure he understood what I meant. "I'll run this way, you run that way. Don't run directly to camp." He gave me a nod. I handed him the radio. "I'll try to give you enough time to get away, take the radio and don't come after me. Get to the bunker first." He opened his mouth to question me, but I turned around and began running before he could.

I turned around running deeper into the forest. Soon I heard footsteps coming behind me. I didn't turn to look I just ran faster. My legs went numb as I kept running. I could hear Murphy yelling from a distance, but I couldn't make out the words. The blood pounding in my ears made it difficult to hear anything other than my heavy breathing.

I caught sight of someone running my way in a distance, I quickly turned hoping I'd lose them as I quickly turned corners. My vision began to go dark as my body hit a level of exhaustion I hadn't encountered. Hopefully, Murphy got away, if one of us was going to get away I needed to make this last. I cut around trees, running in zig zags. I heard gunshots coming from behind me, but that didn't stop me.

I keep running until suddenly a burning sensation fills my body. A large explosive goes off not far from me. I could feel my body fly weightlessly in the air. My body flew straight into a tree. My body quickly filled with pain. A paralyzing pain. My vision became blurry. All I could see were blobs of people surrounding me lifting me onto what felt like a gurney. My arms and legs were quickly strapped down.

As they took me away all I could do was hope that everyone else got away in time. Slowly I could feel myself slip into darkness.

 **Clarke:**

"We have to go after him. We can't just let them take him." I could feel my body shaking as the anger filled my body.

Raven tightened her grip on the steering wheel. "No Clarke, Bellamy doesn't want that. If we go after him we could all die. As long as they have him they won't come after us. That gives us enough time to break everyone out." She was right. We couldn't let Bellamy's sacrifice go to waste. He knew what he was getting into, this was a part of his plan. When did he become the head to my heart? The roles really did change, but I needed to be both if I wanted to get him out.

"Okay. Do you think we can put together anything to move the rubble out faster?" Innovation was always Raven's thing and I'm sure she had a better idea of what to do than I did. We needed to get our people out before it was too late. I can't lose Bellamy again.

"Well, Monty and I were talking and we think burning through the rubble will be faster than trying to move it. If we create a little bomb it'll clear out the big chunks, followed by a fire to take out the smaller bits and pieces." I looked at her face, full of confidence. If anyone could save us, it would be Raven Reyes.

"Can you make a few spare bombs? It's clear these people have weapons and we need to be prepared to fight back." Madi leaned forward, her face wet from crying. I grabbed her hand and gave her a small smile. She laid her head on my lap as I caressed her hair.

"I can make a few. But we'll have to use them wisely." I laid my head back against the wall of the Rover. Silence filled the air. Murphy was laying in Emori's lap. Harper was leaning against Monty.

Emori reached her hand out placing it on my shoulder. "We'll get him back Clarke." I nodded at her, holding back my tears.

Soon we reached the river again. We decided it was best if we had two people on guard while the rest slept.

"I'll stand guard. I won't be able to sleep much anyway." I leaned over into the back of the Rover grabbing a gun, tucking small knives into my clothes just to be safe.

Monty walked up behind me placing a hand on my shoulder. "You don't have to do this. I can stand guard." I shook my head as I moved up on top of the hood of the Rover.

Echo decided to stand guard with me. I couldn't help but think if she was as concerned as I was. "You know you can come sit up here with me." She turned to look at me, but her eyes never met mine. It was as if she was deep in thought. "I miss him too."

She moved up hesitant to make eye contact with me. "You know he saved my life." She took a deep breath. "Before Praimfaya I was going to take my own life, but he saved me." I leaned forward placing my hand on hers. Her face fell as she reminisced about the past 6 years of her life. "I owe my life to him."

I gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm sorry Echo." I didn't have anything to truly apologize for, but I was sorry. "I know what it feels like to watch someone you love, love someone else." A single tear flowed down Echo's cheek, she quickly wiped it away with her free hand. She tightened her grip of my hand.

We quickly jumped up as we heard footsteps coming from behind, but it was only Raven. Her face filled with exhaustion. Echo and I silently move over so Raven could join us on the hood. Everyone else seemed to be fast asleep.

She makes her way onto the hood silently tilting her head up to look at the sky. I reach over grabbing Raven's hand. "Thank you." I tilted my head back mimicking her position.

"Thank me when we get our people out of that hole." She sat up looking over at me, her eyes bright with inspiration. "I think I know how to make our bomb." She hopped off the hood and moved to the back.

I quickly jumped after her, my gun draped across my chest. Raven created a mixture in an old tin can, similar to the one she had used to blow up the bridge. She held it carefully in front of her eyeing it carefully. "I got it." A smile spread across her face as she carefully pulled the can closer to her. "We should try it now. The sooner we use it, the sooner we get to our people." I looked around at everyone sleeping, but I nodded in agreement.

"Let me wake everyone up first, the last thing we need is for everyone to wake up thinking we're under attack." Echo and I turn towards the camp to wake everyone.

I sit on the side of Madi's cot slowly nudging her. "Wake up my little Nightblood. We have work to do." Madi shifted in her cot still trying to hold on to the depth of her sleep. As soon as she realized where she was she jumped up, her soft green eyes meeting mine.

"What happened? Are we going to get Bellamy?" I could see a sadness fill her eyes as I shook my head. She let out a sigh as her face fell.

I pulled her in for a hug, running my fingers through her soft hair. "We _WILL_ get him back," I whispered in her ear. She tightened her grip around me.

We slowly pull away as everyone is up and ready to get to work. Quickly packing up our tents and cots, we all pack into the Rover. I gently pull out as Raven gently grips the can next to me. If the explosion is too small, we'll still have a lot of work to do. If the explosion is too big someone can get severely injured.

I carefully escorted Raven out of the car once we reached Polis. We didn't want to waste any of our explosive material by being careless. "Okay, I set it down on top of the hill. We should move out to the other end just to be safe."

Once we were a safe distance away we all awaited as Raven set up her target. We were safe, but the idea of anything happening to anyone in the bunker made me nervous. I turned my back to Raven, I was too nervous to watch.

As she hit the target surely there was an explosion. This explosion was unlike I had ever heard. It sounded like a loud scream echoing throughout the wasteland. Scraps flew around landing everywhere. No one said anything. Silence filled the air. I couldn't get myself to turn around. I just stared aimlessly in a distance hoping everything was okay.

Eventually, I found the courage to turn around. Everyone was staring at the fire that was left behind. Mesmerized by the damage this small can had done. Smoke and flames filled the air, but no one moved. We just stood to wait for things to clear out.

All I could do was hope that the rubble was cleared. That everything was okay. That no one in the bunker was hurt because of the bomb we set to explode. The memories of Praimfaya haunted me as I stood there watching the flames burn. At least this time I wasn't alone.


	11. Chapter 11

**Strength in Numbers**

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up in a large white room. A bright light placed right above me, burning into my eyes. I tried to move, but I was tied down. My body was in a pain that echoed throughout me. I couldn't see my injuries but I could feel them.

The restraints dug deep into my skin as I tried to pull away. But soon I relaxed, if I wanted Clarke and everyone else to be okay I had to be here. I had to bear the burden so they didn't have to. I took a deep breath trying to distract myself from the pain coursing through my body.

A loud creek fills the room as a door opens. I can't see anything, but I can feel someone looking at me. A woman in a hazmat suit stood above me. She looked about the same age as Clarke. Dark brown hair, piercing blue eyes. She looked like a porcelain doll. Her eyes focused on me. She stood there staring at me.

I tilted my head to one side as I took in the look in her eyes. Concern? "What do you want from me?"

She slowly moved her gloved hand to my cheek. She caressed my face. "I want your leader. I want to know what you know. I want to know how you survived."

My heart began to beat harder and faster. She wanted Clarke. "I am our leader." I kept my face firm, strong. Hoping she wouldn't find the lack of confidence in my voice. "If that's all you wanted, why did you keep us as your prisoners? Why did you try to kidnap one of us? Why did you attack us?"

She let it all sink in. I could see her face fill with curiosity. Her brows furrowed as she continued to scan my face. "We kept you as prisoners so we could test if Earth was survivable by sending you out first. We monitored you all closely to see if you faced any radiation poisoning. You seem to be perfectly fine. We needed to take you so we could test if you had any components in your blood that we didn't." Her eyes were wide. They were hungry. I felt chills go down my spine, she made me feel uncomfortable.

The door opened once again. The woman standing above me jumped as footsteps made their way towards us. The woman stiffened as a man stood next to her. He was older. His hair a mix of grey and black. He looked a lot like the woman, but much older. He stood there grinning down at me.

"Set up the tray, if we want to get anything out of him we're going to need him alive." His voice was dark. I lay there helpless, incapable of defending myself. But I had to get through this for my people, for Clarke.

I spent the next few hours slipping in and out of consciousness as they worked to fix my injuries. Some injuries were worse than others. I felt every move they made. They cut into my stomach trying to repair my internal injuries.

I woke up again when I heard them yelling. "THERE'S A BLEEDER. FIND IT," yelled the woman.

The man frantically stuck his fingers inside my stomach digging through my insides. "I CAN'T FIND IT." His eyes filled with fear. I was vital to their survival, they needed me. "I found it, apply pressure and suction while I stitch it up," he breathed a sigh of relief.

A loud vacuum like noise filled the room as the woman gained control of my bleeding. After the stitches held in tight, they continued to close me up. Both of their faces were filled with relief.

They whipped off their gloves before ripping off their blood covered surgical gowns and their face masks. The woman rushed to wash her hands before she sat up beside me.

She laid her hand on my chest. "We almost lost you, but everything should be fine now. Get some rest for now, we'll come back to check on you later." She gave me a smile before walking away.

I was left alone lying on my bed still bound against the bed. I missed Clarke. It should have been her patching me up. She should have been her patching me up. Getting mad at me for putting myself in such a dangerous situation. Then sitting next to me until I fell asleep, playing with my hair. She would have checked up on me every hour to make sure I wasn't infected, to change my dressings. I needed her. I slowly fell asleep as the pain took over my body.

I abruptly woke up to a bucket of water being splashed against my face. The cool water running down my body. I was sitting up tied to a chair in a prison like room. Ropes ripped into my ankles, knees, arms, and chest. I couldn't move at all.

A man stood in front of me a grin plastered across his face. He was tall, wide shoulders, strong arms. He had dark hair, blue eyes. I sat there scanning my surroundings. My body was numb, I couldn't see beyond the man. My vision was heavily blurred.

"Rise and shine sweetheart!" The man stood in front of me with his arms crossed in front of him, his face full of amusement. "Now tell me Bellamy. How many of you are there?" I sat there remaining quiet. If I stayed quiet long enough he'd give up and leave. "Not going to talk huh?"

I remembered back to when we had taken Lincoln for information, we continued to torture him until he got away. He was much stronger than I am. Even the day he was executed he was fearless.

The man stepped closer to me moving his face in front of mine. His grin washed off his face as it filled with anger. He stepped back letting out a large sigh. His fingers rolled into his palm making a fist. "Okay then, let me give you some motivation." He turned around grabbing a heavy looking paddle. He walked closer as he bounced it against his palm. "Pull him up."

Two men quickly untied me. I didn't resist as they tied me up. My arms were stretched out on both sides as my legs were tied at shoulder width. The pain from the restraints consumed me. This is what we did to Lincoln. My heart filled with regret, but I couldn't show it.

The man took a step back preparing to swing the paddle by placing it over his shoulder. I closed my eyes as I prepared myself. I had to do this. For Clarke. For my sister. For Madi. For my family.

"HOW MANY OF YOU ARE THERE?" I held my breath waiting for it. He swung the paddle back and swung straight to my gut. The sting of the wood against my skin took my breath away. I began to breathe calmly, relaxing my body. I lifted my head back up so my eyes could meet his. I needed to show him I wouldn't break. "Nothing?" He swung back again hitting me in the side. He repeated this over and over again. I took every hit. I had been through worse.

After a few hours of being hit the woman walked in behind him. The man was instantly filled with anger, but he brushed her off dropping the paddle violently before storming out of the cell.

The woman approached me placing her hand on my chest as she looked up at me. I moved my face away trying to avoid eye contact. She lifted my shirt up taking in the new bruises that had formed around my stomach. She glided her fingers along each bruise. My body tensed under her fingers. She ran her fingers up around my face slowly caressing me. I turned my face away avoiding her touch as much as possible.

As she wrapped her hand around my neck before piercing me with a syringe. Instantly everything around me went black.

 **Clarke:**

As the smoke began to clear up and the fire died down the view became clear. The rubble had nearly cleared aside from a few large pieces. We were close. "Monty, Murphy come help me move these pieces." I ran past the remaining fire up to the bunker. Murphy and Monty quickly joining me as I tried to lift some large pieces of cement. We quickly threw the pieces out. This was the moment of truth.

A tear fell down my cheek as I saw the door to the bunker. This was it. This was reality. I took a deep breath, opening the bunker. The lights were flickering. Fear flooded my body. "Everyone get ready. We're about to get our people back."

I quickly climbed down to the bunker, there was no sign of anyone. Just flickering lights. As I walked towards the control room I took in the mess. Papers scattered everywhere with lists and rules. Crumpled up papers all over the floor. I walked up to the intercom. If I made an announcement everyone would be out of the bunker faster.

I picked up the microphone slowly turning it on. A screech came across the speakers. It slowly died out as I tapped the top of it. I cleared my throat before speaking into the microphone. "Hello, if anyone can hear me please walk towards the bunker door. This is Clarke and it's time to bring our people back to where we belong." As I finished my announcement I walked out towards the rooms. Voices grew as I got closer.

Before I knew it, I began running. I ran straight to the infirmary, if I knew my mom at all she would be here. I stood outside the door of the infirmary. I placed my hand on the handle taking in a deep breath when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

Kane. I let the tears flow as I pulled him into an embrace. He looked weaker, his hair was grey. He began shaking as I held him. I swallowed the large lump in my throat. "Where's my mom?"

He pulled away, his eyes not meeting mine. He turned and began walking down the hallway. I followed him as he stopped in front of a door. I looked at him as he stood there. I couldn't wait any longer, I burst through the door. My mom was lying in bed coughing, her eyes widened as she took me in. She was pale, her hair grew grey too, she looked weak. Weaker than Kane. A small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.

"Clarke," she croaked her voice was so small. I couldn't hold back the tears as they ran down my cheeks. I wrapped my arms around her tightly. I hadn't seen my mother in over 6 years. I hadn't realized how much I missed her until I was right in front of her.

"What's wrong?" I couldn't help but wonder how she had come to become so weak. My heart ached. She continued to sob as she shook her head. "Mom. Please." I wiped away her tears pulling her in for another hug.

I pulled away to give her some air. "We were running out of food, she's over worked herself and sacrificed everything to help everyone else." A familiar voice came from around me. I turned around to me rammed by Octavia. She wrapped her arms around me squeezing me as tight as she could. She was also thinner, but clearly, she had still been training. "I guess self-sacrifice is a Griffin thing." A smile spreads across her face.

I turned towards my mother shaking my head, but I understood why she did it. She thought I was gone, she thought this was all her fault, she was overwhelmed. I leaned down kissing her forehead before turning back to Octavia.

"Is Bell here? How is everyone? How did you all make it?" She was filled with curiosity.

I held back the tears burning in my eyes as I shook my head at her. "We need to go get him." I sat her down as I quickly summarized our current situation. I could sense the anger in Octavia as she tried to get up, I pushed her down as I finished explaining the plan. "Now you need to tell me how many people do we have and are they ready to fight?"

Octavia abruptly stood up nodding at a man standing in the doorway. "We'll kill them all if we have to." She was filled with fury.

I turned back to Kane and my mother. "Everything will be okay, you don't need to torture yourself." I smiled. "We've made it." Kane grabbed her hand as tears filled his eyes as he looked between my mom and me. "I need to go and help everyone outside get everything together for everyone trying to get out, but I'll send some people down for you two." I gave my mom a nod as I turned on my heels to walk towards the bunker doors.

The hallways were crowded with familiar faces. As I turn the corner towards the door I see Octavia standing amongst a crowd. Everyone was focused on her. It was nice to see someone else lead for once.

A few hours pass and almost everyone is out of the bunker. The excitement that filled the air was the most beautiful thing I had seen in a while. This was it, we made it this far and we were not going to back down now. We organized everyone into two groups, a group that was going with the search party to get Bellamy and another group that was going to stay back and build up our village.

My mom's voice croaked behind me as she was being carried in on a gurney. I turned to her grabbing her hand. Madi slowly made her way towards me, her face falling as she saw my mom. She was nervous. "Mom, this is my…Madi. She's been with me for the past few years. She's my family." A smiled crossed my mom's face as she stared at Madi.

She opened her arms to let her in for a hug. Relief filled my body. "Clarke has been like a mom to me." Madi was grinning from ear to ear. I tried to fight the tears that pooled up into my eyes, but I couldn't help it. In all the years, we had spent together Madi had never directly referred to me as her mom.

Octavia joined me by my side. "Hi I'm Oct…"

She was cut off by Madi. "Octavia Blake." She wrapped her arms around Octavia catching her off guard. "Clarke has told me so much about you. So much about all of you," she said looking around at everyone.

Octavia couldn't help but smile. Her smile soon faded as she looked around at everyone rejoicing, everyone except her and Bellamy. I grabbed her hand giving her a nice squeeze. "We _WILL_ get him back."

As everyone stood out in the empty wasteland Octavia and I stood on top of the hood of the Rover gathering everyone's attention.

"We made it," Octavia says as everyone cheers. "But our fight is not over. We have a new threat to fight." Everyone looked at one another glances were being passed on. "There are people here who think they can take our land from us. But we are going to show them that we will not go down without a fight."

Cheers filled the air. Everyone was eager to take on our next challenge. I cleared my throat as the cheering died down. "These people have bombs. We need to attack at first light before they use them." The simultaneous nods continued as I continued. "We separated you into groups, half of which will help execute this attack and half of which will help set up camp. For now, we will set camp along the river, tomorrow we will fight." The crowd cheered enthusiastically. It was relaxing to know that we weren't alone anymore.

I drove the injured to the river where we decided we'd stay the night. People were already there making fires, making weapons, setting up places to sleep. It was hard to tell the difference between the previous Grounders and Arkers. We were all one now.

Murphy and Monty set off with a hunting party to get food. We had about little over a thousand people from the bunker. A lot of hungry and eager people to take care of. Everyone was scattered around the river. The cots were reserved for the injured.

As everyone was fed and falling asleep I walked towards Madi and Raven who sat by the fire with Octavia, Miller, Monty, Murphy, Emori, and Echo. It was nice to have everyone together. The thought of Bellamy filled me. I felt so guilty. He was gone because of my carelessness. Who knew what they were doing to him?

Octavia, as if reading my thoughts moved closer to me placing her hand on my knee. "We _WILL_ get him back." She repeated my words from earlier reassuring me of my plan. This had to work. It was the only way I would get him back.


	12. Chapter 12

**Leaders**

 **Bellamy:**

When my sensations came back to me I felt someone's fingers running through my hair. It took the pain away from everything else. I felt like I was home again. I shook my head as I realized I wasn't home. My eyes slowly flickered open, adjusting to the bright light above me.

The porcelain woman froze above me. Her eyes looking deep into mine. I pulled my gaze away from her. I looked around the white room. I was back. "You've been out for quite some time now Bellamy." The woman's voice filled with concern. I was tied down incapable of moving away from her. She continued to run her fingers through my hair, slowly moving down my cheeks, moving to my neck. I squeezed my eyes closed hoping she would stop. I couldn't take it.

The woman's fingers retracted from my neck as I tried to pull away. I opened my eyes again to catch the look on her face. Her face had fallen to look at her fingertips. Her eyes filled with tears. "I hate to see them hurt you." A tear fell from her eye landing on my bare chest. "If you just tell them what they want to hear they'll stop. Just please, say something. Anything." Her gaze shifted up, her eyes locking onto mine. Why did she care if they tortured me? She was one of them.

"If they want peace, this isn't the way to get it." I couldn't hide the irritation in my voice, but I didn't care. Torturing me would get them nowhere. If it was information they wanted, they had to earn it. I would withstand the torture. Or at least die trying.

She stood up, slamming her hands on the table near my bed. "Why must you be so difficult?" Her voice was nearly broken. She was clearly emotional. I couldn't wrap my head around this woman. She made no sense. At least when Octavia tried to help Lincoln it was because he had done something to prove himself to her. I didn't even know this woman.

Her heavy breathing slowly died down as she turned around. Tears falling down her face which she tried to hide with a fake artificial smile.

"Why do you care what they do to me?" Her face-hardened washing away her smile.

"Because... I just do." Her voice cracked as if she was holding back something. I tilted my head to one side trying to figure her out. "Ever since we took you in as prisoners…"

She was cut off by the door being slammed open making her flinch. "You know you can't be in here with him alone!" A man yelled from the doorway. Her face hardened as she looked up at the man.

She turned to face him moving her arms across her chest. "In case you forgot, I have to fix the damage that _you_ people have done." Silence filled the room.

The man stepped forward, standing inches from the porcelain woman. "Get out of here before I take you out myself." The woman stormed out of the room.

The man took the radio hooked to his waist as soon as she left the room. The radio cracked once he turned it on. "Okay sir she's gone."

Within a few seconds a group of men filled the room. The same man who had tortured me with the paddle yesterday stood at the foot of my bed. "Yesterday was just the beginning boy. We have much better things planned for you." Satisfaction in his eyes. I tried to relax my body, preparing for what I had in store. This was a fight of the mind. If I didn't let my pain consume me anything they did to me wouldn't matter.

"Your little lady doctor won't be here to help you now." A small smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. "How many of you are there?" I closed my eyes to prepare myself to be hit with the paddle again, but I'm surprised when my skin is met with a burning sensation on my chest. The burn was isolated, controlled but it was deep. My eyes flickered open. The man was pressing a burning piece of metal against my skin.

I closed my eyes again. This time I looked for something to distract me from my pain. I replayed the best parts of my life. Drowning out the man and his questions. Numbing me from the pain of him burning circles into my chest. Memories of my childhood took me away from my pain. Curled up against my mom in the small bed we shared reading the Iliad. Teaching Octavia all the things I learned in school. Carrying her on my back whenever she wanted me to give her a piggyback ride. Even my time on Earth before Praimfaya flashed through my head. All the time I spent trying to keep myself from ruining my friendship with Clarke. I regretted doing that now. We hadn't had enough time together.

I was pulled from my thoughts when I felt a water splash in my face. The burns on my chest began to sting. The sensation burning through my body. "You can ignore me all you want, but I won't stop until you're in a body bag." The man stood by my side. His expression driven by his anger hardened as his fists grew tighter. "Board him." The man ordered. My face was suddenly covered by a rag followed by a bucket of water. I choked as the water began to fill my mouth.

They continued this for what felt like hours. I lost myself in this cycle of questioning and torture. They switched back and forth between drowning me with water and burning my chest.

Suddenly silence filled the room. It was as if everything froze in time. I relaxed my body throwing my head back, closing my eyes. The only thing echoing throughout the room was my heavy breathing.

The door slammed shut sending a shock throughout the room. "GET. OUT." The porcelain woman's voice filled the room. The man stepped forward to argue, but was immediately cut off. "I told you his body wasn't ready to take any more. He won't be any use to you if he's _DEAD_."

Everyone moved out of the room, their heads hanging low. The woman stepped forward looking at the scars that covered my chest. She ran her fingers along the scars sending waves of pain throughout me. She turned on her heals quickly grabbing supplies.

She set up a tray and sat by my side. First, she began by disinfecting all the scars that had been made across my chest. I felt every nerve in my body sting as the disinfectant met with my skin. She started off slowly trying to make it as painless as possible, but as she saw it wasn't helping she sped up the process. Her eyes focused on my chest. She had the same look on her face that Clarke often made when working on patients. After disinfecting it she softly rubbed some sort of cream across my chest. Instantly causing my skin to cool, slowly numbing the pain. After rubbing it all in she bandaged my chest.

She rested her head in her hands after she finished, her eyes squeezed shut. "I'm okay." I wasn't, but if I felt obligated to make her feel better. Even if she was one of them. She lifted her head out of her hands to look at me. Her eyes were red, swollen. The whites of her eyes were a soft pink shade. She was crying, but why? "Why do you care if they kill me?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Ever since we took you in as our prisoners I've been watching you. You're…intriguing. I was in charge of monitoring your vitals when they drugged you." She paused scanning my face, but I hid everything behind my cold exterior. "I care about you Bellamy." She cupped my cheek with her palm. I closed my eyes trying to wrap my brain around her intentions. She cared about me. I hadn't met her until now, but she knew me. She watched me. I moved my face away from her hand. "I know. It's crazy. But I feel like I know you."

I could feel the blood leave my face. I kept my eyes closed. I couldn't look her in the eyes. I love Clarke. Nothing would change that, ever.

My eyes burst open as I heard gunshots coming from outside. Every bone in my body hoping it was them. Hoping they were coming to save me. Hoping this was all over.

 **Clarke:**

Octavia, Raven, and I spent hours catching up while everyone slept. Talking about life in space, life in the bunker, and life on Earth. Octavia had it rough, but she did not falter at any sign of trouble. No Blake ever did. Raven kept systems running for the 6 years they spent in space. She even had a plan to come down before the foreign ship took over and kidnapped them. Raven was always one to save everyone's ass. It was nice to be reunited with them, and everyone else. It felt normal.

We decided to get a few hours of sleep before we had to prepare to leave. Raven found a nice spot near the fire. Octavia and I were going to sleep in the back of the Rover with Madi.

"So, did you and Bellamy finally tell each other?" I couldn't help but smile, a little thrown off by her question. Apparently, everyone knew we liked each other except for us. I could feel the blood fill my cheeks as they turned red. She flashed me a famous Blake smirk, obviously acknowledging my embarrassment.

"Yes, it was the first thing we did." I couldn't hide the embarrassment in my voice. She smiled as we continued walking. Her face was glowing under the moonlight. All her defined features highlighted by the moon. I hadn't seen Octavia smile since before Lincoln died. She's been so full of pain ever since. I would be too if it were Bellamy.

We both got into the back of the Rover laying on both sides of the Madi. Octavia hadn't known Madi for long, but she already treated her like family. She said she'd always wanted a badass niece. Everyone already loved Madi. Bellamy, Octavia, my mom, Raven, Monty, Murphy, Harper, Emori, Miller, even Echo has a soft spot for her.

I woke up to Octavia violently shaking me. "Wake up, it's time to go." I peered over my shoulder to see Madi missing. I quickly jumped out of the back. Searching the crowd for her.

I found her standing next to Octavia who was distributing responsibilities and going over the plan with each group. I grabbed Madi's hand pulling her to side. "Madi, you're staying here." Her face fell with disappointment. I had trained her all these years, but I couldn't let her go into war. It was dangerous.

"But I want to help save Bellamy too." She looked back up, her eyes eager. I had already almost lost her once. I couldn't let that happen again. But she grew up among people who trained and fought with their children by their side. Why should I treat her any different?

"Let her come with us Clarke, it's okay she'll be fine there's plenty of us to look out for her." Octavia moved closer, wrapping her arm around Madi. Madi smiled up at her. Madi looked so much like Octavia, but it was fitting considering Octavia was her other favorite person to hear stories about.

"Okay, but do not wander away from the group." I grabbed her chin pulling her face up so her eyes would meet mine. "I can't lose you."

I pulled her in for a hug before turning to stand in front of the large crowd of people standing around the Rover. I moved forward to stand next to Murphy. I looked over at him, his eyes were focused on Octavia. She was going over the plan we had put together last night. "I didn't think you'd be joining us." Murphy turned to look at me, his eyebrows raised in curiosity.

"You're not the only one here trying to save someone you care about." A smile tugged at the corner of my mouth. Murphy cared about Bellamy. 6 years ago, he would have never admitted it, but here he was prepared to fight for him. I gave him a nod and turned my attention back to Octavia.

She finished up her speech, everyone began dispersing marching in the direction of the ship. It was still dark, but if we wanted to attack at first light we needed to leave now. Raven and Emori stayed behind to take care of the injured and lead the group in charge of building shelter. Madi, Octavia, Monty, Murphy, Harper, Miller, Echo, and I headed out towards the ship to get Bellamy. Everyone was silent. We had to execute things perfectly if we wanted to get Bellamy out of there alive. Clearly this was everyone's biggest concern.

Tears burned in my eyes as I thought of all the pain he must have been feeling these past few days. I'm don't know what they're doing to him or what they want from him. But what I do know is that I'll kill anyone who gets in my way. My fingers tightened around my gun as we continued walking. I hadn't felt this angry since they tried to take Madi. If Bellamy wasn't so insistent that we break everyone out of the bunker I would have left after him almost immediately.

Octavia spent most of the time walking in silence, I could see the tension in her face. Occasionally she would break the silence by talking to Madi, who marched alongside her in unison. Octavia was clearly distracted by the pain her brother may be facing. But nothing I could say would distract her from it. She needed to see her brother. Bellamy was all the family she had left.

We were getting close. Everyone was becoming more and more eager. Coming to the end of the tree line we paused to take in our surroundings. Our plan was well put together, Monty was going to break through their systems leaving them defenseless against us raiding their ship. We would storm their hallways, killing anyone who got in our way. Octavia, Harper, Murphy, Miller, Echo and I were going to look for Bellamy while everyone else took down their guards. We would search all the rooms until we found him.

Kane stepped forward placing a hand on my shoulder. His eyes filled with hope. I gave him a reassuring nod before continuing forward. We didn't have time to stand around and hope, we needed to go now.

Octavia moved in front of the crowd as we marched towards the ship, Madi at her side. I sped up my pace quickly trying to catch up to her. She needed to know she wasn't fighting for this alone. The others followed suit, marching alongside one another.

We made it to the front of the ship, Monty quickly squatted down with a laptop he had recovered from the bunker. Quickly typing and trying to kill the code to open the doors. After a few minutes of typing, he looked up, his eyes glowing with pride. "I got it." I gave him a nod immediately giving him permission to move forward. He pressed down a key, causing the door to fall open. Octavia let out a loud scream before we stormed the ship. Our screams echoed through the ship.

A man ran at Octavia, quickly taken down as she swiped his leg out from under him. Madi quickly taking the machete gifted to her by Octavia to finish the job. The man's blood splattering all over her. More men flooded the hallway. Some had guns and some were unarmed.

Octavia jabbed at the guards, they were defenseless against her quick moves. She had been training 6 years. She knew what she was doing. As Octavia and Madi fought off the guards we went through checking the rooms. Miller and Harper collected their guns as they went along. No gun was any match for Octavia Blake.

Each room more hopeless than the next. Empty with nothing but beds and equipment. This may come in handy later if we needed supplies, but for now the mission was to get Bellamy.

A man disarmed Octavia, punching her in the gut. Knocking the wind out of her causing her to drop her machete. She was taken back, but gained momentum back almost instantly. Her fist meeting the man's temple, followed by a jab at his gut. She quickly took his arm and flipped him over her shoulder. Once he was on the ground she picked up the blade striking it right into his chest.

A crack came across the intercom. "Stand down or we'll kill him." The man's deep voice echoed throughout the hallways. Octavia's eyes met mine as we simultaneously began running down the halls. She checked the rooms on the left as I checked the rooms on the right. Judging by the emptiness of the rooms they didn't have as many people living on ship as they did rooms.

Finally, we came to a door that lead to another. This had to be it. Octavia burst through the door to find a control room. Four men with guns surrounded us. One man stood in the middle of the room, a large grin covering his face. It became quiet as we stared around the room, the only thing filling the room was our heavy breathing. The pounding of my heart grew louder the longer this man stared. He made me feel uncomfortable.

The man stepped forward moving his face in front of Octavia's face. "My, my, my what do we have here boys?" Octavia stepped back, her face was hardened. One hand gripping tightly to her machete the other hand balled up in a fist. "I think we should get rid of the boy, and keep these lovely ladies instead."

Octavia stepped forward spitting on the man's face. His once smiling face hardened. He grabbed the collar of his shirt, cleaning away the spit that dripped off his face. He grabbed Octavia's cheeks, squeezing them so her lips were forced into a pucker. In one swift motion, I stepped back as Octavia swung her arm at his face throwing him off balance. My foot moved up to meet his stomach. Octavia's leg swung around swinging below the man taking him down immediately. He laid on the ground yelling in pain. He tried to get up but Octavia placed the tip of her blade to his neck. "Any sudden moves and this blade pierces straight through him."

I focused my rifle on the man with his gun aimed at Octavia. "You shoot her, I shoot you. Seeing that we're the only two with guns this wouldn't end well." I flashed him a cynical smile.

Octavia focused her attention on the man on the floor. "What do you want from us?" I could hear the anger in her voice.

"We just want peace," he croaked. Clearly, he was scared. Not as confident as he was when he had the upper hand in this fight.

I couldn't help but let out a laugh. "If you wanted peace kidnapping one of our people was _not_ the way to get it." All the men's faces were filled with fear. "You started a war that you don't know how to end."

"We didn't start anything, you attacked our people." His voice a bit more confident than when he first spoke from under Octavia's blade.

"Your people tried to break into my lab. They tried to attack us. Then more of your people came and tried to kidnap one of our children."

Octavia let out a laugh. "Clarke, the intercom."

I backed up until I felt the panel behind me. My rifle still focused on the guard standing behind Octavia. I looked over at the buttons flipping the intercom on. I grabbed the microphone with one hand remaining on my gun. "Release Bellamy or we'll kill your leader."

"NOW," the man yelled throwing Octavia and I off guard. I immediately fired my rifle at the guard before he had the chance to set his finger on the trigger. The man on the ground took Octavia down his fingers wrapped around her neck. I shoot turn towards the guards taking two of them with ease before one attacked me from behind.

He wrapped his arm around my neck preventing me from much motion, but in swift motion I take the butt of my rifle and ram it between his legs. Once he landed on the floor in pure pain I stood above him focusing my gun on his chest. I shoot him point blank.

Once I turn around I see Octavia's unconscious body laid across the floor. The man quickly tackles me to the floor. Darkness takes over me as I fall unconscious.

Blood covered Octavia's face as she looked at me. She ran to me as she saw I was hurt. I brushed her off, we needed to move forward. The room was still filled with screams from the man who had his hand cut off. But what else did he expect when trying to touch Octavia? As we ran towards the exit a group of men rushed in.

I wake up to the crackle of the radio and an echo of a deep voice. "What do you mean he's gone? Find him," he yelled.

"But sir there's too many of them," someone on the other side of the radio responded.

"Okay, bring everyone you can into the control room. We're going to have to use these girls as bate." My eyes flickered open I felt my body restrained against a chair. Ropes tearing into my skin. My back was leaned against Octavia's limp body.

We were tied to one another, hands bound behind our backs, ankles bound in front of us. Once the man realized I was awake he took a few steps forward. Keeping a safe distance away from me, making sure I couldn't take him down again. "Feisty ladies, aren't you? If you played nice we could've lived happily together." He was smiling once again; this smile was smaller. He moved his remaining hand to my cheek, caressing me. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to pull away. His hands moved around my cheeks and down my neck. I was overwhelmed with anger. I swung my legs at his, all the weight of Octavia and I throwing him off guard.

One of the guards stepped forward hitting me with the butt of his gun. Octavia squirmed behind me, she was waking up. I moved my back closer to Octavia's hoping to loosen the grip of the rope against my skin. If we moved our backs close enough we could cover our hands and try to break them free. But it was hopeless we didn't have weapons and we were heavily outnumbered.

The man walked away placing his hands on the panels lying in front of him. He grabbed the microphone that laid in front of him. He cleared his throat before flipping the switch to turn it on. "Like I said earlier, stand down. Unless you want these ladies back in body bags."

"Let her go, I'm who you want. I'm the leader of our people. She's of no value to you." I tried to reason with the man, clearly their leader. He looked down at me. His face questioning mine.

"What makes you think I would do that?" His voice heavy with curiosity.

"You need someone to go tell my people to stand down, they're not just going to listen to some vague voice over the intercom. If you keep me you still have leverage. I'm the leader. I'm the one who can give you what you want. Let her go." I tried to remain calm, show that I was confident. I wasn't the leader anymore, Octavia was but if they were going to save either of us they would need her help. I felt Octavia's fingers tightening around mine. She didn't want to leave me behind. "If you don't want all of your people dead, you need to send her out."

The man moved his hand to his chin, thinking of the risks of sending her out to talk to their people. He turned his back to Octavia and I. "Take off her restraints, keep her weapon, but only release her once you are outside the door," he ordered the guard standing in front of him. He peered over his shoulder as he walked forward. I looked back at Octavia whose eyes were filled with fear. I watched her leave the room, her hands held behind her back while she was escorted out by two men.

She knew she had to leave, it was our only way of getting Bellamy. This was our only chance.


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N: I want to apologize for the technical difficulties with this chapter. I don't know why it ended up like that, but I promise it won't happen again. Hope you're all enjoying my story! Leave feedback I love hearing what you have to say. If you ever have any ideas as to how I can improve my story honestly send it my way. xx**_

 **Negotiations**

 **Bellamy:**

The gunshots came closer as I laid there. The porcelain woman stood up, her apologetic eyes meeting mine. She turned and ran out the other door. Before I knew it, I was alone listening to the screams and gunshots coming from outside. I tried to scream, but it was hopeless.

I heard the door burst open. "HE'S IN HERE. WE FOUND HIM." Murphy's voice filled the room. I held back the tears of relief as they flooded my eyes. He ran to my side quickly taking in my situation. "You're not looking too hot." I let out a painful chuckle at his painful joke.

I heard another person enter the room. Monty. "Good to see you, buddy." His face was filled with relief.

They both quickly worked at my restraints. I rolled out my ankles and wrists as they were given the freedom to move. Monty and Murphy moved to my shoulder helping me move up into a sitting position. "Where's Clarke? Where's O? Is everyone okay?" Their faces fell.

They glanced at one another as if deciding who would tell me what happened. "They took them," Monty finally let out. I quickly jumped up quickly. There was no time to waste. I wouldn't let them torture my sister and my Clarke the way they tortured me. Monty and Murphy both stopped me before I reached the door. "We know where they are, we just need something good to convince them to let them go."

"We have more people, we can take them down. Let's go." I felt my voice shaking as I yelled at them.

"We can't risk their lives, be rational Bellamy. We need to get them out safely." Monty paused looking at the computer that sat in the corner of the room. "If we can get eyes on them maybe we can figure out a reasonable plan. The room is just down the hall."

I looked up at Monty. There wasn't much time. "We need to move somewhere else first, they know you're here for me so they'll come here first." Murphy and Monty replied with simultaneous nods as they followed me out the door.

I moved as fast as I could down the hallway. I reached a door labeled _Security Office._ I beamed at Monty as we rushed into the room. There were monitors all over the room we had eyes on everything. I looked around trying to find the room where Clarke and Octavia were.

They were tied up and unconscious. My blood curdled. They looked like they weren't severely injured. I looked at the monitors taking in the chaos that was taking place around the ship. The porcelain woman. She was in a room labeled 101. "Monty where is room 101?"

He quickly pulled up a map of the ship. "It's 3 doors down, why?" He looked at the screen confused.

I headed towards the door without answering his question. I made my way down the hall, this time pushing through the pain. I rushed through the door causing the woman to jump. She looked horrified as she looked at me. I grabbed her by her shoulders, pushing her into the wall. "I need you to tell me if your leader has any direct weaknesses. Anyone he cares about."

She tilted her head confused, her breathing became heavy as she moved her face to my ear. "Go find a woman with long brown hair, brown eyes, and a scar across her face. Her name is Vanessa." I instantly let her go pulling away from her close proximity. I made my way back to the security room.

Murphy jumped as I burst through the door. "Find a brown hair, brown eyed girl with a scar on her face as fast as you can. If we're going to get them out of there we need her." Before Monty could respond there was another slam at the door. Followed by loud sobs.

Octavia. My heart broke as I took her in. She instantly wrapped her arms around me as she sobbed into my neck. I brushed her hair with my fingers trying to calm her down. "O how'd you get out? Is Clarke with you?" I turned her slightly so I could look at the monitor. Clarke was sitting alone on a chair still tied down.

"She told them she was our leader. She sent me out here to give you a message." She tried to catch her breath as she took control of her sobs. "She told me to tell you to take everyone back or they'd kill her."

I stepped back, my knees weakening underneath me. Murphy caught my arm before I continued on, helping me regain balance. "No. We're going to get her out. I have a plan."

Her brows furrowed as she looked at me with complete confusion. "Bellamy, they will _KILL_ her. You didn't see these guys, they weren't just planning on torturing us. They wanted to keep us." I could feel my fists cramp up as they balled into tight fists.

"What do you mean they wanted to _keep_ you?" I felt the anger fill my body, I wanted to attack. Now. Octavia avoided eye contact. I grabbed her by her shoulders shaking her to reality. "Tell me, Octavia." She began to cry. A million scenarios filled my head. I **_will_** kill this man. I turned to Murphy. "You stand guard, I'm going to go get Vanessa. We need to get Clarke out of there as soon as possible."

Murphy grabbed my arm holding me back. "No, everyone out there is probably looking for you." He paused trying to make me understand. "I'll go and find her. We don't need to draw any excess attention to ourselves assuming they're looking for you right now and probably have full access to the security cameras." I nodded trying to understand.

Octavia stepped forward. "I'm going with you."

I grabbed her arm. "No, you're not. They'll probably be watching you too."

She yanked her arm from my grip. "Clarke is sacrificing herself for _ME_. I am not sitting here and doing nothing. I'm going to get some people together. If you're going to bargain we're going to need back up."

I couldn't help but accept that she was right. I felt helpless sitting here, watching them torture Clarke. I looked away. If I watched anymore I would run in there and take all of their heads off myself.

Monty rested a hand on my shoulder as he stared at me. "She'll be okay, she's made it through worse." I gave him a small smile as I nodded. I couldn't even say anything; my mind was in too many different places to focus.

"Monty, if we wanted to take over the intercom to talk to them do you think we could make it possible?" He looked around as he thought it through.

"I think I can hold on." He quickly began typing, hacking away at their systems. He stood up and began searching the room, looking through some of the drawers. He pulled out a microphone, connecting it to the panel that laid in front of him. "I got it."

As soon as he set it up Octavia, Murphy, and a group of people made their way into the room. "Okay, we tied her up so she's good to go. I've got Miller, Harper, Echo, Madi, Indra, and Kane we're going to stay around the corner while you take Vanessa. If they try to make a move we'll be ready to attack." Octavia's face was hard as she reviewed the plan.

"Monty has the intercom set up, we can use that to contact the control room. I'm going to tell them to come out without any weapons. Just Clarke." I reached to grab the microphone as Octavia intervened.

"Wait, Monty can you make the intercom wireless?" Octavia's eyebrows were raised. She has grown so much, 6 years ago Octavia was never one to plan anything. Now she was more prepared than I was.

"Yeah easily, but why?" He raised his eyebrows, questioning her intentions.

"Okay, we're going to be in the hallway, you'll have a full view of what's happening. Once they step out I want to see if they stick to their weaponless word. If they don't we'll need to let them know we have an all access view of what's going on. They need to see we're in control." Everyone nodded in agreement. For once Kane didn't have an input, but by the way, Octavia was leading she didn't need any help from anyone else. Indra beamed with pride at Octavia's plan.

"Okay, let's get our girl." I picked up the microphone for the intercom. A crack came across the speakers. "Let her go and we'll let you live." This was the moment of truth. If they didn't cooperate we'd need come up with another plan.

There was silence for what felt like forever. I looked at the security camera in their room. Clarke was out of sight. The man moved towards the panel. "What makes you think you're in any position to bargain with me?" He sounded angry. Judging by the look on his face he was furious.

I couldn't hold back my smile. "I think I'm in a great position to be bargaining…considering I have someone that you want." I looked up at Vanessa who looked slightly beat and defeated. I'm assuming Octavia did that, but she every right to after they'd tried to hold her captive.

"Let her go," the man demanded. He stood by the panel in their room, his face blown up with anger.

"How about you meet me in the hallway outside of your room? No guards, no guns. You show me yours and I'll show you mine." I kept my cool, this was going to work. He was going to give into it. I just knew it. I would be back with Clarke soon. He clearly didn't realize that he truly had the upper hand in this bargain.

I watched the man on the monitor slam his fist down. He looked like he wanted to scream, but refrained from doing so. "Fine. But if you play any tricks. I swear I will end you."

I took his threat lightly considering I was going to be ending him for laying his hands on not only my sister, but Clarke. We stayed in the security room watching the monitors, he took Clarke down off the wall. Her shirt was ripped in half in front of her. Her chest covered in cuts and bruises. Blood covering her body.

Everyone was shocked at the sight of her. But even after being tortured she walked with confidence. Not showing any sign of pain. That was the Princess I knew and loved, never faltering at the sign of trouble.

"Bell, you go out with Vanessa. Murphy, Miller you two cover him. Kane, you need to stay here and make sure Monty is safe. Harper, Echo, Indra you two are in charge of their side of the hallway. I'll come join you once I know it's all clear," Octavia ordered.

Everyone turned on their heels following their directions. I made my way down to the hall waiting around the corner with Vanessa. As we stood there I heard the echo of a scared voice at the other end of the hallway. "I'm here, come out of wherever you're hiding."

I stepped out around the corner, slowly moving forward as I held Vanessa's bound wrists behind her back. I took in the sight of Clarke immediately and as the weight lifted off my shoulders just at the sight of her. She was so close. My heart pounded as I looked at her. Her shirt ripped, her chest covered in blood stains and cuts and bruises. I was overwhelmed. They hurt her more than they'd hurt me.

Clarke and I always shared the ability to talk with our eyes. I gave her a knowing look, she immediately understood. But she gave me a look of warning. She was in trouble. I tried to keep my face emotionless. We were interrupted by the crack of the intercom. "PUT THE GUN DOWN." Octavia's idea was perfect. I felt relieved. The man stepped back shifting the gun from her back to her head. But soon Octavia moved into my line of sight. Her face was cold. She focused her gun on the man's head. "I told you to put the gun down." Her gun cocked as she placed it against his head. She moved stepped backward until she was able to wrap her arm around Clarke. Her gun still focused on the man who had tortured Clarke. The man immediately dropped his gun to the floor. "Get on your knees," Octavia demanded. Her face was completely hard. She looked ruthless.

Just as Octavia prepared herself to pull the trigger Clarke stepped forward to take over. She wanted revenge. She earned it. "This kill is mine." She moved closer to him, moving the gun directly to the side of his head. "You thought you could have your way with me?" She was grinning in a way completely unfamiliar to me. A devilish smile.

Before she got the chance to pull the trigger the guards in the control room bust out the doors. Taking everyone by surprise. I was attacked immediately by a man holding a knife. I quickly grabbed his arm twisting it behind his back and disarming him. He tried to reach for me but I pinned him down. I picked up the knife cutting at his leg to disable him. Madi came running in piercing him in the chest with a machete similar to Octavia's.

I smiled up at her as she moved onto her next victim. I took down another guard who had cornered Miller. I hit my fist into the back of his head immediately knocking him out. Before Miller could show me his gratitude I turned to see Clarke take down a man who was about to attack Madi. I felt anger build up within me I picked up a blade from that had fallen out of the hands of one of the guards and stabbed him in the chest. Blood immediately pouring out of his mouth. His eyes wide.

Right as I looked up to meet Clarke's eyes I was pinned down by the porcelain woman who had helped me. Her eyes were puffy, tears were running down her cheeks. She leaned down to whisper in my ear, "I'm sorry, but if I can't…" She was interrupted by Clarke who had kicked her right off of me. She immediately propped herself on top of the porcelain woman, holding a knife to her neck. I laid on the floor next to her staring at Clarke as she scanned the woman's face.

 **Clarke:**

As soon the two guards returned the man stood in front of me. His eyes looking me up and down. "We're going to have some fun with you," he whispered in my ear. I felt sick to my stomach. But I couldn't break. Even if I didn't get away it'd be okay because Bellamy would be okay and he would take care of everyone.

The man stepped back taking in every detail of me. I could feel his eyes burning through my skin. His eyes filled were filled with satisfaction. He pulled a knife out of his back pocket. He stepped forward placing the blade to my chest, similar to how my mother did when she was chipped. He drew a line across my chest. My blood rushed out. His face went from satisfaction to curiosity. "Why is your blood that color?"

"I'm a nightblood, it helped me survive the radiation." I tried to cooperate, as long as his only concern was with me and my blood he wouldn't be asking about anything important.

He looked confused but continued to draw lines across my chest cutting into the top of my shirt. "Fascinating. Is all of your people's blood black?" He began to cut my shirt lower, each cut deeper than the last.

I refrained from making any noises. I had been through worse pain. I could get through this too. "No, just mine."

He stepped back to take a good look at me. "You're strong, stronger than the boy. I think I have a better idea of what to do with you." He turned around looking through the drawers around the room. Pulling out a long whip. He walked back towards me leaning forward he cut the rest of my shirt down the middle, leaving it hanging on my arms. "Now tell me, how many of you are there?"

He gently tugged at the whip in his hand playfully as he looked at me for an answer. "There's more of us than there is you." I didn't give anything away. "And we are far more prepared to fight than you are. Even if you kill me, you stand no chance of getting through to them. They _WILL_ get you." Anger filled him as he flew the whip back gaining momentum as it bit into my skin. I laughed as he hit me. "Is this the best you've got? I've been tortured in worse ways than you could ever imagine."

It was clear I was getting to him, but that was the point. His anger lashed out again as he whipped me this time striking my stomach. It burned, but I didn't show any emotion. If there was one thing I could do, it was hiding my emotions. He continued whipping me as I sat there and took it. "The only way you're going to save any of your people is if you beg me to make peace." His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at me.

"You're bold to be sitting in this position trying to make demands." He cracked his whip against my skin. "If you want me to stop then tell your people to stand down." I laughed in his face. If he wanted to get me to stop what they were doing they'd need a better plan than whipping me. "Okay, I have a better idea." He moved closer his face hovering in front of my own. I could feel his breath on my face. I moved my face away. He wrapped his hand around my neck. "Take her off the chair."

I have torn off the chair and tied against the wall, my arms stretched out on both sides of me. My legs spread apart. The man stepped forward pulling out a small taser. "I could ease your pain if you just cooperated," he whispered in my ear. I pulled my face away.

"You don't ease the pain. You overcome it." I relaxed my head back against the wall taking in a breath of air. I felt the shock of the man's taser on my side. To avoid giving him any satisfaction from his torture I just closed my eyes and swallowed the lump that had built up in my throat.

"Come on sweetheart work with me. I'd hate to see you in pain." I couldn't hold back the urge to roll my eyes. He moved closer to me running his hands down my sides until he reached my waist. I tried to move my body away from him, but the restraints only gave me a limited range of motion. "So, this is what it takes to get a reaction out of you?" He continued to move his hands up the sides of my arms.

Just as he was going to move his fingers down my chest the intercom cracked. His head instantly whipped around to look at the control panel. Everyone stood around it their hands raised as proof that it wasn't them. "Let her go and we'll let you live." Bellamy's voice echoed throughout the room. My heart filled with joy at the sound of his deep voice. He was okay.

The man rushed to the control panel, angrily grabbing the microphone. "What makes you think you're in any position to bargain with me?"

The room was silent as everyone waited for a response. My heart was pounding outside of my chest. "I think I'm in a great position to be bargaining…considering I have someone that _you_ want." I could almost see the smirk on his face as he replied.

"Let her go." The man's voice was filled with fear and anger. His breathing became heavy. It became the only thing anyone could hear. His hands were balled up into tight fists.

"How about you meet me in the hallway outside of your room? No guards, no guns. You show me yours and I'll show you mine." Bellamy spoke with confidence, something this man clearly lacked. Maybe it's because he didn't know how much I actually meant to Bellamy. But he didn't need to know.

The man slammed his fist into the control panel. "Fine. But if you play any tricks. I swear I will end you."

Chills went down my spine as he turned to look at me. I kept my face firm. The man walked back towards me. Slowly undoing my restraints. My shirt was torn right down the middle. I pulled both ends together holding them tight against my skin. The man grabbed my arm tight enough to leave a bruise. He held a gun to my back. "Say or do anything stupid and you will pay with your life." I just nodded as he began to lead me out of the door and into the hallway. He opened the door to the hallway. Peeking his head out to see if anyone was there. "I'm here, come out of wherever you're hiding."

Bellamy stepped forward holding a woman who had her hands tied behind her back. His eyes met mine. They filled with anger as he looked at me. Clearly taking in the ripped shirt and blood spread all across my chest. I looked at his bare chest. His chest marked with scars. I could feel a lump grow in my throat, but I quickly swallowed it. His brows furrowed as he stared at me. I stared at Bellamy his soft brown hair was damp from sweat. His eyes filled with the look I knew very well. They had a plan and this wasn't it.

I gave him a look of warning. But before anything happened the intercom cracked once again. "PUT THE GUN DOWN." Octavia's voice echoed throughout the hall. I felt my back stiffen as he moved the gun up to my head. The man's hands were shaking. "I told you to the put gun down." Octavia's voice echoed behind me as she cocked a gun behind me. I couldn't see her, but I knew she was holding it to his head.

I felt the gun leave my head followed by the sound of it hitting the floor. Octavia stepped forward, her gun still focused on the man behind me. She wrapped her free arm around me as she moved closer. "Get on your knees," she ordered him. He did as he was told. Octavia wrapped her finger around the trigger.

I placed my hand on the gun, her confusion filled eyes meeting mine. "This kill is mine." I stepped forward placing the gun to his temple. "You thought you could have your way with me?" I smiled down at him.

The door to the control room busted open, throwing me off. The guards ran out, but almost immediately the rest of our people rushed the hallway. Shots going off in every direction. The chaos filled the room. My gun fell from my hand as the man punched me. Octavia kicked him in the stomach pushing him against the wall.

In the corner of my eye, I saw Madi fighting the woman Bellamy had held captive. A man peered over her from behind preparing to attack, I quickly ran and jumped on him. As I dangled from his back I kicked the back of his knee, sending him straight down. As he landed on the ground Bellamy speared him through the chest with a blade.

As he looked up at me he was taken down by a porcelain looking woman in a white coat. She landed on top of him, pinning him down. She was whispering something, but before she finished I took her down. My foot meeting her side. I sat on top of her as I placed a knife to her neck. Tears ran down her face, she wasn't a member of the guard and she wasn't a prisoner. I stared at her with confusion.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chaos**

 **Clarke:**

It was chaotic. There was screaming, fighting, gunshots. Flashes of everyone running around me. I sat on top of the woman, taking in her distraught appearance. I held my knife against her esophagus.

She muttered something under her breath, but I couldn't hear it over the chaos. She whipped us over so she was on top of me, she held a scalpel to my throat. I fidgeted underneath her but she just moved the scalpel deeper into my skin.

"Stop. You don't need to do this." Bellamy was standing behind her. He placed a hand on her shoulder causing her to relax. She began to sob as she held the scalpel into my neck. Bellamy stepped forward placing his other hand on her other shoulder. "I'll give you what you want, just come with me." She looked up her eyes meeting Bellamy's. What was going on? Who was this woman? What did she want? She looked at Bellamy with admiration.

I took advantage of her vulnerability by lashing out at her. I grabbed the scalpel from her with one hand and punching her in the face with the other. My irritation took over as I took her down, my fist repeatedly meeting her face. She tried to push me away, but I wasn't moving. I continued punching her over and over again. Her blood spilled out everywhere, covering my fists and the floor.

Once she became unconscious I got off of her. My body was still shaking from the anger I was feeling. Bellamy grabbed my hand his eyes filled with tears. He pulled me into a tight embrace. I began to sob uncontrollably.

He pulled away holding me an arm's length away from him, looking me up and down. "I'm sorry." His eyes were filled with regret. "I promised you I wouldn't…"

"Stop. You did what you had to do, if I were you I would have done the same thing. Anything to protect our people, right?" I pulled him into another hug. Everyone in the room just disappeared, it felt like it was just me and Bellamy.

I began to pull away from Bellamy when I heard a shot go off. Bellamy's eyes widened as he began to fall. I caught him as he fell forward. Murphy and Miller moved forward to help me. Everything around me went black, all I could see was Bellamy's limp, lifeless body in my arms.

I looked around trying to figure out what happened. All I could see was Miller and Octavia fighting someone off before Echo grabbed my shoulders. "Clarke, you need to help him."

I was directed to a large room, Bellamy's unconscious body lying in the center of it all on a bed. Everyone around me was talking, but all I could hear was the pounding of my heart and the echo of the gunshot. I let out a large breath before all the commotion hit me.

"Clarke, there's no exit wound. You need to take out the bullet. Check for damage. Disinfect. Stitch him back together," Kane directed me.

I moved to Bellamy, my fingers instantly digging into his neck to check his pulse. It was weak, but it was there. "I need a 10-blade, forceps, a clamp, and a lot of lap pads." Kane turned on his heals checking drawers he immediately began setting things on the tray that stood next to me. He had spent enough time with my mom to understand what instruments were used in surgery and what they looked like.

I took some of the lap pads he set next to me to apply pressure to his bullet wound. Cleaning away excess blood. The blood felt endless. "I think there's a bleeder in there. Echo I need you to apply pressure, but leave me enough room to find it." She nodded as she followed my directions.

I picked up the scalpel cutting into Bellamy's back. Picking up the forceps I looked around his back to find the bleeder. "Move Echo I think I found it." I leaned over grabbing a clamp to stop the bleeding in his artery as I stitched it up. I carefully took the clamp off allowing his blood to continue flowing. Relief went through my body. It had only nicked an artery. I continued digging through for the bullet. "Kane check his pulse."

"He's still going, but you need to work fast he's still weak." I felt tears burn in my eyes, but I pushed them back and continued looking for the bullet.

I dug deeper and deeper until I found it lodged into his muscle. I finally felt like I caught my breath. A tear flew down my cheek. I carefully removed it, avoiding any further damage. "Echo take the lap pads and apply disinfectant to them, we can get ready to close him up." She handed me fresh lap pads. I carefully disinfected the outer skirts of his wound before I began to stitch him back up.

Once I was done I checked his pulse again. I couldn't hold back the tears as I felt his pulse stronger than ever. I felt my knees weaken underneath me as I stood by him. Tears dripping down my face.

"You did good Clarke, now just give it time. We should get out of here." Kane stood by me his arm wrapped around my shoulders. I turned in to hug him. Catching him off guard, but he continued to wrap his arms around me. Patting my head with his hands. "Everyone is outside, I think you should tell them he's okay."

I walked out into the hallway to find everyone sitting on the floor with their heads hanging low. As they noticed my presence hope filled their eyes. I couldn't help but smile as I met Octavia's eyes. She jumped up wrapping her arms around me. I could feel her tears running down my back.

Everyone else stood up to hug me. One after the other. Murphy was the last to greet me. A small smirk on his face. Two shirts in his hands. Without any words, he handed them to me. Followed by a tight hug. "Thank you. For everything." I managed to get out once he let go of me. He gave me slight nod as he followed everyone into the room that Bellamy was in.

I walked back into the room. Everyone was talking at once trying to decide what we should do with the remaining people. "If they give us their ship and leave forever, I say we let them live." Everyone turned to look at me, the room filling with silence. "This place has a lot of rooms, security, supplies, and there's not enough of them to come back and try to attack us. I think it's our best bet. Radio Raven to bring everyone else out here and we can decide together."

"We spent the past 6 years inside, we don't want to live like that anymore," Octavia chimed in.

"We don't all have to live in here, we can make living arrangements outside for anyone who wants to stay out here. But I think this ship will come in handy, especially during the winter." I looked around everyone looked satisfied. "Besides it's not like we won't be allowed to go out? We can go out when we want and come inside when we want."

Everyone began to nod in agreement. "Sounds like a plan," Bellamy croaked his voice raspy. Everyone's attention turned to him. Joy filled the room as everyone looked at him. A smirk across his face.

Octavia pushed through everyone quickly wrapping her arms around him. He patted her back with one hand with the little energy he had. His eyes met mine as Octavia hugged him. They were dark filled with passion.

Once everyone greeted Bellamy I stepped forward sitting on the edge of his bed. I placed my hand on this side of his face. As I touched him his eyes closed, he let out a small sigh. His hand landed on top of mine. He moved his hand up my arm, lightly tugging. I leaned in and burying my head in his neck. Wrapping my arms around his head. His face buried into my neck sending chills down my spine.

"Get a room," Octavia laughed from behind me. I pulled away turning to look at her. The room filled with laughter.

"How about you leave and we'll have one?" Bellamy rebutted. He smirked up at me, his fingers playing with mine. Followed by more laughter from everyone in the room.

"We need to finish up some negotiations, so how about we give you the room to rest while we handle everything else," I smirked back at Bellamy, who now laid beneath me with a disappointed look filling his face.

"If you're going to negotiate, I need to go with you." Bellamy tried to get up immediately pushed down by Murphy and me.

"Not so fast, you need rest. You just had surgery. Octavia and I will go. We'll take Harper, Echo, Miller, and Indra for back up." I rested my hand on his shoulder still holding him down. I took the other shirt that Murphy had handed me putting it on top of Bellamy's bare chest. "And while we're gone put some clothes on." We both smiled as I began to stand up, instantly pulled back down when Bellamy tugged at my arm.

"Not so fast," he smiled, pulling me into him.

I picked up the shirt pressing it against his face. I got out of his grip quickly as he pulled the shirt from his face. "Save your energy, you're going to need it." I whispered before I got up. I turned towards everyone else. "Indra, Harper, Echo, Miller you're all going to come with Octavia and I to the main deck. That's where we had our people gather any survivors. Kane, Monty, Murphy I need you to stay with Bellamy and try to talk to Raven about getting everyone here." Everyone nodded in agreement.

I looked back at Bellamy once more before leaving, his eyes burning through my skin. His smile was contagious. I followed everyone out the door grabbing my rifle as we left. We walked down the hallway moving around bodies that laid on the floor limp and lifeless. We made our way up the stairs, quickly following the directions to the main deck.

As we walked up to the main deck a large army of our people stood in front of the door, weapons hot. We walked past them and into the main room. About 15-20 people sitting on the floor. The man who had tortured us was tied up in the center of the room, the porcelain woman sitting beside him her face black and blue.

The tied man struggled against his chair trying to break free when he saw us enter the room. "I should kill you all right here," he yelled as we moved closer.

"We should kill you right now, but we have a deal for you." I kept my voice calm as I stared at him. He looked at me questioning my offer. "If you give us your ship and leave with just your remaining people, we will spare your lives."

His eyes widened. "Why would we give you our ship?" His voice was deep as he tried to argue.

"Well, we could kill you and take it anyways, this way you don't have to die in the process." He was speechless, staring at me with his jaw dropped. His body oddly relaxed as he sat on the floor.

"Where would we go?" His voice became low, almost at a whisper. His eyes looked sad.

"You will go far enough that we never have to cross paths again." There was an odd hostility in the room, but what else did I expect when we took over their home. A part of me felt guilty, but I knew it was necessary to our survival.

The room was silent for a few minutes until the man finally found the courage to answer. "Fine." He avoided eye contact, his head hanging low.

I turned to Octavia. "Put them in the cells upstairs until we get everything set up." She gave me a nod. I looked at the porcelain woman's beat up face once more before turning back to head out towards the room that Bellamy was in. Miller and Murphy following closely behind me.

"I don't think we should let them live. Remember what happened when we let Emerson live?" Miller's face looked concerned. He was never one to give advice, but he was right. "I saw the look on his face. He wants to kill you. He wants to kill us all. We don't need the risk."

I stopped to look at Miller. "You're right. We can talk about it. But I think it's different now, there's more of us than there is of them. We have the upper hand. When Emerson attacked we were already vulnerable because of Allie." He nodded, understanding where I was coming from. Miller was always good about understanding the decisions we made and why we made them. It's what made him a loyal member of the guard and a great friend.

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up to the smell of Clarke's hair hitting my face. My eyes fluttered open my eyes focusing on Clarke leaning against my chest. She was disinfecting and bandaging my wounds. I couldn't help but smile as I watched her focus on the task at hand. Her brows crinkled, her lips slightly parted, her nimble fingers working quickly on each scar.

Her piercing blue eyes slowly made their way up to find mine. They always had a way of making me feel vulnerable like she could see right through me. As soon as our eyes met a small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. Her smile was contagious once I saw it I couldn't hold mine back.

"How are you feeling? You don't seem to be having any significant swelling or bruising so it seems like you're fine, do you have any pain?" Her eyes flickered with concern.

"I'm feeling much better." I grabbed at her waist, pulling her in closer. "I've got plenty of energy now," I smirked at her causing her to blush almost instantly. It was like a reflex that only I was capable of setting off. It was one of my favorite things to do.

She lightly hit my shoulder as she began to laugh. "You can't even get up on your own what makes you think that you'll have the energy to do anything else?" She was trying to repress her smile, but it clearly wasn't working.

"Is that all I need to do to prove myself?" I began to get up, but she pushed my shoulder back down.

I fell back. "We'll have plenty of time to use that energy elsewhere when you've recovered, for now you should focus on resting. But I've called a meeting in your room in about 10 minutes we have some issues to discuss. We're waiting for Raven and my mom to get back with the rest of the people so we can get everyone's input." She focused her attention back on my chest, slowly running her fingers along the outside of my bandages.

I grabbed her hand. "Hey, I'm fine or at least I will be. I have a great doctor." Another smile crossed her face. "What issues do we need to discuss?"

She rested her other hand on top of mine. "We have a few details to review. Right now, the prisoners are all in their cells. We want to officially decide whether or not to kill them considering what had happened with Emerson when we let him go. We need to discuss how we're going to distribute the rooms in the ship and how we're going to build shelter for the rest of the people. And we need to discuss our plans for how we're going to move in all of the good supplies from the bunkers and the lab."

"Okay, well I have a few ideas but we can discuss them later." I pulled Clarke into me our lips only inches from one another. This had been the first time in a long time that we had been alone together. She was all that crossed my mind when I was being tortured and having her here, in front of me was the most amazing sight. Just as our lips met footsteps entered the room. Clarke quickly pulled away turning towards the door.

Octavia. I couldn't help but let out a large sigh followed by some eye rolling. She let out a loud laugh as she entered, followed by Miller, Murphy, Raven, Abby, Kane, Monty, and Indra. "Good to see you awake Bell," Octavia said with a smirk in response to my sigh and eye roll.

"Where's Madi?" I looked around the room.

"Don't worry she's sleeping next door being watched over by Harper, Emori, and Echo," Raven responded. I felt the tension leave my body. I felt oddly protective of Madi just like I did with Octavia.

Everyone pulled up a chair sitting around my bed. Clarke and Octavia helped set up some pillows to prop my back up against the wall so I could join in on the meeting. "Let me start by saying, it's good to see you all here today." Clarke started sending a small laughter among everyone. "Let me make a few things clear before we start our discussion. What we discuss here does not leave this room. If you cannot stay true to your word then leave now." We all looked around the room, but everyone remained seated. "Okay, and we are not chancellors. We have not officially set up a government, but Octavia has been running things since Praimfaya and until further notice it will remain that way. We are only here to give our best advice, that's all. The final decision is eternally up to you Octavia." She gave a firm nod. "We have our best guards, soldiers, doctors, engineers, and leaders in this room it is our responsibility to come up with the best possible decision for our people. That is our only concern." Everyone remained quiet nodding in agreement to the terms of the meeting. "Okay, now that we all understand. Octavia, tell us what we need to discuss."

Octavia sat up as she was given the spotlight. "Let's start with our biggest issue right now. We need to decide if we are going to banish these people or kill them. What are your suggestions?"

"I think that we cannot compare these people to our situation with Emerson because it is much more different. If we banish them they won't have access to weapons because we'll have them all and they won't have access to our camp because we'll be well guarded. We'll take extra precaution, but judging by the fight they put up they won't be much of a threat." Everyone looked to me. Some nodded in agreement and some just sat there with confused looks on their faces.

"Bellamy, when you all came down here you didn't have weapons either but you found them. Do you really want to take that chance?" Miller made a good point. We were a small number compared to the mountain men and the grounders, but we still put up a good fight. They could easily do the same.

"Good point Miller. But I think the circumstances have changed a lot since then don't you think?" Kane scanned everyone's expressions.

"But why take the chance?" Murphy interjected.

"We will leave banish them. If they ever cross paths with any of our people we will show no mercy." Octavia's voice was harsh, but she was right. It's what I told Murphy when we had first banished him. Everyone nodded in agreement. "We will review the terms of the agreement with them once more before stripping them of their weapons and banishing them." Everyone remained silent. "We will need to decide how we are going to transport useful items from the bunkers and lab to the ship."

"The Rover is good for larger loads, I think if we get enough scraps I can make another one?" Raven looked around, her face filled with confidence. "It's our best form of transportation. It saves us more time and we won't have to send out as many people to get the stuff."

"How fast can you make another one?" Abby asked with curiosity laced in her voice.

"Maybe a week if you get the scraps together fast enough?" Raven looked to me.

"I think I can lead a team out to the lab tomorrow we can pick up as much as we can." My eyes looked around avoiding Clarke. I could feel her eyes burning through me.

"No, you can't, I've ordered him to bed rest for at least a week. He nicked an artery and that is too fragile for him to be going out and doing heavy duty work." Clarke's voice was filled with anger and frustration.

"Yeah, I agree with Clarke you're in no condition to be doing work right now. Kane can lead a group out," Octavia continued for Clarke. Giving her a nod in agreement. "We have all the weapons you found right Clarke?"

"Yes, we stacked any and all guns into the Rover when we left the lab. The other bunker doesn't have weapons. But they do have cots. I think tomorrow you should go to the bunker first. We need as many beds as we can get." Clarke's voice echoed with confidence.

"Let's set all of our weapons into one room for an armory, then Kane can lead a small group of people to the bunker and lab for supplies tomorrow. The rest of us can work at building shelter," Octavia responded.

"What type of shelter will we make? We don't have enough material for tents that'll last the winter," Indra spoke out.

"How about cabins? We can cut down trees and use that to make shelter. We have more than enough cots, if we make a few really large cabins we can use those as shelter during the winter or when there are storms." Raven was right, if we made cabins it could fit plenty of people and when the weather was good enough people could sleep outside. It gave them an option.

"How many people would fit in one cabin? I think they should be of a normal family size for those people who want to start families. Maybe 5-6 people," Clarke spoke, avoiding eye contact. Did she want a family? Did I want a family? I guess we already are a family. Me, Clarke, Madi, Octavia, Kane, and Abby.

"The cabins I read about on the Ark could fit about 6 people in 3 different rooms. Meaning 2 people per room. They're not really hard to make they just take time, effort, and a lot of manual labor. We just so happen to have all 3 of those things." Monty finally spoke up. He had spent a lot of his time on the Ark studying. He read about plants, animals, old architecture. He wanted to be prepared for when we got down here.

"So, it's settled, we'll have the option of cabins for those people who prefer to stay outside, but until that's made everyone will need to sleep outside and we'll need a full guard on duty. Miller will run the guard until Bellamy is back on his feet." Octavia was such a good leader, she took everyone's advice and made it her own. She has become the person I always knew she was capable of being. I no longer needed to protect her anymore because she was her own person. "As for deciding who sleeps inside and who sleeps outside. All essential personnel will be given the opportunity to select where they want to sleep, then we will divide the sectors of the ship. We will need to see the size of the infirmary and then distribute rooms according to what is remaining."

"Sounds like we're…"

Kane was interrupted by the crack of the radio that sat on the table beside me. "Bellamy, we need you to come to the cells a woman here says she needs you."

I picked up the radio almost immediately. "Who? What does she want?"

The guard was silent for a few seconds. Everyone's eyes were focused on me. "She says she's the woman who treated you when you were a prisoner. She wants to make a deal with you. But she'll only talk to you."

I looked up to see Clarke glaring at me. She took the radio from my hand. "He's resting, he can't come talk to her. If she wants to talk to anyone she'll talk to me." Clarke's eyes were locked on mine. I couldn't help but smile. Was Clarke jealous? The more I smiled the angrier she got. I reached to grab her arm, but she dodged me as she got up. "This meeting is over, right?" She couldn't hide the irritation in her voice. Everyone looked from one another with their eyebrows raised.

"Yes, but I think I should go talk to this woman. You seem…a little tense. She may be of some value," Octavia said as she stared at me. She gave me a questioning look. Slowly standing up. "You stay here and watch Bellamy, I'll be right back." I leaned forward grabbing Clarke's hand to pull her back down. She cooperated sitting down slowly. Her face still filled with anger.

Everyone slowly followed Octavia out of the door in silence. Clearly trying to avoid coming into contact with Clarke's anger. Once everyone was gone I turned to Clarke. "She was just the doctor who patched me up between each torture session. She helped us find Vanessa. I don't know what she wants." She looked down at her hands, her eyebrows crinkled from the tension in her face.

"You didn't see the way she was looking at you. When I took her off you she was crying. She was hurt. It's like there was more to it. She looked at you the way Octavia looked at Lincoln." I was taken back by her comment, but I knew it was true. But it didn't matter.

I grabbed Clarke's hand giving it a nice squeeze. "It doesn't matter because I love you. I've loved you every day since we got to Earth and every day I was gone. Nothing she says or does will ever change that." A smile layered on her face. Her cheeks turning back into the tone of pink that I loved.

"I love you too Bell." I tugged at her arm pulling her in for a kiss. But once again we were interrupted.

This time it was Madi. She came running in. Hugging Clarke from behind. "Can I sleep with you guys tonight?" Her eyes looked sad as she looked up at me.

Before Clarke could deny her, I responded, "Of course you can." I tapped the spot in the middle of the bed. She quickly moved over me to join me. Clarke looked down at me with a raised eyebrow. I just continued to wrap my arm around Madi pulling her into my chest as she stared at me.

She leaned down giving me and Madi a kiss on our foreheads. "You two stay here I'm going to see if I can find us a bigger room. If we're all going to share a room we'll need a reasonably sized room." I grabbed Clarke's arm, pulling her back.

I picked up the radio while still holding onto her arm. Her face filled with slight irritation. "Monty, do you know if there's any rooms with a bigger bed and maybe a little more space?"

There was a slight pause before he responded. "Yes, actually a few rooms down is the biggest room in the ship. It's room number 100. I'll come in and we can move you in."

"Thanks, Monty, but I can get there myself." I smiled to Clarke. "See it was that easy. Now let's move into our new room. I hear it's the biggest in the ship," I smirked. Clarke rolled her eyes before smiling back.

Once we got into our room I took my shirt off, laying down immediately. "You can't ever sleep with your shirt on, now can you?" Clarke said rolling her eyes. Madi let out a small laugh.

I turned my head towards her catching her smirk before she gave me a mean mug face. "Nope, never." I laughed. Madi joined me on laying her head on my arm as she cuddled up against me.

"Be careful Madi, Bellamy is still sensitive from surgery so don't put too much pressure on him." Clarke sat next to Madi brushing her hair out of her way. "Goodnight my little nightblood."

"Goodnight Clarke, goodnight Bellamy." Madi scooted closer to me, keeping a safe distance from my chest.

"Goodnight Madi." I gave her a light kiss on her forehead before relaxing my head back. Clarke turned off the lights lying down on the other side of Madi. I gave the back of her neck a little squeeze with the arm that laid beneath Madi. Clarke turned so her face laid in my palm. I felt so relaxed. I was finally home with Clarke, Madi, and my sister.


	15. Chapter 15

**Interrogation**

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up to the hum of Madi's snoring. Madi's arms were wrapped around me, her face resting on my shoulder. Clarke's arm was draped over Madi, leaving her hand resting on my stomach. I moved my free arm under my head. This was where I wanted to be, this was how I wanted to wake up every day.

Madi's snoring temporarily stopped as she turned away to face Clarke. Clarke instantly unconsciously wrapped her arm around Madi, cradling her while they both slept. I slowly removed my arm from under Madi, gently laying her head back trying to make sure that she didn't wake up.

Once I slipped out of bed I tried to stretch, the pain in my back shooting throughout my body. I made my way to the door, there was a lot that needed to be done today. I needed to know what happened between Octavia and the woman. Cautiously I opened the door, to my surprise Monty and Murphy were standing outside my door with two armed guards.

"Shouldn't you be in bed resting?" Murphy stood across the hall leaning against a wall with his arms crossed, his eyebrows raised with curiosity.

I crossed my arms in front of me looking down at him. "I need to talk to my sister. What are you all doing here?"

Monty stepped forward, resting his hand on my shoulder. "We wanted to make sure you guys were okay, we had guards take turns guarding your door. We just wanted to make sure you 3 were okay."

Monty gave me a nod and a half smile. "Thank you. Do you know where my sister is?"

Murphy stepped forward pointing at a room to my left. "She's in the room next door." Murphy took from the other guard, taking over his position. Monty followed suit as they stood in front of mine and Clarke's room. I made my way to Octavia's room, making sure to walk straight to avoid giving away any sign of pain I was feeling.

As soon as I got through the door I found Octavia sitting at a desk in the corner of her room going through blueprints of the ship. "O, so what happened yesterday? What happened when you talked to the woman? What are we doing today? Why are there armed guards outside my room?" I couldn't contain myself, I wanted to know everything. I felt out of place just sleeping while there was so much to do. A part of me felt like they didn't need me anymore.

She looked up at me, her eyes wide. She stood up guiding me to sit down on her bed. "Calm down Bell. Everything is handled. Shouldn't you be in bed resting? You barely just had surgery yesterday!" She was nearly yelling at me. Standing tall in front of me with her hands on her hips. She was glaring down at me, but I didn't let her intimidate me.

I crossed my arms in front of my chest, ignoring the pain shooting through me. "I'm fine, I'll go back and get rest after you answer my questions." I glared right back at her.

She mimicked me, crossing her arms in front of her chest, slightly shifting her weight from one foot to the other. "The woman, Alexandra Pope, wanted to make a deal. She says she helped you, she was your doctor. She fought against torturing you. She wants to integrate into Wonkru."

"She was my doctor, she did help me. But I don't know if I trust her. Are you going to let her join us?" Her head tilted from one side to the other, her face tensing even more as she tried to read my face.

Her eyes began to burn with anger. She pushed the anger behind her as she stared at me. "She's still in her cell, I'm going to wait until Clarke is awake so we can decide what we're going to do with her. As for what we're doing today and why there were guards outside your room, well don't worry about it."

"O, I want to help. Please, let me help." Her eyes began to soften, her arms loosened in front of her. My sister had changed, she didn't need me anymore and that hurt me.

She stepped forward laying her hand on my shoulder. Her eyes softened as she gently rubbed my shoulder with the pad of her thumb. "I know what I'm doing. I have Clarke, Indra, Kane, Abby, Raven, and so many other people to help me. You need to rest. I know Clarke wouldn't want you to be up and running around."

Suddenly the door to her room slammed shut. Clarke stood in the doorway, her hair still a mess. Her eyebrows furrowed, her face filled with anger. "Damn right she wouldn't. Bellamy, get back into our room right now. You need to be resting for at least a few days before you're up and ready to help us with anything." Her fists landed on her hips as she stared down at me.

"I'll rest when I know everything's okay." I looked back to Clarke, her face slowly relaxing.

Octavia stepped back, standing evenly beside Clarke. "That's for us to worry about. Besides we'll keep you updated every step of the way. But right now, you need to go and lay down." Octavia mimicked Clarke's intensity. They both stood side by side glaring at me.

I stood up, my hands instantly balling up into fists. I looked down at them. "No, first take me to Alexandra I want to know everything she knows. She trusts me. She'll only talk to me." Clarke's face immediately fell. Tears filling her eyes, but she held them back.

"We'll bring her to you. In your room. While you're resting. Now go," Octavia demanded. I stepped forward, moving closer to Clarke.

She instantly pulled away, moving around me. "So, Octavia what do you have for me?" Her voice was shaking, but she just moved towards the desk. I looked back at Octavia who responded to me with a simple shrug. I wanted to talk to Clarke, but I knew now wasn't the time.

I turned to the door and left. As I got out of Octavia's room I was greeted by Kane and Indra. "Bellamy, shouldn't you be in bed?" Kane raised an eyebrow as he stared down at me.

I couldn't hold back the urge to roll my eyes. "I've been through worse pain Kane, don't worry about me."

"Well, you have nothing to fight against anymore. We're safe now so go rest." He gave me a small smile before I moved past them towards my room. Monty and Murphy were gone, I guess since Clarke and I were awake there was no need for security.

I walked into the room to find it empty. Where had Madi gone? I turned back looking down the hallway. Miller was walking down towards the security room. "Miller, have you seen Madi?" I yelled behind him.

He turned around and gave me a questioning look. "No, she should be in your room sleeping."

I looked around the halls. Moving past Miller, I quickly rushed down to the security room. Bursting through the door I found Monty sitting in a chair in the middle of the room looking through a book.

"Monty, do you know where Madi is?" I could feel my hands shaking as I looked at him, slowly looking at all the screens hoping to find her in some other room.

He looked up at me slowly setting his book down. "No, but let me check around the ship." He began typing on the control panel quickly scanning through the rooms. I grabbed the radio that was set in front of him.

The crackle of the radio filled the room once I turned it on. "Does anyone know where Madi is?"

Silence filled the air for a few minutes, no one responded. My heart was racing. Monty looked up at me with concern, but immediately began typing again. "We haven't seen her," Murphy responded.

"What's wrong? Is she not in her room?" Octavia's voice came across the radio.

"I went into our room and she wasn't there. I'm going to go look for her someone stay with Monty." I turned towards the door, picking up a gun.

"Bellamy, wait. You shouldn't be running around. I'll send someone else." He stood up trying to stop me.

"No, she's my responsibility. I'm going to go find her. Radio me if you find her through the cameras." I turned to the door immediately rushing out. I ran as fast as possible down the hallway, looking to both sides. I didn't know where I was going exactly, but I knew I had to find her.

I found my way to the stairs. I went to the next floor, checking the next floor. Nothing.

"Has anyone got eyes on her?" I yelled into the radio. Suddenly I heard footsteps behind me. Madi. She was smiling trying to catch up to me. Relief ran through my body. I picked her up, hugging her, holding her against me.

"Relax Bellamy, I was just out for a little adventure." She rested her head on my shoulder as I held her.

I set her down immediately setting my hands on her shoulders to hold her. "You scared me, I thought something happened to you!"

She looked at me confusion running through her eyes. She grabbed my hand, placing her other one on top of it. "It's okay. Let's go back to our room. You need to lay down maybe I can keep you entertained." A large smile taking over face. I couldn't help but smile back.

"I found her guys. She's okay," I radioed back.

Madi began to guide me back up the stairs. Her hand still gripped onto mine. "Damn it Bellamy don't scare me like that," Octavia eventually responded. The relief clear in her voice.

"Let's stop in the security room really quickly," I stopped Madi as we strolled down the hallway to our room.

I peeked my head in to find Clarke, Monty, Kane, Indra, and Octavia gathered around the control panel in the middle. Everyone looked up at me as I opened the door. Clarke immediately dropped her eyes back down to the blueprint. "Madi if you're going to go anywhere tell someone before leaving," Clarke ordered her eyes still focused on the blueprint.

Madi looked down at her hands twiddling her fingers. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to explore the ship. It's so big and there's so many rooms!" Everyone let out a little chuckle at Madi's excitement. It was nice to have someone among us that actually enjoyed all of this.

"Go lay down Bellamy. I'll be in to change your bandages soon." Clarke's eyes still focused down. I turned around and did what she said. She was not to be argued with right now.

As I laid down on the bed Madi sat next to me. Her legs crossed in front of me. "Do you need me to get you anything Bellamy?"

"No, thank you." I smiled up at her. "So, how about you tell me about what it was like for you on Earth?"

Her face immediately lit up with excitement. "Well, I was alone for the first few months you know because everyone else died and I was scared. So, one day I decided I was going to find a better place to stay, the cave I was living in wasn't any good to stay in. That was the day I met Clarke. She was out in the Rover driving around and she drove up to me. After that she took me in, she took care of me. I was really sad for a long time, but she helped me realize that family isn't only blood they can just be people you care about. She taught me how to shoot guns, fight in combat, drive the Rover, hunt, and she taught me history. The history of the Earth, my people, her people. Everyone. If it wasn't for Clarke I don't know what I would have done. She has done so much for me." Her eyes suddenly fell as she thought about Clarke. Sadness taking over her face. "I wish I could've done that for Clarke, but no matter how happy she was with me I knew she was still sad. At night, she would cry. In the morning, she would wake up and call you. Sometimes she would be happy to talk to you and sometimes she would cry. She thought I couldn't hear, but I could."

I just stared at Madi, she was so young but had already gone through so much. I brought my hand to hers giving it a soft squeeze. "You have done a lot for Clarke. She's told me many times. Sometimes you just have to let it all out that's all." Her eyes were focused on me. She gave me a soft smile. "You've already done a lot for me."

The gleam quickly came back into her eyes. I grabbed her hand giving her a nod. I hadn't known her for long, but I felt protective of her. Just like I felt when I held Octavia in my arms for the first time. She laid down next to me hugging me gently to make sure she wasn't hurting me. I laid there caressing her hair until I fell asleep.

 **Clarke:**

I walked into our room to find Bellamy and Madi sleeping on top of the sheets. Of course, the room is filled with sound of Madi's soft snores.

I turned to my medical bag taking out bandages and disinfectant. At least Bellamy being asleep meant I didn't have to talk to him about Alexandra. I know she saved him, but something tells me there's so much more to it.

I quickly set up the side table with my supplies before reaching for Bellamy's shirt. If I lift it up gently enough he won't wake up. As I grab the hem of his shirt to gently pull it up Bellamy's hand grabbed mine. I looked up to find his eyes staring right into mine.

I took my hand back before he could tighten his grip. Our eyes still locked onto one another. "Take off your shirt."

He smirked at me. But his smirk didn't reach his eyes like it normally did. "Slow down, Madi's still in the room."

I rolled my eyes, tugging at the bottom of his shirt. "I need to change your bandages, I've got a lot of other things to do today Bellamy." I kept my voice as stern as possible. His face fell as he slowly pulled his shirt over his head. He let out a soft grunt from the pain.

I gently pulled off the bandages, he gritted his teeth trying not to let out a sound. I took the disinfectant from the table applying some to a cloth. I lowered my hand to his chest. I slowly cleaned around his wounds. Bellamy's breathing became heavy. Once I was about finished cleaning the scars on his chest, Bellamy grabbed my hand again.

"I'm sorry." His voice was so vulnerable. I stared at his hand wrapped around mine. "I promise you, I could never love anyone the way I love you." His other hand cupped my cheek. I felt tears burning in my eyes. "Please, just trust me. I can do this. You know I can."

"Bellamy. Stop. I told you, I'll bring her here. I don't need to hear it." I looked up at him, his eyes sparkling from the tears in his eyes.

"No, you need to hear it. You need to trust me Clarke. I want what's best for us and I know that I can get us all the information we need to figure these people out. To be sure of what their intentions are." His face full of tension, but also fear.

I put my free hand on top of his. "I do trust you. I'll go get her and you can talk to her as long as Octavia and I can stay in the room with you."

"Okay. Now please just stop giving me the cold shoulder." I couldn't hold back my smile as I stared into his sad eyes. He instantly smiled back.

"Fine, but stop distracting me from doing my job."

He moved his free hand to my neck, gently outlining my jaw with his thumb. "I'm sorry it just gets so hard to keep my hands off you."

I moved his hand back to his side trying to focus my attention back to bandaging his chest. "Now can you sit up for me? I need to rebandage and check your stitches."

"Yes Ma'am." He slowly moved up so that I could take off his old bandage. He let out a loud grunt. "Gentle doctor Griffin, I just had surgery last night you know?"

"Even in pain you're unbearable." I rolled my eyes. Bellamy chuckled. "Your stitches are a bit inflamed so I can't use disinfectant on it right now. I'm going to clean it off with some water, re-bandage it, and then I'm going to need you to lay on your side or your stomach so that it can calm down." He gave me a nod so I quickly got up to get some water from the bathroom. I walked back into our room to find Octavia sitting at the foot of the bed.

"Are you almost done? We need to go." I responded with a slight nod. She instantly stood up. "How's he looking?"

"Well, he'd be better if he would listen and get some rest." Octavia let out a chuckle. "But he'll be fine. I just need to bandage this then we can go."

"Where are you going?" I knew Bellamy would ask. My eyes met Octavia's, she was unsure of whether or not to tell him. I shook my head.

"We have to go check the medical supplies and decide if the infirmary is big enough to harbor enough sick or injured people," Octavia responded. Being the commander gave her strength. She's really grown up.

"I'm guessing you're going to want me to lay here and do nothing?"

I leaned down, grabbing his face. "You catch on fast." He slightly smiled before brushing his lips against mine. He slowly deepened the kiss, but I pulled away immediately. "Now we don't have time for this right now. I'll send you some food and we'll be back soon, okay?" I lightly kissed his lips once more before turning to Octavia. "Let's go."

"We better not find you out there roaming the halls Bell." I walked past Octavia to the door. Grabbing the radio on my way out. "Okay, we've isolated Alexandra into a room so we can go talk to her I have Indra and Miller watching her right now. Radio someone to send food to Bellamy."

"Okay, I don't know who she is or what she wants but before she goes and talks to Bellamy I want to get an idea of what she wants." Octavia nodded at me, at least she understood where I was coming from. "Octavia, I just don't feel like we can trust her."

"I understand, that's why I'll be there to make sure you're right." She patted my shoulder before turning towards the stairs.

As we walked down the hall I grabbed my radio. "Kane, can you have someone take food up to Bellamy and Madi?"

There were a few minutes of silence before he replied. "Yes. Abby will go take them food and keep them company."

"Thank you. Octavia and I are going to follow through with the plan make sure Abby knows the plan before she goes up there." Octavia stopped in front of a door on the first floor. I sharply inhaled a large breath of air before walking in.

The once perfect porcelain woman sat in a chair tied up, cuts and bruises all across her face. I couldn't help but feel a little satisfaction by seeing the look on her face when she saw me. Miller and Indra stepped back towards the door.

I stepped forward, leaning down to look the woman in the eyes. Her cold blue eyes met mine. "Why should we trust you Alexandra?"

She sat in the chair silently trying to read my face. "I want to talk to Bellamy," she demanded. Her face was emotionless.

"Well, you're in no position to be making demands so unless you give me something you won't get anything any time soon." I stood up and crossed my arms, looking down at her.

"I saved his life, more than once. You can trust me. I was watching over them the entire time we kept them to make sure they didn't do anything to them. You all killed some of our people, brutally attacked them. You couldn't expect us to just sit around and do nothing." She got loud, her voice echoing throughout the room.

" _Your_ people attacked us. Don't try to make yourselves the victims." I looked to Octavia who stood behind me with her arms crossed, silently watching.

"I'm the reason they even got out, we sent them out to test the radiation levels. If I hadn't suggested using them as our guinea pigs then they would have rotted in our cells." Her was shaking. Her face tense, frown lines were cratered throughout her face.

"And you think that's some big favor? Why do you want to see Bellamy? Why him specifically? There were others you all held captive. We can get one of them for you." I couldn't contain my anger, it was slowly building up within me. I don't know how long the verbal interrogation will last.

"Because he's the only one I trust, the only one I care for, the only one I lo…" A loud slap echoed in the room. Octavia couldn't contain her anger, she had moved in front of me instantly slapping the porcelain woman. I couldn't speak. This woman thought she was in love with Bellamy. My Bellamy. Octavia had slapped her before she got the chance, but it doesn't change the fact that she was still going to say it.

"How dare you? How dare you think it's okay to make facetious claims." Octavia's anger was taking over the room. Her fists were rolled into two tight balls. I could see her muscles all tensing. Her breathing became heavy. I laid my hand on her shoulder, immediately relaxing her body. She looked over her shoulder at me. "No Clarke, who does she think she is? You don't torture people you love. You fight for them."

"I did try to fight for him! What did you expect me to do? We couldn't run anywhere. I protected him as much as I could." Alexandra's breathing became heavier as she pulled against her restraints.

Octavia let out a large huff mixed with an angry laugh. "No, so you say you love him. You care about him. Why? What did he do to make you love him? Did he save your life? Did you talk to him?" I couldn't help but question her motive. Bellamy said his only encounters with her had been when he was being tortured. She was just his doctor, no further interaction.

"He didn't do anything. I spent the months we had kept them captive monitoring them through the security room. I watched him comfort his friends, watched him cry when everyone was asleep, watched him lead the group each and every single day, watched him try to plan his escapes. He was determined. I fell in love with his determination and dedication to help his people. I was always the one to treat him so as I got closer to him it just made it easier for me to love him." I couldn't breathe. Before I knew it, I found myself punching her porcelain face without any hesitation. I couldn't stop.

Octavia finally pulled me off, pushing me against the wall. "No Clarke, Bellamy wouldn't want you to lose it. This isn't you," she whispered. I tried to catch my breath, but I couldn't. My anger was taking over my body and it was suffocating me. I bent over and rested my palms on my knees. "Miller, radio Abby we'll need medical in here but be discrete she's with Bellamy." Octavia turned back to me grabbing my arm. "Come on Clarke I think it's time for a break."

She guided me out of the room and I finally caught my breath. I leaned against the wall slowly sliding down to the floor. I couldn't speak, I couldn't hear, I couldn't think. I was numb. I saw my mom squat in front of me before she was whisked away by Octavia. Their conversation was nothing, but a distant mumble in the back of my mind.

My mother rushed inside the room. Octavia joined me as we sat on the floor. She set her hand on my knee. "It's okay to lose it sometimes. I would too if someone had ever talked about Lincoln like that. But don't lose yourself. Bellamy is yours. He will always be yours."

I turned so that my eyes met hers. I pulled her into my arms hugging her tight against me. "Thank you, Octavia." I began to relax as her arms wrapped around me. "I'm sorry I don't know what came over me. I just...I couldn't handle it. First Echo, now this it's just…"

"Bellamy may have gotten around, but remember he's only ever wanted you." We both began to laugh. I felt the weight that was pressed against my chest slowly release its pressure. I laid my head back and just took deep breaths. "How about you sit here and catch your breath and then I'll come get you once your mom is done?" I gave her a nod and watched her walk back into the room.

How could I ever doubt Bellamy? He loves me. I love him. He spent the past 6 years hoping to see me again. He was always there for me. He's my family. So is Octavia. She had grown to be the sister I never had. I just can't let my jealousy get the best of me. He's mine. Only mine.


	16. Chapter 16

**Vulnerable**

 **Bellamy:**

I had been locked up in our room for what felt like forever. Everyone took turns coming to check up on me, update me on what's going on, and I guess in a way entertain me. First, it was Madi and me, but once Abby came in she left to explore the ship with Emori and Murphy.

Abby stayed with me for a few hours. We talked about what was going on, about what the past few years were like, and about Clarke. She gave me her blessings and I felt relieved, but a part of me knew that she always saw us together. Abby had to leave for a medical emergency, something about a fight.

I can't lay here and do nothing anymore. Clarke and Octavia said they would be back hours ago. They hadn't even come back to check up on me. Part of me feels like there's something they're not telling me.

I got up off the bed and began pacing back and forth. If I was going to leave this room I needed to make sure I was capable of walking properly. I had to prove myself. After a few minutes of walking back and forth and minimal pain, I decided to go leave.

Luckily no one was outside guarding my door. I grabbed my gun and a radio slipping quietly out the door. I need to find out what everyone is doing. Walking towards the staircase I saw someone through the corner of my eye. Miller.

"Bellamy, shouldn't you be back in bed," he yelled from behind me, his footsteps getting closer by the second.

I turned to face him, keeping my face expressionless. No signs of pain. "No, they actually just radioed me to come down and help them out. You know in that room…" I slightly squinted my eyes as I looked at him.

He noticed that I trailed off and decided to finish my sentence. "Room 037. I'm glad they told you, I know they could really use your help with the interrogation." I couldn't hold back the shock in my expression. They were interrogating Alexandra without me. "You didn't know that. Did you?" Miller looked at me, his face tense. Regretful.

I turned around quickly running down the stairs. I heard Miller yelling after me, but I ignored him. If they tortured her they wouldn't get any information.

Before I knew it, I was standing outside the room. I burst through the door, my breath still trying to catch up to my body. There stood Kane, Abby, Octavia, and Clarke all turned back looking at me. Clarke's knuckles were covered with bruises and blood. Behind them sat Alexandra. Her face layered with blood and bruises.

Kane quickly stepped up to me trying to grab me and push me back. "You can't be here, Bellamy. You need to…"

"No, why didn't you include me? Why didn't you even think to tell me? Why did you keep this a secret from me? You knew she wanted to talk to me." My voice began to break as I pulled away from Kane walking towards Octavia and Clarke. Both standing side by side, completely speechless. "I thought we were a team. I thought we did everything together." Anger was seeping through my voice. Clarke stared at me, her eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"Bellamy, you are still in recovery and us…" Clarke started before Octavia cut her off.

"We can't risk your feelings get in the way. She saved you, even if you feel nothing for her you'll still be more lenient to help her because she helped you." How could Octavia ever question my integrity? I've always had our people's best interests at heart. She knew that.

"Do you really think I'm that weak? That I couldn't put my feelings aside for my people?" Clarke's face was filled with regret as she stared at me.

Eventually, she looked down at her bruised knuckles. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to talk to her before she talked to you. She loves…" A tear slipped from her eye. I couldn't hold myself back, I quickly wrapped my arms around her pulling her face into my chest. She was nearly shaking. "She loves you Bellamy, that's why I didn't want to call you. I just…I…"

"It's okay. I understand." I buried my face into her hair, taking in her scent. I looked up and found Octavia smiling at me. "Shut up. _You_ could have at least called me." I glared at her as I held Clarke in my arms. I could feel the eyes of Alexandra scanning me.

"I know I _could_ have called you. But I wanted to show you that I'm not just your little sister anymore." Her face fell as she stared at me. I couldn't help, but feel guilty. I had babied her, her entire life. She was growing up. I needed to accept that. I moved forward pulling Octavia into the other side of my chest. Clarke pulled away allowing Octavia and I to have our own embrace. She quickly pulled away and looked to the door. "Abby, Kane I don't think we'll be needing your assistance now. We'll keep you updated, go get some rest for now."

Abby stepped forward slowly rubbing my shoulder. "Okay, if you need anything just radio us. We'll send someone to stand guard outside for you all."

"Mom, do you really think we can't handle ourselves," Clarke chuckled as she wiped away her tears. We all looked to one another. Everyone's faces covered with smirks. "See we're all good." Clarke flashed her mom the gun she had stashed in the holster hiding behind her shirt. Octavia followed suit showing her machete slightly through the cover, I showed Abby the gun I had hidden in my pants.

"Right. Sometimes I forget you kids aren't just kids." Her face lightened up before she turned to Kane to leave. Their arms wrapped around one another.

I turned around as soon as they left, pulling up a chair in front of Alexandra. She was bound to the chair. "Untie her." I looked to Octavia.

She hesitated as she stared down at me. "But Bellamy…"

I lifted my eyebrow as I stared up at her. "Untie her. Now. She won't tell you anything if you treat her like a prisoner. She definitely won't trust us." Clarke and Octavia exchanged looks, but then they continued to untie her. "Besides, I'm sure you two are more than capable to take her down if she decides to attack."

I stood up grabbing a wet cloth that laid on the table. I sat back down in my chair that was set in front of the porcelain woman. I moved my chair closer, looking over at Clarke. She was glaring down at me, watching every move I made. I began to clean away the dried-up blood from the woman's face. "Are you okay?"

The woman looked me in the eyes. Her stone cold blue eyes, digging deep into mine. I didn't break eye contact as I continued to wipe her face, waiting for a response. "I'm fine."

"Okay, so what did you want to talk to me about? Why me specifically?" I kept my face emotionless. Her eyes softened as I asked her. Tears building up slowly.

She blinked them away. Looking up at Octavia and Clarke. "Not in front of them."

I looked over my shoulder at Clarke and Octavia standing shoulder to shoulder glaring down at the woman with their arms folding across their chest. I let out a small laugh. "Well, they're a part of the deal. If you want to talk to me, you have to talk to them. They're kind of my body guards." I could hear Octavia let out a small laugh. Clarke's eyes were burning into my back as I sat there running the cloth all over the woman's face. "Octavia is the leader of our people, so she has to be here to make sure everything runs smoothly. Clarke on the other hand is my..." I looked over my shoulder, her face was tense as she waited for me to finish the sentence. "Clarke is my wife. So, you must understand why I can't send them out right?"

I could see Clarke's eyes widen as she stared back and forth from my face to Octavia's. Both of them stood behind me. Dumbfounded. Alexandra's jaw dropped as she stared back and forth from Clarke's face to mine. "She's…she's your wife? But neither of you wears any rings, and you didn't mention her being your wife when you were imprisoned." She was stuttering, filled with utter confusion.

"I didn't know she was alive and as for rings, well we haven't had the chance to really work that out." Clarke's breathing became heavy behind me, I couldn't help but smile. Octavia stepped forward into my line of sight. She stared at me from behind Alexandra, her eyes wide and her mouth open. "But what do you want to talk about? Why do you want to talk to me? You haven't answered my question at all."

I threw the bloody rag onto the table, slowly scooting my chair back away from her. She began to fiddle with her fingers. "The man who tortured you, Justin Bishop, he's planning on rallying everyone together and bringing them back." She looked up scanning all of our faces. Octavia stepped back into her view. "They won't leave so easily. I don't want to be a part of any of it. That's why I wanted to talk to you, I want to integrate with you all. You all could use another doctor, right?" I heard Clarke scoff behind me.

"We have doctors, plenty. We don't need you. Besides, why should we trust anything you say?" Octavia stepped forward, her eyes were dark. Her hands tightened into fists.

"Before we let you openly walk among any of our people, we need to know we can trust you. For all we know this is a part of Bishop's plan. You infiltrate our society, gather intel, and help plan the attack." Her face grew tense with anger. She stared up at me.

"If I wanted to help them would I be here trying to tell you to kill them? It's either you let them go and they come back to kill you all or themselves or you kill them now and get it over with." She leaned down laying her face in her hands.

I turned to look up at Clarke and Octavia. Both of their faces were expressionless. "We'll run a meeting, discuss the options. Discuss the possibilities. We'll lock her up until then. Once we all decide what we're going to do, then we can move forward." Octavia glared down at Alexandra. She was staring up right back at her, her hands slowly clenching into fists.

"Okay, then tomorrow we'll talk to everyone until then Alexandra will be put back into a cell. Radio Murphy and Emori, they can take her back to her cell." I stood up. The sound of my chair sliding across the floor echoed throughout the silent room.

"Wait, please. I'll do whatever you want, just give me one minute with Bellamy alone. Please." Her hands were clasped together as she begged Clarke. Octavia scowled at me before turning to walk out the door to radio someone.

Clarke turned to me hugging me tightly. Her face buried into my neck. I closed my eyes as I held her in my arms. Before pulling away she whispered in my ears, "If she touches you, I'll kill her."

I couldn't hold back my laughter as I looked at her standing in front of me, her arms folded in front of her. She stepped forward to hit me, but before she could I grabbed her hand pulling her back into me. I leaned down kissing her cheek. "I love you too," I whispered before pulling away.

A tint of pink rushed into her cheeks before she turned to the door. I watched her leave before turning back to Alexandra. "What can I do for you?" She stood up, slowly stepping closer to me. A smile curling at the corner of her lips. Before I could react, her lips crashed into mine. I pulled her off of me before pushing her away. "Do you not understand that I'm not interested? I will never be interested. I love Clarke. The only reason I'm trying to help you is because you helped me when I was a prisoner. That's it. Nothing else." I was nearly yelling as I held her by her shoulders.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to know what it would have felt like if I was yours." She pulled away, tears running down her cheeks. "I promise, I just want to be peaceful. I won't be in the way, I won't betray you. You guys can keep me locked up forever. Just please help me."

I stared down at her, I can't believe this woman. She has no boundaries. "Let's get a few things straight. I will never be yours, ever. I don't trust you. And if you do anything to Clarke I will make sure she kills you with her bare hands. Got it?"

She continued to cry, but I didn't care. This wasn't the way to get anything. Trying to what? Seduce me? No. "I'm sorry. It'll never happen again." Her voice was breaking as she apologized.

I opened the door to leave the room, Clarke, and Octavia standing outside waiting for me to come out. They were accompanied by Murphy, Emori, Harper, and Madi. "Take her to her cell. NOW," I yelled.

Harper passed me quickly as I stepped out. Clarke grabbed my arm as I tried to walk away. I was burning with anger. I tried to relax before turning to look at Clarke. But she saw right through me. Her eyebrows crinkled as she stared at me. Her hand wrapped around my forearm. "What happened?"

I looked up at Emori, Madi, and Octavia staring at me. I looked down and gave Clarke a look. Quickly understanding what I was trying to say she turned to the 3 of them. "Madi, can you stay with Octavia tonight? I know you want to sleep with us but…"

She was cut off by Madi's squeal of excitement. "Yes! Please Octavia?" She was gripping onto Octavia's arm as she begged her. I relaxed at the thought of a night alone with Clarke. Time to talk, to vent, to just be us.

Octavia wrapped her arms around Madi. "Of course, you can sleep with me. I think you should sleep with me from now on," she laughed. A large grin plastered across her face. "You know Clarke and Bellamy barely sleep so it's best if you stay with me from now on."

"Shut up O." I rolled my eyes as I glared at her. Our laughter soon ended once Harper opened the door, guiding Alexandra out of the room. Alexandra stared at me, her eyes puffy from crying. The whites of her eyes were covered with red veins. Murphy followed her out of the door. I cleared my throat once Harper had taken her out of the hallway. "Okay, well we can eat and go to sleep. Tomorrow we'll talk about what we're going to do with these prisoners and what we're going to do about the living arrangements."

Everyone nodded as we turned to walk down to the cafeteria. I wrapped my arm around Clarke's shoulder as we walked. I need to tell her what happened. I need to be honest. It's better she hears it now from me than later from someone else.

 **Clarke:**

Bellamy hadn't told me what happened, but he seemed to have cooled off as we ate dinner. It had been a long day. Maybe he was just stressed. But regardless he'll tell me once we get into our room. It'll be nice to have Bellamy all to myself. I smiled at the thought of us being alone again.

We sat with Raven, Murphy, Emori, Octavia, and Madi eating dinner. Everyone was laughing and talking. Echo, Miller, Indra, Kane, and my mom were all asleep. It was late, and it had been a long time that we were out on the ground without any real threats. So, everyone wanted to embrace this newfound freedom.

Bellamy leaned over to me turning his head towards my ear. "Let's get out of here," he softly whispered. I felt a shock go throughout my body. I turned to look at him, he looked needy. He licked his lips slowly curling them into a smile. I rested my hand on his thigh giving him a look to reassure him that we'd leave soon.

Before he could argue Octavia stood up. "Well, I think we should all get some rest we have a long day tomorrow." Everyone nodded in agreement. We all set off in different directions to walk towards our room.

Bellamy slowly walked up behind me as we went up the stairs. His eyes burning into my back. I looked over my shoulder to see him smirking up at me. After a slow walk, down the hallway, we made it to our room. Bellamy stepped forward opening the door to our room. Before I got the chance to enter he picked me up in his arms and carried me in.

I squirmed in his arms until he dropped me flat on the bed. His lips connecting to mine. He was hovering above me, all his weight laid on his hands. After a few minutes, we finally pulled away to get some air. I ran my fingers along his jawline.

He slowly stood up, getting off me. I leaned up on my forearms watching his face filled with a million thoughts. He dropped to his knees, leaning his chest against the bed. He pulled his hands up to his forehead clasping them together. "What's wrong, Bellamy?" I quickly sat up pulling his face up to meet mine. His eyes were filled with tears.

I wiped away a tear that fell from his eye. "She…she kissed me." I pulled my hand away. Anger coursing through my body. I couldn't contain my anger. I immediately tried to get up, but Bellamy trapped my legs under his arms. His chest leaning on the mattress between my legs. "Don't. I already told her she meant nothing to me and never would."

"Bellamy, if it were Bishop who kissed me would you have let him go so easily?" I was practically yelling at him, my throat burning from the lump in my throat. I tried to fight back the tears, but I couldn't. "You're mine, Bellamy."

He looked at me, his eyes softly scanning me. "If Bishop even tried to touch you…just know it wouldn't end well. I am yours. And you're mine. Nothing and no one will change that." He grabbed my hands leaving a trail of soft kisses along the bruises of my knuckles. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he looked up at me. "You're my wife, remember Mrs. Blake?"

I felt the blood rush to my cheeks. I couldn't hold back my smile. "Why did you tell her I was your wife anyways? We're not married."

He looked back at my bruised knuckles, gently running the pad of his thumb across them. Softly making circles over them. "Maybe not yet, but as far as she's concerned you're are and always will be the only one for me."

I grabbed the edges of his neckline, pulling him up to me. Laying soft kisses to his lips as I rolled him over. Between kisses, I muttered against his lips. "I…love…you."

He smiled against my lips, mimicking me. He pulled away, his hand cupping around my cheek. His thumb caressing my face as I sat on top of him. His eyes were locked on mine. My eyes spoke to him, all the words I was too emotional and scared to say.

 _I need you._

 _I want you._

 _I never want to live without you._

 _Please, don't hurt me._

And, as if reading my mind, he responded. "I'm here. I will always be here. Stop worrying. We'll get through it all. Together." My tears fell onto his chest. He wiped away the tears that slid down my face. "I love you and I would never do anything to hurt you."

I leaned back down and kissed him. His hands running through my hair. He gripped my hair, pulling my head back so he could lay soft kisses across my jaw and down my neck. My body flowed perfectly with his. Moving in sync together. He rolled me over as we kissed we slowly began to lose our clothes. Once he took off his shirt revealing his bandaged chest I pulled away.

Running my hands along his bandages he grabbed my hand. Bringing it up to his mouth he kissed my palm. "It's okay. I'm fine." He continued to kiss my hand. "You have no idea how much I've missed you. But all I want to do is show you."

He leaned back down, his lips crashing into mine. Within minutes we came together, we were one. Our moans and groans echoing throughout the room. Bellamy knew everything I liked, he knew all my weaknesses. But I knew his too. Any time I spent with Bellamy never felt like enough. I felt my body burning against his.

Bellamy's face landed on my chest as we both finished in sync. I wrapped my arms around his face as he laid on top of me. I felt a certain comfort in having him between my arms. Having him in my bed. It was relaxing. After we caught our breath Bellamy leaned his head up on his hand looking at me. I got up to grab some of our clothes that had now been scattered all over the floor.

"Who needs clothes?" He smirked as he laid on the bed watching me pick up our clothes off the floor.

"Even if Octavia is our commander everyone still relies on us to help out, we can't have them bursting through our door to find us sleeping naked, Bellamy!" He laughed before laying onto his back. His arms shifting up under his head.

"Well, I think that's the only way they'll learn to stop barging into our room," he laughed as he looked over at me, raising an eyebrow with amusement.

"I don't think Madi would appreciate that much." I looked at our pile of clothes, slipping into some undergarments and Bellamy's shirt.

"I think that looks better on you than it does on me." Bellamy had rolled back over to get a better view. Once I got closer he grabbed my arm, instantly pulling me back into bed. "You don't need any more clothes." He placed a kiss on my lips, slowly deepening it to distract me from the task at hand.

I grabbed his boxers placing them on his chest. I pulled away from his lips. "At least put these on." He rolled his eyes while pulling on his boxers to cover himself.

"Happy? Now come on we need some sleep." I got under the covers to join him. Our legs intertwining with one another, my head resting on his chest listening to his heart pounding out of his chest. His hand began to play with mine as it laid on his chest. He placed a kiss on my forehead. "Thank you."

"For what?" I leaned back to look at his face. He was looking up at the ceiling, his head thrown back.

"Thank you for always believing in me. For never letting me feel like I was alone. You know when we first came down to Earth Octavia was the only one who cared about me. But you showed me that she wasn't my only family. You always took care of me. You still take care of me. Even when I felt like I didn't deserve to live you showed me that I did. You have always fought for me, even when I couldn't fight for myself." He tried to talk properly, but his emotions were seeping through his voice. The lump in his throat altering his usually strong and deep voice. He closed his eyes in an effort to fight back his tears, but he failed.

I ran my hand along his cheeks softly wiping away the tears that slipped through. "You've always given me something to fight for. We are a team. I couldn't do any of this without you." I wrapped my arms around his chest, laying my head back down on his shoulder giving him a tight squeeze.

He kissed my temple before he buried his face into my neck. "Goodnight Princess," he whispered.

I ran my fingers through his hair. "Goodnight Bell."

And at this moment, I felt safe. Right here. In Bellamy's arms. Completely vulnerable, but safe.


	17. Chapter 17

**My Keepers**

 **Octavia:**

There was so much on my mind and I wish I knew where to start. So many decisions to be made and I had to make them. Even though we're going to have a meeting to discuss our options the final call is up to me. And what if I make the wrong one?

I shook the thought as I got out of bed. Making sure not to wake up Madi. Boy can that girl sleep. I ran my fingers through my hair in an attempt to get out the tangles, but it was useless. When Lincoln was here I never had to worry about my hair, he always braided and ran his fingers through it until I fell asleep. I felt tears burn in my eyes, but I blinked them away. I can't mourn anymore. He wouldn't want me to. But a part of me always imagines how things would be if he were here.

I'm pulled from my thoughts by a soft knock at my door. I quietly make my way to the door to find Azuma standing outside. I slipped out the door to meet him in the hallway. Azuma was a member of my trusted guard, introduced to me through Indra. Former Trikru. He often trained with me, kept me on my toes, in more ways than one.

"What's wrong?" His face was tense with concern, his jaw flexing like it always did when he was worried about something.

"Nothing, you've just been distant. I wanted to make sure you're okay. I've been on guard and keeping my distance, but you can at least talk to me." His eyes were narrowed down at me.

"I'm sorry. I've just had a lot on my mind." He grabbed my hand pulling me into his room.

"Octavia, you've always been able to come to me about anything but ever since we got out you've been pushing me away. Why?" His hand was wrapped around my wrist, his eyes focused on mine.

"Azuma, you know no one knows about us. I've just had a lot to deal with. The attack, the prisoners, my brother, preparing for the winter. It's all so much." I grabbed his arm with my free hand. Deeply inhaling to let out some stress. "I just…I feel like this is all so much."

He sat me down at the edge of his bed. Gently caressing my cheek. I looked back up so my eyes met his. "Talk to me. Please. I just want to help."

I grabbed his wrist holding his hand in place on my cheek. "Do we let these people in or not? Do we kill them or ban them? How do we separate duties among the people? Who do I leave in charge of what?"

"Interrogate them. You can know someone's true intentions that way. If they seem trustworthy slowly let them in. Make them sleep in cells, keep them under full surveillance. The people you can't trust will be executed." A small smile tugged at the corner of my mouth. Azuma was extraordinarily smart, one of the best warriors we have. He could never replace Lincoln, no one ever could but a part of me felt safe when I'm with him.

I nodded. "You know that's not a bad idea. Some of them are doctors, engineers, miners we can really use their abilities if they're trustworthy."

"Exactly. As for separating people, think back to when we were under the bunker. Our warriors and guards can be led by you and Indra. Our doctors can be led by Abby, Jackson, and Clarke. I can help lead the hunting groups with your brother. The construction of the cabins can be led by Kane since he was a former leader. Raven and Monty can lead engineering. As for who goes with who. We have over a thousand people. Let them decide what they want to do. I'm sure there's more than enough help for everything." He let out a large breath of air as he finished.

I kissed him softly on the cheek. "Thank you." I felt him give my hand a squeeze. "I think we should tell my brother and Clarke about us."

His eyes widened as he stared at me. "What? Are you sure?" His mouth was wide open. We had discussed when and how we would tell him, but Azuma was always scared of Bellamy from the stories he heard about him.

"Yes. He's my brother and I don't want to hide anything from him. Don't worry. I'll be there to protect you." I winked up at him before getting up. I tugged at his arm as he sat in a daze. "Come on, it won't be that bad. Besides Clarke will be there."

"Clarke scares me almost as much as Bellamy does." He stood up and wrapped his arm around me.

Before he could kiss me, I turned towards the door. "That'll have to wait until after we tell Bell." He silently followed me to Bellamy and Clarke's room. His eyes focused on the floor.

We approach their door, Azuma grabs my arm before I get the chance to open the door. "Wait." He grabbed the back of my head, pulling my face towards his. He softly kissed me a smile growing on his face. "Okay, I'm ready."

I turned to the door grabbing onto the handle. "Wait here, first let me tell them. After I tell them I'll call you in." He crossed his arms and moved to the other side of the door. He leaned against the wall, his head thrown back so he was looking at the ceiling.

I let out a small chuckle before walking in. Of course, as expected I found Bellamy and Clarke in a compromising position. I rolled my eyes as I walked in. I pulled a chair up to the edge of their bed.

"Do you mind O? We're kind of in the middle of something!" Bellamy was hovering over Clarke, his arms on both sides of her.

"I need to talk to you two. Please?" He rolled off of Clarke and sat at the edge of the bed in front of me. Clarke sat next to him, thank god, they were both still wearing their clothes.

"What's wrong?" He leaned forward laying his elbows on his knees.

I smiled to reassure them. "It's nothing bad. I just wanted to talk to you about Azuma."

His eyebrows furrowed as he stared at me. His eyes narrowing down at me. Clarke set her hand on his knee to relax him. "Azuma from your guard?" Clarke raised an eyebrow looking at me. "He's a good guard, I saw him fight and he's definitely one of the best I've seen. What about him? Is he okay?"

Bellamy sat in silence waiting for me to respond. "I just want you to know that I'm…I mean Azuma and I are…we're…together." I could see Bellamy's body tense as the words fell out of my mouth.

He gave me a slight nod. "Well, if you're happy then I'm happy." I couldn't hide the shock in my face. I smiled quickly wrapping my arms around him. I hugged Clarke before running to the door. I cracked the door and waved Azuma in.

Bellamy glared at him before standing up to shake his hand. Bellamy and Clarke may not have noticed, but I could see the anxiety and stress beaming through Azuma's eyes. I let out a small laugh. "I've heard so much about you, it's nice to finally meet you myself."

"I know O is the commander now, but she will always be my baby sister and I will always do anything to protect her." Bellamy glared down at Azuma, a slight smirk on his face.

Clarke softly hit Bellamy's chest. "Bellamy!" She burst into laughter. "I'm sure if he does anything to hurt he Octavia could kill him herself." She rolled her eyes. We all began laughing.

We spent a few minutes talking about Azuma and how we got together. We'd been good friends for 4 years, but being just friends wasn't enough. He was a great supporter and a very loyal guard. I guess our chemistry was always there it just took some time for me to accept it.

"Well, we'll leave you two. I need to get everyone else ready for the meeting. Can you two meet us in the meeting chambers in 10 minutes?" They both nodded. Azuma and I quickly turned and left the room.

I began to head down the hallway when he grabbed my arm. He pulled me to his chest leaning down to kiss me. Our kiss got deeper before I realized we were standing in the middle of the hallway. I pushed myself away, trying to catch my breath. "Go get Indra, Kane, Abby, Jackson, Monty, and Raven. I need them to meet me in the meeting chambers. After you send them all my way go get some sleep, I know you haven't slept properly in days." He nodded before doing as he was told.

In the first few years I would have never imagined myself to have moved on. But things have changed, I have changed. Lincoln will always be a part of me, Azuma has always understood that. But he was never intimidated by it. Although, everyone else treated me different Azuma and Indra were the only two in the bunker that had treated me like me. It was relaxing to know I wasn't alone anymore. I had Azuma, Bellamy, Clarke, and Madi. I had a family.

 **Bellamy:**

Our meeting ended sooner than we had anticipated. Everyone quickly filed out of the room except Clarke, Octavia, and I.

"O you did good today." She had a soft smile on her face. Octavia rarely smiled anymore, but from what Azuma has told me she's been a lot happier since they got out of the bunker.

"Thanks, I can't take credit for it all though Azuma helped me with a lot of it." Octavia's smile grew wider. A small dimple appearing on her right cheek.

"Well that's good you always need someone to keep you balanced when you're leading." I looked over to Clarke who was leaning against the table with a smirk on her face. I still remember Jaha trying to tell me that I kept her centered, but really it was always her. She kept me centered. She kept me sane.

"Are you going to go talk to Bishop?" Octavia's expression changed almost immediately. Her smile fading. Her face growing tense as she stared at me. Clarke's face tensed as well, she still hasn't told me what they did to her. But I wasn't sure if I was even ready for her to tell me. If I find out I may just want to kill him immediately.

Clarke took a deep breath before responding. "I think we need to take a few different people out for interrogation before we actually approach him. So far the only one we've questioned is Alexandra so it'll be obvious that she gave him away." She folded her arms in front of her.

"That's true. I think we should talk to her again," Octavia suggested.

"I think we should talk to her and Bellamy should stand outside of her cell. We can discuss the terms of our agreement." Clarke was glaring at me, I couldn't hide my smile. Clarke was definitely jealous. Overprotective even. Was this how O felt when I stopped her from doing things?

"What? Why?" Octavia glanced from my face to Clarke's, her eyes wide with shock. "Did she come on to you Bell?"

"Yes, yes, she did," Clarke mumbled. She rolled her eyes.

"She's obsessed. We need to keep her as far away from you as possible." Octavia stepped forward placing her hand on my shoulder, slightly pushing it back.

"She's mentally unstable. She thinks she's in love with me, but she doesn't even really know anything about me. If she knew me she would hate me." I grabbed Octavia's hand pulling it down. Clarke's eyebrows moved together, the little wrinkle she gets when she's angry formed above her nose.

"None of us hate you. Why would she be any different?" Clarke's voice was clearly full of anger, but she clearly didn't care to hide her feelings about her.

"Because she hasn't ever lived on the ground. She can't handle torture. She can't handle violence. It's clear. She fears it." I turned to face her, my hand running up and down her arm trying to calm her down.

She pulled away. "I don't think so. She held a scalpel to my neck Bellamy."

"Well, you killed a grounder guard when they took you and Finn. It's about survival instincts." I couldn't hold back my laugh at the thought of Clarke fighting off a grounder guard. She brought her focus back to me, the wrinkle growing larger.

"Why are you defending her Bellamy?" She was almost yelling. I was taken back by her tone, so full of anger.

"I'm not, I just think she needs to be given a chance." I shrug before grabbing both of Clarke's hands.

"You've changed so much since we first landed on the ground," Octavia said.

"Well, that's what 6 years in space will do to you. I'm usually just using my heart, but I guess I've been using my head more." A small made its way across Clarke's face as she relived the memory. When she gave me her little speech. Her speech helped me become a better leader, not just now but up in space too.

Octavia silently turned towards the door, she radioed Azuma to bring Alexandra to the interrogation room. Clarke followed quickly behind her. I slowly made my way behind them. They were clearly angry and I did not want to get caught in the crossfire. We finally reached the interrogation room to find Alexandra sitting silently in the middle.

Her face was still very bruised. Her eyes, nose, and the corners of her mouth were a shade of purple. Her lips were swollen and looked tender. Her eyes were really swollen too, her blue eyes barely shining through the small gap. I must admit Clarke did some major damage. Octavia definitely helped as well.

Octavia put on a fake smile moving towards her. "Alexandra. Glad you could join us. Time to discuss some terms." Her tone was rather happy, unexpected.

"Terms? For what?" Alexandra's face tightened. She looked back and forth from Octavia to Clarke. Her eyes occasionally meeting mine.

"Terms for letting you join us." Clarke spoke with such disgust. Her arms were crossed in front of her as she stared down at her. Her eyes were threatening. I stood off to the side. If something goes wrong I'll step in, but I'd rather just keep my opinions to myself.

"Yes. Anything. What do you want me to do?" Desperation spilling from her tongue. She looked at me, staring for too long. I looked at Clarke to avoid her gaze. Clarke stared back at me once she noticed Alexandra was staring at me. I gave her a small smirk as she glared at me. Her face slowly softened as she stared at me.

Clarke turned back to Alexandra. Her face hardening once again. "Well for starters we'll need you to live in your cell for a few months. It'll be your room. It makes it easier for us to watch over you. Transparency is best considering we can't fully trust you yet." Clarke was intimidating. The way she talked, the way she looked at you, even the way she stood was intimidating. But it was what I loved most about her. She was fearless.

"Yeah, of course." Alexandra didn't break eye contact with Clarke, clearly challenging her. But this was a fight she would surely lose.

Octavia continued on. "You can't go anywhere alone. You can't have access to any technology. No radios. No computers. Nothing. You are allowed to work in our medical bay with Abby and Jackson and their apprentices, but that's it. You cannot leave without notice. And you will be accompanied by a guard who will watch you at all times." Octavia was calm, a little too calm. Maybe she knew Clarke was going to be reckless and decided they needed one person to be calm. Or maybe she's just become really good at hiding her feelings.

"That's a bit extreme don't you think?" Alexandra's face tensed. Her eyebrows raised as she glanced over Octavia's face.

"If you can't agree to our terms then you'll die with the rest," Clarke spoke almost instantly. Killing Alexandra is exactly what she wants, but she knows why we shouldn't.

"Fine. Okay. I don't care. Will I be able to interact with other people?" She quickly glanced over at me, I shifted to stand behind Clarke. It was best if I just stay out of it all.

"You are allowed to interact with the people you work with." Octavia's voice became a little more intense. Some nervousness pulling over her, or maybe anger.

"Can I talk to any of you?" Alexandra's voice was almost a whisper. She was intimidated. But what could I say? The two women in my life were strong, independent, and fearless. If they weren't my family I would be scared of them too.

"You can talk to Octavia and me, but you can only talk to Bellamy with one of us around. If we see you talking to him without one of us there you will be put on probation." I tried to hide my grin, but I couldn't help it. Clarke wanted to make it as clear as day that she was not going to tolerate her moves anymore. I wasn't going to either. I already told her I would let Clarke kill her if she tried anything. I'm sure that would make Clarke happy.

"Why? What's probation?" Alexandra's eyes shifted down to the floor, her fingers twiddling in front of her.

"You and I both know why. Probation means a week in solitary. You won't talk to anyone. You won't see anyone. You'll be given good and access to a bathroom, but that's it." Clarke's tone shifted. She almost sounded calm. Like she was talking to a child.

"Do you agree to our terms?" Octavia moved closer to her, glaring down at her with her arms folded in front of her.

"What do you think about this Bellamy?" Alexandra's eyes moved up to meet mine. Clarke and Octavia turned towards me. Clarke's hands shifted to her waist. Her foot tapping on the ground in front of her.

I cleared my throat, slowly taking a step back and folding my arms. "I think the only reason you're even getting a chance to try this out is because you saved my life. That's it. Agree to it or don't I don't care." Alexandra's eyes fell back to the floor. Clarke's narrowed her eyes at me before turning back to Alexandra.

"Okay. I agree," she whispered.

"Good. We start our work tomorrow. Get some rest and we'll introduce you to the medical bay staff tomorrow," Octavia ordered. She turned back towards me, walking towards the door.

As we all began to turn towards the door Alexandra cleared her throat. "Before you leave can I talk to Bellamy?" Her voice was low, but clear. I rolled my head back, why me? I could feel Clarke's eyes burning through my back.

"Alone? I don't think so," Clarke turned back looking down at Alexandra. Her foot tapping with anger. Her hands were balled up in fists. If I weren't here she would have definitely hit her.

"He can stand behind the bars, I just want to talk." She was begging again. Why did she want to talk to me? All I was here for was to make sure Clarke was okay. Make sure she didn't lose her temper. Make sure the terms were reasonable.

"Fine, but if you try anything we'll execute you right here, right now." Octavia's voice was threatening, and so was the look she was giving Alexandra.

"I'll kill you myself," Clarke threatened. Her tone was serious. I'm sure if she wants to survive she'll listen.

"Okay, I won't. I promise." She waited for them to turn and leave out the door before smiling. A small smile creeping on her face.

"Bellamy." Her tone was lighter.

"Alexandra." I maintained a strict voice. I don't want her to get the wrong idea. She's been on this prison transport ship for who knows how many years. She probably doesn't even know what love is. She probably doesn't even realize what real love feels like. I know before I came down I didn't. That's why I slept with any girl willing to get into bed with me.

"Can you just tell me one thing?" Her eyebrows raised as she looked up at me. Her eyes soft.

"What?" I could hear the annoyance in my voice, but she didn't deserve anything else. She was as bad as the clingy girls I slept with when we first landed. The girls who secretly hated Clarke. No, I think Alexandra is way worse. At least those girls had the decency to back off once they realized I loved Clarke. I told this woman I was married to her and she still didn't care.

She looked from her hands to me. Almost whispering. "If you weren't with Clarke…"

"No. No. Not at all. Don't even think about it." I couldn't hold back my anger. If I wasn't with Clarke I still would never pick her. I don't even know her. I still don't trust her. Why would I get with someone like that?

"I just needed to know. But I understand. I'll keep my distance. I'm sorry." She looked back down at her fingers. A tear slipping from her eye.

"You should be. Why don't you understand that I am not and never will be interested in you?" The anger oozed out of me. I hadn't done anything to her. Why does she think I'd be interested? She kissed me, but I didn't kiss her back. She forced herself on me. The closest she's got to me was when she had to do surgery to me or had to fix my wounds for me.

She stood up, stepping closer to the bars. Her expression was light again. "Because the way we connected when I was fixing your wounds. The way you mumbled 'I love you' incoherently in your sleep. It just felt right."

I rolled my eyes. If Clarke were here to hear this she would have her head on a platter. "When you were fixing my wounds, I was imagining you as Clarke the whole time. She's also one of our doctors, so don't act like you're vital to our survival because you're not. She's the best we have. And if I was mumbling 'I love you' in my sleep it was because I was probably having a dream about my wife. I hadn't seen her for 6 years so I dreamed about her a lot. Then you took me away from her. I will never be in love with you." I did have dreams about Clarke, more than anything else. I dreamed more of Clarke than I did my sister or my mom. She's come to mean a lot to me over the years. We spent more years apart than together, but still she was all I ever thought about. She consumed my thoughts.

"I understand. I apologize." She stepped back towards the chair in the center of the room. I stepped back turning towards the door. As the door was almost shut I heard her whisper. "I love you Bellamy." I felt a shock go through my body. I felt disgusted. She really need some psychological help before we let her treat any of our people. She may have just lost her mind.


	18. Chapter 18

**Naive**

 **Clarke:**

I made my way down the corridor, cells on both sides. People stood against the bars of their cells staring at me. I looked over to Octavia who was completely unfazed by the stares. I guess she had gotten used to it since she stayed in the bunker all eyes were on her.

As we made it closer to the door I heard a familiar voice come from one of the cells. A sarcastic, taunting tone. "Well, well, well what do we have here?" I turned to find Justin Bishop staring right back at me. He was isolated in his cell. I looked him up down, his mouth curled into a sinister smile. "I hear you've been questioning people. Why don't you just come to the source of it all? The man who knows all." He raised an eyebrow staring down at me, his fingers wrapped around the bars between us.

Octavia stood beside me, watching him and his intentions. I stepped closer. "And what makes you think you're so special?"

"I know this ship inside and out. I know every single person on this ship. If you need information from anyone, it's me." He stood slightly taller, his confidence growing as he stared at me. His eyes were locked onto mine. It was like Octavia wasn't even there. "But if you're going to question me it has to be just you and me unrestrained in a room with no weapons and no guards."

Octavia scoffed. His eyes shifted from me to Octavia. She stepped forward her body language threatening his. I felt a presence behind me. A strong, overprotective yet warm presence. Bellamy. His eyes burned into the back of me, but I didn't turn to him. I focused my attention on Bishop. "I don't think so." Bellamy's deep voice was bursting with anger. I looked over my shoulder to see him standing behind me with his arms folded in front of him. His eyes narrowed on Bishop. All the muscles in his body flexed with anger, his fists curled into balls.

"Of course, how could I forget? The princess's knight in shining armor. Nice to see you again Bellamy." He raised an eyebrow looking at him. His body was still relaxed and his smile grew wider as he took in Bellamy's anger.

Bellamy stepped in front of me, nudging me behind him. Bishop and Bellamy were staring down at one another. Bellamy's eyes full of anger, but Bishop's eyes were full of mockery. "If anyone is going to question you, it's going to be. I'll show you what real torture feels like." I stepped to the side between Octavia and Bellamy gently pressing my hand against Bellamy's back in an attempt to relax him. He kept his eyes on Bishop even as I moved to his side.

Bishop's eyes shifted from Bellamy to me. He looked me up and down. "As long as Clarke is there, then I don't care. But I'll only answer to her." His smile had become softer as he stared at me.

"Fine. Bellamy and I will take him into the interrogation room, Octavia you can get things ready for tomorrow." I broke my eye contact with Bishop to look over at Octavia who stood silently. Her face tense with anger as she looked at him.

"No, I'm going to be there too. I'm the commander so all interrogations go through me." I nodded before turning my attention back to Bishop.

His eyes were wide, his mouth slightly open. "I thought you were the leader Clarke?"

I let out a little laugh. "I was. But Octavia is much more equipped for the job, she's much more aggressive than I am when it comes to getting what she wants." I raised an eyebrow as I looked at him. A smile tugging at the corner of my mouth.

"Fine, but like I said before I will only answer to you. No weapons. No restraints." His voice was almost shaking and his face was growing tenser.

Bellamy let out a slight chuckle. "We'll see what we can do. Clarke, O you two go to the meeting chambers. I'll get him into the interrogation room."

"No. Murphy and Miller will take him. You're coming with us," Octavia responded. Her voice stern. He nodded and we all turned towards the door.

Bellamy protectively wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we left. Looking over his shoulder to make sure Bishop was watching. Octavia stayed behind to talk to the guards at the door. Bellamy and I made our way down the hall to the meeting chambers.

As soon as the door closed Bellamy turned to me. His face was tense, but sad. He inhaled deeply before stepping closer but not touching me. "I don't know what he did to you when he tortured you, but you don't have to do this."

I shifted my weight from one foot to the other as the memories of what he did to me flooded my head. If Bellamy hadn't gotten me out of there then there was no way of knowing how far he was willing to go to get what he wanted. I shook the thoughts away as I focused my attention back on Bellamy. I lifted my hand up to softly squeeze his shoulder. "I'll be fine. It's okay."

His body began to relax as he stared down at me. "What did he do to you Clarke? When you came out you were…" He paused to take a deep breath, shaking his head as he looked around the room. "You were covered in blood, bruises, and scars all across your chest. I just…I don't…"

"It's okay. This just gives me the chance to even the score." He slightly laughed at my half-joke.

We stood there and stared at each other until Octavia broke our silence. "Okay, what are we going to do? Personally, I think we should do to him what he did to you." She sat down at the end of the table. "Miller, Murphy, and Azuma are in there with him. I told Monty and Raven to double up on security in case this is some sort of trap. So, we shouldn't have any issues."

I sat down across from Octavia. "We'll start with a few basic questions first to make sure that he's willing to give us what we want. Then we'll get into security and supplies. We'll pick at everything he knows. The more we know the better." Bellamy stood on the side of the room staring off into a distance, deep in thought. Octavia sat at the other end of the table sharpening her sword as she thought about what I said.

She stopped sharpening her sword to look up at me. "What was the name of that woman you used to trade in Clarke? She's one of our prisoners, right?"

"Her name is Vanessa Bishop, Justin Bishop's baby sister," Bellamy responded. His eyes focusing on Octavia. "We can use her for leverage. He clearly cares for her."

Octavia jumped up. "Exactly, if he doesn't answer our questions we'll use her." She quickly picked up the radio and left to the hallway.

I stood up, making my way towards Bellamy. Trying to pull him away from his thoughts. I rested my hand on his arm, his eyes immediately shooting to mine. "Let me go in first, I want to talk to Bishop alone first."

His eyes widened as he stared down at me. He rested his hand on my shoulder. "No. Everything, we do, we do together remember?"

"I left you alone with Alexandra. Why is this any different?" He took his hand off my shoulder, his hands immediately clenching into fists.

He looked away, trying to avoid looking at me. "Alexandra didn't torture us. Bishop did." His eyes found their way back to mine, glossy with unshed tears. "I've seen the way he looks at you Clarke. I don't trust him"

I was taken back. I knew he was sick, but why did Bellamy think I couldn't handle myself. "Bellamy, I've fought my own battles before. I can do it now too. I don't need you to fight for me." His jaw clenched as he stared at me. "I'm no damsel in distress. I'm a fighter."

"I never said you were. I'm talking to the woman who was once the commander of death. I know you can fight for yourself." A slight smirk found its way onto his face. Immediately relaxing his face.

I reached into my pocket feeling the small knife I had hidden away. "Then trust me. If he tries anything I'll use this." I pulled the knife from my pocket. Running my fingers along the initials carved into the side.

Bellamy's face lit up with excitement as he stepped forward taking the knife from me. "Does this say B.B? Where'd you find it?"

Octavia stepped back in interrupting Bellamy's excitement. "Let's go everyone's ready."

I grabbed the knife from Bellamy's hands and turned to Octavia. "You two sit with Vanessa, I'm going to talk to Bishop first. See what I can get out of him."

Octavia froze as she looked at me. Anger spreading throughout her face. "I don't think so. You're not going in there alone."

Bellamy stepped between Octavia and I stealing her attention. "It's okay O. If she gets good information then it'll be better for us. We have leverage. I'll stand outside to make sure everything is okay."

Octavia nodded as we made our way out of the room. I gave Bellamy's hand a squeeze before I walked into the room. Murphy, Miller, and Azuma's heads instantly turning to look at me.

"Where's Octavia and Bellamy?" Miller asked. His eyebrows raised as he stared down at me.

"I'm going to talk to Bishop alone first, then they can join us." Confusion crossed all their faces, but they agreed to leave. Bishop sat in the middle of the room, a large smile across his face. Once everyone was gone I took a few steps closer, folding my arms in front of me. His eyes followed my every move. "What do you want Bishop? Why do you want my people?"

"I want you." The words slipped from his mouth laced with a disturbing tone. My mouth opened as I stared down at him. He stood up slowly, but I was frozen. Taking a few steps closer, he was inches away from me. But I couldn't get myself to move away or react. "I know, even if you're not the leader, that you're the strongest. I'm the strongest of my people. Together we can make good things happen."

My blood was boiling within me. His face was inches from mine as he looked down at me. I stepped back, swinging my hand back with me. As my hand swung forward to meet his face he grabbed my wrist, pulling me closer. I tried to use my free hand to attack, but he grabbed that too. I brought my knee to his groin. He released both my hands immediately falling to the floor. I pressed my foot against his neck. He laid underneath me groaning in pain. "You're weak. You would only hold us back." Before taking my foot off his neck I spit on his face. "And get one thing through your head. I would never make a deal with someone like you."

Just as I pulled my foot from his neck I heard a laugh from behind me. I whipped my head around to see Bellamy staring at me. His body leaning against the frame of the door, his arms folded across his chest, and a large smirk plastered across his face. I glared at him. He immediately raised his hands up in defeat as he stepped into the room. Silently smiling in the corner.

Octavia walked in shortly after, a slight smile tugging at her face. "Weapons were all you had, but without it all you're defenseless. Maybe we won't have to kill you." Octavia stepped up behind Bellamy, her eyebrow raised.

Bishop wiped his face slowly getting up behind me. I turned to Bellamy and Octavia tilting my head to one side. "Now that I've had my alone time with Bishop let's get to business."

I turned back to Bishop who quickly grabbed me and wrapped his arm around my neck. Bellamy and Octavia stepped forward their faces filled with concern. I shook my head as I backed up with Bishop. I slowly slipped the knife out of my pocket before he pinned my arms behind my back. "You think you're stronger than me? But you've got so much to learn."

I pushed my weight against him, slamming his head into the wall. Quickly swinging my leg around to take him down. Once I got him on the floor I held my knife to his throat. "Try that again and I'll make you suffer."

Bellamy stepped forward grabbing Bishop by the collar of his shirt. Pushing him back into the chair that sat in the middle of the room. His hands immediately balling back into fists. "Touch her again, I dare you," he whispered before grabbing my arm and pulling me outside. The hallway was full of guards. All of who's attention turned to me. Bellamy looked down at me. His eyes bursting with anger. "You take a few minutes out here. Let me talk to him." As much as I feared what he would do to him if he were alone with him, I guess he couldn't be much worse than I was to Alexandra.

I nodded and he quickly turned to the door making his way inside. Octavia came out almost instantly. I leaned my weight against the wall slowly sliding down to the floor. My head thrown back to relax.

 **Bellamy:**

Seeing Clarke take Bishop down was nothing short of amusing. Clarke could handle herself, I've always known that she was a smart fighter. But now it was my turn to ask the questions. I headed into the interrogation room. Octavia's eyes shot up to me. I nodded at her to leave. She hesitated before slipping out the door.

Bishop sat in the middle of the room. His face hardened. I could feel my nails digging into my palm as I stared down at him. "How about you tell me what you were thinking when you attacked Clarke? You know she's one of our strongest leaders and fighters. So, what made you think you could take her down?" He shifted in his chair. Still not saying anything. "What? You can't say anything now? You were so confident with your arm around Clarke. What happened now?" The more I mocked him the better reaction I'd get out of him. I want him to try to hit me.

"She may be strong, but you're not. That's why you take orders from a bunch of little girls." He looked up at me. A slight smile on his face. "At least I ran this ship and all the people in it."

"Clearly not very well if these _little girls_ took you down. How strong of a leader does that make you?" He instantly stood up his hands balling into fists. "You and your people are weak."

"That won't stop me from getting what I want." He stepped closer to me, his face hardening as he got closer. He was the same height as me. He had an athletic build, but he was still weaker than I was. He wasn't equipped to fight without weapons.

"What do you want?" I narrowed my eyes. Folding my arms in front of him.

"Clarke." He raised his eyebrow. I immediately punched him in the face. Blood running down the corner of his mouth. He got up wiping his mouth off as he stood up in front of me once again. "You're protective of that one. Aren't you?" I remained silent. I could feel my jaw clenching harder and my teeth biting down harder on one another. He was trying to get under my skin. I couldn't let him get to me.

"I'm as protective of Clarke as you are Vanessa." His smile faded, his face immediately hardening.

"Keep her out of this." He stepped closer. Trying to threaten me, but I remained unfazed.

"You didn't keep my sister out of it, so why should I keep yours out of it?" He was taken back by my response. Stepping back, his eyes running around the room.

"Octavia is your sister. Isn't she?" His brows were furrowed as he looked back at me. "Are all of the women amongst you like Octavia and Clarke?"

I wrapped my hands around his neck, pinning him against the wall. I heard the door open and I was quickly being pulled away. Before I was out of reach I swung and punched Bishop once more. Clarke and Octavia rushed into the room. Murphy and Miller held both of my arms as they pulled me to the corner of the room. I pulled myself out of their grip relaxing myself as I stood there.

Clarke stepped towards me taking my hand in hers as she examined my slowly bruising knuckle. "Bell…" she whispered as she stared down at my hand. I gave her fingers a slight squeeze as I stared at her. She turned back towards Bishop immediately pinning his shoulders against the wall. "Whatever plan you had going ends now." Plan? What plan? "Bring her in."

Harper brought in Vanessa. She was gagged and both of her hands were tied behind her back. Her face covered in bruises from when Madi took her down. I stood there and watched as Harper sat her down on another chair. "No. Stop. I'll answer whatever you need me to, just don't bring her into this." Clarke let him go, but he was immediately taken down by Octavia. He groaned in pain staring up at his sister.

"Good. Answer our questions and we won't hurt her." Octavia pulled him up by his shirt and pushed him into the other chair. The room was nearly full. Harper, Azuma, Murphy, Miller, Octavia, and Clarke. "Now tell me, where are your remaining guards? They were in the cells, but mysteriously disappeared once we brought you here."

He remained quiet sitting there contemplating whether or not to answer. I turned to Miller, but he just gave me a reassuring nod. Clearly, they had to have some sort of plan besides just asking him. There's way too many of us to just let them go. Clarke pulled out my pocket knife from her pocket and brought it to Vanessa's chest. Bishop's eyes widened as he stared at her. Vanessa whimpered, but was completely helpless. Clarke dug into her skin, mimicking the same lines they had once made on her chest.

A tear dropped down Bishop's face as he watched his sister in pain. How could you watch your sister suffer like that? What kind of sick person did you have to be to let that happen? Knowing it's your fault that your sister was in pain?

"We can go all day Bishop. Tell us where your men are or this just gets worse," Octavia demanded. She gave Clarke a slight nod. She turned her attention back to Vanessa running the knife across her chest once again.

"Okay. Okay. I'll tell you. Just stop." Tears fell down his face as he stared at his sister. Her chest covered in blood. "One of the cells has access to the vents. We usually keep it empty, but you didn't know so you occupied it with prisoners." His voice was breaking.

Suddenly the sound of the alarms went off around the ship. The echo of the alarm drowned out any other sound. I looked around the room, stepping forward to grab Bishop. Before I got the chance to do anything, I was pinned to the ground with a knife held to my neck. I looked around the room to find Clarke being taken by Bishop. He pushed her in front of himself with a scalpel held against her neck. Even as a hostage Clarke showed no signs of distress. She gave me one last glance before leaving the room. I felt tears burn in my eyes, but I immediately pushed them back. This was no time to be weak. Octavia was pinned down beside me by Vanessa.

The room was filled with prisoners. I slowly reached for the knife Clarke dropped when she was being taken. The man above me was giving directions to the other prisoners in the room. I took that chance to attack. Running my knife along his carotid. Immediately sending his body into shock. I rolled over kicking a guard off Miller so he could help me.

A shot echoed through the room, almost muting the sound of the alarm. A warning shot. I jumped forward grabbing the gun, hitting him in the face with the butt of the gun disarming him immediately. I pointed my gun to Vanessa's temple as she sat on top of Octavia. "Off. Now. If anyone makes any moves I'll shoot her." Everyone slowly moved into the corner of the room. Vanessa rolled off of Octavia laying on her back. My gun was focused on her forehead. "Drop your weapons and slide them over."

Miller, Azuma, Murphy, Harper, and Octavia stepped forward taking their weapons. "Check them for more," Octavia demanded as she took a few steps to stand beside me. Everyone stepped forward checking them for more weapons.

She moved forward to kick at Vanessa when in one swift motion Azuma ran over and pinned her against the wall. "Not like this." She immediately calmed down as he stood in front of her. "We'll make our move, but not yet. We need to get our people together first."

She nodded before moving towards me again. "You stay here. We're going to make sure everyone else is okay. Try to find out where they could have gone. I need to radio someone to see who has eyes on them," she whispered softly. She turned to Vanessa. "Put her in the corner with the others."

She turned towards the doors and made her way-out Azuma following closely behind her. I took a deep breath before pulling Vanessa off the floor throwing her in the corner. "Where did they take her?" Everyone stayed silent looking at one another's faces. "I'll ask you again. Where did they take her?" Everyone remained silent. I grabbed Vanessa pulling a knife to her chest like Clarke did. "Answer my question or your princess gets it."

A man stepped out of the corner of the room. "We don't know where they went. Our only order was to get them out of here."

I punched the wall. Rubbing the sweat off my face as I looked at the wall. How could I let this happen? How could I be so naive? It was obvious Bishop was just distracting us. And we fell right into his trap. I let this happen. I should have known better. Now Clarke is gone and we're under attack. I turned and grabbed the radio from the table, put my knife in my pocket, and grabbed Vanessa. This was my fault and only I could fix it.


	19. Chapter 19

**Karma**

 **Octavia:**

How could I let this happen? Why wasn't I more careful? Now we've lost Clarke and I don't know what to do. I made my way towards the security room to meet Raven and Monty Azuma by my side. I felt a little sense of comfort with him by my side, at least I wasn't completely alone. He was always good about coming up with a good plan.

I burst through the door of the security room to find Raven pacing and Monty working on the security. "What do we have so far? What are we doing? Do we have any idea where they went?"

Raven stopped pacing looking up at me, her face tense. She began rubbing her temples. "No, they know this ship inside and out, there's no way of knowing where they could possibly be."

Monty looked up slightly giving me a reassuring nod. "Well, I've shut down any chance of them getting out so as long as we scan every inch of this place I'm sure we'll find them. The security system is working as it should. I just locked everything down so you can't get anywhere unless you have one of these key cards."

Azuma stepped in front of me taking a look at the cards Monty had set on the table. "I'll get our fighters together and I'll distribute the cards to all essential personnel." He turned to me, looking for permission. I gave him a nod, he instantly turned around picking up a few cards. "We'll get him." He squeezed my shoulder before turning to leave.

"Okay. I told Miller, Harper, Murphy, and Bellamy to find out whatever they can from the prisoners they have. I radioed Indra to get our guard grouped together. Kane and Abby are on their way. They just locked down medical bay so they should be here soon." Raven stood there twiddling with her fingers. Deep in thought.

"They've taken out a lot of our main cameras. We need to send people out now." Her eyes met mine, her brows furrowed.

"We need a plan, we can't go in blind. I need to make sure they don't have any weapons first." I knew we had more than equipped fighters, but we couldn't make any hasty decisions. Clarke would never go into a situation like this blind. She would have planned everything out before going in. Going in aware of all the things that could go wrong.

Abby and Kane burst through the door. "What happened?" I exchanged a sad look with Monty and Raven before turning back to Abby. "What? Tell me."

"Bishop. He broke out and took Clarke with him." Abby's eyes fell. She gripped onto Kane's arm trying to remain balanced. "We're going to get her Abby. Trust me."

"What's the plan? How can we help?" Kane asked.

"We're going to sweep the area. Azuma and Indra are getting everything together. We don't have eyes on them because they took out a lot of our cameras. So, we're just going to have to go in after we find out if they are armed or not." I felt a lump grow in my throat. How could I send the guard out to fight if I wasn't there with them?

"Where are they? I'll go with them," Kane shifted his weight from one foot to another as he looked at Abby. She stared off blankly as she stood there, in deep thought.

"No. I need you to go to Bellamy. Make sure he stays where he is." I don't want him to do anything he'll regret. This was my turn to protect him. He needs to let me do this for him.

Kane stepped forward throwing his arms in the air. "Why? Bellamy is one of our best and you know he won't sit still while Clarke is in danger." He put his hands on his hips as he stared down at me. Complete shock across his face. But I knew he was right. Bellamy wasn't going to sit around. If it were Azuma I wouldn't either. I would have Bishop's head.

I began to speak focusing on my tone trying to hide my doubt. "I know, but…"

Kane quickly interrupted me. "Look I know you're trying to protect him because he's your brother but I know he's not going to sit and wait."

I nodded at him, folding my arms in front of me. "You're right. Abby, you stay here with Raven and Monty I'll radio you if we need you." Her eyes shifted from the wall behind me slowly focusing on mine. She gave me a slight nod moving towards the chair in the corner of the room. "You go get Bellamy and meet me down in the mess hall I need to go over the plan with our people."

Kane nodded turning towards Abby. I moved towards the table picking up one of the key cards. "Radio me if you find out anything new."

I turned on my heels quickly making my way out of the room. As I got closer to the end of the hallway I heard soft voices and footsteps coming from around the corner. I whipped out my sword, the sound of it sliding against the sheath echoing throughout the hall. The voices went silent. I slowly creeped around the corner bending my legs slightly prepared to fight anyone who got in my way.

Once I made it around the corner I found Emori standing with Madi both of their weapons held in front of them. I let out a large sigh. "Get her into the security room. The prisoners got out."

Emori tightened her grip on her knife. Madi's eyes focused on me. Analyzing my face. I remained emotionless, if she knew Clarke were gone she would want to get her too. Right now, is not the time. "What aren't you telling us?" Madi asked. Her forehead slowly creasing as she narrowed her eyes on me.

"Nothing. Do as I say." I quickly moved past them making my way to the stairs. I shook the guilt I felt lying to Madi, but Bishop would target her if he knew what she meant to Clarke.

Clarke already had enough to worry about. I continued on down the stairs. The sound of chatter growing louder as I got closer to the mess hall. I rested my hand on the handle of the door. Taking a deep breath. Being the leader was fine until all eyes were on you for everything. I needed to be prepared to answer a lot of questions. Why did I let them get out? How did they get out? How could I be so careless? How many people are missing? How will I fix it?

On more deep breath and I walked in. The room fell silent as I walked in. My head held high. Indra and Azuma stood in front of the crowd their heads held with confidence. Their hands resting behind their back as they watched me walk towards them. I stepped on top of a table gaining leverage above everyone.

All eyes were on me. I focused on keeping my face expressionless. I'd grown to be good at that. The less I gave away, the better. They needed to think I knew what I was doing and that was all that mattered. "I know what you're all thinking. How did these prisoners get out? How could we let this happen? But right now, those questions don't matter. What we need to focus on right now is showing our strength. They took our silence for weakness, but now we must show them how strong we can really be." The crowd began to cheer. Parts of the crowd were more excited than others, and parts of the crowd were more concerned than others. My eyes felt on Bellamy standing in the corner of the room his arms folded in front of him, his face tense and concerned. "They may know this ship better than us, but we have something they don't. We have people, we have fighters, we have the strength to take these prisoners down." There were more cheers throughout the crowd. "Let's sweep this ship and show them what we're capable of."

Everyone turned towards the door slowly filing out. Their chatter filling the room. I turned my attention back to Bellamy who had made his way towards me. Jumping off the table I landed in front of him. "Do you really think they're still on the ship?" He folded his arms in front of his chest.

"Monty locked down the doors, there's no way out." I put my hand on his shoulder, looking up to meet his dark eyes. "We'll get her back."

Bellamy gave me a weak fake smile before turning to Kane taking out his gun as he walked away. I couldn't help but feel guilty for this. This was my fault. I let my guard down. I got too comfortable. I should've known better.

I felt a warm hand rest on my shoulder, lightly squeezing me. I rested my hand on top of it as I stared at Bellamy walking away. I knew it was Azuma. "It's not your fault. You couldn't have known," he whispered beside me. He always knew what I was thinking without me having to say anything.

I turned to him. His hand quickly fell by his side as he stared down at me. "I could have known if I would have kept my guard up. I am the commander. This _is_ my fault."

Indra stepped forward her face slightly soft. "A warrior doesn't dwell on things she cannot change. We must focus on what we can do." I gave her a nod turning to walk behind the rest of the crowd of people in the hallway.

Indra was right. I needed to focus if I wanted to fix any of this. Once I get to Bishop I'll have his head. He doubted my strength as a leader, but it was time to show him what I was made of. No more chances. Him and his people will be executed once this is over. No questions asked.

 **Clarke:**

As we make our way through the hall I can feel the tension in Bishop as he holds me in front of him. A few of his guards around us. His hand was almost shaking as it held a scalpel to my throat. I just tried to remain calm continuing to do as he said. If I wanted to get out of this alive I had to cooperate. If I wanted to see Bellamy I had be good.

The image of Bellamy laying on the floor helpless with a knife to his throat flashed in my head. I felt the tears burning in my eyes. If I knew anything about Bellamy he was fighting right now. And he was fighting to come after me. But it was better off if he didn't right now, the men were armed and weren't willing to show any mercy. I would rather die than to see Bellamy get hurt because of me.

Bishop took me into a dark room on the bottom level of the ship. A room we hadn't had time to inspect yet. As we stood in the dark room I felt Bishop lean into my ear. "Time to have my fun with you princess," he whispered. I fought back the tears. Princess. It sounded disgusting as it rolled off his tongue. Nothing like when Bellamy said it. My heart ached.

I felt Bishop slowly move the scalpel away from me, still holding my arms behind my back. The darkness was overwhelming. Where were we? I listened around to get an idea of how far everyone was and if I could escape. The darkness felt endless. Like the darkness out in space.

Bishop's grip slowly loosened from my arms. I took advantage of his weakness swinging my leg underneath him. He fell to the floor quickly as I backed up trying to find a wall. I felt hands grip my waist as I was backing up. "Where do you think you're going?" The man's strong hands tightened around my hips pinning me against a wall. The cold walls against my skin. "We've got a lot of things to explore together."

"Damn it, Clarke. Why can't you just accept that you're stuck with me?" Bishop's voice was hoarse. A deep grunt slipped from his mouth as he got up.

The man behind me held me against the wall. He held my wrists against my back with one hand and rested his other hand on my waist. I felt disgusted. But I was outnumbered. I had no weapons. Even if I took one of them down I couldn't make it out alive.

I felt a tear slip from my eye, it slipped down my cheek and down my chest. "I'll take it from here Smith." The man slowly released my wrists only for a new set of hands to wrap around them. "Let's get out of here before they find us." Bishop leaned into my neck once again slowly whispering against it as he rested his chin on my shoulder. "We can take you somewhere nice, somewhere we can be alone."

The alarm had finally stopped echoing in the background. Bishop pulled me off the wall pushing me blindly around. I'm sure he couldn't see anything either, but he knew this ship well. He didn't need the lights to know where everything was.

I hear the crack of the radio echo in the room. Octavia's voice came over. "Monty, Raven shut everything down I'm coming to meet you in the security room. Make sure there is a total lockdown. They couldn't have gotten too far."

The radio went silent for a few seconds before Monty's voice shot back. "Already on it. Focus on getting everyone together, we'll do a complete sweep."

I threw my head back, anger boiling through my body. How could we let these goons take a radio? How could we be so stupid? We fell right into their trap.

"Smith, Williams, Jones let's get out of here before they find us. They have a lot of people and we don't nearly have enough ammunition to take them all down." Bishop's grip tightened around my wrists. I took a deep breath.

After a few minutes, there was a loud creak filling the room. Light began to fill the room. A trap door. It was an exit. But I thought we went over all the exits. The guards jumped down first making sure to grab their bags and weapons. Bishop pushed me out of the door. The guard quickly catching me and wrapping his arms around me.

Soon we were on our way sneaking away from the ship. I saw the Rover out of the corner of my eye but ignored it completely. If they didn't see it then it would be easier for everyone to catch up to us.

The moon lit up the evening sky. We had been so busy inside it had been a few days since we really had the chance to come out and embrace the outdoor beauty. Another tear slipped from my eye as I thought about how negligent we'd been to everything the past few days. Everyone had been so caught up in preparing for winter that we hadn't even considered actually enjoying ourselves.

We walked for about an hour until we got to Becca's lab. I could feel my insides twisting and turning as we walked in through the broken door. Memories flash through my head. Memories of the past 6 years I had spent with Madi here. Madi. I know she has everyone there to take care of her, but I don't know if I could live with the fact that I didn't even get to say bye. These past few days we'd barely spent any time together.

If anything happens to me the one thing I'd regret is not telling Madi that I've loved her like a daughter. Not telling her that she's meant the world to me and always will. Not telling her that I'm so grateful to have her in my life. I'm sure she knows, but I wish I could tell her myself. I would do anything to hold her in my arms right now.

I was pulled from my thoughts when Bishop pushed me down onto one of the chairs. Immediately tying my wrists down to the elbow rests and my ankles down to the legs of the chair. I blankly stared at him ignoring the large smile plastered across his face.

"You have me where you want me. So, now what?" My attitude oozing through my teeth as I stared at him. He raised an eyebrow as he put both his hands on my forearms.

"Oh, this isn't where I want you, I'll take you there later. This is just the beginning." His tone was a little too excited. I could feel my insides melting as he stared at me. Running his fingers along my arms.

I kept my face detached. Closing my eyes, I just imagined everyone I loved around me. Madi, Bellamy, my mom, Octavia, Monty, Raven, even Murphy, Emori, Echo, Harper, Miller, Kane, Indra, Jackson. They were my family. I imagined us all sitting around a table laughing together, eating dinner, talking strategies, enjoying one another's presence. I wish I hadn't taken all those times for granted. If I get out of here I'm going to enjoy everything. I'm going to make the most of my time with them.

"Open your eyes and look at me!" Bishop's breath blowing all over my face. I could feel the heat of his face close to mine. I opened my eyes to meet his. His icy blue eyes staring directly at me. Filled with anger. Hatred. A smile crossed his face, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Much better. Now shall we?"

I ignored him as he pulled out his knife. Placing the knife against my clavicle he dug the knife into my skin. He made another cut alongside it. I narrowed my eyes on him as he cut me keeping my face expressionless. He tugged on my shirt ripping it down the middle. "Perfect, we're back to where I had left off." His fingers ran along some of the scars across my chest and the scars that ran across my stomach. "You've got a lot of scars." He leaned down kissing my collarbone. I cringed at the touch of his lips, inhaling deeply. "But this one is my favorite because it's mine."

His face moved back up, his lips covered in black blood. "You're sick." I could feel the shaking in my voice as I yelled at him.

He ran his thumb across his lips examining it. "You really are special, Clarke." He placed his hand on my collarbone. My breathing hitched as he touched me. I just needed to get away. I can't put up with this any longer. I just wish that I could close my eyes and Bellamy would appear through that door. But surely that was just a fantasy. "Well, I know you lived here before so how about you tell us where we can get some food? Since we've been your prisoners we haven't had much to eat." He let out a small laugh. "Terrible service, you need to work on that."

"Why should I tell you?" I looked up at him through my lashes. His eyes narrowed down at me. The smirk slowly fading as he stared.

He turned around throwing his hands in the air. "Because it's only a matter of time before they find our trap door. And I know Bellamy will be the first one running this way to find you. So, when he comes this way I'll gut him like a pig. But this can be avoided if you give me what I want."

I felt like my heart just got ripped out of my chest. I tried to catch my breath as I closed my eyes. Get a grip Clarke, Bellamy would never come alone. He would never be so stupid. Octavia would never let him. Kane would never let him. Neither would my mom or Raven or Monty or even Murphy. But I had to be a good girl if I wanted to get through this. Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes looking back up at him through my lashes. "The food is in the supply closet at the end of the lab."

He leaned forward pulling my head back by my hair. Leaning his face close to mine. "Good call, wouldn't want to have to eat Bellamy for dinner. Right?" A large grin on his face as he stared at me. His knife tapping against my neck as he held me into place. "You're lucky you're cute."

He pulled away walking away. The other guards sitting around me carefully observing me. I threw my head back and closed my eyes as I sat there. My body slowly going numb as I thought of all the things that might happen. I fought back the tears as I sat there. If I die here will I be happy with how I lived my life? All the people I killed maybe this is what I deserve. Maybe this is exactly where I'm supposed to be. Suffering the way everyone else suffered before I killed them. This was karma for everything I had done. For being selfish. For wasting my life trying to survive without actually living. I deserved this.


	20. Chapter 20

**Prepare for the Worst**

 **Bellamy:**

We swept the ship and found a trap door leading outside. I knew it. These people lived on this ship for 100 years, they knew every inch of it. I tried to tell Octavia that, but she didn't listen. Now we've wasted a few hours looking inside the ship when they could be anywhere.

I felt a warm hand rest on my shoulder, giving me a soft squeeze. "I'm sorry Bell. But I already said I'm sending out a search party with weapons at first light."

I felt my blood boiling. I turned to face her pulling away from her hand. "That's hours away. Who knows how far they'll get by then? You may not care, but I owe my life to Clarke. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for her." My voice echoed throughout the room, everyone going silent and looking at me. The atmosphere in the meeting chamber was tense. Everyone was on their toes.

"Hey, we all owe our lives to her. But we can't go out there like this. We need a game plan. It won't help her if we walk around aimlessly." Raven's voice was soft and soothing. She looked at me with sad eyes. I sat down in one of the chairs resting my elbows on the table and burying my face in my hands. "We all want her back Bellamy. We won't rest until we get a plan together to get her back."

I looked around the room and everyone stared at me. Their eyes filled with sympathy. Carefully making eye contact. They were treating me like I was made of glass. Like I would break and run after her by myself.

Kane stood up from his seat placing his hands on the table. "Where could he have taken her? There's not much green land out here so unless he's completely stupid he has to be within it right? They would need food, water so maybe they went to the river?" Abby rested her hand on his forearm instantly causing him to calm down. Everyone was tense. But they were right we had to have a plan.

"They don't know how to hunt. They would need Clarke to do it and if she were untied she would get away." Raven stood up, pacing back and forth. Dragging her leg back and forth. "How far is Becca's lab from here? She has everything there. They already knew where that was right?" She stopped pacing, crossing her arms in front of her. A large smile across her face.

"We'll send groups out in every direction. Bellamy can lead a search party towards the bunker with Kane. Azuma and I will head towards Polis. Indra and Echo will head in the other direction towards the sea." Octavia stood in the corner of the room looking around the room, waiting for someone to respond. "Each search party will have one hundred people. That should be more than enough people to find them."

"Okay, but what about the rest of us? We just sit here and do nothing?" Raven sat down her arms folding across her chest. She scowled at Octavia.

"No. You will guard the ship we don't need any further issues. Bishop took Clarke and 3 others. From our records, they are all guards from the prisoner ship. Smith, Williams, and Jones." Octavia began pacing around the room. Her face was neutral, not a single emotion on her face. In front of the people I understood why she needed to be so cold, but not in front of the rest of us. We're family. "Now everyone, go and get some sleep and we'll be ready to go in a few hours."

Everyone slowly made their way out of the room. Everyone was nervous. Anything could happen tomorrow and there was no way of really knowing.

Octavia stepped forward wrapping her hand around my forearm. "Bell. I'm sorry."

I grabbed her arm pulling her into my chest. I felt so guilty. This wasn't her fault. "This isn't your fault O. It's mine. I can't protect anyone. I couldn't protect you. My responsibility and I failed." I felt the tears burning in my eyes as I buried my face into her shoulder.

She pulled away grabbing both of my shoulders. "Stop. You didn't fail anyone. You've always done what you could to protect me. But now I don't need protecting. I'm a fighter." She moved one hand to cup my cheek as she stood there looking up at me. "Clarke will be okay. She's a fighter too. I promise you, I will fight for her."

I felt a tear fall down my face, but I quickly wiped it away. "I'm sorry."

She dropped her hand back to my shoulder giving me a light shake. "Stop. We're okay. You're okay. Nothing will happen. Now go to your room and sleep. I'll send Madi to your room to watch over you."

She gave me a wink before hugging me once more. I let out a light chuckle. I pulled away moving past Octavia. Azuma gave me a light pat on my shoulder as I moved past him.

I made it to my room. Quietly walking in deep in thought. I whipped off my shirt and laid down on the bed. Not bothering to get under the covers. I stared up into the darkness. All I could think about was where Clarke was. What that bastard could be doing to her. The pain she may be feeling.

The door cracked open immediately the lights switched on blinding me. I forgot Madi was joining me. I quickly covered my chest with a pillow beside me. Madi cracked a sad smile as she walked in. Her head hanging low. I sat up and grabbed her arm, pulling her back towards me. "What's wrong?"

She leaned against my legs and the bed for support as she sat beside me. A tear slipped from her eye. "I know they took Clarke." I felt my heart clench as I looked down at her. Her eyes dark as they shifted to meet mine. "No one told me. I thought we were family. Families tell each other everything. Right?"

I pulled her into my lap, burying her face into my chest. Her tears ran down me. I let her cry for a bit. A few tears slipping down my cheeks. I kissed the top of her head lightly as she sobbed into my chest. "You are family. You always will be. But sometimes we don't tell you things because we're not allowed to. We are your family, but we are also the leaders of Wonkru. One day you will be too."

She pulled away looking up at me. Her eyes were blood shot and swollen. Her nose was running. "You'll let me lead with you guys?" Her face slightly lit up at the thought.

I wiped away some of her tears letting out a slight laugh. "Of course." A smile crossed her face. She took a deep breath, getting herself together. "Tomorrow you're going to have to stay here with Raven and Monty. We can't take you out there because you're a target."

She gave me a nod. Her eyes filled with disappointment. Her smile quickly fading. "Goodnight Bellamy."

She stood up moving around the bed to the other side. I got underneath the covers laying my arm underneath her head. "Goodnight Natblida."

After a few minutes, I could hear that Madi was fast asleep. Her light snores filling the air. I tossed and turned all night, but I couldn't sleep knowing Clarke was out there being tortured. I swear if I get my hands-on Bishop he won't live to see another day. If anything happens to Clarke I don't know what I'll do. I barely just got her back. It's not fair.

 **Octavia:**

I laid in bed beside Azuma. But I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned for hours. Our plan running through my head. Maybe I should be with Bellamy, maybe he'll need me. I thought of everything that could go wrong and how I could prevent it. But nothing was changing the fact that they could be anywhere, they could have found weapons, Clarke could be dead. I could be endangering the lives of my people to get back someone who may not even be alive.

I felt Azuma's arm tighten around my waist, his face burying into my neck. "Stop worrying. You need sleep."

I rested my hand on his head as we laid there. "Is it okay if you lead the group without me? I think I should be with Bellamy tomorrow."

He let out a sigh. Sending shivers down my body. "If that's what you want that's what we'll do. Now sleep we have to be up soon."

He pulled me closer to his chest. I turned to face him running my fingers along his cheeks. He kept his eyes clothes, but I knew he was awake. I slowly started rubbing his head. Azuma has been on guard duty almost nonstop for the past few days. He needed the rest. "I love you," I whispered in his ear.

He tightened his grip around my waist and pulled me over. Hovering on top of me. He gently placed kisses down the side of my face. Down my neck. Stopping at my collarbone. "I love you too. Please stop stressing things you cannot control right now. Tomorrow we _will_ find her and we _will_ get her back. And you will once again prove why you're a great commander." He cupped my face in his hands brushing his lips against mine. "Now sleep commander or I'm going to have to put you to sleep." A light smirk on his face. He began to lay kisses on my neck, using his fingers to tickle all my soft spots.

Azuma always knew how to bring me back to reality. He put me in my place when I needed it the most. He kept me grounded. I pulled him back down resting my head on his chest. He played with my hair softly until I fell asleep.

\- A few hours later -

I jolted up from a nightmare. My body was covered in sweat, my chest felt heavy, and I was out of breath. Azuma made his way to the edge of the bed sitting beside me. "It's okay. You're okay." He gently stroked my face, wiping away my sweat. "Did you have another nightmare?"

Once I caught my breath I rested my hand on his. "It doesn't matter. It's time to go." He pulled my hand to his mouth gently lacing it in soft kisses. I placed a soft kiss on his lips before jumping up to get ready.

I put my clothes on quickly throwing my hair out of the way. Azuma grabbed my hand pulling me back. "Let me do your hair, it'll only get in the way." I silently nodded. I sat on the floor in front of the bed between his legs. He slowly began pulled the tangles out of my hair with his fingers. He braided back the strands of hair that usually fell into my face when I was fighting.

I rested my head on my knees as I sat on the floor waiting for him to finish. His fingers quickly weaved in and out of my hair creating small, tight braids along the front of my face. Once he finished he placed a kiss on the top of my head. "Thank you." I stood up running my hand down his arm. "Good luck today. May we meet again."

He pulled me into a tight embrace. "We will."

I quickly made my way out of the room only to find Bellamy sitting outside my door with his face buried in his hands. I kneeled in front of him. He slowly pulled his face out of his hands. His eyes were lightly swollen from a lack of sleep. "Bell. It's time." I stood up holding out my hand to help him up. He took it groaning as he got up. "I'm going to be with you Kane. Azuma will lead the group by himself." A sad smile crossed his face. "We fight better together." I winked trying to make him feel better.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "I'm still the better Blake." I rolled my eyes ignoring his joke as we walked down the hallway.

We walked outside to find everyone already armed and ready to go. I stood at the edge of the ship door waiting for everyone to quiet down. Bellamy stood amongst everyone else. "Keep your eyes sharp and your weapons ready. We don't want any issues. If you see something out of the ordinary report to your search party leader and radio everyone else immediately." Everyone nodded in silence. "If you find them, do not kill anyone. Bring them back alive. We will punish them once we're back. We will make them suffer." The crowd began to cheer. I threw my fist in the air as I yelled, "Wonkru!" Everyone followed suit chanting Wonkru as they headed in their separate directions.

Slowly the chanting ended and everyone's eyes were focused on scanning their surroundings. We spread out across the tree line. Bellamy and I marched in front, Kane stayed back to make sure nothing went wrong. The lab was only a few hours walk from the ship, but it felt like so much longer. The intensity that filled the air. Everyone remained quiet as we trudged through the forest.

Bellamy was extremely tense. He walked with his head slightly thrown back, his jaw tense, and his hands tightly gripped around his gun. His eyes randomly darting around looking for signs of them, but there wasn't anything. Any tracks that may have been left behind were long gone thanks to the light rain that poured down. I hate to see Bellamy like this, but I know what it feels like to have the person you love taken from you with no idea of what's happening to them.

I pushed my thoughts away, silently continuing through the forest. I felt a hand on my shoulder I quickly turned around, ready to attack when I noticed it was Kane. I shook my head slowly relaxing my body. "Sorry, I just wanted to talk to you."

"About what?" His brows furrowed. He stared at me, his eyes full of pain as he stared at me. Slowly everyone began to pass us continuing on.

Kane and I turned to continue walking. He looked around cautiously before talking. "I want you to make sure that if we find Bishop that we don't leave Bellamy alone with him. Especially if you want to keep him alive until we get home so we can use him as a demonstration."

I looked over at him through the corner of my eyes. "The kill is his. Whether that happens now or later well that depends on the circumstances."

He nodded at me. Stopping his tracks falling back into his position. I ran forward catching up to the front. We were close. I could almost smell the ocean getting closer. As we got closer I stopped everyone. They all gathered up in front of me. I stood in front of everyone with Kane and Bellamy at my side. "We're almost there. Once we get there all of you will surround the area to make sure no one gets away. The few we asked to go in with us, you know the formation. Scan the area while you're there and don't let your guard down."

Everyone nodded in agreement and I could feel my stomach tossing and turn. The last time I felt like this was at the conclave. This has to be it. This has to be where Clarke is. She needs to be alive. Or Bellamy will break. I've been through it and I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone, but especially not Bellamy. This _will_ work.


	21. Chapter 21

**Revenge**

 **Clarke:**

Bishop made his way across the room with a plate of food. He sat on the table in front of me. "Eat up beautiful. You'll need the strength." He held up the plate in front of me.

I tugged against the ropes holding down my arms. "Can't really feed myself like this. Unless you're going to untie me." His eyes narrowed on me as he thought about whether or not he should give me so much freedom.

He shifted on the table looking at my wrists. "I'll untie you if you promise to be a good girl. Maybe we can be civil. But remember, if you make any smart moves I'll kill the people who mean most to you. Starting with Bellamy."

I felt chills go down my spine. It was time to stop being selfish. Everyone will be better off if I just suffer through this. At least I'll know everyone is safer without me there. Bishop stared at me, his eyes scanning my face. "Okay. I'll be good."

He raised one eyebrow a slight smile crossing his face. He set the plate to the side pulling out a knife to cut through the rope. I rolled my wrists as soon as he freed them. Picking up the plate he set it into my lap. "Eat. I've got a few things to prepare for our evening." His smile widened as he stared down at me. I looked back down at the food that was placed in front of me.

I began eating alone in the lab. I was alone, but I felt like all eyes were on me. There's a fully loaded gun across the room. It's taped to the bottom of the control panel. I kept it there in the case of an emergency. I could get to it, but it would be risky. And if I can't take them all out then I'll be risking everyone else's lives. Between the four of them, they had one shotgun. Assuming it's full they'd have around 6 rounds. I can handle a few shots, but I'd have to take them down. I'm sure I'm a better shot than they are.

My train of thought was broken when one of Bishop's men came and sat in front of me. He leaned in closely, his eyes focused on mine. "Do you have a plan to get out yet?" he whispered. His eyes scanning the room to make sure no one was listening. I stared at him with confusion. What did he want? "Look I know if anyone can get out of here, it's you. I spent a lot of time watching your friends and listening to them talk about you. Telling stories of what you've done and how you would've escaped from our ship. I want you to help me."

His eyes went soft as he stared at me. "Why should I help you?" I could hear the anger in my voice even as I whispered. But he should know I have every right to be angry.

He looked around the room once again. "My family is gone because of Bishop. I want him dead. I know you do too. If I help you get out will you help me?"

Mimicking his motion, I scanned the room. Continuing to eat. I sat and analyzed his expression. He looked genuine, but could I really trust him? What if this was a test? What if they just want to know what I'm thinking so that they can stay prepared. After all, Lexa did that to Kane and Jaha when she held them as prisoners.

"I know you probably don't trust me, but I can prove it." He unzipped a hidden pocket on the inside of his coat, pulling out an old beat up picture. It was of him, a woman, and a young girl. The girl was a spitting image of him. The same blue eyes, button nose, high cheek bones, and chiseled jaw.

I ran my fingers along the printed photo taking in their surroundings. They were on the ship standing in front of a window together. Stars filling the background. "May I ask what happened to them?"

His eyes began to tear up, but he blinked them away. Immediately clearing his throat. "So, I'm sure you know that living on a ship we had very limited resources and very strict rules. Bishop was ruthless, in order to save his own ass, he got decided who was disposable and who wasn't. We were running out of resources so he decided that there was only one solution. To control the population. Anyone with any disabilities or diseases were floated. He didn't tell anyone until after it was done. We did as we were told, took the prisoners to a certain cell block and he released them. Only after did I find out my wife and daughter were in there. My daughter was autistic and my wife had a heart murmur." The tears formed in his eyes once again. They were pushing against his lids, but he didn't allow them to fall. I rested my hand on his knee, giving him a reassuring smile. "He didn't realize it was my wife and daughter until after and he still thinks I'm okay with it. But I'm not and he will suffer for his actions."

His hands balled up into fists. I pulled his fist into my hand, instantly causing him to release. A tear fell from his eye falling into his lap. "I will help you if you help me. I have a plan, but you're going to have to do me a favor." He nodded pulling his hand out of mine. "Okay. First I need you to get everyone together upstairs and away from here so I can get my plan together. I only need about five minutes. Then, I just need you to get a hold of your gun. When you get it, I want you to come to me and yell at me. 'We lost all of our people because of you.' Then slap me. I'll know you have it." His eyes widened as he stared at me. Shock filling his face. He began to shake his head, but I gave his knee a slight squeeze as I sat in front of him. "Once you do that everyone will come rushing in, pulling you away from me. That's when I'll make my move."

"But what are you going to do?" His face filled with confusion.

I sat back popping the last piece of meat into my mouth. "Just let me worry about that. When I make my move, you'll know. And I need you to pretend your gun is jammed." He nodded slowly getting up and walking back up the stairs.

I've been stabbed in the back plenty of times while trying to become allies with my enemies, but all I've got now is hope. Hope that this will work. Hope that he's not going to break my trust. Hope that I can pull this off before Bellamy gets here. Hope that no one I love gets hurt in the process. I took a deep breath before setting the plate on the table in front of me. I rested my head back, closing my eyes. My mind ran through the plan a million times running through any errors that could possibly occur. This needed to be perfect.

 **Abby:**

Everyone was gone except for Raven, Monty, Jackson, Madi, and I. All I could think of was what condition Clarke would be in right now. I know she's strong, she's come a long way since we were in space. She's a fighter. She's been through the worst of the worst, but that doesn't mean that I'm not scared for her. She's been through too much to lose it all now.

I was taken from my thoughts as Madi wrapped me up in a warm hug. Her face burying into my shoulder. I tightened my hold of her. I hadn't known Madi long, but she reminded me a lot of Clarke. Maybe not of Clarke as a child, but definitely the Clarke I know now. She's strong, independent, caring. She's fit to follow Clarke's footsteps.

I rested my hand on her wool beanie, softly rubbing my fingers into her head in an effort to calm her down. "It's okay, Madi. She'll be fine. We'll be fine."

Her breathing began to calm down as I held her. She was so young but had already been through so much. She lost her family, thought she was the only person left on Earth. She found Clarke and finally had someone to love her and care for her again. Someone to teach her right from wrong. Although, neither of them had said it she had clearly come to be Clarke's daughter.

"I can't lose her." I felt her warm tears seep through my shirt as she softly cried.

I pulled away from Madi, holding her an arm's length away to look at her. I wiped away the tears that made their way down her cheeks. "You won't lose her. I know she's like a mother to you and I promise she's probably fighting her way to come back to you."

"She's not just a mother to me. She's been my mother, my father, a sibling, a friend. She's been everything I've ever needed. You don't understand. I've lost all my family to Praimfaya, but once I met Clarke it didn't matter because it was like I had it all back." A few more tears slipped down her cheeks. She squeezed her eyes shut in an effort to stop them, but she couldn't.

I continued to wipe them away. Her eyes finally opened as I pulled my hand away. "I know. You've been her family too. She loves you, and she will fight for you. It's who Clarke is. But I want you to know that we all love you and will continue to love you." I pulled her back in squeezing her tightly against me. This little girl is damaged. She's lost so much. But I'm glad my daughter was able to be there for her. I knew she would be. She was always one to take care of others before herself. Madi seems to be the same way though. It's nice knowing they took care of one another.

My radio crackled from my waistband. "Abby, we have a situation I need you to come to the security room immediately," Raven was nearly yelling over the radio.

Madi immediately pulled away. Instantly grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the security room. A spitting image of Clarke. We quickly made our way down the hall bursting through the door to find Raven loading her gun.

"The rest of prisoners have been released, it's time to end this. I radioed Jackson to shut down the medical bay. I radioed some of the guards to arm our people. We need to get rid of these prisoners now." Her face tensed as she looked between Madi and me.

"What do you mean we need to get rid of these prisoners?" I knew what she meant, but could we actually kill the rest of their people? What would that make us?

"Abby. It's kill or be killed." Raven picked up the radio clipping it to her waistband.

Madi moved forward picking up a gun that laid on the table. "Clarke would want this. She told me if the demons ever came back we'd kill them all."

Before I could even respond the radio's crack echoed throughout the room. "Raven. We need to attack. Now. They're trying to get to the armory."

I picked up the spare gun from the table. And headed out of the door. The armory was a floor below us. We needed to get there before any of them did. Or we would be defenseless. I could hear chaos filling the hallway, but Madi kept pulling me. Keeping my attention on the task at hand.

Once we made it to the armory I pushed Madi inside. "If anyone bursts through this door I want you to shoot. Okay? I'll knock before I come in so you know it's me." She nodded as I shut the door behind me.

Raven gave me a slight nod as we stood in front of the door. Kill or be killed. And we've fought too long and too hard to be killed like this. There was an echo of chaos coming from both ends of the hallway. I could feel the floor shaking as we stood against the door.

I turned to Raven. "Back to back. I'll handle the left, you handle the right." She nodded in agreement. "If we don't make it…"

"We will." She looked confident. But I wasn't so sure. There was two of us and God knows how many of them. As the footsteps came closer I could feel my hands shaking. My end filled first, people making their way down the hall. There was too many of them I shot as many rounds as I could.

I could hear the other side of the hallway begin to fill up, but shots fired from behind me. I turned to see our people making their way down the halls. Lead by Jackson and Monty. I couldn't hide my relief as they took down the prisoners. All shots to the legs to disable them. The few remaining immediately popped their hands up falling to their knees in defeat.

I turned to the door gently knocking on it. "Madi, it's me." There was no response so I knocked a little harder. "Madi. It's me. Abby." Silence. I pressed my ear to the door. But I didn't hear anything. I pushed through the door to find Madi standing with blood splattered across her face. Her breathing was heavy. The limp body of a woman laid in front of her. The hatch to the vent was broken through.

I quickly pulled her into a hug. Rubbing her shoulders as I held her. "It's okay, Madi. It's okay." She dropped her gun on the floor immediately wrapping her arms around me. I continued to rub her as she began to relax in my arms. "You did what I told you to. I'm so proud of you. Clarke would be too."

"She's the first person I've ever killed. But…" She let out a deep breath slowly pulling away from me. "But I had to do it. I had to do it for my people."

I cupped her cheek in my hand. "Yes, you did. You did good Madi." I pulled her back into a hug.

After a few minutes she pulled away, her eyes moved up to meet mine. "Thank you. Clarke always told me that you were a good mother, but today you were an even better grandmother." I could feel the tears slip down my cheeks. I never imagined what this would feel like. She may not be my blood granddaughter, but she was surely nothing short of it.

I leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "And I will always be here for you Madi." I tried to hold back the tears, but it became almost uncontrollable.

The crack of the radio broke out pulling us away from our moment. There was heavy breathing and incoherent mumbling across the radio. "We've made it to the bunker and we just heard yelling followed by a gunshot. Bellamy and Octavia just ran inside and I need anyone around to come for backup. We need all units here as soon as possible. I repeat. All units make it to the bunker as soon as possible." I felt the blood leave my face as I stared at Madi's shocked face.

I can't lose her. We can't lose her.


	22. Chapter 22

**Patience**

 **Clarke:**

I could feel my skin itching to make a run for it and attack now, but I needed to be patient. If I wanted this to work it was best to wait it out. Jones is supposed to take everyone upstairs into the end office. But I can feel myself growing more and more impatient.

"I finally opened that room at the end of the hall I think we should do a sweep for anything good." My eyes focused on Jones. He confidently stood in front of Bishop and the rest of his men.

"You all do a sweep, I'll watch her." Bishop peeked over his shoulder, but I diverted my eyes to the floor.

"Sir, I'll watch her. You need to decide what is useful and what's not." He remained emotionless, giving nothing away.

"Fine. Smith give him the gun." Bishop motioned towards Jones. "If she tries anything shoot both of her legs. But don't kill her." He looked back at me with a tight smirk on his face. "Let me have the pleasure of making her suffer." I rolled my eyes as he walked towards me. He cupped a cheek in the palm on his hand. Running the pad of his thumb across my cheek, slowly making his way to my lips. "Be a good girl and maybe I can give you what you want."

My blood was boiling. All I could think about was making this man suffer, but I took in a deep breath trying to relax as he released my face. Bellamy. Madi. My mom. Octavia. I need to do this for them. I need to fight for them. They need me. My people need me.

I watched as everyone made their way up the stairs, Bishop giving me one last glance as he made his way down the hallway. Jones motioned for me to stay a few minutes as he stood at the end of the staircase waiting for them to get into the room. As they closed the door behind them I quickly jumped up pulling out the gun from underneath the panel along with the ammunition. I locked a loaded my gun.

This is it. It's time. I could hear footsteps make their way down the hall. Jones charged at me slapping me across the face. "You're the reason all of our people are gone." He slapped me again, throwing me to the ground. I could taste the blood in my mouth. "You will suffer."

I could hear the footsteps coming out faster. I kicked Jones in the face as he stood above me. "Stand down Jones." Bishop ran down the stairs. I kicked the gun away from Jones quickly picking it up. I pointed the gun at Bishop who froze at the end of the staircase with his hands up. "Clarke, you don't want to do this. I know you're a good person."

I let out a slight laugh at the thought. "That's where you're wrong. I'm the commander of death. Wanheda. This is exactly what I want."

As I tightened my grip around the trigger I heard Jones yell. "Clarke, watch out." One of Bishop's guards shot towards me, missing me by an inch and hitting Jones instead. I backed up against the wall. I stood out of sight. Bishop ran at me, but I quickly shot out both of his legs disabling him from getting to me.

The other guards made their way down the stairs shooting aimlessly at me as I tried to pull Jones out of sight. He helped me and he deserved to live. I heard more footsteps making their way into the lab, but I didn't have time to stop. I dragged Jones down the hall.

Suddenly I felt a shot to my thigh. Instantly disabling me. The blood poured down my leg as I laid beside Jones. I could hear yelling and more gunshots, but none aimed at either of us. "We need to keep moving. Come on." I crawled across the floor towards the infirmary. Jones slowly following behind me. His screams filling the hallway. I could feel myself growing lightheaded, but I kept going. The pain from my leg was outweighed by my motivation to help Jones. He was in more pain than I was.

Once I made it to the door I punched in the code, the door opening in front of me. I fell through the door trying to drag myself further in so Jones could make it through. Once we got inside I heard the footsteps come closer, but I immediately locked the door. We were safest in here. No one knew the code except for Madi and me.

I immediately begin to check the wound on his leg. He was heavily bleeding. He could have nicked a major artery. By the looks of how pale he's going and his increasing temperature he was going to go fast. I dug through the cabinets for some disinfectant, sutures, clamps, and lap pads. I quickly began to dig through his leg for the bullet. The blood pouring out was making it difficult to find it. There was a large part of his femoral artery that was nicked, even if I had the supplies he would barely make it.

I could feel the tears flow down my face as I sat there staring at his leg. He helped me, I can't just let him die like this. I can't just sit here and do nothing. I continued to dig through his leg trying to find the bullet. After a few minutes, I found it lodged deep into his femur. A femur fracture would be a difficult recovery. Not impossible, but very difficult especially under our certain circumstances.

"It's okay, Clarke," he choked staring down at my distraught face. "Fix yourself. Let me be with my family." A tear fell down his face. He grabbed my hand from my leg giving it a nice squeeze. His hand was pale and very cold.

"No. I can't just let you die after everything you've done for me. I…" I felt the lump in my throat grow bigger as I stared at him. Completely hopeless.

He squeezed my hand once again. "I need to be with my family. You need to be with yours. Please, just let me go."

I moved up to his face laying my leg underneath his head. I began to run my fingers through his hair. "May we meet again." His eyes began to close as he laid in my lap. I watched his chest slowly stop rising and falling. I had never felt so useless.

I need to kill Bishop. I need to make sure that I fulfill his promise. I checked his pulse once more before moving away to handle my own wound. I still feel weak and lightheaded, but nothing is going to stop me now.

I dug through my leg pulling out the bullet, disinfecting my wound, and cauterizing my wound. It was painful, but it would heal quicker and take less time. As I laid on the floor trying to gather the strength to get up and prepare myself to go out I heard the door to the infirmary unlock.

"I told you it was your birthday," Octavia yelled. All I saw was Octavia and Bellamy rush into the room before my vision went dark and I fell unconscious.

 **Bellamy:**

I was lost in my thoughts that I hadn't noticed that we had already made it to the lab. It wasn't far, but at the rate, I was leading us through the forest we got here much faster than usual. If we wanted to get Clarke back alive we couldn't waste time.

Before we got too close Octavia gathered everyone around once to review our plan. All I wanted to do was burst through that door and start shooting, but I knew that Clarke wouldn't have it. Surround the area, weapons hot, analyze the situation, attack.

I made my way towards the front door when I heard voices and gunshots. Without any thought I ran in, Octavia following quickly behind me. Panic spread among the rest of our search party. I couldn't hear anything over the blood rushing through my body and my heart beating through my chest. I saw a body being dragged downstairs out of sight and chaos around the room. I rushed down the stairs blindly following one of the armed guards. I saw Octavia taking down the other two guards upstairs as I ran. The man fired and I instantly followed suit blindly firing at him from behind.

I didn't see Clarke anywhere, but if he was shooting at something it had to be her. First shot was a miss, but it definitely got his attention. Before he could wrap his finger around his trigger again I aimed a kill shot at his chest. Taking him down almost instantly. Before I could see anything else I saw someone crawling into a room at the end of hall the door locking behind him almost instantly. I ran to the door slamming my fist against the door. But that was ineffective.

Lines of blood were smeared across the floor. I ran back down the hallway to see Octavia standing above Bishop. His screams of agony filling the room. I ran at him hitting his face with the butt of my gun. "Where is she?"

His breathing became heavy as he laid on the floor. He grabbed my ankle in pure agony and desperation. "Please, help me." His face fell on my boot as he laid beneath me.

I kicked his face off my feet, moving his chin up to face me. "Tell me where she is." My voice was filled with anger. Octavia looked over at me, concern spread across her face. "If you don't tell me where she is we won't help you."

With the little energy, he had left he pointed at the lines of blood. It was her. I knew it. I could feel my heart slightly lighten, but immediately falling once again as I took in the blood smeared across the floor. Once I turned to make my way down the hall I felt Bishop grab at my ankle again. I kicked him away and rushed down the hallway.

"Is there any way we can use an intercom to talk to? She'll open the door if she knows it's us." Octavia's voice was hopeful. I looked around the small panel on the outside of the door, but nothing. No intercom. Just a keypad and a small screen. I shook my head at her, her face immediately falling. "It's 6 digits long. Try any dates that may be significant to Clarke."

I punched in her birthday. Wrong. Her mom's birthday. Wrong. Her dad's birthday. Wrong. The date we landed on Earth. Wrong. "These are all wrong. I don't know what else it could be. It's not her birthday, or her mom's or her dad's. I don't know when Madi's is or when she met her. It's not the day we all came down the Earth." I punched the door with full rage. For all we know Clarke is in there being tortured by the man that crawled in there behind her.

"Bellamy. Try your birthday." Her eyes widened as she stared at me.

"Why would it be my birthday? I don't even think she knows…" I was cut off as Octavia pushed me away. Quickly punching in the numbers for my birthday.

There was a slight silence before the lock clicked open. A green light appearing on the door handle. Octavia burst through the door, I followed quickly behind her. "I told you it was your birthday."

I took in the surroundings. There was blood pooled around the room. Clarke's eyes flickered very lightly as she laid on the floor, but as soon as she made eye contact with me her body went limp. She was shot.

"Bellamy. Look." Octavia pointed to the blood seeping through her wrapped leg. "We need to fix her wound before we take her back."

"How? Abby isn't here and…" My voice began to fade as I stared down at Clarke. Her face was pale. There was blood dried up at the corner of her mouth and on her chest. She had bruises all over her body.

"I'm going to get Kane, Abby can talk us through it." I gave her a nod before she ran out of the room.

I pulled Clarke into my lap, resting her head on my chest. The tears burned in my eyes, but I pushed them away. Clarke wouldn't be crying right now, she'd be working to fix me. But I wasn't Clarke. I could never be Clarke. She was fearless. Strong. I'm not.

A few minutes passed before I felt a warm hand wrap around my shoulder. I closed my eyes holding Clarke closer to my chest. Abby's voice filled the room. "Okay now tell me what you see."

Octavia unwrapped Clarke's dressings. "She cauterized her wound, but I don't think she did it completely because there's still a lot of blood pouring out. It's pouring out quickly."

"Your best bet is to cauterize it again. It'll hold her in until you get her back here. Now go heat up something and prepare her. Put something in her mouth for her to bite down on because she's unconscious now but she won't be for long. This is going to hurt." Octavia jumped up preparing everything as Abby reviewed the details. I took some cloth and placed it in her mouth.

Octavia made her way back with a heated scrap of metal. She looked up to me for confirmation before pressing the metal against her leg. A few seconds later Clarke woke up, her muffled screams filling the room. She immediately reached out for my hand, I wrapped my hand around hers. She began squeezing it tightly as she tried to release some of the pain she was feeling.

"You did good. Get back home safely." Clarke through her head back, her forehead covered in sweat and her breathing heavy. Her eyes were weak as she stared at me.

"We tied up Bishop. We can get something to carry Clarke on and we can head back." Kane stood up looking around the room.

"No. I'll carry her." I cradled her in my arms picking her up off the floor. She let out a slight groan, but let out a sigh as she leaned her head against my chest,

"Bellamy, you can't possibly carry her all the way back to camp by yourself." I stared back down at Clarke. Her eyes slowly closing as she laid in my arms.

"I'll be fine." I gave him a slight smile. He turned around in defeat. There was no arguing about this. I am not letting Clarke out of my sight. Even if I have to carry her for hours through the dark.

"No, he's right Bell. We can make a gurney out of some of the remaining things here and we can both carry her home." She quickly turned on her heels rummaging through the cabinets for goods. I placed a soft kiss on the top of Clarke's head watching her stir in my arms. When I looked back up Octavia held up a small bed sheet and a plastic board.

She folded the sheets and tied it down the board. Creating a makeshift gurney. I gently set Clarke down on it. Wrapping her up with more bed sheets to make her a little more comfortable. Once she was set Octavia and I picked her up. "Time to go home."


	23. Chapter 23

**Paralyzed**

 **Bellamy:**

We carried Clarke through the forest. Octavia silently leading the way, occasionally looking over her shoulder to check if everything was okay. Her face slightly lower than usual. The pain clear in her eyes. After a few hours of walking Azuma and his search party caught up with us. He tried to take over for Octavia, but she didn't let him.

The clouds were dark and heavy above us as we came closer to camp. A storm was coming soon. But we didn't have much prepared yet for anyone who wanted to live outside. We had food, but assuming the storm passed after a few days it would take time before we could set up any type of cabins. All the wait to get out, only to be stuck back inside.

"Octavia," I called out behind her. She stopped slowly turning to meet my gaze. "None of this is your fault." Her eyes widened as she stared at me, as if I had read her mind. "It's not easy running things. But you can't blame yourself for all the loses."

Her smile was weak, but a slight hope filled her eyes as she silently turned around continuing through the forest. A little more jump in her step as she marched, her head held a little higher. When I was in charge I always had Clarke, and although Octavia has Azuma I want her to know that she will always have me too. She may not be responsibility anymore, but she will always be my sister.

Walking back felt endless. My muscles ached, my head was throbbing, and I couldn't shake the thought of all the terrible things they must have done to her. Who's kill would it be? As much as I want it to be mine it could be anyone's. Clarke's or even Octavia's we all wanted him dead by our own hand. I wonder what happened with the rest of the prisoners. I heard Kane talking to Abby on the radio earlier, but I was too distracted to pick up anything important.

"Where are we?" Clarke's eyes fluttered open as she mumbled through the pain. The sight of her bright blue eyes made my chest well up.

"We're almost home just about a quarter of a mile. Go back to sleep." I smiled down at her. Her face was tense.

Octavia looked over her shoulder a slight smile on her face. "I'm glad you're still alive."

"Where's Bishop? I have to kill him. He…" She began breathing hard, quickly trying to shift to sit up. Azuma rested his hand on her shoulder slowly pushing her back down.

"He's here. Don't worry we'll make sure we kill him." She looked around in search of him, but eventually she gave up. "What happened out there Clarke?"

She rested her head back down, tightening the sheets around her as we carried her. "One of Bishop's men helped me. The man that was laying on the floor beside me. Jones. He helped me in exchange I promised to kill Bishop." She stopped for a second blinking away any tears that glistened in her eyes. "Bishop killed his wife and daughter. He spent the last few years plotting his revenge. He died trying to help me Bellamy. I need to kill Bishop for him. That kill is mine."

Octavia stopped, turning around to face Clarke. "You two can make the kill together. I know Bishop has made you both suffer." Clarke nodded lightly. "Now get some rest, we're almost there and we need to take you straight to medical so Abby can check you up."

After a few minutes, we reached the ship doors. Quickly everyone filed in to avoid the rain and getting sick. All the search parties returned safely, some brought food on their way back.

"I've got it from here O. I can take Clarke to Abby." She nodded as we set Clarke's makeshift gurney down. I scooped her up in my arms gently trying to make sure she was comfortable. "How are you feeling?"

"Never been better." She let out a light laugh, followed by some heavy coughing. I pulled her closer to my chest quickly making my way up to med bay. As I made it in I felt two arms wrap around my waist. Madi. I set Clarke down on one of the beds and wrapped my arms around her. "I told you I'd get her back."

She squeezed me tighter burying her face into my chest. I could feel her warm tears seeping through my shirt. I rubbed her back. "I killed someone," she choked. Her sobs became louder as she came to realization.

Abby made her way towards me placing a hand on my shoulder. "She shot Vanessa when she tried to invade the infirmary. I tried to talk to her, but right now she needs you most," she whispered in my ear before moving to check Clarke's wounds.

I picked Madi up placing her on the foot of Clarke's bed. I brushed the few strands that fell in her face behind her ear. "Look Madi I want you to know what you did wasn't wrong." I wiped a tear that slipped down her soft pale cheek. "Who we are and who we need to be to survive are very different things."

Her eyes were glistening as she stared up at me. Her hands nearly trembling. She swallowed the lump in her throat. "I'm sorry."

I pulled her face back into my chest holding her tight. "You have nothing to be sorry about. You're one of the most badass warriors on Earth remember?"

She let out a light laugh pulling away from me to wipe away her tears. Octavia stood beside me moving her hand to help wipe away her tears. "Warriors don't mourn the lives they've taken, they take pride in the lives they've saved." Madi's smile grew wider as she looked at Octavia standing beside me.

She looked over at Clarke who was calmly laying down watching us. Her face slightly falling at the sight of her injuries. Clarke slowly tried to sit up. I moved to her side to help her up. "Judging by my current situation Madi is the most badass warrior on Earth." She weakly smiled towards her.

Madi immediately jumped off the edge of the bed and moved to Clarke's other side wrapping her arms around her stomach. "I'm sorry."

Clarke pulled away holding Madi in front of her. Her brows furrowed with confusion as she stared at her. "For what? Madi you don't need to be sorry for anything."

"I'm sorry I didn't thank you sooner for being the best mom I could ask for. I almost lost you and…" Clarke pulled her back in for a hug squeezing her tighter than usual. Madi let out a slight groan followed by light laughter. "I love you." She looked from Clarke to me to Octavia. "I love you all."

Clarke cupped her cheek gently in her hand running her thumb across her cheek. "We love you too."

Octavia moved around to Madi's side. "Since Madi is going to be my second I think it's only right that she comes with me to decide what we're going to do with these prisoners."

Madi's eyes lit up as she looked up at Octavia. I let out a chuckle. "Okay commander." I lightly bowed. Earning me a smack to the chest by Octavia from across the bed.

Madi and Octavia quickly left the room, Azuma following them out. I shifted my eyes back to Clarke. Her eyes were softer now, a little lighter. A slight smile on her face. "I think you should rest."

As I place my hand at the small of her back to help her lay back down she grabbed me by the neck of my shirt pulling me into her. Our faces so close I could feel the heat radiating from her. I could feel her eyelashes fluttering only inches from my own. Her breath became heavy.

"Bellamy Blake, if you don't kiss me right now I swear…" My lips immediately connected with hers. The electricity running through my body. How could I have ever lived life without her? Without this feeling? I can't. I won't. Not anymore.

 **Clarke:**

I felt myself melting in his arms, losing myself in this kiss. He tasted like joy, and joy tasted better on Earth. He slowly pulled away. His breathing now heavy, matching mine. A large grin plastered across his face. "I'd give you more, but according to the doctor you should be resting." I pushed out my bottom lip in protest, but he wasn't having it. A smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. "And I recall last time one of us was injured you said, 'We'll have plenty of time to use your energy when you've recovered, for now you should focus on resting.' So, I think you should do just that."

"I hate you." I rolled my eyes at him.

He responded with a chuckle and a gentle kiss to my forehead. "Tell me something I don't know." He winked at me before helping me lay back down. "Get some rest. I need to get a few important things together, I'll be back as soon as I'm done."

I grabbed his hand before he had the chance to leave. "When you get back can you take me to our room." He looked down at me, his brows slightly furrowed. "Please."

He lifted my hand to his mouth as he gently brushed his lips against my knuckles. The pad of his thumb gently tracing over them. "I'll see what I can do, Princess."

With that he turned towards the door leaving me alone in the corner of med bay. I couldn't hold back the large grin across on my face. Bellamy Blake was the only person who could make my blood boil in more ways than one. But I was grateful. He's been my best friend since the beginning and now he's become everything else. I can't imagine being with anyone else.

Sometimes I think about life before Praimfaya. How could I have been so clueless? He'd been by my side the whole time. Supporting me, helping me, fighting for me, caring for me. But not once had I ever considered him as anything more. But now. Now everything's changed.

Seeing him with Madi was beautiful. Knowing that he loves her as much as I do. That he cares for her as much as I do. That he will protect her as much as I do. Not just Bellamy, but Octavia, my mom. Everyone loves her. Everyone cares for her. Murphy, Emori, Monty, Harper, Miller and even Echo. We have suffered a lot over the past few years, but our experiences have only brought us closer.

The door slowly creaked open. Raven, Monty, Miller, Harper, Murphy, and Emori slipped through the door making their way to my bed. Large grins on their faces as they saw me.

"Clarke." Surprisingly Emori was the first person to wrap her arms around me. "I'm so glad you're okay."

I rubbed her back softly before she slowly pulled away looking down at me. "It's nice to see you too, Emori."

Murphy stepped forward wrapping one arm around Emori and using his free hand to give my hand a nice squeeze. "Glad you're not dead."

Emori smacked his chest, a soft smile on her face. "John was freaking out when he found out you were taken." Murphy's face fell to the floor with embarrassment.

Raven squeezed my shoulder. "We all were. You saved our lives too many times, it just wouldn't be fair if we lost you because we were careless." She shook her head as she stared down at me.

I rested my hand on top of hers. "You're not getting rid of me that easily."

Light laughter filled the room as everyone else hugged me. They slowly made their way out of the room waving me goodbye as they gave me some peace and quiet to let me rest. After a few minutes, I felt my eyes becoming heavy. The pain from my wounds was almost nonexistent from the exhaustion I was feeling. I slept most of the way back, but that clearly wasn't enough.

I slipped into a deep sleep when suddenly I felt myself being carried. I leaned my head deeper into Bellamy's chest taking in his scent. His eyes focused ahead as he walked down the hallway. "Mm, you smell good." He pulled me closer to him, laying a soft kiss on the top of my head.

His chocolate eyes moved down to meet mine. "I can help you take a shower tomorrow." His eyes lighting up.

I tilted my head to one side, giving him a slight smirk. "Are you trying to say I smell?"

He leaned forward punching in the code for our room and gently setting me down. "You do smell." A large grin on his face as he stared down at me. I smacked him on the chest. He let out a groan. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't hit me all the time."

I rolled my eyes. "And I would appreciate it if you were nicer. But we can't all get what we want."

He turned around grabbing a bottle of water from the desk and placing it in my hand. "Abby said you need to drink water, you're slightly dehydrated. I'm assuming they didn't give you much while you were gone." His face fell at the thought. I weakly smiled before taking a few sips. "Now let's sleep. It's late."

I nodded. He turned around beginning to strip down. Starting with his shirt, then his shoes and socks, then his holster and gun, and then his pants. I leaned against the wall and watched him as he took it all off. Admiring every inch of his beautiful body.

He turned around quickly, a smirk on his face as he stared back at me. "Are you just going to sit there and gawk at me?" I rolled my eyes before leaning down to remove my pants. As I reached down Bellamy placed his hand on mine. "It's okay, let me do it for you." I leaned back letting him unbutton my pants, slightly lifting myself up as he gently pulled them down. I let out a groan as he pulled it down over my bullet wound. "Abby said to be very careful. Your wound is still very sensitive and it'll take some time for you to be able to walk on it."

I grabbed Bellamy's shoulders quickly pulling him so his face was inches from mine. "Thank you." I gently pressed a kiss against his lips. Wrapping my hand around the back of his neck to pull him deeper.

He cupped my face in his hands, slowly pulling away. Both of us were breathing heavily. "As much as I want this right now, you need to rest." I frowned at him. He rubbed his thumb across my bottom lip. Brushing his lips against mine once more. "Rest. Now."

He helped me lay down, setting a few pillows under my leg to keep it elevated and to keep my blood flowing. He made his way around our bed laying down beside me. I rested my head on his shoulder burying my face into the crook of his neck. Bellamy wrapped his arm around my waist slowly pulling me closer to him. I laid soft kisses on his cheeks and along the line of his jaw slowly stopping around the base of his neck.

He gave my waist a soft squeeze, his eyes still closed, and his face relaxed. "You're making it hard for me to let you rest, Clarke." A little annoyance in his voice.

I kissed the soft spot in his neck once more. "Maybe I'm not trying to rest."

His eyes shot open immediately, his gaze meeting mine. He leaned into my neck placing a soft kiss. "Please, sleep tonight. I couldn't sleep while you were gone." I felt a tear slip down my cheek. I hadn't even thought about how Bellamy may have felt while I was gone. How guilty he might have felt. He moved his hand up, wiping away my tear. His eyes filled with sadness. "I love you, Clarke. Good night." After a few minutes, I fell asleep safely in Bellamy's arms. His body radiating warmth to mine.

After a few hours, I felt a sharp pain shoot up my leg, taking my breath away. Half asleep I put slight pressure on my leg, trying to keep my blood flowing to ease some pain. As I peered down at my leg I saw a figure standing at the end of our bed. I blinked trying to get a better view, but it was too dark. I shifted trying to reach for the light, but Bellamy pulled me closer to him. Lightly slipping from his grip I turned on the light. Alexandra stood there almost lifelessly in the corner of the room. Tears running down her face.

What was she doing here? What did she want? How did she get out? How did she find us? I was frozen. Every bone in my body was unresponsive. I was sitting in shock, completely paralyzed.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Well we're getting closer to the end of my story and if there are any suggestions or ideas you want me to add let me know and I promise to do my best to give you what you want :) Any relationships you want to see or any perspectives you want more of. I'm going to work on an au after this so if anything I can always incorporate your ideas in that. :) Thanks for reading! xx**

 **Maybe**

 **Clarke:**

As I stared at her she hesitantly moved closer. Her eyes wide, full of fear. She was breathing hard as she stood beside me. Tears pooled in her eyes. "I'm not here to hurt you. I just wanted to talk to you," she whispered. Her voice cracked even at a whisper. Clearly, she was distraught.

I narrowed my eyes at her. "Me? Why me?" I tried to keep my voice low so Bellamy would remain asleep beside me. The last thing I need right now is Bellamy's over-protectiveness.

Her breathing leveled as she kneeled beside me on her knees, she rested her hands on the side of the bed clasped together. "Because I know even though Bishop tried to hurt you that you're the only one who can make everyone understand that I played no part in it. I know that you understand that I warned you and that I don't deserve to die with the rest of them." She was literally begging me. A tear slipped down her cheek as she stared at me. It was true, she did warn us. She did prove her worth. She may not deserve to die with the rest. Even when the rest of the prisoners planned their attack with Vanessa, she remained in her cell.

She's the one person out of the prisoners that didn't want anything to do with them. But a part of me wasn't ready to believe she was worth saving. "Maybe."

She grabbed my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Look, I'm sorry for everything that happened between Bellamy and me. It won't happen ever again. Just, please. Help me." She rested her forehead against my hand. "I don't want to die like this. Please. Give me a chance."

Just as I was about to respond Azuma burst through the door. A sword in his hand ready to fight. Once he took notice of her inferior position he was taken back. Standing in the doorway in complete shock.

Bellamy jumped up once he heard the door open, completely shocked by what was happening. I rested my free hand on top of Alexandra's head. "Azuma, we will not be executing Alexandra." Bellamy whipped his head to me, his eyes burning through my cheek as he stared at me. "Take her back to her cell and please tell Octavia to meet me there."

Alexandra stared at me in complete awe. Her mouth slightly opened, her eyes wide, and her eyebrows raised. Azuma nodded as he gently grabbing Alexandra, pulling her to her feet. Even as he guided her out of our room she stared back at me in complete shock. Tears flowing down her cheeks.

Once everyone was gone I turned my attention back to Bellamy. He stared at me in complete admiration. A slight smile on his face. His hand found its way to my cheek, gently cupping it in the palm of his calloused hand. "You don't have to do this."

I leaned my face into his hand, placing my hand on top of his. "She saved your life Bellamy." I closed my eyes, pushing back the tears that urged to slide down my cheeks. "If I killed every girl who thought she was in love with you, we'd have a hard time with reproducing and continuing on with the human race." He let out a heavy laugh. A large smile on his face as he leaned in gently pressing his forehead to mine. "Besides, we could use another doctor around here."

He pulled away quickly, catching me off guard. His eyes narrowed at me with his brows crinkled together creating a deep wrinkle between his eyebrows. "But you aren't going to go talk to Octavia about this right now. You should be resting."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, if you must know Dr. Blake, I'm not going alone." His face shifted from anger to confusion. "You're taking me, I can't walk on this leg." I gave him a little wink, earning me another laugh.

"What else are husbands for, right?" I could feel the blood rush to my face. A sly smirk on his face as he stared down at me. He wrapped his arm around my waist gently pulling me closer to him. Placing a soft kiss behind my ear. "I think I could get used to that title," he whispers, immediately sending chills down my body.

I pulled away, tilting my head away from him. "I would love to further discuss the title of our relationship, but we have important business to attend." I kept a hint of sarcasm in my tone. There's nothing more than I would want than to be with Bellamy Blake forever, but is this the right time? Would there ever be a right time? We still have so much to do. We still aren't at all prepared for winter. But all I can think about is making Bellamy mine.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when I'm jolted back. Bellamy pulls me down, burying his face in my neck. Leaving sloppy kisses up my neck, along my jawline, and all over my face. As he left kisses all over me, his hands ran along my sides. I lace my fingers through his hair, throwing my head back to give him more room. Right as I do, he pulls away jumping to his feet. "What are you laying back like that for Princess? We have business to attend, remember?"

I purse my lips as I stare up at him, my eyes wide and wanting more. I whip the covers off my legs revealing my bare legs. His breathing immediately becomes heavy as his eyes run along my body, his jaw tensing. "I would go, but it seems I need some assistance." His eyes shoot back to mine. Two can play at this game. I reach over to the night stand, grabbing the clean new pair of pants that we set out for today. "I can't seem to get these on myself, you know because of my leg." I dramatically wince as I touch my thigh. "Can you please help me?" A slight innocence in my tone.

He makes his way around the bed, placing the tip of his finger on my ankle making his way up. I can feel the electricity in his touch, but I kept my face as straight as possible. Once he reaches my thigh he stops, pulling his finger up to his chin. "I'll see what I can do." His eyes narrowed down at me as he takes the pants from my hand. Without breaking eye contact he gently places my feet through both holes. Pulling the pants gently up my legs, carefully stretching out the material over my wound. Once he's done he buttons up my pants, his hands lingering around my waist.

I can feel my heart racing as I stare down at him. He slips my feet into my shoes, quickly turning away to slip a shirt on. I watch him as he makes his way around the room. Putting on his holster, placing his gun in it, placing his radio on the back of his pants. Once he's done he makes his way back to my side.

The radio cracks and Octavia's voice echoes throughout the room. "Bellamy. Clarke. Where are you?"

Before Bellamy can grab his radio, I grab it from him. A slight surprise in his face as I pull it up to respond. "On our way now." I clip the radio to the back of his waistband. His eyes narrowed down at me with amusement. "You know for someone who wants to attend to business you're far too distracted."

He leans in placing a kiss to my forehead. "You're a distracting person." I bite my lip to hold back my smile. He does one last check of my leg before wrapping his arms around me. One arm wrapped behind my knees, and another around the small of my back. I lean back towards the door opening it as he carried me.

Once in the hallway, we're taken back by the small crowd of delinquents formed outside our room. Monty, Raven, Harper, Miller, and Murphy. Smiles across all their faces as they catch a glimpse of me in Bellamy's arms.

"What are you guys doing here?" Bellamy's face back to its normal hardened form. His brows slightly furrowed and his nostrils flaring.

"We heard that Alexandra broke into your room. We just wanted to make sure everything was okay." Monty placed his hand on my shoulder. A slight smile on his face.

"Yeah, we're fine. Just going to Alexandra's cell for some interrogation." It's sad that interrogations had become so common. They all exchanged a slight look of concern as they stood in front of us.

"Shouldn't you be resting, Clarke? Can't one of us do this for you?" Harper pressed her fingertips into Bellamy's shoulder in an attempt to push him back into our room, but he wasn't having it.

I couldn't resist rolling my eyes as I looked around at all of them. "I think I can handle interrogating Alexandra." They all nodded. "Go back to sleep, everything's fine. But it won't be if you guys come to work tomorrow tired because you were up worrying about me."

There was light laughter echoing throughout the hall before everyone headed their separate ways. Bellamy continued on down the hall and towards the stairs. I leaned into his chest listening to his heart beat out of his chest. "You know they just care about you." I tilted my head back slightly to get a better look at Bellamy's face, his eyes focused ahead of him as he made his way through the door. "They know you can handle an interrogation, they just want you to know that you don't have to do it alone."

"You all spent the past 6 years with each other, you got to lean on each other. But I didn't have that luxury. I had Madi of course, but I was always in charge. It's just going to take some time to getting used to having that support again." Bellamy's eyes shifted to me. His face full of guilt. He turned his attention away from me. I brought my hand to his face. "Bellamy. It's not your fault I was alone. It's my fault for not getting back in time. You made a choice as the leader, and we both know being the leader is never easy."

He leaned down leaving a gentle kiss on the top of my head. The rest of our walk was silent. I could tell Bellamy carried a lot of guilt, but that's a conversation we'd need to save for another time. Once we reached Alexandra's cell Octavia turned back her eyes meeting us. A slight smile on her face. Alexandra's eyes grew wider as she stared at Bellamy carrying me, but immediately fell to the floor.

Octavia gestured for Alexandra to get out of the chair, she did as she was told. Immediately Bellamy set me down. "Do you want me to bring something so you can elevate your leg?"

I moved my leg around a little bit, a soft groan slipping out as I stretched my leg causing Bellamy to flinch. "No, I think I need a little break from all the elevation."

He gives me a cautious nod before standing behind me. Alexandra curls up in the middle of the room. Her knees pressed to her chest, her chin resting on her knees as she stared at the floor. Octavia stepped closer to her.

"Why should we let _you_ live?" Octavia's voice was angry. Her arms folded in front of her as she stared down at her.

"She saved Bellamy's life. More than once." Octavia is taken back by the softness in my voice. Her hair whipping over her shoulder as she turned to look at me. "She tried to warn us about Bishop too. We just didn't listen to her." Just as the words slipped from my mouth I regretted it. I shouldn't have said that. Octavia already felt guilty for what happened to me.

"I'm so…" Octavia started to speak but stopped as soon as I put my hand up.

"Octavia, it's not your fault. We couldn't have possibly known to trust her that quickly. You have nothing to feel bad about. I've done worse things knowingly. You had no idea and you couldn't have with the little information you had." Her face hardened once again. I had left Octavia to die in Tondc. She's become a stronger leader than I ever was. She may doubt herself, but I know she's done much better than I have.

I felt Bellamy's hand wrap around my shoulder. Relieving me from my thoughts almost instantly. "She could be good for us O. She's a doctor."

"I may not like her, but she doesn't deserve to die." Octavia's eyes focused on the floor as she took everything we said into consideration. She began to pace back and forth slowly, looking back and forth from the floor to Alexandra.

After a few minutes of silence, Octavia cleared her throat. "Fine. We will spare your life."

Alexandra's eyes shot up. Almost glowing with excitement. She wrapped her arms around Octavia's leg hugging it with all her strength. Octavia pulled herself from her grasp as quickly as possible, moving beside me. Her arms still crossed and her face still hard. "Octavia is still the commander so if you want to discuss anything else from now on you need to go to her. No more coming to Bellamy or me."

Everyone nodded in agreement. "You will be given a room eventually, but until then this cell is your room. We won't lock it so you can come and go as you wish, but there will be some restrictions." Octavia looked over at Bellamy and I before turning her attention back to Alexandra on the floor. She was hugging herself with all her excitement. "Before we let you treat anyone, you need to get checked out by Abby, Jackson, and Clarke. Once they all clear you, we'll talk about your duties. Until you are cleared you will have an escort with you at all times. You can't talk to any of the prisoners. And you can't go near their room again." She gave a pointed look in our direction. Her tone was strict, she was beaming with confidence. One thing I admired most about Octavia was that even though she had her doubts she always picked herself back up immediately.

"Deal." She stood up quickly, a large grin on her face. "Thank you. Thank you so much." She looked down at me, her hands clasped beneath her chin.

"All eyes will be on you for a while Alexandra, so don't mess it up." I gestured for Bellamy to pick me up. As he began to carry me out I looked over once more to see tears fall down Alexandra's eyes. A large smile on her face as she watched us all leave.

Once we made it in front of our room Octavia let out a large sigh. "We have a few hours before we need to start preparing for the executions, so I suggest you two get some rest. I'm going to talk to Jackson and Abby about possibly getting you a wheel chair because I'm sure if Bellamy has to carry you around all day we won't get much done." We all let out heavy laughter.

Once Octavia turned to leave Bellamy leaned into the pad on the side of our door punching in our code. What was the point of a coded lock if everyone could get through our door. Literally, everyone knew the code to our room. I rolled my eyes as Bellamy laid me down. He immediately rested my leg up on a set of pillows.

"You get some sleep, I have a few things I need to get ready for tomorrow." He pulled the covers over me.

Before he could pull away I grabbed his hand. "What things? Why can't we just embrace the few hours we have before we need to be back out there?" I felt my heart ache a little, we had been away from each other on and off for the past few days. All I want to do is take advantage of every minute we're together.

He pulled my hand up to his lips gentling lacing my knuckles in soft kisses that made their way up my arm and up to my neck. Once he got to the soft spot behind my ear he stopped. "Patience Princess. You just need to be patient." Goose bumps ran across my body. I leaned up to kiss the base of his neck, his true weakness, but before I could he pulled away. "A few hours without me won't kill you."

I leaned back crossing my arms in front of me, my eyes narrowed. "Bellamy." My tone was stern, angry even.

"Clarke." He smirked slightly. The kind of smirk where his cheek formed soft dimples and his lips curled perfectly. His smile was contagious. He leaned back down brushing his lips softly against mine. "I'll be back before you're awake, promise." He turned around and quickly slipped out the door.

This isn't fair. I'm supposed to be the Commander of Death, but I get weak in the knees every time I look into those stupid almond shaped eyes or get a glimpse of that Bellamy Blake smirk. I let out a large puff of air before laying back, throwing a pillow over my face.

After lying in bed for a few minutes I find myself thinking of Alexandra. I'm a little relieved knowing she's going to live. Maybe she would be good for us, good to us. Judging by how she healed Bellamy she's a good doctor. She could do good things for our people. Maybe we could be friends. Maybe. Just Maybe.

 **Alexandra:**

I tried to fight the tears, but they just wouldn't stop. I'm glad these people were going to accept me, even if I had to prove myself it's better than dying or even living among Bishop and the rest of them. I've always been the outcast out here, it's nice to finally just be accepted. I could live with being watched constantly and having to prove myself because at least I would have a chance to be normal.

I just wish that Clarke wasn't around. If she wasn't here Bellamy wouldn't be so blind. But that's just something I'll have to live with. There's plenty of people among them, I'm sure I'll forget all about Bellamy. I have to, especially since I'll be working with Clarke.

I was pulled from my thoughts when a beautiful woman walked through the door of my cell carrying a laptop. Long brown hair, tan skin, brown almond like eyes. She had a limp and a brace around her leg. I quickly wiped away my tears, sitting up against the wall so that I could give her my full attention. She sat down on the chair in front of me, but her eyes were focused on her laptop. Another woman made her way behind her, she was carrying a folder and a small box of medical supplies. This was the same woman who had helped heal me when I had been beaten by Clarke and Octavia. I'm assuming she's one of their main doctors. She had my stethoscope wrapped around her neck. My heart clenched at the sight, but this was just something I'd need to get used to.

I focused my attention back on the woman with the laptop. "Hello, Alexandra. I'm Raven and this is Abby." She gave a pointed look in the direction of the other woman. "I'm here to go over your rules and just small kinks we may need to go over. Abby is going do a quick check up."

I gave a weak smile as I brought my attention to Abby. She stepped closer pulling out a stethoscope and a thermometer. As she began to take my vitals she took in my appearance, looking at every bruise and cut. "You seem to be looking a little better since the last time I saw you." She continued to run her fingers along some other bruises. Slowly bringing her eyes back to mine with a small smile on her face. "I'm one of the main doctors. I'm sure after we all check you out you'll make a lovely addition to our medical bay. I saw the work you did on Bellamy and I must say you've got good hands."

"Thank you. For everything. I hope we can learn from one another." Abby seems a lot like Clarke. Smart, confident, strong.

"I'm just glad that you're okay." She nodded before quickly packing her things. She turned towards the door, as she almost got out of the door she flashed me one more smile.

Raven brought her focus back to me, setting her laptop on the edge of the bed. "Well as you know you will be assigned a guard at all times." She turned towards the door of the cell. "Come on in guys." Immediately four men walked in and stood behind Raven, their arms folded in front of them. Their eyes all fixed on me, all of their faces remained expressionless. All expected of members of a guard. "These four will all take turns watching you. This is not only for us, but also for you. We don't know how people will react to letting you live among us yet so this is for your safety." She paused and gave me a look to make sure I was paying attention. I gave her a slight nod. "This is Nathan Miller, he will be taking the first shift for guarding you." A tall tan man stepped forward. His face slightly hardened. He slightly nodded at me.

"Nice to meet you, Nathan." I stretched out my arm to shake his hand, but he didn't shake it.

"You can call me Miller." I nodded and brought my attention back to Raven.

"Then we have Major Costa. He will be taking over some time after Miller." A dark-skinned man stepped forward. He was bald and looked mean, but he gave me a small smile before stepping back into line with the rest of them. "There's also Azuma. He is scheduled after Major Costa. But that may be scheduled to change because Octavia…"

"I talked to her, it's fine." This man was about my height. Dark hair, dark eyes. Chiseled features. He looked strong.

"Well, never mind then." The man moved back into line with Major Costa and Miller. "Lastly, we have Penn." The last man just stared at me, unlike the others he seemed angry more distant. "The schedule is still subject to change, but for now this is what we've got. They'll escort you around the ship wherever you need or want to go. They will also be here to watch you when you sleep. We just want to take all the precautions now before anything gets out of control."

She leaned in placing her hand on mine. "Thank you." I placed my other hand on top of hers. It was comforting knowing that they actually cared about me enough to do all this. They didn't have to.

She weakly smiled before pulling her hand away. I couldn't help but feel a little sad at the loss, but I ignored it. The men filed out of the room, Miller stood at the end of the door facing the hallway. "There's a few rules Octavia told me to specifically go over with you so that we don't have any issues. Okay?"

"Okay." I moved my legs over the edge of the bed so I was sitting face to face with her.

"You're not allowed to go anywhere without an assigned guard. If by any chance we need one of them for something another guard will come in and relieve them. But until that happens you can't go anywhere. If you do then you'll be punished." She brought her eyes up to me in search of some recognition. "You can walk around the ship all you want, but if you want to go outside you need an extra guard. But you can't do that until you're cleared."

"Do you know how long it'll take until I'm cleared? I just haven't had the chance to go out yet." What was the point of coming down the Earth if I don't even get to go out and see everything? Everyone always made fun of me because of how much I used to read about Earth and all the different landscapes and creatures that lived among it. Now I'd get to see it all for myself.

"I don't know, that really depends on you." Of course. My fate lied on Clarke. She did save me, but was she really willing to forgive me? I guess time would tell. "You have to stay away from Bellamy and Clarke's room. The code to their room has changed so not that you could break in anymore, but it's just necessary that I go over that." She lightly let out a chuckle.

Their room was once my family's room. It had changed a lot since we all lived there. Since Bishop had my parents killed I had no one. No friends, no family. The only reason they kept me around was that I was the only doctor other than my mother. They couldn't afford to lose me.

"Once you start working in the medical bay you'll take over a few responsibilities. You won't work alone you'll have Eric Jackson, Abby Griffin, and Clarke Griffin working with you." Abby and Clarke Griffin. That's why they seemed so similar. Abby is Clarke's mother. "But since there are only four doctors for over 1,100 people you'll need to be open to teaching and working at all hours of the day."

"It's okay. I was the only doctor on the ship before, but I did teach a few others. I understand." This was all expected. They needed me. Why else would they have kept me alive? I guess I did try to help them, but they also need me. That's the only reason anyone has ever kept me around or even cared about me.

I could feel a lump grow in my throat, but this wasn't the time. Raven leaned forward placing a hand on my knee. "Octavia, Clarke, and Bellamy may not say it but I know they appreciate you. I'm sorry you went through this. But you're one of us now. We will protect you." I could feel the tears pooling up in my eyes again. But I didn't let them fall. "I may not know you, but I know enough to understand you're a good person."

I found myself moving closer to her when we were interrupted by Miller entering the room. Clearing his throat. Raven's hand shot back into her lap, she quickly leaned back into her chair. "I'm sorry. Octavia needs you in the main hall. We need to start preparing everything."

Raven instantly stood up, nearly throwing the laptop over in the process. She cleared her throat. "Well, that's all for now. If you need anything just have Miller radio me. Or anyone else." She quickly turned around to leave, as she almost made her way out the door she waved her hand. The guard let out a heavy laugh before following her out. He stood outside of my cell door his hands wrapped around a gun tightly.

Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Maybe they didn't just spare me because they needed me. Whatever the case is it has to be better than living under Bishop.


	25. Chapter 25

**Forgiveness**

 **Bellamy:**

I knocked on Abby and Kane's door. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest. Why was I so nervous? It's not like they'd kill me or anything. What's the worst that could happen?

Suddenly the door swung open and Kane stood in the doorway concern all over his face. "Bellamy. Is everything okay?"

Abby popped in by his side, looking me up and down. She pushed past Kane grabbing both my shoulders. "Bellamy, you look like you're going to throw up. Come on, let's go to the medical bay."

"No. I'm fine. I just needed to talk to you. To both of you." She gave my shoulders a soft squeeze, turning to walk back into their room.

Kane sat down in a chair by their desk, Abby sat at the edge of their unmade bed. Their room was smaller, but it was a nice fit for the both of them. "What did you want to talk about? Is everything okay? Is Clarke okay?" I could see her body tense. Kane clenched his jaw. I was standing in the corner of the room, crossing my arms across my chest.

"Yeah. Everything is fine. Clarke is fine. We're actually better than fine." I weakly smiled at her trying to lighten the mood. "I actually wanted to talk about Clarke. Clarke and me." Her smile grew as she stared up at me. Her elbows resting on her knees as she leaned forward. Her fingers twiddling with the ring on her necklace. "You both know how much I care about Clarke. I always have."

Abby stood up taking a few steps towards me. Her hand tightened around my forearm. "Bellamy. I know. You don't need to tell me. You've taken care of Clarke when I couldn't. You've kept her alive. You'd do anything for her."

"I'm sorry I left her behind during Praimfaya. I had no choice. But I promise I suffered every day because of it." I closed my eyes, trying to get a grip on reality.

I opened my eyes when I felt Abby slip something into my hand. She used her free hand close my hand into a fist. "I know you're sorry. I know you didn't want to leave her behind. I know it's been hard on both of you these past few years. But when you're ready, use this."

I opened my hand to find the ring that once hung from Abby's neck in the palm of my hand. "I can't take this Abby."

She rested her hand on mine. "No. I don't need it anymore." She looked down at the band around her finger. A smile on her face to match Kane's. "Clarke would love to have the ring her father once gave me. But don't give it to her until you're ready."

I pulled Abby into a tight embrace. "Thank you."

She gave me one last squeeze before holding me an arm's length away from her. Looking up at me with a smile on her face. "You two will be happy again. Just stop waiting for the right time because that may never come around." Kane stepped up behind her placing his arm around her shoulder. Abby stepped back folding her arms in front of her. Flashing a soft smile at Kane. "And if you were coming in here looking for forgiveness, there was no need."

"I was here for your blessings more than anything else." They both let out a heavy laugh. "But it's nice to know you forgive me."

"We've all done things we aren't proud of, but you can't let that define who you are," Kane responded. His voice was low but confident.

I nodded at him slightly. "Thanks for the talk. I'll see you both out there." I quickly turned around making my way out.

Abby had already somewhat given me her blessing but this was different, this was better. I can't believe she gave me her wedding ring. I can't believe she trusts me enough to spend the rest of my life with her daughter, after all the things I'd done. But she's right. We've all done things we're not proud of.

I put the ring in the inside pocket of my jacket, the pocket closest to my chest. I needed to talk to Octavia about this too. I know she's got a lot on her plate, but it's only fair that she hears about it from me.

I'm walking down the hall when I bump in Azuma. "Hey Azuma. Have you seen Octavia?"

He patted my shoulder. "She's in her room with Indra. Getting ready for today."

I made my way to her room bursting through the door. Octavia whipped her head back to look at me, her hair flying over her shoulder. Her face was tense, but once her eyes met mine she relaxed. She turned back to Indra. "Get everyone down there. I'll come down as soon as I'm done here."

Indra nodded picking up her sword and moving past me. I moved around her and made my way to the edge of Octavia's bed. "Can we talk?"

She began pacing back and forth. "Yes. We need to talk about what you need to do today. Azuma is running the hunting parties. Kane is training the guard. And..."

"Octavia." I cut her off. She froze looking back to me. Her eyes analyzing my face. "I want to talk to you about this." I pulled the ring out of my pocket holding it in the palm of my hand.

Octavia stepped forward picking up the ring from my hand. Her eyes wide as she looked back and forth from the ring to my face. "Is this Abby's ring?"

"She gave it to me." Her eyes grew wider. Frozen with shock. "Abby thinks that I should use it when I'm ready."

She stepped closer placing the ring back in my hand, wrapping her hand around mine. "Are you ready?"

I placed my other hand on top of hers. "I don't know. I barely just got her back. If I rush things, she'll only push me away."

"She loves you, Bell. She always has. Whenever you decide to do it, I support you." She let go of my hands, letting out a laugh.

I joined in laughing with her. "I think I just need to talk to her. See what she wants. But I can talk to her later. We have a lot of work that needs to be done."

"No talk to Clarke today. After the meeting, you're going to take her back to your room and talk to her. When you're done I'll put you to work." She folded her arms in front of her.

"Fine." She grabbed me and pulled me in for a hug. Brushing her lips on my cheek.

"You go get Clarke. I'll see you down there with everyone else, okay?" She turned around quickly, taking in a deep breath, pushing her shoulders back, holding her head up as she left the room.

I followed her out, picking up a radio, the blueprints to the cabins we wanted to make, and gripping the ring tightly. Octavia was good at being a leader. Separating her feelings from leading. It's a lot easier having her as the leader. It gives Clarke and me the chance to relax a little. And focus on taking care of Madi.

 **Raven:**

That was awkward. But she seems nice. Genuine even. Hopefully, this goes smoothly. I know it was hard for all of Wonkru to integrate, but this may be so much harder. Trust doesn't come easily to any of us really. Maybe Alexandra will surprise us.

As I'm walking I bump straight into Bellamy. "Watch it Reyes." He bends down to pick up a few things. I get down to help him. When I freeze at the sight of a ring. My eyes shoot up to meet his. He was flustered. "Uh. I'm getting it cleaned for Abby. You know just being nice."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Bellamy."

"Raven." His face fell back into its normal hardened state as he stared at me. He quickly stood up, grabbing his last few things. "I've got to go get Clarke for the meeting. Meet you down there?"

"If you say so." He turned away quickly making his way towards their room. Not once turning back. I stood up and continued down the hall.

It was obvious Bellamy had loved Clarke for a long time. I knew it as soon as I had landed down on Earth. It was just something we all ignored, we knew it would happen when it was meant to be. The way he looked at her said it all. It was how every girl wanted to be looked at. Not to mention all the stupid things he did to protect her. If there was anyone else Bellamy Blake loved as much as his sister, it'd be Clarke. All these years he spent in space said it all. He spent every day waiting for her to radio. He spent every day responding to her knowing she couldn't hear him. It was nice to see them finally together. Before she radioed he drank himself into an oblivion until Monty and I cut him off.

As I got closer to the main hall the echoes of everyone talking got louder. Hundreds of different conversations all throughout the room. There were crowds of people all around the main door and inside.

Forcing my way through the crowd I felt a hand at the small of my back. I peeked over my shoulder to see Murphy helping me weave through the crowd. "I _don't_ need your help."

"I know, but I'm helping you anyways." Murphy kept his eyes forward. Pushing through people while guiding me behind him. He stops for a second leaning in towards me. "I know you still hate me. But I don't want things to be like that between us anymore." His voice was low and husky.

"You don't get to dictate how I feel about you." I could almost taste the venom in my voice.

His eyes shot back to mine. But as soon as I was about to say something he pulled me to the corner of the room. His hand now wrapped around my wrist. "Raven. Stop." He glared down at me, but I kept my eyes focused to the side of him. "I love you. Okay? Is that what you want to hear? Because I do."

I rolled my eyes. Crossing my arms in front of me. "Obviously you love me. Who wouldn't? I'm amazing." My eyes were locked onto his.

He gave my wrist a soft squeeze. "I do love you." He inhaled deeply breaking eye contact to recollect his thoughts. "But I love Emori too." I felt like my heart just got ripped out of my chest. But I knew this was going to happen. Maybe that's why I didn't want to talk to him. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to." His eyes scanned the crowd of people around the room.

"She knows. But she also knows you've been one of the best friends and that we can't keep ignoring each other." His voice slightly cracked. He let go of my wrist. His voice became lower. "I shouldn't have kissed you. I'm sorry for doing this to you, Raven."

"John Murphy, owning up to his mistakes?" I tried to lighten the mood. He was right. We'd been through too much to throw it all away.

"An anomaly, I know. But some things are more important than my ego." I let out a slight laugh. It was nice to talk to him again. I may never admit it, but I did miss him. "You're a good person, Raven. The kind of person to save the world and everyone in it. I'm just a cockroach."

"It's okay. You'll always be my cockroach." I gave him a brief hug before turning to find Octavia.

Even if I can't be with him, I'm happy for him. I'm happy that we know where we stand. Happy that he'll still always be my best friend.

"Hey Raven, you ready?" Monty grabbed my wrist as I made my way through the crowd. I gave him a slight nod as I dragged him behind me.

Soon we found our way to Octavia. She stood there talking to Indra and Azuma. Her eyes shot to mine. A slight smile on her face. "Glad you could make it. How did everything go with Alexandra?"

I cleared my throat to focus myself on Octavia. "It was fine. She'll be fine. What can I do for you?"

Her brows furrowed slightly as she stared at me before focusing back to the task at hand. "Well, today I'm going to need you to pick out your apprentices. We need to start training people now. I also need you look into the security systems. They're down in medical bay and that's one of our most important wings." I gave her a slight nod. How are we supposed to train all these people? There's maybe a total of 4 engineers and 2 mechanics, but there's over 200 people who want to become apprentices. "Monty, you'll be working with agriculture. We need to find a way to grow crops during the winter. I know some of our people have started their work outside, so maybe we can find something to protect what they've already made?"

"I think I can put together a nice greenhouse. But I'll need some help. You think Bellamy can get a few men together so we can start that?" Octavia pressed her lips into a hard line as she stared at Monty. Contemplating what to say next.

"Bellamy actually has something important to do today, but he can get a group of people to help you out tomorrow." There was some hesitation in her voice. But from what? What could he possibly be doing that's so important? "For today, come up with your blueprint. Get a list of the materials you'll need and then help Raven."

I brought the palm of my hand to my forehead in an attempt to stop my brain from working, even if it was for a few seconds. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by all the responsibilities. By everyone constantly relying on me. Everyone else has someone to lean on, but I've been alone all this time. Octavia has Azuma. Clarke has Bellamy. Abby has Kane. Monty has Harper. Miller has Jackson. Murphy has Emori. Even Echo found someone to lean on. I don't have that. Maybe I never will.

 **I'm going to wait to write my next chapter. I need to know what you want to happen between Bellamy and Clarke. Seriously like comment and let me know. I'll end this story off on whatever note you think seems right because personally, I can't decide. Thanks for reading. xx**


	26. Chapter 26

**Octavia:**

I've never felt like a stronger leader than standing up here in front of Wonkru right now. We're finally getting everything together. No more threats, no more living in constant fear, no more doubting our abilities. We're finally in a good place. I know we are here today because of me and my family. Bellamy, Indra, Azuma, Clarke, Abby, Jackson, Raven, Monty, Miller, Kane, Harper, Murphy, and Emori. We've all come so far. It's nice to have them all by my side. I still feel like I can't trust Echo, everyone else may trust her but I don't. I don't think I ever will, but she's a good fighter and I guess she can be useful.

Kane took a few steps towards me, pulling me from my thoughts, a slight smile on his face. "Bellamy and Clarke are here, we'll do a quick brief and then we can start." He gave me shoulder a nice squeeze.

Kane and I may have had our differences over the past few years, but he has helped me a lot. He's made me a better leader. I rested my hand on top of his hand briefly smiling at him. "Thank you."

He nodded before turning towards Bellamy who was carrying Clarke through the crowd. I made my way on the platform in the front of the room. Azuma stood to my left and Indra stood to my right. The echoes of conversations and laughter around the room slowly came to an end as everyone's attention focused on me.

"Today we go back to being us. We have survived, now we will thrive." Smiles filled the faces of everyone around the room. "Some of you will learn new things, some of you will go back to doing what you're best at but all of you will be given the chance to live a new life." People let out cheers around the room. I looked around at Clarke, Bellamy, Raven sitting in front of me large smiles on their faces.

"Now we get to work. We need to prepare for the winter. We need to build our homes. Gather our food. These next few months will not be easy. But nothing about life on the ground has ever been easy." I folded my arms in front of me as I stared out at the crowd of people exchanging glances and minor comments. "You've all been assigned to different sections and different shifts all lead by our best."

Slowly everyone joined me on the platform. Bellamy, Clarke, Kane, Abby, Jackson, Raven, Monty, Miller, Harper, Murphy, Emori, and Echo made their way up. Bellamy sat Clarke down on a chair placed at the end of the platform. "Azuma and Miller will be leading hunting parties every day."

Miller made his way towards Azuma giving each other reassuring nods. Azuma took a step forward. "We will divide you all into groups between the both of us. We will leave every morning at first light and return by sundown. Today we will go over the rules and techniques to make sure you all are prepared, but the actual hunting will not begin until tomorrow."

He stepped back into line with the others. "Bellamy and Murphy will be in charge of the groups building the cabins."

Bellamy stepped forward beside me. "We will have the biggest group because we have the biggest job. Construction of the cabins will be continuous. Today we will be assigning everyone with different shifts. I know we have the ship, but we all did not spend the past 6 years locked up only to stay that way." Everyone let out loud cheers throughout the crowd. The echoes of happy people filling the air.

Bellamy's head was held high as he stepped back in line with everyone else. He was a history nerd back on the Ark. I blame my mom for it, she always read old literature to us. Bellamy loved it. He read all about life before the apocalypse. He loved reading about old architecture before the first apocalypse and now he was going to be able to put all that knowledge to work. I guess it wasn't all as useless as I used to call it.

I cleared my throat getting everyone's attention again. Immediately everyone's eyes focused back on me. "Indra, Kane, and Echo will oversee guard training."

Kane stepped forward as Echo made her way towards Indra. "Those who are already a part of the guards will continue on with their duties, new recruits will be trained once a day every day. After training, you will join Murphy and Bellamy with construction. As he said earlier it is a big job that we all need to contribute to."

I stepped forward immediately sending Kane back into the line with everyone else. "Abby, Clarke, and Jackson will be running medical bay and working with all the apprentices."

Clarke held her head up as she sat behind me. Abby rested her hand on her shoulder standing behind her. "Medical bay runs nonstop so you will need to be prepared to work all hours of the day. Clarke will teach you the basics, Jackson will oversee your work, and I will be there to handle anything too intricate."

Abby's eyes met mine, a slight nod in my direction to tell me she was done. "Those of you working in medical bay will also be helping with executions. I have set executions to start this evening." There was a dead silence across the room, everyone's faces tense. It's understandable considering all that we've been through these past few weeks. "Those of you who are already established members of our guard will be working under Harper."

Harper cleared her throat. She was nervous, but it was expected considering she had never truly been a leader. With as many people as we had though, she would need to step up and hold some weight. She tightened her hands into fists at her side. "The rotation will remain constant until the recruits join us. You will either be working around the prisoners or working as lookouts. The shifts you have now will be the shifts you work now."

She fell back into line with everyone else. She let out a large sigh of relief. "The rest of you will be rummaging through the materials in this ship with Emori. Running inventory on food and supplies. You will also be setting up the sleeping quarters for anyone who wants to stay on the ship."

Emori gave a slight nod but remained standing by Murphy's side. I can't say I know her too well, but from what I know she's good for him. She's definitely made him a better man.

Once the meeting was over everyone began clearing out of the hall. Some headed back to their quarters to sleep until it was their shift, and some headed outside to get to work. I turned towards everyone standing behind me. I grabbed Bellamy pulling him to the side. "Did you talk to her?"

He folded his arms looking over his shoulder cautiously. "No, she wants to talk tonight. She wouldn't listen when I told her she needed to rest."

I rolled my eyes catching a glimpse of Clarke sitting in a chair behind him, deep in conversation with Raven. "Raven told me she made her a wheelchair so she can work in medical bay. As much as I think she should rest, we also need her. She's one of our best." Bellamy's body tensed. He wasn't going to let this go, but a part of him knows it's true. "She'll be okay. I know Abby will make sure she doesn't overwork herself. If you want I'll check in on her myself every few hours."

He nodded at me before turning back to Clarke. Azuma grabbed my wrist pulling me to the side, catching me off guard. "I know we have a lot to do before winter, but you need to get some rest. Not sleeping won't help anyone."

I pulled my wrist out of his grasp. "I'm fine. There's too much that needs to be done right now."

He grabbed both my shoulders pushing me against a wall as I fought against his grasp. "You need to sleep. Now. I know you feel like everything is your responsibility, but it's not. That's why we're all here. To help you. Go to our room and sleep or I will take you there myself."

Bellamy grabbed Azuma's shoulder pulling him back. "What's the problem?" His voice was husky and overpowering. Definitely intimidating.

Azuma kept his eyes narrowed down at me. But his body slightly tensed at the sound of Bellamy's voice. "She hasn't slept since Clarke was taken. She needs to sleep."

Bellamy pushed past Azuma towering over me. His shoulders wide and his gaze demanding. "What the hell, O?"

"You need to sleep. We'll wake you up if we need you for anything." Azuma stood by Bellamy. Shoulder to shoulder they both corned me.

"I'll sleep tonight. But today is our first day of getting things back to normal and I have a lot to do." I pushed past both of them before they got the chance to argue. I made my way to Clarke who was deep into a conversation with her mother and Jackson. She was sitting in her makeshift wheelchair. As soon as I joined their circle their conversation died and all eyes fell on me. "Can I talk to Clarke alone?"

Jackson and Abby both nodded at one another turning towards the stairs and making their way out of the room quickly. Clarke's eyes focused on me. Her face tense and a harsh wrinkle forming above her nose. "What's the matter? Is everything okay?"

"I know you want to jump right in with everyone else by getting back to work, but you're injured." She opened her mouth to argue, but I quickly shot my hand up to stop her before she cut me off. "Abby told me that you do need to rest, but I know you well enough to know that won't happen. So, I'll be limiting your hours for now. You're teaching the apprentices the basics for now. Once Abby tells me you're cleared, then and only then will you be able to get back into helping with any of the trauma that comes in."

She let out an annoyed sigh. Closing her eyes for a few seconds. "I don't see why I need to be limited to a few hours. I have a wheelchair it's not like I'll be applying any pressure to my leg."

"No. But the hours you aren't teaching I'll need your help with a few things." Her eyes narrowed on me until Bellamy stepped beside me pulling her attention away. "We can talk about that later. I think Bellamy needs to talk to you first." Bellamy glared at me his jaw clenching. He was nervous, but he'd never been in love with anyone the way he's in love with Clarke. This is a big step so I get it, but he just needs a little push. "I'll talk to you both later." I patted his chest making sure to hit the spot where he hid the ring before making my way out of the room.

 **Clarke:**

Octavia quickly ran out of the room, not once turning back. My eyes fell to Bellamy standing in front of me, his eyes focused on Octavia. His hands were balled up into fists, but as soon as he turned to look at me he released his fists. He cleared his throat pulling my attention back up to his face.

"What do you need to talk to me about?" His face tensed, but he kept his face as expressionless as possible.

"Let's go talk in our room." I nodded and he made his way behind me pushing my wheelchair down the ramp and out into the hall.

His breathing was heavy, slightly uneven. I tilted my head back to look at him, but his eyes were focused ahead. I laid my hand on one of his hands wrapped tightly around the bars of the wheelchair. His eyes immediately moving down to mine, a soft smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Are you okay?"

He let out a slightly nervous laugh, shaking his head. His soft curls dancing across his forehead. "I'm fine." The smile on his face got bigger as he shifted his eyes back to the hallway in front of him.

He was nervous. I could tell the way he constantly tried to swallow the lump in his throat or the way his eyes barely skimmed mine or the way he ran his fingers through his hair. I felt a knot form in my stomach, maybe something was wrong. Maybe he realized he doesn't want to be with me. I don't think I can handle losing Bellamy like this. At least when I didn't know if he loved me or not I never had to deal with the thought of losing him emotionally. A pit formed in my stomach and I could feel tears well up in my eyes.

They immediately disappeared when Bellamy stopped in front of our door moving placing a kiss to the top of my head before moving to punch in the code for our room. No. He loves me. He wouldn't hurt me. He told me he would never do that to me. This has to be something else. He made his way back around my wheelchair and slowly pushed me into our room.

There were flowers placed into a small vase on the table. Colorful flowers from one of the fields nearby. They were beautiful shades of pink, orange, and yellow. These flowers were especially extraordinary if you see them at night. They glow in the dark. Besides the flowers, there were color pencils and a few notebooks.

I shot a surprised look at Bellamy. "Where did you get all this?" A large smile spreads across my face. The kind of smile that made your cheeks hurt, but you could care less because you're too happy to hide it.

His smile was almost as big as mine as he kneeled beside me. "You used to radio about how much you loved that field of flowers so I thought it'd be nice to have a few here until we can go there ourselves." I felt the tears build up, but I held them back. How could I ever think this man would hurt me? "We brought in all the supplies from the other bunkers and rummaged together a few of the things from this ship and I found a few things I knew you'd like."

I cupped his face in my hand, a tear slipping down my cheek as I smiled at him. His hand slowly caressed my face, wiping away the stray tear. "Thank you." It's all I could say right now.

He leaned in gently pressing a kiss to my cheek before lifting me out of my chair. I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck pulling him in for a kiss. It started off chaste, but it deepened as he sat me down on the bed. Sometimes it was easier to show him how I felt rather than tell him.

I let out a sad moan when he pulled away, running his hands through his hair once more. His breathing heavier and even more uneven than before. He let out a heavy sigh patting his heart as he brought his attention back to me. He made his way to the end of the bed taking a seat on the edge near my feet. I couldn't help but feel a little sad. Why was he being so distant?

"What's wrong?" My voice sounded weak but eager.

He wrapped his hand around my ankle. The warmth of his palm sending shocks up my body. "Nothing's wrong. I just want to talk." His voice was low and deep.

"Talk about what?" My voice was almost at a whisper, barely loud enough for him to hear.

He gave me ankle a soft squeeze. His thumb circling soft circles on my skin. "About us."

I felt goosebumps cover my body. I pulled my ankle from his hand pulling both my legs into my chest as I sat up. "Bellamy." My voice cracked as my voice echoed in the room.

He moved closer grabbing my legs again pulling them into his lap. He began to gently massage around my thighs carefully running his fingers around my wounded leg. I could feel the heat from his palms through my pants. "It's not bad. I promise. I just need you to listen to me, okay?"

I nodded at him incapable of speaking with him rubbing my legs. His eyes too distracting to put any sentence together in my head. I let my eyes fall back to his hands running softly up and down my thighs. "We've been through a lot together, Clarke. We've fought long and hard together. For our people, for the people, we love, for each other."

My eyes slowly made their way back up to his. His face was soft but still nervous. Small beads of sweat building up on his forehead. The soft dark curls slowly sticking down to his forehead. I leaned up and wiped part of his sweat off his forehead with the pad of my thumb, giving him a weak smile. He closed his eyes letting out another heavy breath. "I love you. That's no secret. You know it. I know it. Everyone knows it."

He grabbed my hand giving it a soft squeeze, his thumb caressing the top of my knuckles. I rested my hand on top of his. "I know we've had a complicated past and I don't doubt that it'll only get more complicated."

"Bellamy." I squeezed his hand. "You're rambling."

He let out a heavy laugh shaking his head again. "I don't want you to feel like I'm rushing things. At least I don't think I am. I mean I waited 6 years to even tell you I love you so this could be me rushing things."

I gave his hand another squeeze letting out a soft laugh at his nervousness. He pulled his hand out of mine opening a small zipper on the inside of his jacket. His hand was clenched into a tight fist. He wrapped his other hand around his fist, closing his eyes once more. "Look, I don't want us to change. I want to be with you. Today, tomorrow, every day. Forever. I know life on Earth is crazy, but that's why I don't want to waste any more time."

His eyes were focused down on his fist. I cupped his cheek in my hand again bringing his soft almond eyes up to meet mine. "Bellamy. I love you. I always will. Life on Earth will always be hard and complicated, but as long as we get through it _together_ it won't matter. Right?" He started smiling, a wide Bellamy Blake smile. The kind that never failed to take my breath away. I leaned in pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "Nothing and no one will change us. It may have taken us this long to figure it out, but I love you and I always have."

His eyes fell back to his fist. "Together." He inhaled deeply once more before making eye contact again. "Abby gave this to me. She told me to use it whenever I'm ready, but honestly, I think I want you to wear it when _you're_ ready." He opened the palm of his hand revealing my mom's diamond ring. The ring my dad once gave to her. The ring she wore around her neck religiously. Tears streamed down my face as my fingers hovered above it. Bellamy's face tensed as he shifted closer. Setting the ring down in my lap as his hands moved up to cup my cheeks. The pads of his thumbs wiping away my tears. "Clarke." His voice was low and weak.

I cupped his face in my hands and kissed him. Hot tears streaming down my face as we pulled away. "You don't have to wear it until you're ready. Or you don't have to wear it at all. I just want you to know that I'm serious. It's you and it'll always be you. A ring won't change that."

I picked up the ring slowly running my fingers along it. "How did you…"

"Your mom gave me the ring because she said we needed to stop waiting for the right time because the right time may never come." He took the ring from my hands. He picked up my legs slipping out from underneath them. He slowly got down on one knee. He rested his elbow on his knee holding the ring up. "The right time may never come and who knows maybe I'll die tomorrow while hunting."

I threw my legs over the edge of the bed dangling them in front of him. Leaning down I smacked him in the chest. He let out a little laugh. "I'll be your wife, but there are a few conditions." He looked up at me in complete confusion. "Well, I don't want a big old fashion wedding. I think we should have a night where we serve Monty's moonshine to everyone and casually announce that we're married." A smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth, the corners of his mouth creasing perfectly around his mouth. "I'll wear the ring, but you have to wear one too. If everyone's going to know I'm married to a hothead named Bellamy Blake I think it's only fair that your past conquests know you're also married to the commander of death. The mighty Wanheda will have the head of anyone who gets in her way."

He shifted closer to me kneeling between my legs. The palm of his hand placed on the tip of my knee. "You're not Wanheda anymore. You're going to be Mrs. Bellamy Blake. And everyone's going to know about it. Even if we don't have a wedding."

"I have one more condition." The smile on his face softened as he stared up at me. He stayed on his knees in front of me. "Madi is mine too. So, if you want to be with me you're going to have to want Madi too. She's my family."

He grinned widely at me. "Madi already knows. I told her when you were talking to everyone in the hall. She was more excited than I was." He leaned closer to me, resting his hand on my knee again. "I love Madi. I've loved her since I knew she was taking care of you while I was gone. She knows that." I grabbed his face pulling him off his knees and towards me. He kissed my head softly hovering above me as I laid back onto the bed. "But she says she still wants her own room."

I rolled my eyes. "But she's going to take the room next door and we're going to have the code to the room so we can check in on her. If she's going to sleep alone there has to be rules."

He buried his face into the crook of my neck. I held him there for a few minutes, his arms tightened around me like he was too scared to ever let me go. His warm breath was running down my neck sending a wave of heat throughout my body. His fingers running through my hair. I could feel him smile as he placed soft kisses up my neck. Once he reached the soft spot behind my ear he stopped. "We can talk about it later, Mrs. Blake," he whispered in my ear. Goosebumps covered my body. The heat from his breath was sending shocks down my body.

He pulled himself away, holding the ring up. He grabbed my hand pulling me back up so I was sitting in front of him. His knee resting between my legs. I placed my hand in his as he delicately slid the ring onto my finger. His fingers running around it, and his eyes focused on my hand.

I grabbed his arm pulling him back on top of me. Immediately wrapping my hand around the back of his neck so I could kiss him. I kissed along his jawline, I kissed the small dimple on his chin and continued on stopping around his ear. "Whatever the hell you want, Mr. Blake." He let out a heavy groan before pressing my back against the bed harder.

The kiss was hot and needy. It was full of passion and desire. Like this was all we needed. Once I began to run my down his chest and to his waist, there was a knock at the door. We both let out a loud huff of frustration. Bellamy got back to his feet turning to the door, but before he could get away I grabbed his hand pulling him back for a kiss. He smiled as he turned towards the door. I leaned up on my elbows waiting for someone to storm through.

He opened the door and leaned against the frame of the door. "Abby. What can I do for you?"

"Hello, Bellamy. Octavia told me that Clarke is supposed to come down to teach in medical bay. She didn't come so I got worried. And no one has seen her." I could almost see the concern on my mother's face. Her nostrils were probably softly flaring. Her cheeks pulled in tightly, she always subconsciously bit on the insides of her cheeks when she was worried. A soft little wrinkle has probably formed between her eyebrows.

"I'll bring her up there myself. Don't worry." I rolled my eyes at the sound of Bellamy's voice. Bellamy had a few different tones. The tone he uses when he's mad or trying to seem strong or superior. That's usually the tone he used to talk to everyone else. There was his softer tone of voice, he usually used that when he was talking to children or sympathizing with someone. There was the tone he used with me or Octavia, which is usually genuine. Then there's a specific tone he uses with my mother. It's soft, but strong his way of getting her respect. Clearly, it works though.

I'm pulled from my thoughts when Bellamy closes the door, leaning his back into the door letting out a deep breath. His head shot up as he quickly made his way back to me. His lips meeting mine. "I'm sorry. We're going to have to finish this later." He kissed me again trailing kisses down my throat and along my collarbone. "Apparently our people need us."

I grabbed his face giving him one deep kiss. His hands gripped the sheets tightly on both sides of me. He released once I pulled away, a sad look on his face. "We will definitely finish this later." I pressed a few kisses along his jawline and down his neck before pulling away again. "Don't tell anyone yet. We should tell them together at lunch."

He stood up stretching his arms up above his head. Revealing his hips and the base of his abs. A small happy trail disappearing into his pants. I fell back onto the bed covering my face with my hands and letting out a loud groan.

I felt Bellamy's hands grab me and set me down in the wheelchair. I uncovered my face to see him checking over the front of my wheelchair once more. His eyes focused on all the nuts and bolts. He placed a soft kiss to my temple as he stood up to move behind me.

It doesn't feel like anything has changed at all. We're still us. A ring won't change that and neither will me being Bellamy's wife. He's all I want and he's right, there may never be a right moment for all of this. But it doesn't need to be over the top or extravagant like it was on the Ark. As long as he knows and I know that we love each other that's all that matters. I'm still Clarke and he's still Bellamy. The only difference now is that he's not just my best friend he's my stubborn, hothead husband. And it feels good to know that he's all mine.


	27. Chapter 27

**Challenges**

 **Alexandra:**

"The meeting is over Alexandra." Nathan leaned against the frame of the doorway to my prison. His arms folded across his chest. I propped myself up on my elbows making eye contact with his deep brown eyes. "You're not cleared to work officially as a doctor, but Octavia said you should still see if there's any inventory work you can help Abby with."

I jumped up out of bed immediately making my way towards him. "Let's get started for our first day then." I pressed the tips of my fingers against his chest pushing him back. His lips curled into a smirk as he stepped back into the hall. I wrapped my hand around his wrist pulling him down the hall. He slowly followed me, pulling his wrist from the palm of my hand.

Once we made our way into the medical bay there was a loud echo of different conversations filling the air. To the left, there was a patient receiving stitches from Clarke, surrounded by a group of people observing her techniques. To the right, there were people rummaging through equipment.

A man made his way towards Nathan placing a soft kiss on his cheek. He wrapped his arm around his waist, turning to look at me. "Welcome, Alexandra. I'm Dr. Jackson. You can work with me and the rest of our apprentices until you're cleared to work on your own." His voice was soft and friendly. His smile was wide.

He stretched his arm out to shake my hand. I shook his hand. "Nice to meet you, Dr. Jackson. I appreciate the kind hospitality. Where can I start?"

I followed him to a large table in the corner of the room. It was surrounded by people all laughing and deep in conversation. Each to their own, separating and organizing different equipment into different bins. Jackson cleared his throat gaining everyone's attention. "Everyone this is Alexandra. She is one of us now." His tone was harsher now, strong. "Mel is in charge. She'll tell you what to do." He turned on his heels making his way back to the drawers.

A short brunette made her way from the other end of the table, taking a seat beside me. "I'm Mel. So, we're just rummaging through all the materials in these bins." She gestured to some large bins around the room. "All medications go in the blue bins. Any surgical equipment goes into the red bins. Bandages and wraps should be placed in the clear bins."

She made her way back to the table looking through the sorted bins. Nathan stood behind me carefully observing me as I worked through the materials. My eyes occasionally locking onto his.

I also watched Clarke from across the room. I watched her as she wheeled around the room, checking each patient. The way she taught her techniques to the apprentices. The way she held herself. The way she talked to people. She was graceful with everything she did. I can't help but envy her.

"How's the work coming along down here?" I turned to see the beautiful tan Raven leaning against the table beside me.

I shifted in my stool as I stared back up at her. "It's better than staying locked up in my cell." She let out a low chuckle, the vibration from her chest immediately sending a chill through my body. I cleared my throat shifting my eyes back to the task at hand. "How about you?"

She turned around taking a seat closer to me on a stool beside me. "It could be better." Her hands were folded on the table in front of us as she leaned forward. "How do you feel about being a part of Wonkru?"

I shifted my eyes back to her. Her eyes were focused on her fingers fiddling in front of her. "Your people are very accepting. I feel more at home with all of you than I ever did with my own people."

She placed a hand on my shoulder as she stood up. "I'm glad. You're a good person Alexandra." Giving my shoulder a soft squeeze she stepped back. "I just came here to check up on you. I'll see you at lunch, okay?" I nodded watching her as she turned around making her way out of the room.

"So, what's going on between you and Reyes?" Nathan stood across the metal table in front of me. His hands resting on the table, an eyebrow raised with curiosity.

"Nothing. She's just been a kind to me." I rested my elbows on the table staring up at him. "What makes you think anything is going on?"

"She came in here to check up on you. Kind of seems out of character for her." He stood back up, running his fingers along the stubble on the tip of his chin. His eyes were narrowed down at me. "I think it's time for a break. We can go take a walk outside."

"Outside? I thought I wasn't allowed to go outside?" He began to rub the stubble on his face again as he stared down at me. His eyes focused on mine.

"I radioed Penn. He's going to meet us down there. I think it'll be nice to get some fresh air." He gestured towards the door. "After you."

As I stood up Clarke rolled her wheelchair towards Nathan. "I hear you two are going outside. Can I join you?" She looked me up and down, one of her eyebrows raised

"Not without me, Princess." A deep husky voice echoed from the doorway. Everyone turned to see Bellamy leaning his broad shoulders against the door frame. A soft smirk tugging at his lips, a small dimple forming at the corner of his mouth. He shook his head, the soft dark curls bouncing around his forehead.

"Shouldn't you be working?" Clarke rolled her eyes at him leaning to one side of her wheelchair. Her voice wasn't harsh, it was almost teasing. It got a smooth laugh out of Bellamy.

He slowly walked towards her leaning down, placing both hands on the handles on either side of her, entrapping her between his muscular arms. His face was inches from hers. He leaned over to her ear whispering faintly so only she could hear it. A rosy tint rose on her soft, round cheeks as he stood back up.

It was clear they had a special connection. You could see it in the way they looked at each other. Bellamy's eyes tore away from Clarke's, his eyes eventually falling onto mine. His smile softened as he looked me up and down. "Alexandra."

"Bellamy." I gave him a slight nod and a weak smile. Clarke's eyes were boring holes into the side of my face, but I avoided making eye contact with her. It was clear how protective Clarke is of Bellamy. I knew it since the day I first saw her when she took me down in the middle of the chaotic hallway. The look on her face when I talked about Bellamy.

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. His face hardened back into its natural state. His nostrils faintly flaring, his jaw clenching tightly, eyes narrowed down at me, and his arms folded in front of his chest. He turned his head towards Nathan. Nathan immediately gained a strict composure. Shoulders wide, chin held high with his face hardened, inhaling a deep breath. Bellamy tilted his head towards the door. "You and Penn taking her outside?" His voice was firm, full of confidence.

Nathan remained calm, his attention completely focused on Bellamy. "Yes. She hasn't been out there since they've all landed. I think she deserves it." Bellamy's eyebrows wrinkled as he scanned Nathan up and down, taking in his appearance. Clarke's eyes shifted back and forth from Bellamy to Nathan.

Bellamy cleared his throat. "Well, then let's get going. I need to get back to work." He stepped up behind Clarke's wheelchair, slowly pushing her through the crowd of apprentices. Greeting people as they made it through.

Nathan placed his hand on the small of my back guiding me through the room behind Bellamy, moving ahead when Bellamy and Clarke stop to talk to Abby. Once we made it out in the hallway he dropped his hand moving a safe distance away from me. The walk to the ship door was quiet.

When we made it to the door we were accompanied by Penn. He stood tall by the ship door. A cold, detached look on his face once he looked at me. He was nothing like Nathan. Nathan was kind and caring. He actually cared about how I was feeling or what I wanted to do. I haven't had much of a chance to get to know any of my other guards yet, but so far Nathan was my favorite guard. He was more of a friend if I was being honest. At least I hope we'd be friends.

"Are you ready?" Nathan placed a hand on my shoulder, a large smile on his face. His free hand was hovering over the button to open the ship. Penn stood behind him, rolling his eyes.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I weakly smiled at him. He turned towards the panel on the wall softly pressing the button to open the ship door.

A loud creek echoed in the hallway. Strong beams of light making their way into the ship. A sweet smell burst through the doors along with the light, taking over all my sensations. The light from outside burned my retinas triggering my nerves to pulse. I slowly blinked trying to catch a grip of myself. The sound of chaos filled my ears. Swords clashing against one another, loud thumps from people working, indistinct conversation, and a series of animal noises in the distance.

Once my eyes adjusted to the bright shining sun I slowly stepped forward taking in the beauty of the trees, the grass, the flowers, the sky. The trees were an evergreen shade, no pictures I'd ever seen could do this any justice. The bark various shades of brown. The grass was a lighter tone. I reached down to touch it. The grass was so soft and moist nothing like anything I'd ever felt before. It was flexible, fragile even. All my senses are running wild. The sounds, the sights, the smells they were all overpowering. Completely impossible to ignore.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Clarke was at the end of the ramp, an amused smile on her face. She inhaled deeply looking around at all the people working and training.

I stood up, brushing the dirt off of my knee. "It's extraordinary." I gaped at my surroundings watching as people trained completely ignoring their surroundings. "How could you ever get over all of this? It's breathtaking."

Clarke's eyes shot back to mine. "You don't." She pushed herself off the ramp making her way towards me. Nathan and Penn slowly standing a safe distance behind her. "But as beautiful as it is, it's also dangerous. It's an endless fight on the ground. A fight for food, for survival."

"The most beautiful things can be the most dangerous." Bellamy stepped off the ramp, his eyes clinging to Clarke. Clarke sat there, completely unfazed. Almost challenging him with the look she was giving him.

"Are we still talking about the Earth?" I raised my eyebrow at him. His eyes met mine, a wrinkle forming between his eyebrows. Clarke's eyes were still focused on Bellamy. But the tension was broken when someone called out for Bellamy in the distance. He silently turned walking towards the group of people working with large tree trunks, trimming the branches and smoothing the sides. "Are they building cabins? Like the old fashion cabins, they used to have before the first apocalypse?"

"Bellamy used to read all about old architecture back on the Ark. He says they're a good place to start for building back our society." Octavia walked down the ramp. The sound of her sharpening her knife overpowering everything else as she stepped closer to me. "What do you know about cabins?"

"I used to study old architecture too, among other things. Reading up on my history is my favorite thing to do when I have any downtime. I could tell you anything you want to know." Octavia raised an eyebrow as she stared back and forth between Clarke and I. "I can draw you all out a blueprint of what the cabins should look like. I mean it's not like I'm allowed to help with patients right now, I'd like to be of some use to you."

Octavia continued to sharpen her knife, observing the knife from different angles. She was lost in her thoughts. "I guess that would be fine." Her eyes remained on the knife in her hand, her fingers running along the smooth curves of it. She lifted the knife up to eye level, her finger resting on the tip of the knife. "But don't get any ideas. There's a long list of people who want cabins." Her voice was cold.

"I understand." She drew her eyes back to her knife, hiding it away in the belt around her waist. "Nathan, can we go back inside?"

"I told you, you can call me Miller." He looked slightly uneasy but regained his composure immediately. "I got it from here, Penn." Penn quietly nodded turning back towards the guards in training.

These people were all so serious, cold. They don't trust easily, which is understandable considering I'm a stranger but that's no reason to be so detached. It was clear they were most comfortable with one another though. I've noticed that Clarke is most comfortable around her people, all of them looked up to her. They all needed each other, they all relied on each other. Clarke was the brains of all of the major decisions. Octavia was intimidating, a good voice for their group. Bellamy was strong, fearless a great source for any physical work. Raven was the brains of any technical problems, she was intelligent beyond her years. They all balanced one another out. The kind of leadership that I wish we would have had growing up.

 **Madi:**

"Madi, where do you think you're going?" Bellamy called out from behind me while I wandered around outside. His voice was intimidating but filled with concern. I turned to face him, my arms folded in front of me. Watching over everyone. The guards in the midst of intense training, the hunters practicing different techniques, the construction workers all working through an assembly line. It was odd to have so many people together, it'll take some time to get used to.

"Just going for a walk." He cocked a brow up as he watched me. "I don't start my training until after lunch. I wanted to watch until then."

His lips curled into a smile, his head tilting to one side. "Come on. You can help me." He stretched out his hand towards me, quickly allowing me to place mine in his. He pulled me along with him walking towards the assembly line of people working with large trees. "These people are shaping the wood so that we can stack them according to how we need them." He gestured towards some people using various types of knives and swords to cut into the wood, smoothing some parts of it while squaring off other parts. "Those people are skimming the trees. Getting rid of all the branches and leaves so it's easier to shape the wood." There were people working on freshly cut trees. "And those people are working on cutting down the trees." There were a few different groups of people around several trees. Each of them working on cutting the trees down.

"What's your job supposed to be? I'm pretty sure it's not to be standing around talking to me." Bellamy softly chuckled, his arm automatically wrapping around my shoulders pulling me into his chest. The smell of sweat and pine seeping through his clothes. I wrapped my arm around his waist giving him a tighter squeeze, a small groan slipping from his mouth.

"He should be teaching those bums how to cut a tree down properly." Murphy was standing behind us, a smug smile on his face. His hair slightly falling into his face.

I like Murphy, he's different. Clarke always told me that he was smug and sarcastic most of the time, but there's also a part of him that he doesn't really show. A softer side and kinder side. She told me about the times he had helped her when he didn't need to, the times he had understood her when no one else did. She always said he was the annoying little brother she never actually had.

"Come on Madi. I'll teach you too. If you're good enough you can teach the next group of grown men who don't know how to cut down a tree." Bellamy and Murphy burst into laughter. Both of their heads thrown back, Murphy rested his hand on Bellamy's shoulder his hand placed on his chest as he caught his breath. Once they both calmed down Bellamy patted my shoulder softly nodding his head in the direction of the tree line.

"Actually, there's a fight going on for who gets Madi. Don't think you'll win so easily big brother." Octavia walked towards us. Her short black hair is tied back into an intricate braid, the same way she braided my hair this morning. She placed her hands on her hips, her eyes focused on Bellamy. "Clarke and Abby want her in medical. You and Murphy want her out here with you. Azuma wants to hunt with her. Raven wants to teach her everything there is about mechanics. And I want her to be my sparring partner."

"How about we let Madi decide who she wants to spend her time with?" Bellamy stood a little stronger, a little taller. Completely challenging Octavia with his eyes narrowed down at her. A smirk on Murphy's face as he enjoyed the Blake standoff. If there was one thing that Clarke taught me, it's never to get between two Blake's when they're at a stalemate.

"Can I do it all?" Bellamy and Octavia broke eye contact, their eyes full of surprise. Murphy crossed his arms, even more, amused than before. I could feel an awkward smile growing on my face. "I don't know what I want to do. You all have something you're good at, but I don't know what I'm good at yet. I spent the past few years learning how to do a little bit of everything. Just enough to survive. But it's different now. Clarke always taught me things according to how you all would do it. Now I want to learn it all from you."

Both of their expressions softened. Octavia cupped my cheek in the palm of her hand, a soft smile on her face. The kind of smile that was subtle, one quick enough that no one would ever see. The key to a good leadership was always to instill a slight fear in your people. Something Octavia was good at.

Her thumb softly ran across my cheek. "Where do you want to start?" Her hand dropped back down to her side.

"I'm scheduled for guard training later today. Until then I want to work with Bellamy." Murphy's face slightly fell with disappointment. "And Murphy." His face immediately lit back up.

Octavia's brows furrowed and her face tensed as she stared at me. "Guard training? What idiot assigned you for training?" The tension in her voice earned her a few scared glances from the people working around us. "If you're good enough to spar with me, I'd love to see you go up against whichever fool thinks you need to be trained."

"Major Costa thinks I'm too young and inexperienced to join the guard without the proper training." Bellamy and Murphy let out heavy laughter. Completely mocking the idea. Octavia's nostrils flared with anger. Her fists white from how tight she had clenched them.

She turned towards the training guards led by Major Costa. "Major." She was furious, her voice was venomous. He quickly ran over standing in front of her. He stood there with his shoulders spread wide but he completely avoided eye contact. "Do you think I am weak?"

His eyes shot up to meet hers. His eyes filled with fear. Hers burning with anger. "No commander. Of course not." His voice was shaky, beads of sweat slipped down his face.

"Then what makes you think that Madi needs further training." Her eyes narrowed down at him. There should be holes in his face from how hard she's looking at him. "She knows how to fight hand to hand combat better than most of the guard. She can work with a gun better than any of you. She puts up a good fight while sparring with Indra or Bellamy or Echo or even me. So, what makes you think she's unequipped to be a member of the guard?" Major Costa remained silent his head hanging low, staring down at his feet. His breathing became heavy. Bellamy and Murphy leaned back their arms folded tightly in front of them, two large smirks on both of their faces. Clearly amused to watch Major Costa falter under the watch of Octavia. "How about this? You try to spar against Madi. If she takes you down then she doesn't have to go through any training, but if you take her down then she'll work according to her schedule."

Major Costa's eyes shot up to meet mine. Concern on his face. "But she's…she's just a young girl." His voice cracked again, clearly nervous. I couldn't help but smile at the sound of his voice. He was scared.

"I'm not asking you to kill her. You just need to be able to take her down." There was amusement in her voice, the way her lips curled into a devious smile. "Indra, Kane get your trainees. Major Costa has challenged Madi to a sparring match. I think all the trainees should learn something from this."

Kane and Indra got all the trainees to form a large circle in the middle of camp. Some of the people from construction came and joined in to see what the commotion was about. Indistinct conversations all around. Bellamy, Octavia, Kane, Indra, and Echo all surrounded me. Each spitting out their own advice. Don't give away your next move, don't show any signs of weakness, defending myself is just as important as attacking.

Clarke and I sparred a lot during our free time. It was kind of how we stayed sane. When Octavia got out she taught me some of her moves. I am completely prepared for this. Major Costa may be stronger and more experienced, but I am smaller, more agile, quicker. Bellamy grabbed both of my shoulders pulling me from my thoughts. A large smile on his face. "You've kicked Echo's ass more times than I ever have." Echo laughed from over his shoulder. It's true, I can do this.

Just as I was about to take the sword from Murphy I heard Clarke yell my name from behind. I turned around to see her sitting in her wheelchair, Bellamy hovering behind her. Her arms crossed in front of her chest. She was giving me the angry mom look that always managed to make my stomach knot up, making me feel nauseous. I dropped my head walking towards her. She quickly grabs both of my hands, a large smile on her face. "You're about to kick Major Costa's ass and you didn't think to call me here to watch?" I could feel my stomach automatically unknot as she pulled me into an embrace. She gently rubbed my back. "He's one of the most irritating guards we have. Always acting like he's better than us because he's older than us. Or that he knows better." She rolled her eyes, earning a few laughs from the rest of the delinquents standing around us. Miller, Murphy, Octavia, Bellamy, Harper, and Monty. "That's my girl. Go get him."

I turned back towards Murphy who had his arms stretched out with a long sword. Octavia gave me hers, it was sharpened to perfection. I grabbed the sword from Murphy tightly holding it on the side of me. Major Costa stood on the other side with a sword of his own. His face covered in fear.

I inhaled deeply pacing around the circle not breaking eye contact with him. The sound of the crowd cheering was overpowered by the beating of my own heart. My heart was beating faster and faster. Major Costa ran at me, his knife held out in front of him, full speed barreling towards me. I dodged his sword and stuck my foot out taking him down immediately. When he fell his sword fell a safe distance from him. The crowd was wild people had formed sides. Some cheering for Major Costa, but most cheering for me. It was exhilarating.

I stood back allowing Major Costa to stand up and grab his weapon. Once he was back up and ready I attacked. I faked going to the left, but once he was too far gone I attacked at his right. I cut at his right shoulder, receiving a loud groan of pain in return. I could hear Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia all cheering loudly.

Major Costa quickly jumped to retaliate aiming for my stomach, but I deflected his move immediately kicking my foot straight into his guts. He flew back in response. We circled around one another waiting for the other to make a move. When he didn't I moved forward, sliding on my knees underneath his sword when he swung it at me I ran my knife across the back of his calf. Sending him straight to his knees. Once he was on his knees I jumped up behind him holding my knife to his neck.

The crowd was wild. People were chanting my name. Major Costa and I both completely out of breath. I dropped the sword on the floor moving in front of him, holding out my hand. But he only slapped it. He stood up on his own huffing and anger across his face. "Let's see how good you are at hand to hand combat." He swung at me, I immediately dodged it swinging my fist into his face.

There was a shock across the camp. Everyone became completely silent. Major Costa twisted around his neck as I backed up slightly giving him some space to prepare for another round. Once he was ready he came at me again. He swung his foot into my stomach knocking the air out of my lungs. But I didn't let that hold me back. Once he swung his hand at me I quickly grabbed it turning my back towards him, swinging his body over my shoulder. He let out a loud grunt of pain when his body hit the floor.

I placed my foot on his chest, slightly pressing my weight into him. My heel digging into his chest. He grabbed my foot taking me down immediately then suddenly he was on top of me punching my face. I kicked my feet into his groin, using my legs to flip him over me. I sat on top of him punching at his face. I didn't realize he was unconscious until Bellamy ripped me off of his lifeless body.

"Madi. It's over. You won." He carried me towards Clarke and Octavia. I looked over his shoulder to see the crowd dispersing, shocked looks all over their faces. Major Costa was being carried into the ship by a few guards. Bellamy pulled me closer to his chest, placing a kiss on the top of my head.

He set me down once we reached our group. Clarke, Octavia, Azuma, Murphy, Raven, Emori, Miller, Harper, Monty, and Echo all stood together. Once Bellamy set me down they all reached out to hug me. I was being pulled from every direction completely confused. Once they were all done I looked around at their faces. All of them smiling widely.

"You aren't mad at me?" I dropped my eyes back to the floor as they stared at me.

Clarke wrapped her hand around my wrist pulling me towards her. "Mad? Madi, I couldn't be prouder than I am right now." I looked into her eyes, they were filled with unshed tears. She quickly blinked them away. "I think you've earned the title as the most badass warrior on Earth."

Everyone started laughing at the thought. "I don't know. Now there's you, me, Octavia, Raven, Harper, Emori, Echo too many of us to fight to be the most badass."

I could feel a hand on my shoulder. I didn't have to look to know it was Bellamy's large, warm hands. I leaned into his arm, it felt nice to have more than just Clarke here for me. "I think it's safe to say that we have the most badass women in our lives. Right guys?" Murphy, Monty, Azuma, and Bellamy all exchanged high fives. The sound of everyone's laughter filling the air.

"Well, shows over. Time to get back to work." Octavia turned on her heels heading back towards Indra and Kane. Echo followed closely behind her.

Everyone else slowly dispersed from the circle leaving Bellamy, Clarke, and I all alone. "Can we talk?" Clarke looked up at me, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. Bellamy's hand on her shoulder.

I nodded as I took a knee in front of her. Bellamy took a knee beside me. Clarke placed her hand in the palm of mine. A large ring shining under the light of the sun. I couldn't contain the wild smile on my face at the sight of it. "We wanted to tell you before we told everyone else." It was like we were the only ones out here in camp. Like everyone else disappeared. "We already got you a room of your own."

I let out a nervous laugh. "So, I was wondering…" I looked down at the ring on Clarke's hand. I've always wanted to ask Clarke if it was okay to start calling her mom, but I just didn't know how. It's not that she would say no, but what if she wasn't ready for that. Clarke squeezed my fingers reassuringly, my eyes moving up to meet hers. "I was wondering if we could be a family. Like an actual family. I know we already are like family, but I want it to be real. I know we're not blood, but…"

I was cut off when Clarke yanked my arm in pulling me into a tight hug. I buried my face into her shoulder as she held onto me like I was going to disintegrate in her arms. She did that a lot when it was just the two of us. She rubbed the back of my head. "Madi we don't need to be blood for me to know you're my daughter. I would go to hell and back for you. So, would anyone else at this camp. Bellamy, my mom, Octavia, Raven, Murphy, Monty, Harper, Miller, Kane, Indra, Echo, Emori, and Azuma. We are a family. We always will be."

I could feel tears slip down my cheeks and seep through the shirt. She continued to rub the back of my head, Bellamy began making circles on my back. It was amazing to have a home, to have a family, to have so many people who care about me and believe in me. But it was even better seeing Clarke so happy again. Sure, we were happy alone sometimes, but that was nothing compared to how happy she is now. That's all I've ever wanted.


	28. Chapter 28

**Bishop**

 **Clarke:**

Madi joined Murphy with cabin construction. They were working in sync. Madi trimming the smaller parts of the trees, while Murphy helped her with the big parts. Who would've known Murphy could be so good with kids. I guess he's better with kids than adults. But Madi isn't much of a kid anymore. She's a strong young woman. She's proved that time and time again. I'm so proud of the person she's become.

Bellamy and Penn came through the woods carrying in another large tree. Both of them moving with ease before setting the tree down in front of a group of people waiting to trim down the tree. Bellamy clasped his hands together stretching up towards the sky, stretching out his back. His shirt tugged up while he stretched revealing the lines of his waist, all the muscles in his stomach flexing as he stretched.

With all the physical work he'd been doing, he was going to be sore for a while. I watched him as he continued to stretch out his arms and back, his eyes wandering over everyone working around him, making sure they were doing everything right.

Looking around his eyes were narrowed, eyebrows drew together, and a crease formed perfectly on his forehead but once his eyes met mine there was a shift in his face. His face relaxed and the crease shifted from his forehead to the corners of his mouth, his eyes immediately softening. He made his way towards me moving through people with grace, his eyes never leaving mine.

Once he made his way in front of me he stood with his arms folded in front of him, all his weight leaning on his right leg, his shoulders broad. "Lending a helping hand to the people working in construction?" His tone dripping with sarcasm.

I rolled my eyes at the thought. I guess even from a wheelchair I could help trim the trees, but Bellamy would never let me anyways. I cleared my throat, my eyes locked onto his. "Can we talk?"

There was a shift in his expression, complete panic. "Are you okay?" His voice was strong but filled with fear.

I shifted in my wheelchair, moving my weight from one side to the other. "Yeah. I just think it's time we talk about Bishop." My voice cooler than it was before. I don't know why I'm so nervous. I tell him everything. But I also know that when I tell him all the things Bishop did he's going to want to kill him. He wanted to kill Echo for just holding a knife to my throat, I can't imagine what he'd do to Bishop for doing much more.

He took a knee in front of me, his warms calloused hand placed on my knee. His thumb rubbing my skin through the rip in my pants. "You don't owe me anything, Clarke. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." His voice was soft enough so only I could hear him.

I placed my hand on top of his, gently giving it a squeeze. "I know I don't have to, but I want to. I know we're executing him today and that should make me feel better, but it doesn't." He shut his eyes, his brows knitted. I began making circles into his forearm. He let out a deep sigh before his eyes opened up to meet mine again. " _I need you._ " His grip on my knee tightened.

He shifted slightly closer to me. "Let me finish up here and we can go somewhere a little more private."

A scoff came from the side, the sound of footsteps making their way towards us. We broke eye contact to see Raven walking towards us. "I know you two just got together, but already avoiding your responsibilities to go hook up?" She stood beside us, her hands carefully placed on her hips and a large smirk on her face. Her eyes boring into Bellamy's face. She was taunting him.

Bellamy quickly stood up. Mimicking her stance, challenging her. "Watch it, Reyes." Now his eyes were narrowed and his tone was threatening. A typical Raven and Bellamy standoff.

Raven let out a mocking laugh. "Fight me, Blake." Her weight shifted back to her right leg as she shifted to look at me. The mocking smile was now gone. "Clarke, Octavia says she needs your help with something."

Before I could respond Bellamy cut in. His hands curled into tight fists. "Well, tell her it can wait. This is important." I grabbed Bellamy's wrist immediately calming him, but his eyes were still set on Raven.

Raven scrunched up her face, slightly taken back. But she regained her strength once again challenging Bellamy's stature. "You tell her yourself. I'm not taking the heat for you."

It was like watching two children fight. They stood there staring at one another before Bellamy broke the silence. "Fine. I'll radio her."

Bellamy reached down to the radio hanging off his waistband, but before he could Penn called out for him. "Bellamy. Little help here." He was helping Murphy carry a large tree, but the two of them clearly struggling.

I pat the back of Bellamy's leg, pushing him to go help immediately. "I'm going to go meet Octavia. I won't be long. Go help him." He nodded before running over to help them all out.

I began to push myself towards the ship following Raven who was slowly limping in front of me. She was radioing Monty up in engineering, talking him through something. I didn't pay her much attention.

Bellamy's my best friend and not being able to talk to him about everything that happened is hard. Now he wants to be my husband and I can't help but feel like it's not fair if I don't tell him. But this is different.

I made my way into Octavia's office. She was pacing back and forth her fingers running along a knife she gripped onto tightly. I cleared my throat, pulling her out of her thoughts. She pushed her knife into her boot and made her way towards me. Sitting at the edge of the table in front of me.

She shifted in front of me, her waist leaning against the edge of the table and her hands gently placed in her lap. "What did you need?"

She looked down at me, releasing a deep breath. "I need you to help me with some interrogations." She shifted on the edge of the table. "Even if we're going to kill them we should get as much information out of them first."

She stood up, turning towards the table. She grabbed a stack of papers from the other side of the table. "So, does that mean we're not executing Bishop today?" Her expression dulled as she stared down at the papers in her hand.

She walked back over, gently placing them in my lap. "No. We are. But Bishop can't be all the brains on this prisoner ship."

I picked up the papers. There were pictures of each of the prisoners, their names, professional backgrounds, medical background, and family history. "You're right. I'll help, I just need to talk to..."

Octavia ripped my left hand away from the paper. Pulling it up to her face. Her eyes glowing with excitement. "Oh my god. He did it. Didn't he? And you said yes." A large smile grew on her face. The excitement clear in her voice. Her eyes were on the ring on my hand. She gave my hand a gentle squeeze. "When's the wedding? I mean I'm going to assume in the spring so we can spend the winter prepping. And who really gets married in the winter. We can establish a new tradition for weddings. What do you..."

She was talking so fast I couldn't even process what she was saying. Immediately I cut her off. "Octavia."

"What?" She glanced at me, her forehead puckered.

I placed my hand on top of hers. I know she wants us to get married, have a big wedding, a big party, and be happy but I know that Bellamy doesn't want a wedding. He's not the wedding type. At least he's never shown that he's interested in a wedding. "We decided we're not going to have a wedding. We're just going to announce that we're married at dinner." Her face fell, completely taken over by her emotions. "I don't think me and Bellamy are going to make it to lunch."

She let out a soft laugh. Folding her arms in front of her. "I know you two are married now, but already skipping out on time with us to hook up?"

I joined in her laughter, running my hand through my hair. "We're _not_ hooking up." She stared at me, slightly confused. I swallowed the large lump in my throat. "I'm going to talk to him about Bishop."

Her eyes fell to the floor, guilt all over her face. Her hand fell from mine. "Oh. I'm so sorry Clarke."

I grabbed her hand giving it a tight squeeze. "It's okay. I just think it's something he needs to know."

She stood up, pulling her hand from mine. "That's good. I'm glad." I smiled up at her. I know what she's feeling the guilt of not making the right decision, of feeling like all the pain is caused by you. Octavia had to make some of the most difficult decisions, in the bunker and now on the ground, but she's been a strong leader. I know she has what it takes to get over this. Her face shifted and her eyes lit back up. There was almost a teasing look on her face. "But seriously, not having a wedding? The first wedding after the second apocalypse! You can't be serious?"

I nodded my head, rolling my eyes. "We're pretty serious."

I want a wedding, but that's just not us. We're not normal, nothing about us has ever been normal. A part of me wants to have a wedding, show to everyone that no one has ever or could ever mean as much to me as Bellamy. I want him to feel special. I want him to know he's different from anyone else I've ever been with, but I don't want to push him. I don't want him to feel like we have to have a wedding. He'd do it for me if I asked. Just to make me happy.

Octavia slammed a fist into the table. Her nostrils flared, her eyes burning into my face. "I won't let that happen. As the commander, Bellamy's sister, and your new sister-in-law I refuse to let you two not have a wedding." Her voice was echoing in the room with anger. Octavia wasn't going to let this go. I took in a deep breath. This was a fight for Bellamy, not me. "Besides we've all been betting on you two for years and it's only fair that we get to celebrate you two finally taking your heads out of your asses and getting together."

I was taken back by her comment. Slightly heated I yelled back. **"You bet on us?"** I mean a part of me always hoped that Bellamy and I would get together too, but we were always too scared to lose the friendship we had. I had no idea that everyone around camp was gossiping about us getting together.

Octavia held her hands up in defeat. Stepping away from the table towards the other side of the room. "Don't get mad at me, it was Jasper who started it." Her face fell once she mentioned Jasper. "He would've been so happy to see you two together now. He started the bet when we first landed."

I let out a laugh. It made a lot more sense now. "Once when Jasper was high he told me that Bellamy and I were great parents."

Octavia burst into laughter. Real laughter, the kind where you couldn't stop smiling and the corners of your eyes wrinkle from smiling too much. Once she gained control of herself she took a deep breath, reminiscing from the days when it was just us delinquents. "Jasper bet that you two were secretly hooking up without anyone knowing and that all the fighting was just sexual tension building up."

The laughter continued. I convinced myself that I hated Bellamy when we first landed, but clearly, I couldn't convince anyone else of that. Octavia continued. "Monty said you two were too focused on us to hook up." Monty was partially right, we did work together to save our family but we also didn't want to destroy any chance at a reliable friendship. Having each other's support was more important to us.

"Miller bet you two had already hooked up, but it didn't work out. Harper bet that Bellamy was in love with you, but you didn't feel the way." She stood there deep in thought. Probably thinking back to the day that they all made these bets.

She brought herself back to reality, setting her eyes back on me. "Eventually, when Raven came down she bet that you two were both in love but wouldn't admit it until one of you almost died." We almost died way too many times to tell, but I guess 6 years away from each other is what we needed. Close enough to death I assume. "Murphy bet you two would never stop being idiots."

"Jasper always dropped hints, but I had no idea he started a whole pool of betting on us?" The laughter between us only grew at the thought of Jasper. He always knew how to lighten the mood even in the worst of times. I brought my attention back to Octavia. Everyone else bet on us, but there was no way she didn't join in. "What did you think?"

Her mouth twisted as she considered what the right thing was to say. She began pacing back and forth. "At first I thought my brother was an idiot who wouldn't ever fall in love." She rolled her eyes at the thought, still walking back and forth deep in thought. Bellamy sleeping with every girl at the camp. I used to hate it so much, I still hate the idea of him with anyone else but the past is the past.

Suddenly she stopped, slowly turning towards me. "Until I saw the way he looked at you or the way he would act around you. He listened to you. You broke through to him in a way that I never could. You made him a better person, Clarke." Her voice was soft, completely different from how she was around anyone else. Right now, she isn't the commander of Wonkru or a ruthless warrior, she's Bellamy's baby sister. She's someone who cares. "When I saw you two hug after escaping from Mount Weather I knew you were both in love, that it wasn't one-sided. I knew everything would fall into place when the time was right for you both when you both really got the chance to realize how you felt about each other."

There was a silence for a little bit. The kind of silence that was comforting. No matter how much we'd all been through, how much we'd done to each other we are a family. We care about each other. Eventually, I broke our silence. "What did you even bet?"

She leaned against the wall on the other side of the room, her head was pressed against the wall as she looked up at the ceiling, biting back the smile on her face. She dropped her head back, staring at me. "It was different for everyone. If Jasper won we'd all have to bow down to him every time we saw him for a month. If Monty won he wanted everyone's rations of peanuts and for someone to give up one of their bigger tents. Miller and Harper wanted everyone to take turns taking his guard shifts for three months. Raven wanted a wrench monkeys to boss around. Murphy well he wanted everyone's rations, a bigger tent, and some slaves."

Octavia shifted her eyes back to the floor. "What about you? Seems like you're the winner. So, what did you win?"

She raised her eyebrows, a small dimple forming at the corner of her mouth as she smirked. "You'll find out soon enough." She pushed herself off the wall, starting to pace again.

I tilted my head to the side, staring at her. "Should I be concerned?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she continued pacing. "Possibly."

The crack of the radio broke our conversation. Our eyes shooting to the radio sitting in the middle of the table. "Clarke. Where are you?" Bellamy's voice echoed in the room.

Octavia rolled her eyes, quickly picking up the radio. "She's with me Bell."

"Octavia." Bellamy's voice sounded agitated, but that was nothing new for the Blake siblings. It was their way of showing each other love.

"I'll bring her down with some food for lunch. Just take her somewhere nice." My eyes shot up to Octavia's face, but she turned her back towards me.

The sound of Bellamy laughing across the radio eased a headache that was growing from all the stress I'd been feeling lately. "Already one step ahead of you O. Bring her down, I already got food."

Octavia turned back towards me, clipping the radio to her waist. She made her way back towards me sitting on the table in front of me. "Sounds like you're going on a date."

I scoffed. "Is that even a thing down here?" Sure, other people went out to spend time alone and be romantic but not us. We never had the time or the opportunity to.

"When I was with Lincoln we used to sneak away to the butterfly forest. Sometimes we'd go sit by the river. I'd call that a date." Her eyes were glistening with tears, but she quickly blinked them away. Lincoln was everything to her ever since we landed when he died a part of her died with him. But after these past few years, Azuma has brought some of that part back. Azuma isn't intimidated by her strength, he admires it. He embraces her ruthless side but keeps her from crossing the line. He allows her to be herself, he doesn't expect her to change.

"What did you do?" She stood there crossing her arms in front of me, completely amused by the stupidity of my question.

I'd been in relationships with Finn, Lexa, and Niylah, each of them more different than the other. When I was with Finn he made me fall in love with him, made me feel special, made me vulnerable in a way I never really allowed myself to be again. He broke my heart, made me feel guilty for things he did. We snuck around, going on trips to the art supply store and on trips for food or water, but it could hardly be a date. Most of the time Wells was with us, or Bellamy.

When I was with Lexa everything we did involved war, alliances, treaties. I loved her, but at the end of the day, her being in command and her people would always come first. She didn't love me the way I loved her.

My relationship with Niylah was more physical than emotional. It was a nice change from all the heartbreak, but it wasn't enough. She gave me some stability, some good advice, but my heart was never truly in it.

Octavia made her way around me, grabbing the handles of my wheelchair, pushing me towards the door. "Eat, sit, talk. I don't know it was refreshing. Especially when there were a million terrible things going on around us. It was our way of bringing ourselves out of all the pain and misery."

"Lincoln would be so proud of you O." She slightly paused as we made our way down the hall, but caught herself continuing on.

Clearing her throat, she whispered, "I know." Her voice was low, almost groggy.

Octavia placed her hand on my shoulder. I covered her hand with mine throwing my head back. "I'm sure he'd be happy that you're happy too. Azuma is amazing."

She half smiled at my effort to make her feel better. "He is. Azuma understands me."

We turned the corner towards the ship's main door. I squeezed her hand dropping it back down into my lap. "He's lucky to have you."

Octavia took her hand off my shoulder, pushing a little faster as we made our way outside. "And Bellamy's lucky to have you."

"I am." Bellamy's deep voice peering from behind us. I turned to see him walking down the hall with a large backpack thrown over his shoulder. "Thanks, O." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders placing a kiss to her temple.

Octavia rolled her eyes, immediately shrugging him off her shoulders. "Be back within the hour. I still need you later." She nudged my shoulder before quickly making her way outside, immediately jumping back into her role as commander. Giving orders, teaching techniques, putting people in their place.

Bellamy placed a kiss on the top of my head as he began pushing us outside. He quickly began weaving us through the crowd of people making their way towards the ship for lunch. Exchanging greetings with people as we passed them by. Once we got through the crowd I leaned my head back, catching a glimpse of the half smile on Bellamy's face, his curls dancing across his forehead.

I took the backpack from him, wrapping my arms tightly around it as it sat in my lap. He lead us towards the river. We continued down the path in a relaxing silence, taking in the beauty of the trees and the riverbank running along the tree line.

We reached a small waterfall, where the river ran into a large lake. I pulled out our food as Bellamy filled up some bottles with water. He took a seat on a rock beside me, his eyes darting up to meet mine.

Bellamy started a fire, heating up some meat. "You know Octavia wants us to have a wedding."

His lashes fluttered and his eyes widened. "What?" He was taken back but was more confused than anything. "Do you want a wedding?" His voice was low but almost scared. His eyes shifted back to the fire. The flames from the fire mixed with the sun brought out the honey parts of his chestnut eyes.

"Do you?" I leaned forward onto my elbows extending my hands out to catch some of the heat from the fire. The sun may be out, but the winter breeze was colder than ever.

A deep chuckle vibrated through his chest. He looked back up at me, the flames mirrored in his eyes. "I mean we'd be pretty historical. The first wedding after Praimfaya. I wouldn't mind." Speaking with complete caution. Was he afraid that I didn't want a wedding?

"But do you want to have a wedding?" I tried to be clear, but I can't pull myself away from the idea that he thinks that I don't want a wedding.

"Do you?" There was an undertone of fear, his eyes running across all the features of my face.

I shrugged my shoulders trying to ease some of his tension. "I wouldn't mind. I mean either way I get to be your wife, right?"

"Of course." His face hardened and there was a blankness to his eyes. He fell into deep thought.

I reached out grabbing a stick of meat from him, our eyes locked on one another. Tearing a piece of meat off I popped it into my mouth. "Do you want a wedding?"

"I want to have a honeymoon." He started laughing, holding his side from the pain. The sun ringing down on him, his skin falling back into the soft olive tone, and his toffee brown freckles scattered perfectly across his face like the stars in the sky.

I leaned forward hitting him in the chest. "Bellamy!"

His laughter was uncontrollable, completely carefree. He looked younger, more innocent than ever. He took a few deep breaths coming back to reality. "I think we should have a wedding and a honeymoon." Tilting his head to the side he gazed down at me. "I think we deserve it. Besides getting away for everyone for a day or two wouldn't be so bad."

"Winter is coming so we won't get that until after winter passes." His face hardened as the reality of everything hit him. There was a lot of responsibility resting on our shoulders. Even if we weren't leaders anymore we still had important duties among our people and that was a stress of its own. I grabbed his shoulder slightly rubbing into his muscles. I could feel them relaxing under my grip.

He leaned his head into my hand on his shoulder, rolling out his neck. Leaning forward he continued stretching out his back. "After our wedding?" He ripped a piece of meat off his stick stuffing it into his mouth.

"So, you do want a wedding?" I bit down on my lip trying to hold back the laughter when Bellamy nearly choked on his food but it was impossible.

He fidgeted with the water bottle taking large sips to wash down the food. "It'd be historical." He hesitated, nervously laughing while taking another bite out of some bread. "You know I like my history." He shrugged his shoulders.

I rolled my eyes at him, my mouth curving into a smile. "You're a romantic and you know it."

"Whatever you say, Princess." He reached out grabbing my hand, the pad of his thumb running along my knuckles. His face fell, but his eyes remained focused on me. "So...Bishop."

I pulled my hand out of his, folding my arms in front of me. "I want the kill. I know he's done a lot to you too, but I just..."

"I know." He shifted closer leaning against my shins, his legs folded underneath him. "I can't even think about what he's done to you. He deserves to suffer for what he did to you. For what he did to us."

"Is that why you couldn't sleep the first few nights after I came back?" His hands formed into two tight fists, his knuckles white. His nostrils began to flare and his breathing became heavy. I ran my fingers through his hair, pulling his attention back to me. "I just...I couldn't stop thinking about what he could have done to you, what he had done to you." His eyes glistened with tears. He inhaled deeply regaining his confidence. "I visited him once."

I leaned back into my chair. He ducked his head down, his eyes closed. "Why?"

"I wanted to give him what he deserved." He stood up, turning to face the waterfall. I stood up making my way towards him slowly.

"Bellamy." I placed my hand on his shoulder pulling his attention back to me.

"You shouldn't be walking Clarke." He turned around scooping me into his arms. Gently placing me down on a rock beside him. He held my leg in his hands running his hands around the wound on my thigh. A single tear slipped down his cheek. I reached out running my fingers along his cheeks. "I'm sorry. I should've told you. I just couldn't. I knew if it was something you couldn't tell me that it had to be bad. And the thought just drove me crazy."

I shifted closer pulling his head into the crook of my neck. His tears ran down the base of my neck and to my collarbone. "It's okay." I ran my fingers through his hair, scraping the base of his scalp.

He pulled away, his head hanging low. The tears glistening on his cheeks. "No, it's not. I can't control myself when it comes to you." His voice was low and broken. He turned his face away from me.

I cupped his cheek in the palm of my hand running my thumb along the corner of his mouth. "I'm not going anywhere." I pulled him back into my arms, he immediately buried his face into my shoulder. "What did you do to him?"

He pulled his face out of mine, his hand running through his hair. His brows drew together as he glanced down at me, his eyes pooled with fear. He grabbed my hand, pulling it into his lap. "I just wanted to know why. Why keep us as prisoners? Why send us out only to attack us again?"

He paused inhaling deeply. I tightened my grasp on his hand. His eyes met mine. "He heard your radio entries every day. I wasn't the only one listening. He knew you were down here. He knew that they'd stand no chance against you and Madi. That's why they took us. That's why we were prisoners. They needed leverage."

I released his hand, taken back. They were taken because of me. I'm the cause of all of this. They could've all died because of me. I pressed my palms against the rock trying to get up, but Bellamy grabbed my wrist pulling me back down. His hand running along my thigh again.

He squeezed my knee, now resting in his lap. "Don't." His eyes were narrowed and his voice was demanding. "This isn't your fault Clarke. You couldn't have possibly known." Bellamy always knew what I was thinking without me having to say anything. Once I relaxed my face he continued. "They sent us out because they wanted to see where you lived. Where you kept your weapons. Whether the Earth was survivable again. They were testing us."

I blinked away some of the tears forming in my eyes. He tilted his head to one side waiting for me to say something but I couldn't. This was too much to process. I did this to them. I did this to everyone. "They chose to be aggressive. They underestimated us. They underestimated you." He pulled my hand back into his lap. Both of his hands wrapped around mine. "Then I asked him why he took you."

His eyes were burning with anger. His jaw clenched tightly while he stared down at my hand gently wrapped up in his hands. "What did he say?" He took one hand raking it through his hair. "Bellamy."

"You're strong. You're smart. You're courageous. You're beautiful." His voice was cold. I started to run circles into his shoulder, easing some of the anger built up in his eyes. "He wanted you. He told me..." There was a crack, he tried to clear the lump in his throat. "He told me that even if he died there would always be a piece of him in you."

He tore his hands from mine, quickly jumping up to face the line of trees behind us. I sat and watched him. His breathing growing heavy, he shoved his fists into his pockets, occasionally pulling his hand out to rub his face or run his hand through his hair.

Bishop was taunting Bellamy. He wanted to get to him and he did. I limped towards Bellamy. I made my way in front of him standing in front of him with all my weight shifted to my good leg. I didn't make eye contact. I could feel his eyes boring into me. An occasional sniffle from his runny nose.

I took his fists out of his pockets. Holding both hands in front of me. They were covered in bruises. Bruised hands were normal for Bellamy, he did work a lot, but these bruises were different. They were deeper shades of purple and blue. I skimmed my fingers gently across each bruise. He winced at the pain.

"I can't control myself when it comes to you, Clarke. I just couldn't..." I looked up to him, the whites of his eyes surrounded by a sea of red. "You don't have to tell me what he did to you."

I pulled him in tightly burying my face into the crook of his neck. The tears running down my cheeks. He pulled me up to him so there was no weight on my leg. I held him tightly. "I don't just want to tell you, Bellamy. I _need_ to tell you." He pulled my legs up into his arms and carried me back to the side of our dying fire. "If you don't want to know then I won't." I sat with my legs extended in his lap. His eyes were focused on the fire, but his hands were gently massaging my legs.

He stopped rubbing my legs. His eyes ran over my body, taking in every bump and bruise. "What did he do to you?" His voice was acidic. He let out a harsh breath focusing on my face.

I tried to swing my legs around, but he tightened his grip on them. I rested my hand on his. "He whipped me, beat me, cut me, shocked me." I felt his grip slightly loosen, his eyes flickering with anger. "He tried a lot of things, but he didn't. He couldn't." I yanked his arm towards me pulling his attention to me. "He couldn't because of you. He underestimated you. Underestimated how far you'd go to get me back."

"You were already out by the time I got there. You didn't need me. He underestimated you, not me." His voice was filled with disappointment. But he shouldn't be disappointed. Had I waited for him, he would've saved me.

"I'm one of the most badass warriors on Earth, remember Bellamy? I'm not a damsel in distress, but I will _always_ need you." He half smiled at my half joke. But there was still anger in his eyes. "Bishop did try to come onto me. But we don't need to go through the details."

"Tell me." Bellamy's eyes were burning with rage, but he wanted to know.

"He kissed me. He ripped off my clothes. He touched me." Bellamy's eyes became a deeper shade of brown. Darkness overtook his face. I curled my fingers around his wrist trying to pull him out of his thoughts. "But he didn't do anything else. He couldn't."

Bellamy slammed his fist into a rock, the blood pouring down his knuckles. Before I could grab his fist, he pulled away. "I'm going to kill him with my bare hands." He stood up quickly putting out the fire and beginning to pack everything up.

I stood up, but I couldn't move further. He had every right to hate Bishop, to want to kill him, to want to make him suffer. But this isn't him. "Bellamy."

My voice was almost a whisper. I wasn't even sure he heard me, but then he stopped moving around. He turned around quickly grabbing me and putting me back into my wheelchair. "No. I know you want the kill, but I can't." He turned back towards the rest of our stuff, refilling the bottles with water. "He made you suffer." He paused before turning back to put everything back into his backpack. "I'll make him regret ever laying a finger on you."

He gently placed the backpack in my lap. "I'm sorry." I wrapped my arms around the backpack, laying my head on top of it.

He kneeled in front of me. "This is his fault and I'll make him pay, but I don't want you to be sorry for anything. This isn't on you Princess." He rested his hand on my knee. This was my fault. If I hadn't radioed anyone then none of this would have happened. But Bellamy was right, he deserves to suffer for what he did. For taking them from the Ark as prisoners. For trying to kidnap my daughter. For torturing me, Bellamy, and Octavia. For trying to take over our ship.

Bellamy stood up in front of me turning towards the back of my wheelchair. I threw my head back looking up at the vast blue sky, touched up with soft pink clouds. "Thank you."

"For what?" He began pushing us back towards the camp. If it hadn't been for Bellamy I wouldn't be here. He's saved my life more times than I could remember. But he was also the source of my sanity. Even when he wasn't here he kept me sane.

I continued to stare up at the sky, the sun beaming down on my face, the tips of the trees brushing up against the clouds. I exhaled deeply, a slight smile growing on my face. "For always being my person."

"Your person?" I didn't have to look at him to know he probably looked confused. The soft wrinkle forming between his eyebrows. His lips curled in tightly.

I tightened my grip on the backpack in my lap. "At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. Once we choose that person we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them. The person that is still with you at the end of the day, that's who's worth keeping." Bellamy was that person. The person I always want around, the person I go to for everything, the person I need the most. "Bellamy, I don't have to say a word to you, you can just look at me and see who I am, how I feel, or what I'm thinking. You accept me, you don't try to change me. And it's been like that since we've first met. You've always been my person."

We continued down the path quietly. A calming silence. "You're my person too. You have been for a long time." He let out a lighthearted laugh.

Our silence continued on for a few minutes. That's the thing I love most about being with Bellamy, we never felt awkward with each other. Everything about our relationship was comforting. "You know the delinquents bet on us?"

He let out a deep chuckle, the vibration coming from his chest was soothing. He looked down at me, a tight smile on his face. "I know. Jasper told me."

My head whipped towards him. **"You knew?"**

His smile shifted into a condescending smirk. "He was the only one who I actually told that I was in love with you. He was very persistent that we get together." His smirk fell at the memory of Jasper. He may have hated us, but he was still family. If we had another choice we wouldn't have hurt him the way we did. I wish we hadn't. Bellamy's eyes focused back on the path ahead of us. "I miss him."

I turned back forward leaning into the side of the wheelchair. "I do too."

He swallowed the large lump growing in his throat. "On the Ark Monty would come to my room to tell me stories about Jasper and just cry. At first, he wanted to hate him for leaving him. Then, he cried because he felt like it was all his fault. Eventually, he accepted it. Once a week, every week he came to my room to talk about him. I knew what he felt more than anyone else so we confided in each other." I could feel my heart drop down into my stomach. We'd been so busy I hadn't had a chance to talk to Monty about everything that had gone on. None of us really had the time. We had gotten so caught up in surviving we hadn't gotten the chance to really live. "After a year of crying, he finally began to accept what happened to Jasper. That's when he started laughing at all the things they used to do."

I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes. "If anyone's to blame for what happened to Jasper, it's me. It was my fault."

Bellamy rubbed my shoulder lightly, the warmth of his hand sending a chill throughout my body. "But Clarke he didn't regret it. He wanted it. He was right. Anyone can survive, but not everyone can live. He lived. He was happy. He didn't want to spend 5 years trying to survive in a bunker, especially after living a life on Earth. It's what he wanted."

He was right. Jasper had lived a better life than any of us. He had fun, something none of us had ever gotten the chance to do. "Now's our time to live. We need to live for everyone who couldn't."

We have lost too many people that we love. It's time to start appreciating what we have. "We need to live for us, no one else. I think we owe ourselves that much." His voice was soft. I felt his thumb rub circles into the back of my neck around the base of my hairline. "So, about dinner?"

"I guess instead of a wedding announcement it can be an engagement announcement." He let out a large sigh of relief. His breath hitting my neck, sending a shock of goosebumps throughout my body. "I'm sure Octavia has already told everyone." The sound of Bellamy's laughter echoed throughout the forest.

It was nice to be here, together. To finally talk everything through. To finally get everything together. To finally be happy. The shadow of our past will always haunt us, but we were better for it. The darkness we've faced has made us better.


	29. Chapter 29

**Expect the Unexpected**

 **Bellamy:**

We made our way back into camp. Everyone was back at work, but I kept walking towards the ship doors. Clarke turned towards me, her icy blue eyes seeing right through me. "I can handle myself from here. You should get back to work." Her lips curled into a soft smile. The kind of smile that had me winded.

I tried to keep my breathing even as I stared down at her, her soft golden waves blowing around her face from the cold winter breeze. I pushed on of the strands of hair behind her ear, my hands lingering around the base of her ear. She immediately closed her eyes releasing a deep breath. "Are you sure?" My voice was needier than I had intended it to be, but at this point, it doesn't really matter. Clarke knows I need her.

She placed her hand on mine, still lingering around her neck. She tilted her head to the side, holding my hand in place. "Bellamy."

I ran my thumb along the line of her jaw. Goosebumps growing beneath my fingers. I leaned down whispering in her ear, "Radio me if you need anything." Her body twitched. I loved having this kind of power, to make her weak with the slightest of gestures. I placed a kiss to her temple before pulling away. She looked back at me, her pupils blown, brows creased, and a few wrinkles around the corners of her mouth.

I watched her as she slowly pushed herself up the ramp, turning to look at me once more before disappearing into the ship. Once she was gone I made my way back towards the construction workers. I know Clarke wants everything to be better and that she wants us to be back to normal, but I can't get the image of Bishop touching her out of my head. All I could think of was gutting him and watching the life leave his eyes.

I quickly shook away my thoughts when I saw Madi sitting at the end of a tree, her emerald eyes narrowed down at the large branch in her hand. She was working efficiently quickly tearing off the useless pieces of the tree and throwing them into a pile behind her. She looks just like Clarke when she's focused on helping someone. A soft wrinkle forming between her eyebrows, her tongue slightly sticking out to help her focus, and occasionally biting down on her bottom lip when she's close to getting where she wants to be.

I walked towards her placing my hand on hers. Her eyes darted up to meet mine. At first, there was an anger in her eyes, just like when you get between Clarke and her work but once she realized it was me she smiled widely. I smiled back down at her. "Have you eaten lunch?"

She rolled her eyes, waving my hand off hers, and focusing back onto the task at hand. "Yes, I have."

I leaned down on the large tree sitting between us. Placing both hands on either side of her. "What'd you eat?"

Without looking up she began to mumble a quick response, "I ate some deer. And before you ask, I had lunch with Octavia, Emori, Harper, and Abby."

I rubbed the palm of my hand through her hair, slightly messing up her hair. She groaned in response, but her focus stayed on carefully cutting off the extra branches. "Good girl. Now tell me what you've learned."

She cut off a branch quickly tossing it to the side. Her eyes were filled with excitement. "I learned how to trim the trees. How to shape them."

She was cut off by Murphy who walked up behind her. Placing his hand carefully on her shoulder, giving her a small squeeze. "And she showed these big boys how to cut down a tree." He placed his other hand on his hip, letting out a loud laugh. He looked over his shoulder to look at a group of men working on cutting down a tree.

I folded my arms in front of me. A large smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "That's my girl."

Madi smiled up at me and then quickly stood up. "I've got to go. Murphy wants me to teach the new people how to cut the trees." She hurried off towards the tree line, waving over some of the new men. They all looked confused, but they followed her and immediately took her directions to start cutting down the tree.

Murphy sat down where Madi had been sitting, picking up her knife and continuing to trim the tree. "I know she's not your daughter by blood, but from the looks of it she might as well be." There wasn't any sarcasm in his tone, he was being genuine. We spent the past few years together on the Ark and even though Murphy had been one of my best friends, sarcastic comments were just a part of Murphy you learned to love. He had his moments though, where he made you question whether or not he really was a sarcastic asshole or if it was just an act.

I let out a lighthearted chuckle. "Get back to work. We can't have Madi doing all the work." I turned towards a group struggling to cut down a tree.

As I was getting close I heard a voice call out from behind me. "Bellamy. I could use your help, please." I turned around to see Glass standing inches away from me, a smirk tugging tightly on her face. Glass was from my station on the Ark and one of the first few conquests when the delinquents landed on Earth.

I awkwardly stepped back into a safe proximity. "Sure." She turned around and walked slowly towards a tree that needed to be shaped.

She placed her hand on my bicep tugging me closer to her. "Can you teach me how to shape it again?" Her voice was raw but girlish.

I pulled away from her once her hands started to wander. Rolling my eyes, I started to teach her how to shape the tree, again. "You need to make all your cuts even, otherwise it'll make it hard to put them together later." I kept my eyes focused on the tree. Slowly cutting into the tree so she could see how it should look like. But I could feel her eyes running up and down my body. Once her arm landed around my waist I pulled away, standing a safe distance from her. "Look. Glass. I'd stay away from me if I were you."

Her brows furrowed and she stuck out her bottom lip, slowly moving closer. "But I can't." She ran her index finger down my chest. "It's just been too long."

I grabbed her hand, throwing it back at her. Her jaw dropped at my reaction. "Look if you want to live I'd stay away from me. Clarke will kill you. Hell, Octavia will kill you too." Her jaw dropped even more than it had before, she folded her arms in front of her. "Now, if we're done here I've got better things to be doing."

I walked away before she could say anything else. She stood there in complete shock. I couldn't hold back my laugh while I walked towards the tree line. I felt a hand clasp around my shoulder and the echo of laughter by my side. I turned to see Miller walking by my side. "I must say that was the funniest thing I've seen today."

I rolled my eyes stopping to turn towards him. "I'm glad I could entertain you."

Miller continued to laugh at my expense. "I've never seen Bellamy Blake ever look so scared to have a girl come onto him." He continued laughing, placing his hand on my shoulder to support himself.

"I wasn't scared of her, I was scared for her." I joined in on the laughter. "You know Clarke said she'd go complete Wanheda on anyone who gets in her way."

Miller took a few deep breaths, regaining himself. "I don't doubt it. I guess we need to make a few announcements and break some hearts before Clarke unleashes Wanheda. Or even worse Octavia forms an alliance with Wanheda." He continued laughing patting my shoulder before leaving. Octavia and Clarke were intimidating individually, but together they'd be unstoppable.

My radio's crack brought my attention back to reality. "Bellamy." I quickly grabbed the radio to respond, but then Clarke's voice came across the radio again. Her voice was slightly broken, but she tried to cover it up by clearing her throat. "Bellamy. We need you up here in the prisoner deck."

I quickly started running towards the ship doors, weaving through the trainees, workers, and hunters. I felt an arm pull me back. Azuma. "Bellamy, what's wrong?"

"I don't know something's wrong up on the prisoner deck." Azuma's eyes narrowed. He assigned someone to take over with hunting training and then we both ran towards the ship door. Running down the hallway.

We burst through the doors of the prison deck to find Clarke sitting in her wheelchair, her knees pulled into her chest and her face tense. I walked towards Clarke taking a knee in front of her. I placed my hand on her knee, rubbing soft circles in the hole of her pants. Easing some of the tension from her face.

Octavia walked out of a cell at the end of the hall, Azuma quickly made his way by her side. "It's time." Octavia stood behind Clarke, squeezing her shoulder.

Clarke nodded, straightening out her legs. She leaned forward, her hand wrapping around my jaw. "You can have to kill." Her thumb rubbed my cheek.

I took her hand off my face, holding it between both my hands. "He'll suffer for what he did to you. I promise." She briefly closed her eyes, taking in a few deep breaths.

"Azuma, get another guard and take Bishop outside. Raven and Monty are getting everyone outside. Since this will be your kill, you should get your weapons ready." I stood up beside Octavia, her hand still protectively placed around Clarke's shoulder to soothe her. Octavia leaned towards me, whispering in my ear, "Make him suffer Bell."

I patted her shoulder before leaving towards the armory to get some weapons. If I'm going to make him suffer I'm going to need all the weapons I can get. While in the armory I picked up a few of Octavia's sharpened knives, tucking them away into my pants. I refilled the bullets in my shotgun and I grabbed a stun stick before leaving.

When I walked out Bishop was tied against two large pillars, his arms and legs stretched out on both sides of him. He had a sinister smirk on his face once his eyes met mine. Octavia stood beside him on a small platform. Once she realized I was there she began to talk to the large group standing in front of her.

"Let this be a message to everyone. Wonkru is not to be tested." The crowd began cheering. We had lost six warriors when we raided the ship and Wonkru was eager for revenge. "Jus drein jus daun." [Blood must have blood.] The crowd mimicked her words, cheers flying around the crowd.

I made my way towards Bishop, weaving in and out of the crowd. People were patting my shoulders with excitement. Slowly the crowd died down. Octavia gave my shoulder whispering in my ear, "Ste yuj." [Stay strong.] She made her way to the front of the crowd. Standing beside Clarke, her arm clutched tightly around Madi's shoulder.

Azuma pulled the gag off of Bishop's mouth. He immediately began whipping his body around trying to free himself from the restraints. "If you people are so strong then why kill me like this?" The crowd went silent. Bishop stopped moving. "If you all are so strong I challenge you. Our strongest warrior against your strongest warrior." Murmurs filled the air as everyone took in his challenge. He started to laugh hysterically. Causing an uproar among the crowd. "Unless you're scared you'll lose... _commander_." He drew out commander to emphasize his challenge towards Octavia's leadership. I rushed forward, my tight fist moving swiftly in a quick uppercut to his jaw.

He was thrown back by the direct hit, shaking his head to regain himself. Azuma pulled me back as Octavia quickly made her way up to Bishop. The crowd fell silent under her sharp gaze. "Oso gonplei nou ste odon." [Our fight is not over.] The cheers continued until she turned towards Bishop. "If a fight to the death is what you want then that is what you'll get."

The sound of the crowd drowned out everything else. I rushed over to Octavia pulling her arm towards me. "What the hell O? I won't let you do this."

She pulled her arm from my grip. A gentle nod in my direction. "I am the commander, Bellamy. I will not have anyone question my strength." She walked up to Bishop pulling his shirt into her fist. "Who's your best warrior?"

Bishop threw his head back with laughter. "You don't stand a chance, little girl."

Octavia released his shirt, her elbow instantly hitting his nose. Blood ran down his face, but he continued smiling. "That the best you got?" He continued laughing, but Octavia remained calm. Her face revealing nothing. "Major Rhodes."

Octavia whipped her head towards Azuma, her hair hitting Bishop in the face as she turned. "Release Major Rhodes and take Bishop back to his cell." Azuma and a few other guards quickly took her directions moving quickly down towards the ship. The crowd of people continued on with their indistinct conversations. Everyone formed a large circle, centered by Octavia who was proudly standing in the middle talking to some guards.

Octavia had become a strong fighter. No one dared to spar with her, except Madi and Azuma. I don't know what techniques these prisoners use to fight, but they couldn't possibly stand a chance against Octavia. She was Skairipa, death from above.

 **Clarke:**

Madi moved me around towards the back of the circle. Just far enough to where I could see everything without being in the way. There was tension in the air, mixed with some excitement. Raven, Murphy, Emori, Monty, Harper, Miller, and Echo all stood at the edge of the inside of the circle waving us over. Madi turned to me, eager to have a front row seat to the fight.

"You go, I'm fine here." I nudged her. She immediately ran across the circle towards everyone else. She stood with everyone else, her face glowing from excitement.

Suddenly there was a large silence as a few guards carried out Major Rhodes, his legs kicking a flailing all over the place as he tried to resist being taken to the center of the circle. The man was tall and lean. He had wide, chestnut hooded eyes. His thin, arched eyebrows were furrowed with frustration. He had a smooth, peachy complexion. His hair was short, light waves pushed back out of his face.

He was gagged so anything he said was incoherent, but he was clearly angry. They reviewed the rules of their fight once he calmed down. The crowd was cheering and yelling once Octavia pulled out her sword, Major Rhodes looked intimidated but mimicked her actions. Looking through the crowd I saw Madi standing beside Raven, her eyes carefully focused on Octavia.

I looked around the crowd of people looking for Bellamy, but he was nowhere to be found. As I was about to turn my head I felt his hands on my shoulders, leaning into his hand I closed my eyes. He was probably stressed about this fight, I placed my hand on his but once I felt the rough and hairy knuckles I knew it wasn't Bellamy. Right as I was about to turn around I felt a piece of cloth pressed against my mouth, muffling any screams that escaped my mouth. I tried to kick around, but I was whisked away by a large man carrying me carefully into the ship.

The crowd was too focused on the fight to see me. The man ran deep into the ship making his way towards the living quarters. Taking me quickly into a room beside the mess hall. Once we made it inside he threw me on the ground. A sharp pain shot through my leg when I landed on it. Immediately I looked around the room to see Bellamy up to the wall. His cries were muffled by a cloth placed in his mouth to gag him.

Around the room stood Bishop, two men, and two women. Bishop's face was covered in bruises and blood. Once his eyes met mine he revealed a large smile on his face. I tried to stand up, but I was immediately kicked down by one of the women. Her foot hitting me right on my side. I laid back winded by the hard blow.

"We meet again, beautiful." He winked at me, crouching down towards me. Bellamy began kicking and waving his arms around. His screams muffled. Bishop turned his towards Bellamy. Bellamy tilted his head to the side, hopelessness taking over his eyes. Bishop cupped my face by my jaw. "Now, now Bellamy. You wouldn't want me to do anything to her that you can't handle."

As his face was still turned towards Bellamy I quickly scanned the people around the room. Taking this opportunity to attack. I threw all of my weight onto Bishop. My fists quickly meeting his face as he struggled to get me off him. I went as long as I could until I was torn off him by the two women. They held me up, my legs dangling beneath me. These women were tall, strong, and completely built. Unlike any of us. Maybe we underestimated them.

Bishop wiped away some of the blood dripping from his mouth. His smile growing wider than before. Bellamy was pushed up against the wall, now quiet. The other two men holding his shoulder back. Bishop leaned forward holding my chin between his index finger and thumb. His thumb running along the bottom of my mouth. "You know I love it when you get feisty."

I used my dangling leg to kick him in the groin, his body immediately flying forward as he fell to clutch himself. When he looked up at me I shot some spit at his face. "You wanted the commander of death? You've got her!" The women carried me back towards a chair in the corner of the room. They tied my hands and leg down to the chair, I tried to resist but they were stronger than I was.

Once Bishop regained his strength he stood up, quickly walking towards me. He took the back of his hand and slapped me the sound of his hand against my cheek echoing throughout the room. This was his plan all along. To challenge Octavia so that he could take us. "Take him down, boys. On his knees."

The other two men silently took Bellamy off the wall. Pushing him onto his knees. His hands still chained, and his feet still tied together. Bishop quickly grabbed my hand, taking in the ring on my finger. His head quickly shooting to look at Bellamy. His eyes wide, and his mouth slightly open once he figured out what he was looking at. "Mr. and Mrs. Blake, is it?" The smile on his face grew more ominous. "Now let's have some fun."

Bellamy held himself up on his knees. I could see the fear taking over his face, the powerlessness that came with being in his position. And the look on his face was ripping my insides apart. I tried to swallow the lump growing in my throat, but it was hopeless. There was no saving us anymore. We were helpless and we knew it. No one would even notice us being gone. And if they did, the last place they'd look is a random person's living quarters.


	30. Chapter 30

**Hopeless**

 **Octavia:**

I made my way to the center. Azuma and Indra both hovering around me giving different directions. Indra was sure that I was completely capable of taking this man down, but Azuma was scared. Scared that his strength would overpower mine. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Azuma's face tensed, his eyes narrowed down at me. There was darkness in his eyes, something Azuma never showed.

I stood in front of him, my eyes shifting up to meet his. "No one should question my strength." Azuma's head tilted to the side, his brows furrowed. He opened his mouth to say something but I cut him off. "If I die, I will die a good death."

Indra stood beside Azuma, her fists resting on both hips. "Now focus. He may be bigger and stronger, but you are smarter and quicker. Let him attack. When he loses he shows a sign of weakness, then you must attack." Indra held out a sheath with my knife carefully placed inside. The crowd began chanting my name. "Your people believe in you."

Major Rhodes stands on the other end of the circle, his hand gripped tightly around a smaller sword provided to him. I whip my sword out of its sheath, the clash of the sword against its cover echoing over the crowd. I held the sword close to my chest, my fingers running along the edges of the blade, sharpened to perfection.

Indra made her way to the center standing between Rhodes and me, her hands interlocked behind her back. "These prisoners dare question the strength of our commander." The crowd fell silent. "Today they will see the strength of our people. Commander, do you accept this challenge to fight to the death?" I tightened my grip on my sword, nodding in response.

Indra moved out of the way the beat of the drums overpowering the cheers of the crowd. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest. I calmly stood at the end of the circle watching Rhodes as he stood across from me. His chest aggressively rising and falling, his eyes wide, and his knuckles white from the tight grip on his sword.

I began slowly pacing waiting for him to make a move. After a few minutes, he ran at me with full rage. His sword held straight ahead of him. I countered his attack, stopping his sword with mine. My leg swinging up immediately to kick him in the gut. His torso hurled forward, his head hanging low. Once his head swung forward I swung my knee up to hit his face. Blood splattering all over his face from his nose.

His eyes shot up, filled with rage. He charged forward, swinging his sword at my head. I leaned back immediately the edge of his blade inches away from my face, almost skimming the tip of my nose. I stood back up swinging my sword towards his stomach the tip of my sword skimming his skin. The blood seeping through his shirt.

He lunged forward, uppercutting me straight in the jaw. I was thrown back. Immediately he kicked me in the stomach, knocking me straight on my back. Once he threw me to the ground I swung my legs back over my head, jumping back up to my feet. He swung his sword quickly deflecting his. We quickly fell into sync, our swords constantly clashing against one another.

I swung up for his head, he quickly ducked swinging his sword at my leg. The cut from his sword burned, but I quickly retaliated swinging my sword at his chest. He grabbed the tip of the sword, his blood pouring out of his hand. He swung his sword at my hand, dropping my sword I stepped back dodging his blow.

The crowd became silent. Rhodes rushed forward with his sword aimed straight at my chest, I dodged him jumping up to wrap my arms around his head. Cradling his head between my arms I pulled him to the ground, my back hitting the rocky Earth floor. His sword fell a safe distance from him, leaving both of us weaponless.

Once we were both on the ground there was a fight for power. He laid some punches to me, but I countered his attacks. Using my legs to flip him over. Jumping up we both stood across from one another, our breathing heavy and uneven. As he was about to charge I stormed forward slide tackling him to the ground, his face hitting the floor hard.

My fists flowed into a constant motion. His blood splattering over my face. His arms held tightly between my legs. After a few blows, he found the energy to flip us over. Quickly moving off me to get a grip of himself. As soon as I stood up he kicked me in the stomach knocking me on my back. The back of my head aggressively hitting the floor. My heart began beating so fast I could feel my vision blurring. Rhodes hovered above me, his heavy breathing snapped my attention back to the fight. He took his sword, throwing it up but I immediately rolled over swinging my legs beneath him.

He let out a loud grunt as he hit the ground. I quickly jumped up holding the end of my sword to his neck. As I swung my arms up to finish him he rolled around, my blade landing only inches away from his face. He kicked me back, immediately jumping on top of me. His legs were straddled on both sides of my waist, his fists taking turns punching me in the face. I could feel the life leaving my body, but I couldn't let this go.

I used all the strength I had left to flip him over. I jumped up, my legs threatening to give way underneath me. My sword was too far for me to get it so once he stood up I lunged forward putting out a stiff left, followed by a right cross. The blood continued dripping from his face, but that wasn't going to hold him back. He took a few steps forward slowly circling me trying to anticipate my next move.

Once he reached a safe enough distance I spun my leg underneath him. As he hit the floor I ran over to my fallen sword. I heard him run towards me, but before he could get close enough I turned around throwing my sword at him. The sword landed through the left side of his stomach, he was completely impaled. His breath hitched, blood slowly pouring out of his mouth. I pulled the sword out, blood flowing out of his stomach.

I took advantage of his weakness, kicking him to the ground. The sound of the crowd was muted by the sound of the blood pounding in my ears. I slowly walked towards him rubbing his blood off my sword with the palm of my hand. He laid on the ground, gripping his side and groaning loudly. As I held out my sword I could hear the crowd chant in unison. "Yu gonplei ste odon." [Your fight is over.]

I pierced my sword through his chest. The life slowly leaving his eyes. As I watched the blood pour out of his mouth, I whispered. "Yu gonplei ste odon." Ripping the sword out of his chest I turned towards the crowd seeing everyone cheering. Madi, Azuma, Indra, Raven, Murphy, Monty, Harper, Miller, and Emori all front and center. I wiped the sweat and the blood off my face with the back of my forearm.

Slowly the crowd fell silent and everyone dispersed. Once the majority of people went back to their duties Madi ran up to me, everyone else following closely behind her. Madi's arms quickly wrapped around me. I dropped my sword, wrapping my arms around her tightly. I looked up towards everyone walking towards me, but something was missing. Everyone filed in to hug me. Abby and Jackson approached me, both eager to whisk me away to medical and fix my wounds.

I looked around me, everyone was here except for the two people who meant the most to me. "Where's Bellamy and Clarke?" Everyone began looking around, confusion peering all of their faces.

Raven shrugged her shoulders, a faint smile on her face. "I don't know. Maybe they're hooking up."

Madi stepped between us, her eyes wide with worry. "I left Clarke in the back, she was watching from behind." She fidgeted with her fingers, a crease forming on her forehead. Her eyes darting around the crowd of people slowly making their way back to their work. "They would be here."

I wrapped my arm around Madi's shoulders, giving her a reassuring squeeze. She leaned her head into my shoulder. "Let's go find them."

Abby grabbed my wrist pulling me back. "Not until you get those cuts wrapped up, if you leave them like this they'll get infected."

Madi's face fell as she stared up at Abby. "Fine. We'll find them after, okay?" She nodded, her face still tense.

Bellamy and Clarke wouldn't miss this. They would be here. Something wasn't right. I could feel it in my gut.

 **Bellamy:**

"Mr. and Mrs. Blake, is it?" He smiled in a way that made my heart clench. He leaned down, pulling Clarke's hand up to his lips. "Now let's have some fun." Clarke squeezed her eyes shut once he touched her. I pulled against my restraints. The only thing I want to do is rip Bishop's face off. I can feel my muscles tense and my blood boil.

Bishop's eyes darted over to me. He slowly stood up, releasing Clarke's hand. Her eyes burst open, tears building up in her eyes as she stared at me. Bishop began filing through the drawers. My eyes stayed focus on Clarke. The pain in her eyes began ripping my insides apart. I continued to pull against the restraints. If I pull hard enough I can break free and gut Bishop like the pig he is.

Bishop walked towards me bouncing a knife against his hand, crouching down in front of me. "The more you fight, the more I'll hurt her." My entire body froze, I sat back on my heels and stared up at him. I tried to catch my breath, but the thought of anything happening to Clarke because of me was too much to consider. "Good boy." He turned towards Clarke, her eyes squeezed shut as he approached her. "Look at me." She kept her eyes closed. He grabbed her face, squeezing both of her cheeks together, her lips pouting out in response to his aggressive hold on her. I could feel my jaw clench, but that's all I could do. "I said look at me." She kept her eyes shut, her body clenching under his touch. He took the knife digging it deep into her collarbone. Her eyes remained shut, but there was a flicker of pain. That flicker of pain was too much to bear. I hung my head low mimicking her. A part of me hopes that Bishop would just knock me out, at least that way I wouldn't have to watch Clarke suffer.

Bishop began laughing hysterically. "No one is going to save you. If you want to survive. You have to listen to me, beautiful." Her eyes opened, a single tear falling gently down her soft cheek. Bishop wiped her tear away with his thumb. Clarke leaned away from his touch. "Now, now. Don't cry. If we're going to do this, you might as well enjoy this."

She swallowed the lump in her throat, rebooting her confidence. She let out an angry laugh, almost insulting. "You'll have to kill me before I enjoy doing anything with you." I shook my head at her. Mocking him would get her hurt even more. She blinked, reassuring me that she knew what she was doing.

Bishop took the tip of his knife pressing it against the neck of her shirt, slowly cutting down through her clothes. "That'd just be too easy." He ran his fingers down her from the base of her neck to her chest. I felt chills go down my spine. "I'm going to make you both suffer." He wiped some blood from her collarbone with his index finger immediately licking it off with his tongue.

"What do you get out of this? They'll all kill you anyways." Clarke fought against the restraints pinning her arms down. The women behind her grabbing her shoulders immediately pulling her back. She's right. Dead or alive Bishop was going to suffer for this. I'll make sure of it myself. I can think of a million different way I'd want to kill him right now.

Bishop stood up making his way behind her chair, his eyes focused on mine. He leaned down, his hands entrapping Clarke's jaw to hold her in place. Leaning into her ear he said. "I get the satisfaction of ruining your lives." He placed a kiss behind her ear, Clarke's eyes shutting tightly. I tried to scream, but the gag only muffled my cries. "You two are important to your people. I can use you to negotiate." He placed another kiss below her ear. Clarke's hands formed tight fists, so did mine. I would do anything to rip his tongue right out of his mouth. It felt like I was being set on fire from the inside, burning through my skin and making its way out. Every inch of my body fighting to combust.

"They'd never negotiate with you." Clarke opened her eyes. They burned through me with fury. Bishop placed another kiss lower down her neck, his teeth skimming her skin. He made sure I could see everything he was doing to her. He was more concerned with seeing my reaction than anything else. This was for his own creepy satisfaction.

His eyes were focused on me, taunting me. He ran his fingers down her neck until her collarbone. "If they don't I die anyway. But why not die leaving you both with a piece of me." I could see Clarke's entire body tense, her eyes falling to the floor. He kissed her neck again, this time his lips remained locked onto her skin, clinging to her skin. Clarke let out a small groan of pain. When he released there was a red mark formed into her skin. There was a gleam in his eyes when he released like he had just marked his territory. His complete disrespect towards her made me want to rip each individual hair out of his head.

I closed my eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to slip from my eyes. I can't let him know this is affecting me. The less he knows about how this makes me feel, the less satisfaction he gets out of this. Satisfaction is the last thing I'll give him. The more I squirm the further he'll go. Seeing this happening to Clarke kills a part of me inside. To see her be assaulted like this, to be tortured like this. This wasn't about me, this was about her. Bishop wants her, he's wanted her since he came down here. My Clarke.

"Every time you close your eyes she will pay the price." My eyes shot open to see Bishop holding a knife against Clarke's stomach. A large smile on his face. If I get the chance to torture him, I'm going to make him suffer. I'm going to rip his heart right out of his chest. He dug the knife into Clarke's stomach, her blood slowly pouring out of a large gash.

He stood up in front of her, making his way towards the drawers again. "Now I wouldn't want that to get infected, now would I?" He pulled out a large bottle of alcohol. Clarke's eyes grew wide at the sight. Bishop poured the alcohol on a small cloth pressing it against Clarke's skin. She bit down on her lip to fight back the pain, but it was useless. We didn't have anesthesia down here, but people were known to pass out from the pain of disinfecting wounds if it were bad enough. But Clarke is stronger than this. She bit down the pain, swallowed it. If she was scared, there was no way of knowing.

I mumbled through the cloth in my mouth. "Please, I'll do anything. Just stop," But my words are muffled. I could feel a tear slipping down my cheek, I can't hide the pain. The pain of seeing Clarke abused like this.

Bishop's lips curl into a heinous smile. "Now remind me." He runs his fingers along Clarke's thigh. He sets down the cloth and picks up the knife lying beside him. "Wasn't this where I shot you?" He jams his knife through her thigh, right in the part of her femur that had been damaged from when he shot her. Clarke's cries sent a shock through my body. The knife remained in place.

The anger was overtaking the pain of the ropes tugging against my skin. I ripped through the ropes tying my ankles together quickly using my legs to kick Bishop in the face. My blood was boiling with so much anger I didn't even feel anything when his guards took a stun baton and rammed it against my back. My entire spine going into shock, freezing at the electricity spreading throughout my body. Falling to the floor I was tied up once again. Bishop stood up, wiping some blood from the corner of his mouth. He took the knife, still stuck in Clarke's thigh, dragging it down he thigh. Tearing through her muscles. Clarke's cries filled the room. He stood up making his way towards the closet. "Now why don't we have this traitor fix you up a little, beautiful. Can't torture you if you're dead." He opened the door, Alexandra falling out. Her arms and legs both tied, a gag around her mouth. Tears streaming down her face. "I know Dr. Traitor cares enough to heal you. Right?" Pulling off her restraints and the cloth around her mouth he pushed a medical bag into her stomach. "Fix her."

Alexandra fumbles into the floor falling to her knees at Clarke's side. Clarke's breathing becoming shallow. She cut open Clarke's pants at the thigh revealing a gushing wound. Quickly disinfecting it, Alexandra controls the bleeding stitching her up as fast as she can. Clarke is slowly becoming paler.

"Now. From what I know. Our little traitor here is in love with your husband. Right?" Bishop brings the tip of his knife to Clarke's chin, pulling her face up so she could look him in the eyes. Clarke's eyes were dull, all her energy lost in the pain. "Answer me when I'm talking to you."

Clarke looked up at Bishop through her eyelashes, a threatening look in her eyes. "Why don't you ask her?" Her voice was challenging, earning a large grin from Bishop. Alexandra sat on the floor beside Clarke, her knees pulled up to her chest.

"How about we ask Bellamy? Maybe he'll give me an answer." Clarke's eyes shot up, filled with regret. I shook my head at her, but it was too late.

"Yes. Alexandra is in love with him. Yes." Her voice cracked, her nerves getting the best of her. I kept my eyes on Clarke. Her eyes were filled with regret. It's times like this that our unspoken language really came in handy. It was easier for us to tell each other what we were feeling without anyone else knowing.

"You may have betrayed our people, but I think I can put you to good use." He wrapped a hand around Alexandra's neck pulling her off the ground. He pushed her into my chest. Her body landing heavily against mine. She immediately moved out of my arms, almost shaking from fear. "Now, let's put on a nice show for Bellamy's good wife." My entire body tensed. Alexandra hung her head low sitting back on her heels beside me, tears slipping from her eyes falling straight to the floor. This was worse than physical torture. He knows how to get under our skin, he knows how to piss us off. He thinks our love is a weakness.

"Kiss her, Bellamy." My head snapped up to look at him, a wide smile on his face. Tears falling down Clarke's face. "If you don't kiss her your dear wife here will get it." Clarke blinked away the tears. Nodding at me. She squeezed her eyes shut. I looked over to Alexandra balling on the floor beside me. "Alexandra. Kiss him. Now." Clarke knows that this means nothing, she knows I love her and that's all that matters.

Alexandra turned towards me. Her eyes were puffy and red, the veins in her eyes ready to pop. Sure she claimed to be in love with me, but she wouldn't want this to happen this way. She wasn't that kind of girl. I nodded giving her permission, she leaned forward temporarily removing the gag around my mouth, pressing her lips against mine. I looked over to see Clarke's eyes squeezed tightly, her breathing heavier than normal. Bishop turned to her, the back of his hand leaving a bright red mark on her cheek. "Open your eyes." Clarke's face falls as she watched Alexandra press her lips against mine again. We quickly pull away, Alexandra placing the cloth back into my mouth. Clarke knows this isn't what I want. She gives me a reassuring nod.

Bishop pulled Clarke's chin up with his hand placing an aggressive kiss against her lips. She squeezed her eyes shut, a tear slipping down her cheek. My hands curl into tight fists. Bishop pulled away a large smile on his face. "I'm starting to understand why she means so much to you." He ran his finger down her sternum, Clarke's body flexing under his touch. He slips a hand under her shirt. I can't control myself. I start to yell and pull against the restraints again. I can feel the blood coursing through my body, every ounce of me fighting to beat his face in. Bishop turned towards me, a harsh look on his face. He made his way behind Clarke's chair. His eyes on mine as he leaned down, his hands slipped under the part of her shirt covering her. He placed sloppy kisses down her neck.

Clarke's face turned red, matching her puffy eyes. Tears now uncontrollably streaming down her face. Bishop doesn't stop, his hands slide down her stomach reaching the base of her pants. Clarke tried to pull away, but it was useless. I felt hot tears streaming down my face. I've never felt so powerless, so useless, so weak. This was all my fault. Had I been more careful, this wouldn't have happened.

Bishop made his way back in front of Clarke, pressing a sloppy kiss to her lips. I tilt my head away. This was too much to watch. I looked over at Alexandra who was sitting down with her legs crossed, her fingers fiddling with her bottom lip. The tears stopped, but her breathing was still heavy.

Suddenly Bishop let out a loud scream, blood seeping out of his bottom lip. His blood smeared across Clarke's lips, a tight satisfied smile on her face. That's my girl. A light laugh slipped through my lips, Bishop's head snapped towards me. Anger beaming from his face.

He took the baton hitting it straight into Clarke's side. Clarke let out a loud cry. Her head dangling in front of her. She looked lifeless, her eyes shut, her mouth slightly open, her skin paler than normal. Alexandra shifted towards her, wrapping her fingers around her wrist to check her pulse. She let out a sigh of relief, easing some of my anger.

Bishop took off Clarke's restraints, pushing her to the ground. Her limp body lying in front of me. Alexandra cradled her head in her lap, tears slipping down her cheek. Bishop kicked her in the face, sending Alexandra's body towards me. She cradled her face as she moved out of the way.

Bishop made his way towards me, his face inches from mine. "Now it's time to see how much you really care about Clarke." He took his knife cutting off my shirt. Alexandra kept her eyes to the floor. Bishop took his knife out, cutting my arm. I bit down on the inside of my mouth trying to consume any pain I was feeling. He dropped his knife on the floor, slowly taking off his belt. "It's time to see how strong you really are."

He took the baton pressing it into my side. I held back my screams, biting down tighter on the cloth in my mouth. He pulled away only to hit me with it again. This shock was different. My body froze. I could feel all the veins in my body vibrate in distress. Just as I could feel myself turning towards the darkness I saw Clarke's body quickly shift. She picked up Bishop's knife, in one swift motion piercing it through his back. The rest of Bishop's men and women rushed towards her pinning her to the ground. A large smile on her face. Bishop ripped the knife out of her back, loud groans slipping from his lips as he crawled over to Clarke. Her arms tied above her head, and her legs tied beneath her.

"You know I love it when you get feisty with me beautiful." He turned back towards me, a large smile on his face. I would give anything right now to rip that smile off his face. He leaned into my face again. His breath hitting my face. "Time for the real fun now. Mr. Blake." My body itched to smack the smug look off his face. I threw my head back instantly ramming my head into Bishop's face. He flew back, his head landing on Clarke's stomach. The blood pouring out of his nose. He cuffed his face grabbing another piece of cloth to control the bleeding.

"You're going to regret that." He turned around making his way to the other side of Clarke, her body stretched out in front of me. Her clothes barely covering her body. "Hold him in place. Make him watch this." The two men grabbed both my shoulders, holding my face in place. The women sat on both ends of Clarke. One holding her legs down, the other holding down her arms.

He straddled his legs on both sides of Clarke, pressing one hand into the floor beside Clarke's head. She threw her head to the side, looking away. Her eyes squeezed shut. I tried to move, but the men kept me in place. My screams muted by the gag around my mouth. He leaned down pressing kisses into her chest. I tried to scream louder, maybe if I screamed loud enough someone outside would hear.

Bishop moved lower, reaching her stomach. Moving back to one side, he kept his eyes on mine. Taunting me every chance he got. He leaned down pressing a kiss into Clarke's pelvis, but she swung her legs up kneeing his jaw. Bishop's head shot to the woman in charge of holding her legs. He backhanded her, blood splattering across the floor. She wiped her mouth pushing down Clarke's legs tighter.

Clarke wiggled her body around trying to move away from him, but he just held her down harder. He reached for the button of her pants when Alexandra jumped forward grabbing the stun baton shocking the two men holding me. Bishop quickly stood up along-side the two women who had been holding Clarke. Holding the baton out her hands began shaking. "Get in the corner or else."

"Or else what? There's three of us, but only one of you." Alexandra swung the baton forward with full force, threatening Bishop's confidence. He backed up slightly, almost tripping over his own feet. I began to mumble, Alexandra's eyes peering over at me. She slowly stepped closer, one hand tightly gripped around the baton and the other trying to undo my restraints. One of the men gained consciousness, trying to grab her leg but I quickly kicked my legs back knocking him back out.

She undid one of my hands, I quickly undid my legs as she made her way to my other hand. Her whole body was shaking with fear. "You don't just get to torture people. You don't just get to use people. They are good people." Her voice was broken down, tears still falling down her face. She swallowed the lump in her throat. "You deserve to die. For everything you've done to them, to me, to our people."

Bishop stepped forward the other two women following close behind him. I quickly jumped in front of Alexandra, taking the baton from her hands. She let out a sigh of relief. "Three against three now seems like a fair fight."

"There's only two of you." Right as he said that Clarke whipped her legs beneath Bishop and the two women. All of them falling straight to the floor. Alexandra stepped forward trying to help Clarke, but Bishop kicked her away. Immediately he grabbed Clarke by the neck, holding a knife to her throat. "If you want her to live I suggest you do what I say."

Clarke shook her head, giving me the go-ahead to attack but I can't. I can't risk her life. I backed away setting the baton on the ground and stretching my arms out by my side. The women harshly pressed my arms into my back. Clarke let out a disappointed sigh. Bishop released her pushing her back into the floor. I was pushed back onto my knees.

I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I knew Clarke died because of me. I had already spent months thinking she had sacrificed herself for the rest of us, but now it's different. I have a choice now, and I won't let her do this again. As much as it hurts to see her like this I know we can get through this together. Before they stuffed the cloth back into my mouth I nodded at Clarke. "Oso throu daun ogeda." [We fight together.]


	31. Chapter 31

**My Fight is Over**

 **Clarke:**

The corners of Bellamy's eyes crinkled, his forehead forming a deep crease. That was his chance and he wasted it. He could've left. But I know Bellamy, he would never forgive himself if he left me. Forgiveness is hard for him. He lowered his head, tears slipping down his cheek mixing in with the sweat glowing on his face.

Bishop lightly loosened his grip around my chest, moving the knife away from my neck. It felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. His heavy breath ran down my neck, sending chills down my spine. He moved his hand up around my neck, choking me from behind. His nails dug deep into my skin as he slowly squeezed his hand tighter closing my airway. I could feel him grip my trachea harder. All the air cut off from my lungs. I felt my blood circulation slow down, my head getting lighter. The only viable sound I can make out is the sound of my blood rushing to get the oxygen through my body and Bellamy's muffled screams. Bishop pressed his lips against my ear. "Try that again and I'll have Bellamy's head on a platter."

He released his grip on my neck, shoving my face into the ground as he stood up. As all the oxygen rushed into my body I tried to catch my breath recovering my strength. My lungs felt like they were going to collapse. I rested my head against the cold ship floor. Suddenly Bishop tightly clasped his hands around my ankles dragging me towards a small bed in the corner of the room. My shirt rolled up leaving my back naked against the cold floor. The metal burning against my skin. Bellamy silently watched, his eyes burned with fear and anger.

Once he got me to the edge of the bed he picked me up throwing me onto the bed. A sharp pain shooting through my spine, like needles pressing into my skin. He took my arms, pulling them above my head tying them to the headboard. My muscles ached, a part of me felt like I couldn't take anymore but I knew I had to for Madi, for Bellamy, for my family.

He yanked my legs towards the foot of the bed tying them down on opposite ends of the bed. The pain from the poorly stitched laceration on my thigh radiated through my entire body. The feeling was almost as bad as the burns I had to deal with after Praimfaya. The slightest movements took a large toll on me. I closed my eyes trying to push away the pain, but it was all becoming too much to bear.

I peered over to see Bishop making his way towards Bellamy. He leaned down wrapping a hand around Bellamy's neck pulling him to his feet. Bellamy let out a dull, choked grunt as Bishop pushed him towards the side of the bed, immediately pushing him onto his knees.

Bishop scoffed turning back towards Alexandra. He grabbed her by her legs pulling her limp body beside Bellamy. Alexandra didn't deserve any of this. She's suffering because of us too. She tried to help. I need to help.

"How about we see how well you take direction." Bishop stood at the foot of the bed, his arms crossed, eyebrows raised. "Alexandra will be your Clarke for now. Whatever I do to Clarke, you have to do to that traitor." My eyes shot to Bellamy. His face filled with regret. He turned his head towards Bishop, his eyes threatening to rip him apart. "And if you don't copy me then Clarke will suffer the consequences."

"She's not even conscious!" I felt the lump in my throat grow. Bishop began laughing, kneeling beside Alexandra. He grabbed her face, moving it around in an aggressive attempt to wake her up. When he realized she wasn't waking up he dropped her face, turning towards the guards quietly standing in the corner of the room.

One of the women picked up the baton walking towards Alexandra's limp body. The buzz of the electricity running through the baton made my heart twitch. Bellamy turned his head away, his expression closing off, his jaw tightly clenched. She began lashing Alexandra as she laid on the floor completely unresponsive.

"Stop! Just let me help her." My voice was broken, but I didn't care. I couldn't let them do this to her. The woman ignored me, continuing to send electric waves through her body. "Let me help her and I'll help you negotiate with our commander." The woman stopped, her eyes darting up to Bishop.

Bishop silently contemplated my offer, his eyes shooting back and forth from Bellamy's face to mine. Bellamy stared at me, but I kept my eyes on Bishop. He knows this is right. He knows we can't let her just die.

"How would you help me?" Bishop raised an eyebrow. His eyes running me up and down. He leaned against the wall, eyes narrowed down at me.

"You only need me to negotiate." I could feel Bellamy's eyes practically boring holes into my face, but I kept my attention on Bishop. "Bellamy is nothing. He holds no true value to our people. But I was the former leader. I know the ground better than anyone. I'm our primary doctor. I'm the only one who knows where to get food and how to get it. Our new commander needs me. I'm your best bargaining chip."

"Last time you said you were the leader, you convinced me to release the real leader of your people. How do I know you're not lying again?" He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, his arms folding in front of him.

"Look at him. Does he look like he's a doctor or an engineer or a farmer? He's of minimal importance. He's a good fighter if anything. Other than that, he's nothing to anyone. You already have me, you don't need him too. He's just a dead weight." Bishop rubbed his chin considering everything. "I'm one of our best doctors and a close trustee to the commander. He's my husband, yes. But that's why I'm telling you. Let him live. I'll do anything you want. Just let him go."

I could feel Bellamy staring at me. His message was clear, I didn't even need to look at him to know that he was angry. Probably furious. I didn't mean any of it, but he knows that. If anything, Bellamy is what our people need more. They need his strength, his ambition. They need his knowledge and experience. He was always the better leader, always more equipped for the job. If he goes out I know he'll get me back. I know he'll find a way. I know I'll be okay, we'll be okay.

"Fine." I felt my heart skip a beat. Closing my eyes, I let out a deep breath I hadn't realized I was holding. I turned my head towards Bellamy, his eyes yelling at me in every way possible to stop but I just blinked telling him it was okay. I could see it in his face, he wanted to scream. Why are you doing this? Why are you lying? I need you. Please. Don't. I weakly smiled down at him trying to reassure him.

"But I need to make sure he doesn't come back to get you." My head snapped back towards Bishop, his hand tightly gripped around his knife. A large grin on his face.

Bishop made his way towards Bellamy pulling him up by his throat. I could feel my heart being ripped out of my chest. "WAIT." Bishop glared down at me. Bellamy shifted away from his hold. "Let me say goodbye." Bishop looked at me confused by my audacity to make demands. "Please. If you have to kill me at least let me have this. Just once. Then I'll do anything you want."

"Make it quick." Bishop untied my legs and the woman untied my arms. My sore limbs falling at my sides, a slight sigh of relief slipped through my lips.

I dropped to my knees in front of Bellamy, hot tears streaming down my face. I took the cloth out of his mouth. He immediately pulled his arms above his head giving me room to move closer and hug him, my hands linking at the base of his back. His arms fell around me as he buried his face into the crook of my neck, his nose nuzzling into my hair inhaling deeply. I placed a soft kiss into the base of his neck my tears running down his bare shoulders.

"Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotaim," [May we meet again.] I whispered into his ear. I could feel his tears run down my neck, a hitch in his breathing. I closed my eyes taking in every second of this moment. Embracing every ounce of Bellamy, I could have. A part of me believes he will fight for me, but another part of me believes that this is and will be the last time I ever see him. "Ai hod yu in." [I love you.] At least now I can die knowing that Bellamy knows I love him. That my mom knows I love her. That Madi won't be alone.

He squeezed me a little tighter, placing a soft kiss to the base of my ear. "Oso gonplei nou ste odon." [Our fight isn't over.] He pressed another kiss to my ear. "We will meet again." He lifted his arms above his head releasing me. Before moving back, I pressed a kiss against his lips savoring his lips as if it were the last time. I took in the taste of him, his soft lips, the passion, the love. If this really was our last kiss I wanted to save it forever.

Our kiss was broken when Bishop took the baton sending a shock of electricity through my body. All the veins in my body just ready to burst. I kept my composure leaning away from Bellamy and pushing myself back onto the edge of the bed.

The woman grabbed my legs tying them to the bed tightly. The rope biting against my skin leaving bruises on both ankles. She proceeded to tie my wrists to the headboard.

Bishop pushed Bellamy down pressing his face into the ground with his knee. Bellamy's groans muffled by the floor. Bishop took his knife jabbing it deep into his side. Bellamy let out a grunt, his breathing growing heavy from the pain. Once Bellamy laid on his back Bishop took the knife, pushing it deeper into him and dragging it towards the center of his stomach. Bellamy's cries echoed throughout the room but quickly came to an end as he fell unconscious.

"You didn't have to do that! You could have severed some of his organs! You're supposed to let him live!" A large teasing smile grew on Bishop's face. He wiped some blood off his knife using it to draw a line down my chest.

"That's why Alexandra is going to make sure he gets taken care of." He continued to clean off Bellamy's blood from the knife licking his blood off his fingers. "Take them and throw them somewhere, then go back to the prisoner deck. No one should have any suspicions that you were ever gone. If they get to them on time, then maybe your darling husband will survive." The two men grabbed Bellamy dragging his body towards the back door, a large trail of blood following them. The women dragged Alexandra out by her arms.

"That wasn't the deal! You have to let me help him!" I pulled against the restraints, screaming as loud as I could. If someone hears me, they'll come.

Bishop's eyes grew wide. He quickly took his knife jamming it into my thigh once more, tearing open my stitches. I continued screaming as loud as possible. He ripped out the knife, holding it directly to my throat. "Scream again and I'll rip out your vocal chords." He pressed the knife down, leaving a deep gash on my neck.

I laid my head back, bursting into laughter. "If I'm dead you won't get what you want." Terror overtook his face once the realization hit him. "Yeah. That's what I thought. You can kill me, sure. But if you want to survive, you need me." Bishop may have been the leader of the prisoner ship, but he had no experience with manipulation or negotiations or even torture. He's psychotic but completely inexperienced.

I continued to laugh hysterically, throwing my head back. My vision grew fuzzier by the minute. I was losing too much blood. "Ai gonplei ste odon." [My fight is over.] I slipped into the darkness, my eyes fluttering, the pain taking over my body.

 **Madi:**

I sat by Octavia's side as Abby patched her up, sharpening my knife. Octavia said it was her way of keeping calm, but it wasn't working. All I could think of was that I left Clarke by herself. Just so I could get a better view of the fight. If something happens to her it'll be my fault.

The door burst open and Monty came running towards us. He placed his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath. He began mumbling, breathing heavily between each word. Abby placed a hand on his back, gently rubbing it to help him breathe. "Monty sit down. What's wrong?"

He continued breathing heavily. "Bellamy. Clarke." He coughed a little, his throat letting out a raspy noise. "I saw Bellamy and Clarke. They were taken by some prisoners. They used some inside tunnels that the cameras don't cover. They can be anywhere." He let out a deep breath and a groan. "There's an image of Clarke being taken into the ship, but that's it. Then they disappear. Same with Bellamy."

Octavia sat up whipping her sword out of its sheath. "Where the hell are the guards who were in charge of watching the prisoners?" She jumped off the bed, charging through Monty and Abby making her way towards the door. Monty and I quickly followed behind her.

"They were there. They just did a sweep of the prisoner deck. It's all intact. They don't know how they got out." Monty was running at Octavia's side. I followed closely behind.

"They got out Monty. We've had guards there nonstop since we put them all in there. There has to be a way we don't know about." Octavia pushed through the guards standing in the hallway before the prisoner deck. Each guard fearfully filed out of her way. "I want to know who the hell was in charge of watching the prisoners today!" There was a silence among all the guards, their heads hung low. Octavia punched the wall beside her. "I said who the hell was in charge?"

Penn stepped forward he raised his chin, his eyes narrowed down to Octavia. "While you were out there wasting time, I was watching the prisoners." He puffed his chest out, challenging Octavia.

Octavia wordlessly uppercuts Penn, blood splattering on the wall behind him. She continued to punch him, but no one dared to stop her. Penn tried to fight back, but he was no match. Once Octavia let out her anger she stepped back letting out a deep breath. She slowly calmed her breathing. Penn pulled his shirt up, wiping the blood off his face. "If you were here watching the prisoners, then you'd know that some of them escaped." She pushed him back into the wall, pressing up against him. "Because of your carelessness, they kidnapped two of the most important people in this damn camp."

Azuma quickly made his way down the hallway grabbing Octavia and pressing her against the wall. He whispered something in her ear, immediately calming her down. Octavia's head snapped over towards the group of guards standing in the hallway. "You all are going to sweep that prisoner deck. Right now. And we're going to find out how the hell they got out."

Octavia busied herself on the prison deck. I quickly slipped away running down the halls. This is my fault. I need to find them. No one knows this ship better than I do. I slipped into the staircase making my way towards the control deck of the ship.

Once I opened the door to the control deck I felt a hand wrap around my wrist, pulling me back. "Madi, what are you doing here? You know you shouldn't be out here when there are prisoners loose in the ship," Murphy whispered. He looked angry, his eyes nostrils flaring, and his forehead creasing. He began pulling me down the hallway towards the control room where Raven stood in front of a series of computers. "Stay here. I'm going to find Clarke and Bellamy. They would never forgive me if I let anything happen to you."

"This is my fault." His eyes softened as he stared down at me, the crease on his forehead slowly becoming smoother. There was a questioning look on his face. Raven's eyes focused on me too, complete shock on her face. "I left Clarke alone to get a better view of the fight. I left her there. I should have..."

Murphy wrapped his arms around me, my face burying into his chest. He softly rubbed my back, placing his chin on the top of my head. "You couldn't have known. This isn't your fault." He pulled away holding my face in his hands. "But if you leave this room and you get taken, then it'll be my fault and I can't let that happen." He let me go, once more running his hand along my cheek. He reached into his back pocket, pulling out a shotgun and placing it into my hand. "Take care of Raven."

He quickly made his way out the door, picking up a larger gun hanging on the wall before he left. I turned towards Raven. She had a large, shocked smile on her face. "You know he's only like that with you and Emori. But to the rest of the world, he's a big...jerk." She tried to lighten the mood, but I let me head hand low. A tear slipping down my cheek. Raven pulled my chin up, making me look at her. "Hey. None of that. You've got two strong parents who are probably fighting their way back to you. How about you help me try to find them on these cameras?"

I nodded as Raven brought her attention back to the screens in front of her. Her eyes darting all around. I looked everywhere too, desperate the find them somewhere but it was hopeless. There was no sign of them.

After an hour Raven sat back in her chair, letting out a deep sigh. She began massaging her leg with one hand and massaging her temples with the other. She stopped massaging her leg for a second to punch the table. Letting out a loud angry cry.

I rested my hand on hers. "I've got two strong parents, remember? They're probably fighting their way back to us." She gave me a weak smile placing her other hand on mine, slowly rubbing little circles into the back of my hand.

"You're right, kid. They will fight, but it'd be nice if we could do something to make that fight easier." I released her hand letting her massage her temples again.

The door slowly opened. Murphy walked in, his head hanging low. He looked completely defeated. He put his gun back on the wall, Murphy was followed by Octavia, Azuma, Miller, Kane, Monty, Indra, Harper, Emori, and Abby.

Everyone stood around the room silently. Miller wrapped an arm around my shoulders, giving me a gentle squeeze. Murphy came and stood beside me, a sad smile on his face. Abby curled into Kane's chest, tears streaming down her cheeks. Everyone's heads hung low.

No. This wasn't fair. We were barely just going to be a family. We were going to be happy. Together. Abby's cries were muffled in Kane's shirt. He rubbed circles into the small of her back with one hand, rubbing her head with the other. Harper leaned into Monty resting her head on his shoulder.

"We've searched all the possible places they could be. They're not in the hidden tunnels of the prisoner decks. They're not in the any of the control rooms. They're not in the armory. Where the hell are they?" Octavia punched the wall again. The bruises on her knuckles becoming a darker shade of purple. Azuma placed a hand on her shoulder, calming her down.

"What if they're somewhere you don't expect them to go?" Everyone's heads snapped towards me. A shocked look on their faces. "If it were me and I wanted to go somewhere where no one could find me I'd go to a place no one would check."

Raven pointed at me, a spark in her eyes. "You're right. We've been trying to predict the most reasonable place to take them, but how about the most unreasonable place?" Raven stepped forward locking me into a tight hug. "Madi, you're a genius."

There was a light look on everyone's faces now, a spark of hope. "Madi, where would you go in the ship if you wanted to hide?" Monty stepped closer, placing a warm hand on my shoulder. His eyes wide as he stared down at me.

"I go to other people's rooms. No one ever barges into anyone's room unless it's one of you so I go to one of the empty rooms or one of the rooms where the other kids stay." Monty snapped his fingers, a gleam in his eyes.

He pulled me into a tight, suffocating hug. Holding me longer than usual. "You really are Clarke's daughter." He let out a laugh, and there was an exchange of light laughter around the room. Monty turned towards the computers with Raven, he began typing away his eyes running all over the screens in front of him.

Murphy wrapped his arm around my shoulder. He gave me a reassuring squeeze. "Being like Clarke is a good thing, Madi."

"It means you're smart, fearless, strong." Octavia chimed in, lightly smiling from across the room. "But you're also a lot like Bellamy. Hardheaded, intimidating, wise beyond your years." Murphy squeezed my shoulders once more before letting go.

He turned towards the wall picking the gun off the wall. I followed him, taking the gun from his hands. Before he could argue I cut him off. "My family, my responsibility." He threw his hands up without protest. I wrapped the strap of the gun around my torso to support the weight of the gun, making sure the strap of the gun didn't interfere with my reach for my sword. Indra, Azuma, and Octavia whipped out their swords while everyone proceeded to pick up guns.

"How would they have gotten into the living quarters? There are hallway cameras up and down there, but no sign of either of them." Monty looked away from the screen, his brows furrowed. Tension clear in his face.

Everyone around the room tensed. "Backdoors. Our cameras don't cover the backdoors." Raven pulled a gun out of the holster in her pants making her way around the control panel.

"What do you think you're doing?" Murphy stretched his arm out in front of him, trying to hold her back.

Raven's eyebrows drew together, her eyes squinting down at him. "We're all doing this together. Bellamy and Clarke have always fought for all of us, together. We will too."

Monty pulled a gun out of his holster standing behind Raven. The corners of his mouth tugging into a smile. "Ogeda." [Together]

Everyone exchanged looks and we all chanted, "Ogeda." We all filed out of the room quickly making our way down the stairs. Murphy stayed back to stay with Raven as she slowly followed. I stood in front beside Octavia. Azuma and Indra stayed close behind her.

Once we made it down to the living quarters we paused at the end of the hall. I looked to Octavia. "We should each take a hall."

Octavia hesitated, taking into consideration the danger of being alone. "In partners. Madi, you'll come with me. Azuma and Indra. Murphy and Emori. Kane and Abby. Monty and Harper. Raven and Miller." Everyone exchanged looks all sharing agreeing nods. "Okay, everyone do a full sweep down the halls. If you find them, then use your radio."

I headed down a quiet hall, Octavia following closely behind me. We began knocking on doors checking all the rooms, bathrooms, closets. But it felt hopeless. Most rooms were empty, but a few were occupied. Most of Wonkru preferred to live outside.

I tried to open one of the doors, but it was locked. Punching in the master code didn't work. I took the radio from my waistband. "Monty, Raven there's a door here that won't open with our code. You think this is it?"

There was a silence on the other end, but quickly I heard footsteps running my way. Octavia ran up against the wall, trying to punch in the code but it didn't work. She punched the wall again. Monty came running towards us, running his fingers along the panel on the wall.

"This panel. It's different from the rest. They have to be in there." He pulled out a little black book immediately fiddling with the keypad on the panel. He began punching in a series of different codes.

"Can you open it or not?" Octavia leaned against the wall beside him. Her eyes narrowed on Monty.

Monty ignored her, waving a hand in the air to brush her off. He was focused, his eyes squinting down at the pad occasionally shifting back and forth between his book and the panel, his cheeks occasionally sucking in when he got a code wrong. Now everyone had gathered around the door, eager to run in and see what's behind the door.

After a few minutes, Monty snapped himself back to reality. "I'm such an idiot. Of course." He whipped out a small tablet, quickly connecting a wire between the panel the tablet. He began working on the tablet. After a few minutes, he looked over at Octavia. "Are you ready?" Octavia stood in front of the door, her hand gripped tightly around her sword. I stood close behind her, everyone else followed suit. She nodded.

Monty's attention shifted back to the tablet, he unlocked the door. Immediately there was a confirmation beep and the door swiped open. Octavia and I ran in, but all I heard was a fury of gunshots before everything went dark.


	32. Chapter 32

**How to Save a Life**

 **Abby:**

Monty tilted his head towards Octavia, a concerned look on his face. "Are you ready?" Octavia stepped towards the door, standing in the doorway. Madi stood close behind her followed by Murphy, Emori, Harper, Miller, and Azuma. Octavia gave Monty a slight nod, giving him the all clear.

His eyes focused back down on the tablet in his hand. As soon as he unlocked the door the lights on the panel Octavia rushed through the door. The sound of gunshots began ringing in my ears muffling the sound of screams. Once the shooting came to an end Indra, Marcus, and I rushed inside.

It was horrific. There was blood splattered all over the walls. I froze in the doorway. The sound of Monty and Murphy on the floor groaning beside Madi and Octavia. Octavia's lifeless body lying on top of Madi. Marcus carefully picked Octavia up, setting her to the side. His hand desperately clasped around her wrist taking her pulse. He let out a deep sigh of relief quickly turned towards me. "She's alive. But she won't be for long. She jumped in front of Madi to protect her."

I jumped to Madi's side quickly checking her for any severe bullet wounds. Indra carefully held her head in her hands, her thumbs softly caressing Madi's temples. Madi had been grazed in the arm by a bullet, but nothing direct. "She'll be fine." I pulled out a bandage, quickly wrapping up her arm. "There's no visible bleeding coming from her head, she should be fine. Just stay with her." Indra

I turned to look around the room. Alexandra sat in the corner with Bellamy's pale face lying in her lap. Her face was covered in bruises and dry blood, her veins inflamed. She had tears pouring down her face. Her arms were clasped around the gun, her entire body was shaking. I ran towards her, checking Bellamy's pulse. "He's alive. I tried to fix him once I woke up, but I was scared those people would come back." She began sobbing loudly, her voice breaking through each word. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I thought...I thought..."

I grabbed her arm pulling her off the floor. "I know. I know. But this isn't the time. We need you to tell us what happened." She looked down to Bellamy lying on the ground.

Marcus carried Octavia towards Bellamy carefully setting her beside him. "Get Jackson down here now. I need more medkits and apprentices. We need all-hands-on-deck." Marcus quickly grabbed his radio, turning towards the door. "Alexandra. I need you to be a doctor for me, okay? I can't-do this alone." She nodded gently. Her pupils flared, the icy blue color of her eyes drowned by a sea of red. She sniffled pulling out lap pads to control the bleeding from Octavia's abdomen. "Okay, Octavia has 5 gunshot wounds. I need you to see if they're critical."

I shifted to Bellamy's side quickly cleaning up the blood pouring out of his stomach. "Emori, Harper, Azuma, Indra bring Madi, Monty, and Murphy over here. I need you all to help."

Emori's head whipped around, tears streaming down her face, fists clenched tightly at her side. "That bitch." Emori charged towards Alexandra, Harper following closely behind her. Miller grabbed Harper by the waist pulling her to the side. Azuma quickly jumped in pulling Emori. "Let me go!" Emori fought against Azuma, but he tightened his grip around her.

"This isn't the time. We need her right now. If you want Monty and John to survive you need to cooperate." Emori's tears came to a halt as she looked down at John's limp body lying on the floor. Harper took a few deep breaths, her body slowly relaxing in Miller's arms. "Emori I need your help. Bellamy has a deep laceration and lots of bleeders I need help getting a clear view so I can check all his organs. Harper start disinfecting John and Monty's wounds. As soon as Jackson gets in here he'll help you."

Marcus made his way back into the room. He began running his hands through his hair, letting out a deep breath. Kneeling in front of Alexandra he grabbed both her shoulders. "Do you know where Clarke is? Is she okay? What happened?"

She kept her eyes focused on Octavia's limp body, using forceps to pull out pieces of the bullets lodged into her skin. "Bishop," she sobbed. Tears began rolling down her face again. "He has her. He had me and Bellamy too." Her whole body froze, she closed her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again. "He has her in one of the living quarters. He's been torturing her. Clarke somehow convinced him to let Bellamy live in exchange for her life. I woke up when they threw us in here."

"Please. I can't let her die. She's gone because of me." My head shot up towards Madi. Hot tears streaming down her cheeks. Her eyes became dark as she studied Alexandra carefully, her breathing growing heavy, nostrils flaring, her hands tightened into two fists at her side. She looked just like Clarke. "I left her alone. I need to get her back. She's all I have." There was a break in her voice, followed by a soft sniffle.

Indra quickly wrapped her arm around her shoulders, Madi slightly leaned the back of her head into her chest, her eyes narrowed down at Alexandra. "This is not your fault. Your mother is a fighter. She is strong. You will get her back." Indra ran her hand up and down Madi's arm, a kind gesture completely out of character for the once ruthless warrior. But that was what Madi did to everyone. She brought the best in everyone, even Indra. "But it's because of her that you aren't alone. You are one of us now. And we _will_ get her back."

"It's my fault all of this happened. To her. Bellamy. To Octavia. Murphy and Monty." She hung her head low, carefully watching her feet.

"No this is not your fault. This is all on Bishop." Madi carefully stepped forward, kneeling between Marcus and Alexandra. Alexandra's face slowly turned towards Madi, a guilty look on her face. Marcus placed a supporting hand on Madi's shoulder, rubbing soft circles into her muscles.

"I found the gun in this room. It was in one of the drawers. I needed to defend myself. I'm sorry. I didn't know." Emori shot Alexandra a glare, she slightly cringed quickly shaking it away and focusing back on Bellamy. Alexandra winced, her face went completely pale. She nibbled on her bottom lip, closing her eyes and letting out a deep sigh. "He cut into the wound on her leg. He lashed her with one of your batons. He tried to..." She let out a soft sob, a tear slipping down her cheek as she closed her eyes. "He's in the living quarters on the first floor."

Marcus jumped up to his feet, quickly making his way towards Indra and Azuma. Madi quickly following closely behind him. Indra pressed her hand into Madi's shoulder, pushing her back. "No. We will get her."

Madi rolled her shoulder, pushing Indra's hand away. "I am going. You may be in charge, but no one knows this ship better than me." Azuma raised an eyebrow, impressed by the resilience clearly instilled by Clarke. "Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim." [Get knocked down, get back up.] Marcus and Indra exchanged looks, nodding in agreement. They turned back towards the door, exchanging ideas for a plan Madi carefully chiming in with advice occasionally.

Marcus grabbed a gun from the floor. Madi, Azuma, and Indra carefully pulled out their swords. As they left the room Jackson rushed in, his eyes widening as he took in the horrific scene in front of him. He scanned the room quickly getting down to his knees beside Monty, questioning Harper about his status. Besides them Raven was working on John, yelling directions at an apprentice who was fearfully digging through a med kit.

I focused my attention back to Bellamy. "Okay, Emori. I need you to hand me the scalpel, some hemostatic forceps, a retractor, a spreader, lots of lap pads, and suction. I need to look into the damage." Emori dug her hands through the medkit pulling out a 10-inch blade and a spreader, carefully placing them into my hand. She continued digging through the bag to find the rest of the instruments.

I carefully took the scalpel cutting deeper into Bellamy's abdomen, getting a better view of his organs. Emori quickly began to suction some of the blood, giving me a better view but it was still compromised. I dug my hands into his body, feeling around for any significant wounds. There was crucial bleeding coming from his stomach and kidney. I pressed my fingers into his stomach, slowing down the bleeder.

"I need sutures." She fumbled with the bag quickly pulling them out and holding them out in front of me. "I need your hand to replace mine, but I need you to apply pressure. Enough pressure to where it'll stop bleeding, but not too much because that can kill him." She frantically nodded, her eyes wide but determined.

Without much hesitation, she dug her hand into Bellamy's stomach tightly pressing it against the back of mine. I quickly slipped my hand out to suture his stomach together. Bellamy was only getting paler, his breathing falling even shallower than before. His pulse was growing fainter.

"I need blood bags. Even if I can fix him right now he's going to need a transfusion." I looked around the room to see everyone frantically working on Madi, Octavia, John, and Monty. "Someone get me some damn blood." Everyone's head shot towards me. I could feel my eyes burning with tears and my breathing became heavier. Bellamy has done everything to take care of Clarke. I can't let him die. I won't let him die.

Jackson turned toward the apprentice sitting beside him. "Get her some damn blood, Mel." His head whipped back down to Monty lying in front of him. Monty and John would be okay, they only had one shot each. They were slowly slipping in and out of consciousness, but Octavia was still out cold.

"Emori. I need some epinephrine. We need to keep his heart beating." My voice was almost as shaky as my hands. She quickly used her free hand to dig through the bag, passing me the epi pen. I stabbed it into Bellamy's arm, his body quickly reacting to the adrenaline rushing through his body. I quickly stitched up his stomach, the bleeding from his stomach still excessively pooling up in his body.

Once his heartbeat grew a little stronger I continued to dig into his body. His kidney was severed almost completely. "Jackson. His kidney is gone." I began to sob hysterically. My eyes darting around the room. "He can live without a kidney, but he can face deficits. I don't even know if his other kidney is viable." Jackson finished stitching up Monty before making his way towards Bellamy. He immediately dropped to his knees beside Emori.

Emori jumped up taking advantage of Jackson's presence to check on John. A few sobs slipping through her mouth as she sat by his side, holding onto his hand as if it were the only thing keeping her from floating away into space. I looked back to Jackson who was running his hands through Bellamy, suctioning away excess blood to get a better view.

"We can save his kidney, but we'll need to get him up to medical. There's no way we can perform a surgery like this without proper materials and a sterile environment." He picked up a clamp, pressing it down against a torn artery. "He has a tear in his sigmoid artery. If we don't fix that fixing his kidney won't help him at all." I felt the tears run down my face, the desperation of wanting Bellamy to survive slowly taking over me. "Abby. We'll get him back."

Jackson continued to use the clamps to control the bleeding. "Someone get a gurney. We need to get him to medical. Now," he yelled, the nerves clear in his voice. Jackson pressed some lap pads against his stomach as Bellamy was carried onto a gurney rolled in by some apprentices.

If I lose Bellamy, I'll lose Clarke too. Even if Clarke survives I'll lose a part of her. A part only Bellamy brought out in her. Bellamy has become a large part of my family and I can't handle losing either of them again.

Jackson got an apprentice to take care of applying pressure, before turning back towards me. He took a knee in front of me, grabbing me by my shoulders and giving me a nice shake before pulling me in for a tight hug. "I'll take him up now and get everything set up. See what you can do with Octavia. I'll radio when I need you." Jackson pulled away, squeezing my shoulders once, followed by a weak smile. His eyes were glazed with tears, but he quickly blinked them away. "He'll be fine. Clarke will be fine." His voice sounded sweet, almost calming.

Once he stood up and left I crawled beside Octavia. More hot tears rolling down my cheeks as I hovered over her limp, lifeless body. Alexandra had opened her up a little deeper, using clamps and suction to get a clear view of the damage.

"I've got it from here. I think it's best if you go up to medical with Jackson." I looked around the room, Harper was cradling Monty's head gently caressing his hair as she waited for another gurney to come and take Monty upstairs. Emori sat at John's side, her hand carefully wrapped around John's as Raven tried to dig the bullets out of him.

Alexandra quickly made her way out of the room, avoiding the deathly glares from Harper and Emori. I turned my attention back down to Octavia, her chest carefully rising and falling. I quickly checked her for severe damage. Four of the bullets had artificial wounds, nothing serious. But one had lodged itself into the base of her neck.

"I need to get her up to medical. Now. She has a bullet wound in her neck." A few apprentices made their way over with a gurney. Both of them carefully made their ways to Octavia's side. "If that bullet is lodged into her carotid any sudden movements can kill her. So, like we practiced I need you to move in unison when picking her up."

They exchanged a nervous look. One boy carefully placed his hands underneath her shoulders, allowing her head to fall into his chest. The other boy grabbed both of her ankles, cautiously following the other boy's lead.

My radio let out a sharp noise, echoing throughout the room. Pulling everyone's attention to me. The sound of a distraught Jackson peered over the radio. "Abby Are you there?" he yelled.

I quickly picked up the radio sitting beside me. "Yes. What's wrong? Is Bellamy okay?"

There were a few seconds of silence before his heavy breathing was heard over the radio. The sound of a defibrillator warming up echoed throughout the room. Everyone's eyes widening as they listened in. Jackson began yelling over the radio. "Stop. He's going into anaphylactic shock. I need an epi." He was yelling at someone in the background, probably one of the apprentices. "If the epi doesn't work, then you shock him." I let out a deep breath that I had been holding in. "Abby. I need you. He's crashing, fast. If we don't do this now he won't make it."

 **Madi:**

I slowly opened my eyes, carefully letting them flicker to adjust to the light above me. I felt fingers rubbing my temples carefully. Once my vision came back to me I saw Indra hovering above me. Her eyes widened, her mouth falling open.

I quickly sat up, my vision becoming blurry again. Indra's eyebrows knitted together as she stared at me. "What happened? Where's Clarke? Where's Bellamy? Where's Octavia? What..."

Indra placed her hand on my shoulder, her eyes falling to the floor, and her head lowering. "They're being taken care of. Right now, we need to get you taken care of or they'll all have my head." I ignored her quickly standing up to see Bellamy and Octavia lying side by side, blood pouring out of their bodies.

Alexandra was curled up at Octavia's side, picking at the wounds all over her body. Abby sat at Bellamy's side, tears rolling down her cheeks as she stared at Kane trying to talk to Alexandra. "Where did you get the gun? What did they do to Clarke?" Alexandra stared down at Octavia, her hands digging through the bullet wound in her stomach. Kane rested his hand on her shoulder, her head shooting over to look at him. "Please."

I stepped forward. Anger coursed throughout my body. This is all my fault. Octavia, Monty, and Murphy were all hurt because of me. "Please. I can't let her die. She's gone because of me." Everyone turned towards me, a broken look on Abby's face as she looked up at me. "I left her alone. I need to get her back. She's all I have." My voice broke from the sobs, but I tried to swallow it.

Indra quickly wrapped her arm around my shoulders, "This is not your fault. Your mother is a fighter. She is strong. You will get her back." Indra ran her hand up and down my arm. It was comforting. I had heard stories of Indra from Clarke, all about how she was a strong and heartless warrior. But with me, she was different. Everyone had been a lot different than how Clarke had made them out to be. Indra squeezed my shoulder once more, the blood flowing faster through my body. "But it's because of her that you aren't alone. You are one of us now. And we _will_ get her back."

"It's my fault all of this happened. To her. Bellamy. Octavia. Murphy. Monty." I ducked my head, the guilt slowly taking over me.

"No this is not your fault. This is all on Bishop." Abby cautiously spoke up, her face scanning me over. I took a few steps forward, kneeling between Marcus and Alexandra. Alexandra's face slowly turned towards me, a pained look on her face. I felt a hand on my shoulder, but I focused on Alexandra, softly sobbing in front of me.

"I found the gun in this room. It was in one of the drawers. I needed to defend myself. I'm sorry. I didn't know." Alexandra cringed quickly shaking it away and focusing back on Octavia. She winced, her face went completely pale. She nibbled on her bottom lip, closing her eyes and letting out a deep sigh. "He cut into the wound on her leg. He lashed her with one of your batons. He tried to..." She let out another sob, closing her eyes for a few seconds. "He's in the living quarters on the first floor."

Marcus stood up quickly walking towards Indra and Azuma. I followed closely behind him if they were going to get Clarke I needed to be there. I won't let anything stop me. Indra pressed her hand into my shoulder, pushing me back. "No. We will get her." She narrowed her eyes down at me, her hand giving my shoulder a little squeeze. Her voice was soft but demanding.

I slipped my shoulder out of her grip, pushing her hand away. "I am going. You may be in charge, but no one knows this ship better than me." Azuma raised an eyebrow at me a shocked look on his face. "Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim." [Get knocked down, get back up.] Kane and Indra exchanged looks, nodding in agreement. We headed towards the door.

"So, we'll do a sweep of the entire floor until we find them," Kane suggested, his eyes focused on Indra as we headed towards the door.

"What if he has a gun too? We need to be more prepared." Indra shifted slightly away from Kane, her hands tightening around her sword.

"You guys do a sweep. I can get through the vents. If I'm up there I can tell you if he has any guns." Kane and Indra both looked over at me. I could see a conflicted look in their eyes as they debated internally with what to do. "Bellamy did that in Mount Weather. It gave them an advantage. We can't afford to lose anyone else right now."

Kane stopped, staring down at me. His weight shifted from one foot to the other, a nervous tick that he seemed to do a lot. "We can't afford to lose you, Madi. How can you be so sure that you won't get caught?"

"Because I've snuck in the vents to listen in on your guy's meetings before and you guys didn't notice." Kane's mouth fell open, a shocked look on his face. I looked over at Indra to see a slight smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth. She looked amused.

I bit down on my lip nervously waiting for Kane to say something, anything. Kane pulled a radio from his waistband, turning back towards the hallway. He continued walking, Indra and I following slowly behind him. "Fine, but you have to take a gun."

I almost hugged myself with excitement. I was going to get Clarke. I was going to find her. I was in charge. Indra nodded at me, pride in her eyes. We quickly made our way down, the other guards clearing people out of the occupied rooms as we prepared everything for me.

Kane handed me a map, I carefully folded it and placed it into my pocket. "Here's a map of the vent system. The openings that are circled are the ones we believe should be vacant. I want you to look through those first. Once you find them I want you to radio us. The vents here are at the bottom of the walls, so you'll have a lower view. Only shoot if you need to." Kane spoke so quickly, his nerves taking over him. He placed a can in my hand. I ran my fingers along the outside of its cold exterior. "This is knock-out gas. If you can, twist both sides in opposite directions and throw it in." He put a mask, covering my face carefully. "If you use that don't take this off, it'll prevent you from knocking out too." I felt my stomach knot up. This was it. I was going in by myself. Clarke's fate was up to me. "You can do this. I know you can."

I grabbed Kane, pulling him into a tight hug. His body began to relax. Once I pulled away he weakly smiled at me, placing a fully loaded shotgun in my hand. Azuma stepped forward wrapping his large arms around me, a scared look on his face. I buried my face into his chest. The sound of his heart beating against my ear. He cupped my cheek in his hand, staring down at me. A sad glimmer in his eyes. "Be careful."

I kneeled down to the vent on the floor, carefully making my way through it. The light from each room lighting my way towards the empty rooms. I swiftly moved through the vents, making sure to make minimal noise in case Bishop was listening in for any significant movements.

I reached the first few empty rooms, but there was nothing there. No sign of anyone staying there. I kept moving, as quickly as possible. My knees scraping against the metal, bruises forming in the palms of my hand.

There was a musty smell in the vents. It almost smelled like the old car that Clarke had once found with Finn and Wells. When Clarke had taken me there she made us stay the night there. She spent the whole night crying. She thought I was sleeping, but I heard her. I knew she was hurt, I knew it all meant so much to her. She lost a lot, but I wasn't going to let her go.

As I began to lose hope, crawling through the vents I found a room's light glowing down the row of rooms. I crawled as fast as I could, my knees threatening to give out beneath me. But that had to be where Clarke was. I knew it. Once I made it to the vent door, I heard it. Her voice.

"If you want to make a deal with the commander you have to offer her something she needs. She may need me, but that's not enough. Offer her something more." Clarke's voice was strong. She sounded okay. I moved to the other side to catch a glimpse of Clarke. She shifted on the bed, opposite from the vent. A groan slipping out of her mouth as she moved. "You can't fight. You're not a doctor. You're not an engineer. What are you good for? Why were you the leader of your people?"

Bishop let out a loud scream, punching Clarke in the stomach. His breathing grew heavy, but after punching Clarke a few times he relaxed. "I was a janitor. I was the leader of a rebellion. That's why I became the leader of our ship. I changed everything. Alexandra's family was in command, but I executed them all."

Clarke groaned again, shifting onto her side, looking up at Bishop. "Why didn't you kill her?" Bishop's head dropped, he didn't say anything. Clarke's eyes fell to the floor. Slowly making their way towards me. Once she caught a glimpse of me she bit back a gasp. Her eyes widening.

I put my hand up reassuring her that I was here to save her. There was dried blood all over her chest and stomach. A large gash on her thigh. She had a pained look on her face, but she brought her attention back to Bishop.

Bishop began pacing back and forth, waving a knife in the air as he walked. "Alexandra's family was also made up of all the doctors on the ship. Her mom, dad, and brother. She was the youngest and the last doctor. We needed someone." He stopped pacing and turned towards Clarke who laid herself back down. "For us, whichever family you were born to determined what you'd do with your life."

I could see Clarke flinch, but she remained calm. Always stronger under pressure. "So, you changed that. Made things better for your people, only to ruin that once you came down here?"

Bishop backhanded Clarke in the face, the sound of his hand against her cheek leaving an everlasting sound running through the vents. I couldn't help but flinch at the sound. "Go to hell."

I slowly began to turn the screws on the vents, moving out of sight so that Bishop wouldn't see me. My best shot would be the knock-out gas, I want to kill him myself but everyone emphasized that I could only kill him if I felt threatened.

Once I undid all the screws I carefully stuck my fingers through the bards making sure to make minimal noise. Twisting the can I threw the vent down sliding the can into the middle of the room. Bishop's eyes shot towards me. His eyes burning with anger, the corner of his mouth twitching. He reached down to grab something from his pants, but the gas knocked him out. Clarke lied unconscious on the bed. I quickly crawled out of the vent. Tears streaming down my face.

As I got onto my feet I ran towards Bishop and began kicking him. A kick for every person he's hurt, another kick for every time he hurt Clarke, another for every bullet the Octavia took because of him, another for the shots that Monty and Murphy took because of him, and one for ever trying to take my mom away from me.

After I finished I began walking towards the door, but I felt something grab my foot. Bishop grabbed my foot and ripped me back throwing me against the floor. He quickly jumped up pulling Clarke's limp body off the bed, holding a knife to her throat.

I took in Clarke's appearance. Her face and body covered in bruises and blood. She had cuts running down her chest and stomach, blood smeared around it all. The veins on her body all looked like they had burst. There were bumps and bruises all over her neck. Her golden hair was highlighted with her black blood. My heart clenched at the sight of her and all that she must have endured. Clarke, my mom is the strongest. She is fearless. And I won't let her die like this.

I shot him in the leg, trying to weaken him but he didn't falter. Pulling the radio off my waistband I kept a strong hand wrapped around the gun. "Room 0032. I need backup. Now."

Bishop's lips curled into a disturbing smile. He slowly limped back towards the wall, dragging Clarke with him. "You're the daughter. Aren't you?" I took a few steps closer, wrapping my other hand around the gun to get a stronger hold. "Of course, you are." He winked at me, the smile growing larger. "I'm sorry to say, but if I go she goes."

The door burst open causing me to slightly jump. I heard Kane, Azuma, Indra, and Miller burst through the door. But their steps immediately stopped as they took in the situation. My eyes remained locked onto Bishop.

"Don't. Please." Kane tried to plead from behind me. But that wouldn't work with Bishop. "We can arrange something. Just let her go."

Bishop let out a hysterical laugh. The anger overtook my body and my gun went off. The gun hitting Bishop right in the side of the chest. As he began to fall he dug his knife into Clarke's neck dragging his knife along her as he fell.


	33. Chapter 33

Time Will Tell

Abby:

As soon as I heard the panic in Jackson's voice I started sprinting up the stairs and towards medical bay. I could feel my legs cramp up, but that wasn't stopping me. I quickly weaved around people standing around in the hallway.

I felt a wave of panic hit me once I made it into the operating room. Bellamy's body was paler than before, his body had become more swollen the bruises on his body had formed rainbows of blue, purple, red, and green.

"We checked his level of serum creatinine in his blood to estimate his glomerular filtration rate. I think we can take his severed kidney out, but I'd like you to check the results." Jackson extended his arm out handing me a tablet reading his results. "He's okay, but he occasionally goes into distress. We need to get him fixed up and start his transfusion quickly or he won't make it."

Jackson rolled out his shoulders and stretched out his arms, it was our ritual before performing a long surgery. "I can help you get started, but we have Octavia coming up too. She has a bullet possibly lodged into her carotid." The corners of his eyes crinkled as he narrowed his eyes at me. Slipping his hands into surgical gloves he simply nodded focusing his attention down on Bellamy.

"10-blade." I slipped some surgical gloves of my own on, quickly grabbing a sterile scalpel and pacing it in his hand. "I need to remove the ureter, adrenal gland, any tissue surrounding the kidney in order to successfully complete a bilateral nephrectomy, right?" He asked as he began to cut into Bellamy's side, giving him a better view of his kidney.

"You need to remove his rib first. Then focus on cutting away any viable blood vessels attached to his kidney. But you know what you're doing Jackson. You don't need my help. I've helped you with procedures like this a dozen times." Jackson peered up at me through his eyelashes. His eyebrows knitting together as he looked back down. Jackson had worked hard in the bunker to become a better doctor. He practiced his techniques, studying diagrams, worked harder on steadying his hands. He worked well under pressure and I know that he will only get better with experience.

"I need suction." I carefully suctioned the blood pooled around Bellamy's kidney. Jackson began to peel back the tissue surrounding the kidney, carefully cutting around any veins and blood vessels. Small beads of sweat formed at the top of his forehead, his entire body grew tenser the closer he got to the outline of Bellamy's kidney. Jackson efficiently tore at Bellamy's liver, occasionally looking up for recognition that he was doing okay.

The door burst open and the apprentices carefully rolled in Octavia. Her body was cold and pale. "I'm going to need general anesthesia, blood bags, epinephrine, lots of lap pads, forceps, suction, a 10-blade, sutures, sharp-sharp scissors, and plenty of clamps." The apprentices quickly ran around the room, setting up the surgical tray. Considering everything goes right and Bellamy doesn't have any deficits from this surgery he should be fine. Right now, I need to focus on Octavia. If we lose Octavia we would lose everything we worked to build.

Once the tray was set up I pulled on a new set of gloves. The anesthesiologist quickly put Octavia under as I set up the bags to start the transfusion. "Okay, we don't know how severely this bullet is lodged into her neck so you both need to be prepared. I need you to suction and I need you to be ready with the clamps. If her carotid is compromised we'll need to clamp down on it to stop the bleeding long enough for me to stitch it up."

The apprentices quickly picked up their instruments, a determined look on their faces. Once they looked fully prepared I picked up the forceps, carefully pulling out the bullet. As soon as the bullet was removed her blood burst through her wound. The blood splattering on everyone's face, running down Octavia's neck. "Suction the excess blood." The intern turned on his instrument, suctioning away the blood giving us a clear view of the torn carotid. I let out a deep sigh of relief. It was a minor tear. "Clamp down on either side of the tear. Leave me enough room to stitch it up." The boy carefully set clamps around her tear, supporting the clamps up with lap pads.

I began to scrape out some plaque from inside the artery. I picked up the needle carefully weaving in and out of her artery. "The stitches need to be absorbable so that we won't need to take them out later. They'll eventually lose their strength, but I'm hoping they'll hold out until she recovers." The apprentices carefully watched as I finished stitching together her artery. But the only way any of that would matter would be if she wakes up after all of this. I tightened the last few stitches carefully tying all the loose ends. "Now I need you to carefully remove the clamps. If her stitches hold, we're in the clear, but if they don't we need to be prepared."

We all let out a deep breath. This was the moment of truth. The boy carefully unclamped the artery from both sides, the blood immediately rushing through her body. There was a large wave of relief amongst the room. The stitches were holding up, but waking up was on her. Octavia is strong, she's been through worse. This trauma won't hold her back. I know it. I quickly stitched up her neck, wrapping up her stitches with some gauze. "You two start looking into her other bullet wounds. Her vitals seem to be strong so there shouldn't be any major issues."

I turned towards Jackson, working on Bellamy. He was working quickly his nimble fingers swiftly weaving in and out as he worked on cutting away from the kidney, preparing for the removal of the kidney. I cleared my throat, Jackson's eyes darting up to meet mine. "Do you need any help?" He shook his head looking back down.

"Dr. Griffin, this bullet hit her pelvis I think she may have a fracture." I turned back towards Octavia's body, the apprentices already cauterized three of her other bullet wounds each wound was being carefully wrapped up. The apprentice suctioned some blood out of the way to give me a clearer view of her pelvis, a part of the bullet still half lodged into her pelvis. "See that." He pointed at a small fracture on her iliac crest.

"It's just an iliac wing fracture. She'll be in a lot of pain, but she'll be okay." I picked up some forceps and continued to pull out the remaining pieces of bullets floating around her pelvis. Once we cleared out all the remains I cauterized her wound. "Put her in the room we cleared for her."

I ripped off my gloves and surgical gown. Once I whipped off those gloves a huge wave of emotions took over me. I leaned down placing my hands on my knees, trying to control my breathing. Bellamy was still in critical condition, Octavia has the chance of not waking up at all, and Clarke is still unaccounted for. My breathing became heavier. "Put your head between your knees." Jackson looked over at me, a look of concern in his eyes. I sat on the floor, hot tears rolling down my cheeks, the cold floor beneath me sending chills throughout my body.

As soon as I got a grip of myself the door swung open. Marcus came rushing into the room with Azuma, both of them dragging a man in by his shoulders. They threw him on the surgical table. "It's Bishop. Madi shot him in the chest. We need you to fix him. I won't let him die so easily."

"Clarke. Where's Clarke?" Marcus looked down at me on the floor, a hesitation in his eyes. He looked over at Azuma, exchanging a look.

"We need you to fix Bishop. Clarke is still unaccounted for." His eyes became glossy, a distinct tension growing on his face. "Don't let him die like this, Abby." With that Marcus and Azuma cleared out of the room. A distinct anger amongst everyone in the room. It's true. Bishop deserved to suffer for everything he did. It's because of him that we had to endure so much.

Raven:

I made my way over to Murphy and Emori in the corner of medical. Emori had her hand tightly gripped around Murphy's a teary-eyed smile on her face once she saw me. Murphy turned his head towards me a tight smirk on his face. "Look who saves the day again."

I rolled my eyes at him. Emori let out a light laugh. "Thank you, Raven." She reached out squeezing my hand. "I don't know what I would've done if he didn't make it."

"Probably rip off Alexandra's head." There was an exchange of laughter, a calming feeling setting in amongst the three of us. Murphy's face fell as a realization hit him. He slightly pushed himself up, a groan slipping out.

I pushed him back down by his shoulders. Emori pushed him back down from the other side. "No. I didn't spend three hours trying to fix your lungs for you to just abuse them."

He rolled his eyes lying back, letting out a deep breath. His eyes widened and he swung his head around looking around the room. "Where's Madi? Is she okay? Who else was hurt?" His voice was filled with complete panic, completely unlike Murphy.

Emori squeezed his arm, rubbing him with her thumb. "Madi's fine. She went with Azuma, Kane, and Indra to look for Clarke." Murphy's eyebrows rose carefully drawing together. The anger taking over his face.

"You let her go back out there? What if Bishop has a gun? If anything happens to her I swear," he yelled. He balled his hands up into tight fists, his breathing growing heavier. He closed his eyes taking a few deep breaths to relax. "Who else is hurt? Did you find Bellamy?"

I looked over to Emori, her eyes glistened as she stared up at me. "Octavia and Monty were shot. Monty is okay, but Octavia is still in surgery. Bellamy was in there with Alexandra. Bellamy's in critical condition." I could see the anger in Murphy's eyes shift to disappointment. I placed my hand on his shoulder.

"What did that bitch do to Bellamy?" Murphy moved himself up, leaning his back against the wall. He looked back and forth between Emori and me.

"She wasn't the one who hurt Bellamy, that was all Bishop. But she did shoot you all." Murphy rolled his eyes. He had every right to be angry. He was going to be stuck on bed rest for a few weeks. I grabbed his hand giving it a light squeeze. "Get some rest." He weakly smiled at me as I left. Emori rested her head at Murphy's side, his fingers running through her hair.

Some boys rolled Octavia out on a gurney. She lied there, the olive undertone to her skin coming back from her once cold and pale body. Octavia was covered in bandages. The boys lead her out towards one of the private rooms. I made my way behind them. Once they got into the room the boy turned towards me pushing me up against a wall. "We're under strict orders. No one is allowed to disturb the commander."

I let out a heavy laugh pushing him back into the room. He stumbled back, his eyes widened as he stared down at me. The other boy stepped up behind him, his shoulders held out wide. "You better move out of my way before I rip out your trachea right out of your neck." The boy took another step back, his hand moving up wrapping around his neck defensively. "My name is Raven Reyes. I'm part of the council, head of engineering and mechanics, but most importantly I'm her family. So, I'd move out of my way if I were you."

" _You're_ Raven Reyes?" Their eyes widened as they looked me up and down. The boy cautiously backed out of my way, exchanging a feared look with the other boy. They carefully placed her on the bed hooking her up to a bag of blood and a machine to read her vitals off.

The other boy cleared his throat nervously. "We're supposed to wait 45 minutes before trying to wake her up." The boy looked up at me through his lashes, his head hanging low, a fearful look on his face. He shifted his weight from one foot to another, carefully moving closer to the other boy. "Can you tell us if she wakes up?"

"Sure." I pulled up a stool at Octavia's side, pulling her hand into mine. The boys slowly left the room, the door quietly closing behind them. I started rubbing Octavia's cold hands, warming her up. "You know becoming a human shield was probably one of your worst ideas yet." I let out a nervous laugh. "But if it were me and I knew Madi was behind me, I'd do the same thing." A tear slipped down my cheek and onto her hand. I wiped it away. "But I guess you should be grateful that none of those bullets paralyzed you, right?" I laughed again trying to blink away the tears.

Octavia and I hadn't been close before, but now it was different. We were family. We had an unspoken understanding of each other, a mutual respect. Things had changed a lot since we all got back together. We confided in each other. She had become one of my best friends.

I was pulled from my thoughts when the door swung open, Azuma rushing in cupping Octavia's face in his hands. His eyes were wide with fear, his mouth slightly open, and his breathing heavy. "Is she okay?" He looked over at me, his round eyes were dark almost a mocha color.

"We won't officially know until she wakes up, but for now her vitals are stable and they've fixed all her wounds." He stiffened, slouching over Octavia's body. I stood up pushing my stool towards him. He gratefully nodded taking a seat beside her, his hand wrapped around hers.

Azuma, like most of the once known grounders, was very good at hiding his emotions, ruthless, strong. But around Octavia he was different, he was softer, more caring. They were good for each other. Azuma kept her balanced.

Placing a hand on his shoulder I gave him a reassuring smile. "Stay with her. Did you guys find..."

Madi burst through the door, tears streaming down her face. She ran in, her arms wrapping around my waist. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders softly rubbing her shoulders. "Raven." She began to sob; her eyes were swollen. "Clarke. You need to help her."

Kane stepped up behind her placing his hands on her back. "We need you to do surgery on Clarke." His eyes were wide, his lips pressed into a hard line. "Jackson is working on Bellamy. Abby can't do it right now. I don't trust Alexandra and I know you're equipped to get things started until Jackson can join you."

"Why can't Abby do it? I'm not a surgeon Kane and this is Clarke we're talking about." Sure, I learned a thing or two about it but I'm not a surgeon. The only reason I could help Murphy was that I had seen Abby do it before. Kane waved me out of the room and towards another operating room, Clarke was laid on the table Indra pressing lap pads into her neck.

"Abby doesn't know we have her yet. We couldn't tell her. Just please." I put my hand up stopping him from saying anything else. I get it. Indra looked up at me, a hard look on her face.

"Send in Emori and as many apprentices as you can get. I'm going to need a lot of hands." Kane stormed out doing as I said. I made my way towards Clarke's side. Her face almost as pale as winter in Azgeda. I picked up Clarke's wrist, blood pooling out of the cuts across her arms. Her wrist was cold, her pulse faint. "Indra, I need you to apply pressure harder." She pressed the rest of her weight into Clarke's neck, the pulse increasing under my fingers. "Good."

Emori stormed into the room followed by a few other apprentices. Surprisingly enough Echo was among them, ducking her head as she walked in. Emori's entire face falling at the sight of Clarke's lifeless body. All of us owed our lives to Clarke. We spent months mourning her and once her voice came across the radios of the Ark ring the environment completely changed. Everyone was happier, everyone worked harder, everyone was more determined. We'll fight as long and as hard as we can for Clarke because that's all she's ever done for us.

My eyes shifted back to Clarke's face, I brushed some hair out of her face. Clearing my throat, I brought everyone's attention back to me. "Okay, I need full trays of equipment. Lap pads, retractors, suction, equipment for sutures, etc." The apprentices quickly ran around the room setting up the trays. "I need blood bags, anesthesia, and epi. We need something to cauterize all these cuts too." They weren't deep enough to need stitches, just deep enough to make sure she felt the pain. They could easily be fixed with some cauterization.

Emori and Echo stood in front of me, worried looks on their faces. "You think we can bring her back from this?" Emori whispered, her eyes shooting back and forth from my face to Clarke's body. I could see her entire body tense. Echo's eyes glimmered with tears, but she blinked them away.

"We have to." Everyone surrounded Clarke, ready with their gloves, gowns, and masks, eager to get to work. I slipped into a mask, gown, and some surgical gloves before turning towards the rest of the group once again. "Emori you get her thigh. Start with muscle repair and work your way up. Make sure all major arteries are intact. Echo you need to cauterize any deep cuts on her stomach and arms. If it's not deep, bandage it. I will work on whatever Indra is applying pressure to. If you're an apprentice divide yourself among these three areas. It's going to be a long ride."

Everyone quickly divided themselves. Emori giving different directions to different apprentices. Echo began heating up a sterilized blade to cauterize her cuts. My apprentices stood in front of me eager to get to work.

"One of you needs to suction, one of you needs to be ready with lap pads, and one of you needs to be prepared to clamp down any arteries that may be ruptured." They all grabbed their equipment, ready to take down anything that comes their way. I turned to Indra giving her a nod to take her hands off her neck.

She slowly removed her hands, black blood pouring out of her neck. There was a long laceration from the middle of her neck out to the side. "He missed the major veins." Everyone let out a deep sigh. "I need some disinfectant and some gauze. We'll clean the surrounding tissue, stitch her up, and bandage her."

"She's going to be okay?" I looked towards the door to see Madi standing in the doorway. A tear slipping down her cheek. She sniffled, taking a few steps inside.

"We hope so." She ran to my side squeezing the life out of me as I disinfected Clarke's wound. Madi's face was buried into my side. Her tears soaking through my shirt, an occasional muffled sniffle into my side. I leaned my head down pressing a kiss into her beanie. "Go into Octavia's room, for now, she needs you right now. We'll bring her out as soon as we're done." She squeezed me a little tighter before pulling away, wiping the tears off her face.

I continued to silently stitch Clarke's neck up. The apprentices carefully watched. I occasionally pressed my fingers into her neck to check her pulse, growing stronger by the minute. The color slowly began to come back to her face.

"Raven, there's a lot of blood here and I don't know where it's coming from." Echo looked panicked as she looked into Clarke's stomach. I pushed past the others standing beside Echo.

I took a set of forceps, pushing through to get a better view of everything. "I need suction, right here." There was a minor tear in the wall of Clarke's stomach. "Sutures." I quickly weaved through the wall of her stomach repairing the tear. The bleeding coming to a stop. It's much harder to see things with black blood. "It was a minor tear. Good looking Echo."

I continued down to Emori's side. She was working hard at fixing the torn muscles. Looking up through her lashes. "She's lucky he didn't hit any arteries or bone with the depth of this cut." Her hands swiftly moved through her thigh, disinfecting the tissue of her muscles.

"Her muscles will regenerate themselves. If there are no significant bleeders, then you should disinfect all tissue and stitch her up. The sooner you do that, the sooner her muscles will start to recover." Jackson made his way through the door, his eyes narrowed onto Clarke's body. His eyes running along every cut on her body. "Now I see why Kane didn't want Abby in here." He swallowed a large lump in his throat. He slipped his hands into some gloves.

"Is Bellamy okay?" Jackson anxiously shifted his weight from one side to the other. There was a slight disappointment in his eyes. I could feel my stomach knot. Emori's eyes began to tear up as she waited for Jackson to respond. There was a wave of tension amongst everyone in the room.

"His vitals are good. We fixed all his internal wounds, but there's not knowing if everything is okay until he wakes up." He focused his attention down to the bandages all of Clarke's body. He gently peeled off part of the bandage on her neck, running his fingers along the stitches on her neck. "These are beautiful sutures. It looks like you didn't need me after all."

He continued down checking under every bandage. He nodded after checking every bandage to confirm that it would be okay. "Seems like you three have it all under control." He stood beside Emori as she stitched up the gash on Clarke's thigh. "If you three want to join Octavia and Bellamy, I can finish this up for you."

Emori, Echo, and I exchanged a look. "Thank you." I ripped the gloves off my hands. A huge wave of relief hitting me like praimfaya.

I slipped out of the door to see Kane holding Abby back. Abby crying hysterically, trying to push past Kane. "I need to see my daughter. How dare you have me operate on the man who tortured her without telling me she was here and hurt." Once her eyes landed on me, Emori, and Echo she stopped yelling. The tears streaming down her face, her face a dark shade of red to match the bursting veins around her eyes. Her eyes widened. Kane looked up his eyes hopeful as he held Abby. "Where's Clarke? What happened?"

Emori and Echo's faces fell, pulling more cries out of Abby. I quickly jumped in pulling her into an embrace. Running my hands through her hair. "She's okay. Clarke will be okay." Abby's body began to shake, she pulled away looking up at me. Her bottom lip pushed out a harsh frown on her face. "She's strong. Just like her mother." Her frown was replaced with a sad smile, tears of sadness now became tears of joy. "Jackson is just stitching her up and then you can see her."

She pulled me into a tighter hug, her tears seeping through the neck of my shirt. "Thank you, Raven." I rubbed the back of her head once more humming in response. Abby had already had to live 6 years without her daughter, if she had lost her now she would never forgive herself.

Kane placed his hand on Abby's waist, gently pulling her away. Abby gave my shoulders a soft squeeze, a weak smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. Kane rubbed the small of Abby's back, she leaned into his chest. "Thank you, Raven." Kane nodded at me, a proud look on his face.

I quietly turned making my way towards Octavia and Bellamy's room. Walking into the door Madi was curled up at the side of Bellamy's bed, her head resting on the edge. Her face was soft, her long dark hair falling into her face, her beanie fallen at her side. Her snores echoed throughout the room. Azuma was asleep slouched in a chair, his head thrown back. His breathing was heavy.

I pulled a cot out of the supply closet placing it in the corner of the room. Placing some pillows and blankets on the cot I quietly made my way towards Madi. I carefully lifted Madi up, she stirred in my arms carefully leaning her head against my chest. Setting her down I tucked her in, wrapping her up in the soft fur blanket.

Before I could walk away Madi grabbed my hand. "Can you sleep with me?" I curled up behind her, brushing her hair with my hands. She pulled my hand around her waist. I slipped under the covers, continuing to brush my fingers through her hair. "Do you think they'll be okay?"

I felt hesitant. She looked at me over her shoulder, tears pooled in her eyes. "We did everything we could. Now, all we can do is be here for them and hope."

A tear slipped down her cheek. I tightened my grip around her, pressing a kiss to her top of her head. She placed her arms on top of mine. "What if they don't make it?"

"They _will_ make it." She hummed, the sound vibrating through her body. "Until then we'll take care of you. You're not alone." She let out a sigh, her entire body relaxing in front of me. After a few minutes, her breathing became heavier, soft snores slipping out occasionally.

The door slowly opened, the light beaming into the room. Jackson backed up into the room pulling Clarke's bed behind him. I got up carefully making sure Madi didn't wake up. Reaching out I helped him set her in beside Bellamy. As I tucked her in with some more fur blankets Jackson set up her vital machines.

"It looks like she'll be okay, but we'll know more when she's awake." Jackson made his way over to Bellamy, checking his vitals manually. Then he makes his way over to Octavia checking her vitals too. "I sent Abby and Kane up to get some sleep. Murphy, Monty, Harper, Miller, and Emori are camped out right outside those doors if you need anything. Radio them if they wake up. I think Octavia was given some Propofol so she should wake up sometime soon."

I nodded taking a seat beside Octavia's bed, taking her hand in mine. Jackson does a last check around the room before silently leaving, quietly closing the door behind him. I lean my head down resting it against Octavia's hand. She needs to wake up, they all do. This is all becoming so overwhelming. Octavia, Bellamy, and Clarke mean too much to this camp. Without them, I don't know if we'll survive. I could feel my body slowly shutting down, the weight of my eyelids growing heavier by the second. I rested my head against Octavia's hand. If I close my eyes for a few seconds maybe I'll feel better.

Octavia:

I woke up to a sharp pain shooting up and down my body. The pain was overwhelming, almost breathtaking. I fluttered my eyes open to a dark room. Machines whirring around the room. Once I could hold my eyelids open I looked around the room. Raven was asleep at my side, her hand tightly clasped around mine. On the other side, Azuma laid back in a clearly uncomfortable chair. His heavy breathing making it clear he's barely gotten any sleep.

At the foot of my bed, there was an empty cot, I looked around the room to see Madi standing beside someone else's bed. My blurry vision made it hard to see anything with overwhelming darkness. A groan slipped my lips as I tried to take a deep breath. Madi quickly spun around a large smile on her face.

She quickly took a few steps forward shaking Raven awake. "She's awake. She's awake." She ran around to the other side of the bed, waking Azuma up in a hurry before wrapping her warm arms around me. Azuma's eyes burst wide open. His body immediately tensed as he scanned the room, once he caught a glimpse of me he immediately jumped up standing behind Madi. "I'm sorry."

I rubbed Madi's back, the warmth from her body sent chills down my spine. A tear slipped down her face, I wiped it away giving her a weak smile. "Come here." I scooted over, patting the empty mattress beside me. She carefully got up curling up beside me. The heat from her body was comforting. "Remember what I said? A warrior doesn't dwell on something she can't control. You couldn't have known what was going to happen." I cupped her cheek in the palm of my hand, earning me a beautiful wide-eyed smile.

Raven rested her hand on my forearm, a soft smile on her face. "I'm glad you're okay." She rubbed my arm with her thumb. Once she realized how cold I was she jumped up. "You're freezing. Let me get you more blankets."

As she made her way to the closet I caught a glimpse of Azuma smiling down at me. A large smile on his face. I extended my hand out to him. He placed his hand in mine, immediately he began rubbing my hand. "Bishop should be grateful you're alive. If you didn't make it I was going to make his life a living hell."

I rolled my eyes, weakly laughing. Groans leaving my mouth as the laughter made my entire body ache. "Take it easy. You may have survived, but you're going to need a lot of rest to recover from all the trauma." She quickly threw another blanket on top of me, tucking it in at my sides. Madi curled in closer, burying her face beneath the sheets. "I need to radio Jackson. He told me there were some tests that needed to be done once you woke up."

Raven quickly made her way out of the room. It didn't take long for Madi to fall asleep, her snores muffled by the layers of blankets. "Where's Bellamy and Clarke? Did you find them? Are they okay?"

Azuma gestured to the beds beside me. "They're as okay as they can be right now." He made his way to my side of the bed, carefully placing a kiss to my forehead. He pulled up a stool taking a seat beside me. "Bishop had them. He let Bellamy go because Clarke convinced him that he would be useless, but he didn't let him go without nearly killing him." I felt my heart drop. I will have Bishop's head on a pretty little platter and I'll serve it to his people for breakfast, lunch, and dinner until they die. Azuma grabbed my hand, squeezing it softly. "He left Alexandra and Bellamy alone in a room, the room we raided. Alexandra thought we were Bishop's men so she closed her eyes and just kept shooting." I felt my blood pump faster, the heat of my anger burning through the palms of my hands. "She was trying to protect Bellamy." The lump in my throat grew, the tears welling up in my eyes. I wanted to break down and cry, but this was no time to be weak. The war isn't over until I have Bishop's head. "Madi went through the vents to find Clarke and when she did Bishop was about to kill her. So, Madi shot him."

I couldn't hide the smile on my face. I leaned down placing a kiss to Madi's head. "That's my girl." Azuma let out a soft chuckle. The sound of his laugh lightening my mood completely. "You didn't let Bishop die like that did you?" Azuma knowingly shook his head, a smirk tugging at a corner of his mouth. "Good. I promise when I'm recovered I will rip his heart out of his chest."

"I second that," Raven laughed making her way back into the room. "I've got a few good ideas for how we're going to torture him. I think it should be a group effort."

"What do you have in mind?" She raised an eyebrow, her fingers rubbing against her chin as she contemplated where to start. A large smile grew on her face.

"Well, Emori says she wants to skin him. Murphy says he wants to rip off all his fingers. Miller wants to tear him limb from limb. I want to electrocute him until his insides all catch on fire." I felt my insides twist at the thought of doing that, but it was Bishop. Bishop deserves to rot.

"Blood must have blood. Right?" We all let out a weak laugh. My sides aching with pain at the flexing of my muscles. "We can't do anything until I know Bellamy and Clarke will be okay. Bishop will rot for this, but Bellamy and Clarke have been hurt the most because of him. This is eternally their kill. They will decide what happens."

"Up, awake, and planning revenge. Sounds like the commander we all know and love." Miller peered through the door, turning his head back towards the door. He held the door open. Monty, Murphy, Emori, and Harper all following in closely behind him. Each of them made their way giving me a soft hug, cautious not to hurt me or to wake him Madi.

"How are you feeling?" Miller squeezed my toes, a tired smile on his face. In the bunker, Miller was one of the few people I had confided in. He had become close to me, closer than we'd ever been. Being two of the only delinquents in the bunker we shared a special bond.

"My body feels like it's going to explode, but I guess I'm alright." Everyone laughed around the room. A lighthearted laugh, cynical humor had become our thing. Laughing at our pain rather than letting it take over you. "How long have you guys been out there?"

"We've been out there since you were in surgery." Murphy slightly pushed himself up in his wheelchair, letting out a groan. He was bandaged up too, clearly hurt from Alexandra's rampage.

"How did you two get shot? I thought I was blocking out the rest of the doorway?" Monty groaned slightly, his eyes squeezing tightly. Harper leaned down to help him sit properly.

"You took the first 5 shots, but three slipped up. One hitting Murphy, one hitting Monty, and one skimming Madi's shoulder." Raven brushed some hair out of Madi's face. "I must say commander; the human shield was probably your worst defensive technique."

I held back the laughter to avoid the pain that came with it. My body was slowly growing heavier, my eyes getting heavier. Just as my eyes were beginning the flicker Jackson rushed through the door of our room. "Thank god you're okay." He shooed everyone to the side. They all took seats on the cot at the foot of my bed, carefully watching Jackson as he began to check me. First, he wrapped his hands around my wrist checking my pulse, followed by a check of my heart rate. After that, he pulled out a stethoscope and a thermometer. "Seems like you don't have a fever, which means no infection. But you do have a long recovery ahead of you. A bullet left a hairline fracture in your pelvis, so you'll need to rest until that's healed."

"I'm the commander. I can't just be on bedrest." Jackson rolled his eyes at me, a sarcastic smile on his face.

"You can't be the commander with a busted hip and 5 healing bullet wounds either. If anything happens, we'll have it taken care of." He squeezed my hand before turning towards everyone sitting on the cot. "I'll have them send in cots for all of you because clearly, you aren't going anywhere."

Everyone exchanged laughter a calm feeling moving throughout the room. Some guards brought in cots setting them up side by side all around the room. Leaving minimal room for anyone to walk around. Azuma laid his cot at my side. Raven laid on a cot between Bellamy and me. Beside Raven laid Miller. Between Bellamy and Clarke Emori and Murphy laid on their cot. Harper and Monty laid on cots at the foots of our beds.

My body grew heavier, the pain growing insufficient to the overbearing exhaustion taking over my body. I relaxed my body, leaning my head closer to Madi. All we could do for now was hope that Bellamy and Clarke would wake up in the morning.


	34. Chapter 34

**It's Okay**

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up in a large dark room, the only sound echoing through my ears was the sound of my heart pounding in my chest. I felt absolutely paralyzed, incapable to move. Sweat dripped down my forehead. I wanted to speak, but all I could manage to get out of my mouth was a loud groan.

"Bellamy. It's okay. You're okay. We're all here." Raven stood above me, her hands tightly gripped around my shoulders. I wanted to move, but I couldn't. All I could do was cry. My tears dripping down the sides of my face and into my hair. Raven rubbed away my tears, a large smile on her face. "Someone radio Jackson." She shot a glare at someone. A wrinkle forming in the middle of her forehead.

Once she brought her attention back to me, her eyes lightened back up with a soft smile. She rubbed my hair out of my face. Rubbing some sweat off my forehead. Her eyes widened, immediately she began checking my eyes spreading them wide open with her fingers. "Turn on the lights." She pulled out a flashlight flashing it into my eyes. My throat became dry, too dry to say anything. Raven moved out of my line of sight, but I could feel her moving the blankets off my body. Running her hands along the areas of my body I felt the sharpest pain.

I tried to speak again, but could only manage to mumble and moan with pain. Every part of my body felt extremely heavy, too heavy to hold. Every limb felt like it was going to combust from the pain. Tears continued running down the sides of my face, another figure moved into my view.

Madi. She had a large smile on her face, her hair falling gracefully around her face without her beanie holding it back. Beside her stood Murphy, his arm carefully draped around her shoulders. Behind him, Emori stood with a wide smile on her face. On the other side of me stood Monty, Harper, and Miller. Their faces full of relief.

I wanted to smile, but I couldn't. The only thing I could do was look and see everyone. As they stared down at me all I wanted to do was ask where the hell Clarke was. My eyes ran around looking at everyone's face present except Octavia's. My heart clenched, anger rushing through me but I couldn't do anything to stop it.

Madi leaned down hugging me, her arms gently wrapped around my sides. I tried to lift my arms to wrap them around her, but I couldn't. "I'm so glad you're okay," she mumbled into my shirt. I could feel the tears from her eyes seeping through my shirt, but I couldn't do anything about it.

She looked up at me, a hint of sadness in her eyes. Her big round emerald eyes drowning in a sea of blood. Her cheeks were rosy, slightly swollen like they always got when she had cried. Murphy squeezed her shoulder pulling her slightly back. "You look terrible." Murphy laughed, everyone around my bed responding with smiles and light laughter. I tried to curl my lips into a smile, but it was hopeless.

All I could manage was to groan at him. Miller rested his hand on the edge of my bed leaning down beside me. "I know you're probably in a lot of pain right now. But I also know exactly what you're thinking. Yes, Clarke is okay and so is Octavia. Everyone is okay." I felt my face twitch into a relieved smile, tears streamed down my face.

Knowing they were okay, gave me a drive, motivation. I picked up my arm, holding it out towards Madi. She placed her hand in mine, using the other to support the weight of my arm. I cleared my throat, the lump in my throat too stubborn to move anywhere. "Where are they?" The words were a whisper, barely distinguishable. My voice even deeper than its normal tone.

Everyone moved out of the way, gesturing to either side of me. I threw my head to one side to see Octavia fast asleep beside me, machines hooked onto her checking her vitals and pumping her with blood. The weight of my head was overwhelming, but I still managed to throw it in the other direction to see Clarke lying on a bed beside me. Her chest rising and falling slowly, the parts of her face I could see were covered in bruises. My stomach began to knot up at the sight of her.

"Bishop did a number on her, but we think she'll be okay." I turned my head back towards everyone else. Raven was now standing beside me, a sad smile on her face.

Emori stepped up behind Raven, placing her hands on her shoulders. Raven slightly winced under her touch but remained calm. "Raven here saved Clarke's life." Raven weakly smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Emori helped too." She placed a hand on top of Emori's. "And Echo." Her eyes shifted around the room looking at everyone's faces awkwardly. Ever since we got back to Earth Echo has kept an awkward distance from the rest of us, rekindling her relationships with former Azgeda warriors that had lived in the bunker.

"Seems like Bellamy has a minor fever, but with some rest, he should be okay." Jackson wrapped his hand around my leg carefully squeezing. He made his way up to my side with a syringe in his hand. "Right now, you'll feel weak, too weak to move or talk. You need to rest, eat and drink to gain some strength. But for now, if you need anything I'm sure any of them will help you." He gestured towards Madi, Raven, Murphy, Monty, Miller, Harper, and Emori. He pierced the syringe through a tube connecting to me, the fluids slowly entering my body. "If you feel any pain let someone know. I just gave you something for the pain so you should feel a little more relieved." His eyes slightly lightened at the idea. I need some pain killers because at this rate I'll never get out of here. "And before you ask, Octavia is okay. She took a few bullet wounds, but the only real issue she may have is with her fractured pelvis. She'll be stuck here on bedrest right with you." I felt a partial weight lift off my shoulders at the thought that Octavia would be stuck here by my side and that she'd be here recovering with me.

"Clarke," I mumbled, my voice grew a little louder but it was still very low and husky. Jackson looked over at Clarke's limp body, a sad look in his eyes.

"I don't know yet. We won't know until she wakes up. She has a fever, but no other signs of infection. If it doesn't go away I'm going to have to open her back up to disinfect everything again." His eyes fell to his hands, his fingers fiddling with one another. When he looked back up at me his eyes were glossy from unshed tears. "I'm just going to pull up a cot outside so it'll be easier if any of you need me." He nods his head before turning back towards the door and quietly leaving.

Raven made her way towards me as everyone headed back to their cots all scattered around the room. She tilted her head to the right staring down at me, her eyes filled with sympathy. "Get some sleep." She tucked me back in, quietly out a word she laid down on a cot beside me. The lights flickered back off, the darkness becoming overwhelming.

Whatever Jackson used on me was working quickly. I could already feel my body feeling fuzzy, the pain drifting away. But I also felt my eyelids growing heavier and breathing getting deeper. My entire body slipped into a state of paralysis. Every part of my body completely numb, like it didn't exist. My eyes felt heavier, slowly flickering slowly before I gave into the darkness falling back into a deep sleep.

 **Murphy:**

I wake up to the feeling of my cot moving. Opening my eyes to see Raven rubbing her knee as she made her way back around Bellamy's bed, carefully tucking the blankets underneath his legs and checking his vitals. I made my way behind her placing a hand on her shoulder. "Get some rest. You've been waking up and checking all of them every hour. Let me do it." Her muscles relaxed underneath the weight of my hand, a sigh slipping through her lips.

She turned towards me, her eyes swollen from the mix of tears and lack of sleep. Her eyes were red and puffy, bags forming under her eyes. I nudged her towards her cot, taking the stethoscope from around her neck. "Do you even know how to check them?"

I rolled my eyes pushing her shoulders to make her sit down. "I worked with Abby in medical more than I'd like to admit. I've picked up enough." She laid back, her small figure curling up into a ball behind Madi as she pulled the fur blankets on top of herself. She wrapped her arms around Madi, a satisfied hum vibrating in her chest.

Raven and I had a complicated relationship. She's been there for me through everything. She's forgiven me for more things that I still haven't been able to forgive myself for. She's saved my life in more ways than one. I love her. But I know I can't have her. I know I can't let her love me knowing what I've done to her. She deserves better, she deserves the best. The only way I can love her is as my best friend because that's all I'll ever be to her. I don't deserve her.

I pulled my eyes away from her turning back towards Bellamy. I checked his blood pressure, his heart rate sounding steady. His pulse was strong and his temperature seemed even. I tucked him in further, he let out a slight groan but he went back to sleep. I made my way over to Octavia. Her eyes flickered open as she watched me check her bandages, replacing the ones that needed to be replaced. "Has Bellamy or Clarke woken up?" she whispered.

"Bellamy did but he's in a lot of pain. He could barely move or talk. Jackson says he'll be okay though. His fever has gone down now." Octavia's eyes darted around the room as she felt the empty space beside her. "Madi is sleeping, Raven. She didn't want to wake you up while she slipped back into bed."

Octavia spread herself out across the bed, pulling the blankets in tighter. "Shouldn't Clarke have woken up by now?" There was a sad look in her eyes, disappointment. She leaned herself up on her elbows looking over at Bellamy and Clarke lying beside her.

Pressing her shoulders back against the bed I carefully tucked her back in. "She should, but it's not looking too good. She has a fever and she's been unresponsive to everything." Octavia's eyes widened as she turned her head to look back over in Clarke's direction.

Azuma woke up, his legs quickly swinging over the side of the cot. He sat up rubbing his eyes, his hand landing on the edge of Octavia's bed. "Are you okay?"

Octavia turned back towards him, flashing a smile in his direction. "I've been better." She tried to shift her weight to her side, but let out a little groan from the pain. "Murphy, you know how long I'm going to be tied down to this bed?"

"I'd get used to it, it's going to be a while. No way anyone's going to let you walk around on a fractured hip. Especially not Clar..." I stopped myself. A sad look crossing all of our faces as we looked back over at her.

I turned making my way to her side. Her eyes flickered beneath her lids, but they remained shut. Moving some hair out of her face I ran my fingers along the scars on her face, her face twitched under my fingers. "Clarke." I lightly shook her shoulders. "Clarke. Wake up." I felt hopeless, but she moved her face. She has to wake up. She has to get better. Octavia sat up in her bed looking over at me, Azuma's body tensing as he took a few steps towards Octavia's bed supporting her back as she was sitting up. "Her eyes flickered, and her face moved. I swear."

Octavia tilted her head to the side wordlessly staring at me. Azuma found his way to my side, his eyes focused on Clarke. I ran my fingers along the scars on her face again, her face twitching again. His jaw dropped at the sight of it. His head turned towards Octavia a slight nod in her direction.

As soon as I brought my eyes back to Clarke she began to seize. The machines began beeping loudly, waking everyone up in the room. "Turn her on her side." Azuma helped me support her as we tilted her to her side, carefully holding her. Everyone surrounded her bed, wide eyes and open mouths across everyone's faces. I wiped the foam pouring out of her mouth with the sleeve of my shirt. "Get Jackson. Now." The foam slowly turned black, her blood pouring out of her mouth.

As Jackson rushed in her seizing stopped, but the blood continued to pour out of her mouth. Everyone moved out his way carefully watching him as he checked her. "We don't have time. She still has a fever and she just seized. She doesn't have an infection she has a blood clot." As the words rushed out of his mouth the machine hooked onto Clarke flatlined, the beeping of it filling the room.

I could hear Bellamy struggling to get up, but Monty and Miller rushed over to hold him down. Azuma rushed over to Octavia's side keeping her in place as well. Jackson quickly ripped the blanket off of Clarke, pulling off all of her bandages checking for any significant changes.

"Start compressions. Now," he yelled. I quickly began pressing all my weight into her chest while Raven used a mask to send oxygen into her body. Jackson slipped into gloves and a gown pulling out surgical equipment from drawers around the room. Emori grabbed Madi by the shoulders sitting her down in the corner of the room away from all the chaos.

"Murphy, I need you to massage her heart while I look for the clot." My head shot up at him, he was serious. "Now." He took a scalpel cutting into her chest. He placed a large metal spacer to spread out her chest, revealing her heart. It was black, barely twitching. I slipped a glove before digging my hand into her chest, carefully wrapping my hand around her fragile heart.

"Check her stomach first. I had to stitch up her stomach." Raven stood beside Jackson pointing at the bandage on her stomach. There was dead silence around the room, I could feel everyone's eyes on us but I kept massaging her heart. The beeping of the machine sounding normal like it did before.

I watched as Jackson ran his hands through Clarke's body, cutting through the stitches on her stomach. There was panic in his eyes when he couldn't find it. The door swung open, Abby rushing through the door tears streaming down her face as she stared at Clarke's limp body. She pulled some gloves out of her pocket, immediately placing her hands on them.

Wiping her tears away with the back of her wrist she stood by my side, her eyes focused on Clarke. "What do you need?"

Jackson and Raven exchanged a sad look, guilt on both of their faces. "She had a fever and a seizure with blood coming from her mouth. I think she has a clot." Jackson began stitching her stomach back up, Raven stood beside him carefully handing him any instruments he asked for.

Abby cut through the stitches on her neck, clumps of blood pouring out of her neck. "Suction. I need lots of suction." Raven froze as she picked up the suction staring down at the clumps pooled up at the base of Clarke's neck. Tears built-up in her eyes. Guilt, pure guilt in her face. Abby took the instrument from Raven's hand, disposing of the clumps. "How long has she had a fever and how long has her blood pressure been this high?" When no one answered she looked up, almost yelling. "How long? Lack of oxygen to the brain could cause major deficits." Blood poured down Clarke's nose, her eyes flickering underneath her eyelids.

"She...she's had a fever for a few hours now, but the seizure just happened." Abby huffed some air out of her nose but kept her eyes down on Clarke's neck.

Once she got the last of the clots out of her neck she looked over at me carefully. "John, I need you to let go so I can see if her blood flows." I carefully unwrapped my fingers from her heart, my fingers twitching as I held them up in front of my face. My glove was covered in black blood. Her heart began to pump again, the blood pushing through her body. We let out a sigh of relief. Abby quietly stitched her back up. Jackson and Raven ducked their heads as they moved to the corner disposing of their gloves and washing their hands.

I was frozen, I couldn't stop staring at the line of stitches along Clarke's chest. The feeling of Clarke's heart in my hands was burned into my brain. I'd indirectly done this before, but now this was different. This wasn't Ontari's heart, this was Clarke's. If she would have died, it would be on me. It'll be because of me.

Once Abby ripped off her gloves she pressed a kiss to Clarke's head. Turning towards me she placed a hand on my shoulder. "Thank you for saving her. Again." She pulled me into an embrace, but I couldn't seem to move. It was like my entire body was frozen in time. I kept staring at my hand, too scared to move it. Abby pulled the glove off my hand, carefully pushing my fingers into the palm of my hand to close it into a fist.

Patting my shoulder, she moved past my, making her way to Madi and Emori in the corner of the room. I picked up a rag, cleaning the blood around her neck. I carefully bandaged her back up, covering her once again with the thick layers of blankets.

The room was still silent, a thick tension amongst all of us. I felt a hand on my shoulder, Emori. I lowered my head, looking down to my feet as I pressed my hands into the edge of Clarke's bed. She placed her head on my shoulder, the warmth from her face releasing the tension in my body. "She'll be okay. And it'll be because of you," she whispered in my ear. She wrapped her arms around my chest from behind, her head leaning into mine.

I pressed the weight of my head into hers, placing one arm on top of hers. My hands clasped desperately around the top of hers. We stood quietly watching Clarke's chest rise and fall. Emori knows how to keep me from losing myself. She's kept me out of the darkness. After a few minutes, I turned around wrapping my arms around Emori's waist. I leaned down pressing a kiss to her temple. "Thank you," I whispered into her ear. She wrapped her arms around my back giving me a nice squeeze in response.

I laid my chin on her shoulder, closing my eyes as if to escape reality. When I opened my eyes, Bellamy was staring over at me. He nodded slightly a thankful look on his face. Abby sat in the corner running her fingers through Madi's hair as she laid her head on her chest. Kane sitting beside her with his hand tightly gripped around her thigh. Azuma sat beside Octavia, his hand running up and down her arm. Octavia stared up at the ceiling, a cold blank look on her face. Miller sat with Jackson, rubbing his knee as Jackson leaned his head into the crook of his neck. Harper and Monty sat quietly with their elbows pressed into their knees. Raven was pacing back and forth her eyes darting across the floor.

I slipped out of Emori's grip, making my way towards Raven. I stopped her in her path. A flash of anger across her face as she stared at me. I grabbed her by her shoulders holding her an arms-length away from me. She began to tear up as I stared down at her, her body shaking underneath my hands.

I pulled her into a tight hug, the tears now slipped down her cheeks and onto my shoulder. I rubbed the back of her head. "I should've checked for clots," she mumbled against my shoulder. Abby sat up taking in Raven's words. I put my hand up letting her sit back. "I should've done a better job."

I silently rubbed circles into her back, waiting until her breathing became normal. Once she calmed down I held her away from me, looking down at her. "You can't be perfect at everything you do. It just wouldn't be fair." She let out a sad laugh. A soft smile on her face, her bright white teeth flashing beneath her luscious plump lips. "It's okay. She'll be okay."

Raven looked up at me. Her beautiful chocolate eyes looking up at me through her long black eyelashes. I felt a chill go down my spine pulling my attention back to everyone else in the room. I gave her shoulders a soft squeeze before stepping away.

I took a seat on a cot beside Monty, leaning my elbows on my knees and burying my face in my hands. Emori took a seat beside me, the tips of her fingers running up and down my spine. All we could do now is wait, wait for Clarke to show signs of getting better. All anyone really wanted to do was rip Bishop's head off, but that's a conversation we'd have when we knew everything was in the clear.

 **Madi:**

I woke up with Abby's arms tightly wrapped around me, her light snores against the back of my head. I stirred slightly to see everyone else asleep around the room. Kane sat on the floor, fast asleep leaning against the wall. Everyone else was curled up around the room on cots.

I slipped out from under Abby's arm stretching my arms above my head. Bellamy let out a loud groan as he tried to shift in his bed. I quickly ran to his side, helping him get comfortable, cradling his head in my hands. He made some room for me, gently patting the side beside him. I carefully crawled into bed beside him, lying on my side. I propped my head up on my hand.

I began pushing some hair out of his face, earning a painful smile. "Do you want some food?" Bellamy tilted his head to the side, almost surprised. "You were kidnapped, tortured, had surgery, and slept for who knows how long. If I were you, I'd be hungry."

He let out a laugh, instantly regretting it when he began to cough holding his sides tightly to stop the pain. "Yes. Food, please." I pressed a kiss to his forehead jumping out of bed. I tucked the blankets back underneath him.

I quietly made my way through the room, carefully stepping around everyone's cots. Before leaving I walked up beside Clarke's bed to check her pulse. Her pulse was strong. I pressed a kiss to her forehead turning back towards the door.

Medical was filled with people. People having indistinct conversations, people pacing, people crying. I hadn't been out of their room since Clarke was in the operating room. There were people giving me sad looks. I weaved through the room and into the hallway, the hallways filled with more people.

I ducked my head down making my way down to the kitchen. Once I made it to the kitchen I grabbed a hand weaved basket filling it with bread and meat. I packed a bag with bottles of water. If I was going to get food I might as well take some for everyone. Starving ourselves wouldn't help anyone. At least that's what Clarke told me, even though she never really practiced what she preached.

"What are you doing? You can't take that many rations." I turned around to see Glass standing with her arms folded in front of her, her foot tapping against the steel floor. She threw her hands up in the air taking a few steps towards me reaching out to grab the basket out of my hand. "I told you. You can't just take that many rations. Just because you're Clarke's daughter doesn't mean you can just do whatever you want." She swung her arms towards me again, but I stepped back.

Once she took a few more steps towards me, but this time I didn't step back. "This isn't just for me." She rolled her eyes placing her hands on her hips. But she just watched me as I continued to fill my basket.

She grabbed my arm tightly wrapping her fingers around me, her nails digging into my skin. Her other arm swung around to try to grab my basket. "I don't care. You can't just..." She was kicked off me by Indra who silently took a few steps standing behind me quietly.

Once Glass stood up, the confidence in her slowly disappeared. She tried to charge at me, but Indra quickly stepped in front of me. "I'd walk away if I were you." Glass's eyes widened as she stared at Indra. Her hands were balled up into fists, shaking from the anger raging through her body. But she turned around storming off. Indra turned towards me, her eyebrows knit closely together. "How's everyone? I wanted to come up, but I had to keep the guard up and running so that we don't have any more situations."

"Octavia and Bellamy are awake, but Clarke isn't looking so good. I'm taking this food up for them. If you want to come check things out I think it's best if you help me take some more food. Everyone's up there." Indra nodded, picking up another basket and filling it with more food.

We quietly began walking back up to medical. Once we made it into the hallway Indra stopped in the doorway. Her eyes looking around the halls at all the people waiting around. She cleared her throat, pulling everyone's attention towards herself. "I know you are all concerned about everything that has happened, but sitting around here will do nothing. When there is news to be discussed I will deliver it personally. Until then we will be working according to the schedule you have been provided."

Everyone silently filed out of the hallways and out of medical. Indra pushed past the crowd making her way inside, I slowly followed behind her ducking my head when people stared at me. Once we made it inside Indra carefully set the food on the counter in the corner of the room, making her way to the side of Octavia's bed.

I took a few pieces of meat, bread, and some water taking them towards Bellamy's bed. Crawling in beside him he opened his eyes, a smile on his face. I held the food up for him to see, his smile growing wider. "Here, let me help you sit up." I placed one hand behind his head and another behind his back. He moved up, leaning his back into the wall.

I sat up beside him, folding my legs underneath me. Picking up some bread I broke off a piece holding it out to feed it to Bellamy. He opened his mouth gladly taking in some bread. He hummed with pleasure. We ate in silence. Bellamy was too weak to eat his food himself. A part of me enjoyed being able to take care of him, but another part of felt bad that he was in so much pain.

"Thank you, Madi." Bellamy squeezed my hand, a large smile on his face. I helped him lie back down. He groaned loudly as I laid his head back down carefully, wrapping him up in the blankets. "Come on, Madi. Let's get some sleep." I crawled in at Bellamy's side. He placed his arm underneath my head pulling me closer to his chest. "I'm glad you're okay," he mumbled beside me.

I wrapped my arms around him squeezing him softly. With all the chaos it's good to know that Bellamy was here and nothing was going to change. If he was sad or in pain he didn't show it. Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia are all so strong, so unfazed by all the chaos. If they could, they would be up and keep everyone in line. Maybe that's what I should do. Do their job until they come back. Doing my part to help our people. As soon as I know that Clarke is going to be okay, that's what I'll do. I just can't leave without knowing. I don't know what I'll do if she doesn't wake up.


	35. Chapter 35

**A/N: Well the original Madi was played by Imogen Tear and when starting this fic no one knew Lola Flanery was going to play her, but I'm going to keep Imogen Tear as my Madi because she's 14 and I think that's a good age for Madi to be. Just saying. You'll understand why later. Hope you enjoy this chapter. xx**

 **This is Wrong**

 **Madi:**

I woke up when I heard a light grunt slipping through Bellamy's lips, his chest vibrating beneath my face. I slowly opened my eyes, it was still dark everyone was still asleep. Everyone except for Bellamy. I tilted my head to look up at him, but he pressed my face back down against his chest. He ran his finger through my hair, letting out a heavy sigh. "Get back to sleep. I'm sorry for waking you up."

I slipped out from under his arm, folding my legs beneath me as I sat up beside him. He was surprised, but he tried to move over to give me some more room. I pressed my hand into his shoulder, holding him in place. A soft gleam in his eyes as he looked up at me. "I can't sleep anymore. It feels…it feels wrong."

He narrowed his eyes up at me. His eyebrows closely knit together, there was a sad look in his eyes. "Madi, I know how you feel but until Clarke wakes up there's nothing any of us can do." He stretched out his arm beside him, a slight nod in direction of the spot beside him.

"No. Clarke wouldn't want this." He tilted his head to this side, complete confusion taking over his face. "There's nothing we can do for Clarke, but there's still a lot we can do for our people." His eyes widen, a tight smile tugging at the corners of his lips forming hollow dimples at each end. "Octavia can't do anything either, but I can. If we want to be ready for the winter we need to keep working. I can go out there with Indra and Azuma and Kane. Maybe Miller and Harper too. Even if medical and engineering are down we shouldn't stop construction." Bellamy placed his hand on my knee, his thumb running along my kneecap. "She wouldn't want this and you know it. So, let me do what you can't."

Bellamy opened his mouth to protest but was immediately cut off. "Don't worry. I'll take care of her." A voice came from over my shoulder. I quickly turned around to see Murphy standing behind me, his arms carefully folded in front of him. "She knows how to fight, she knows how to hunt, she knows how to trim trees. If anything, she'll make my job easier."

Bellamy stirred beside me, sliding his body up his arms struggled to hold up his weight. "In case you forgot you're injured too. Raven will have your head if you do anything to mess up those newly refurbished lungs." He huffed some air out of his nose, mocking the idea of Murphy going out to work.

"I had it better than any of you." He waved his hand from Clarke to Octavia. "She's right. Sitting around here and doing nothing is good for no one. We need to make sure we're all ready for winter." He stepped forward leaning down on the edge of the bed beside me, his weight being held up on two fists placed on the edge of the bed. "Madi may just be what we need to get everyone off their asses and back to work. Since she fought Costa no one's dared to question her. She's definitely proved herself."

"Well, she's already got you off your ass and ready to work. Something none of us could do while up in space for all those years." Bellamy looked back and forth from me to Murphy, a skeptical look on his face. Murphy and I exchanged a smile, but a part of me knew Bellamy wouldn't just let me out there so easily. "You can go, but you need to have a radio on you at all times. I want updates every hour."

I moved closer, wrapping my arms tightly around Bellamy's neck. He let out a surprised laugh before wrapping his arms around my back. "Thank you."

He pressed a kiss against my temple, giving me a final squeeze before pulling back. "If anyone can keep all these people in line, it's you." Murphy let out a heavy laugh behind me, matching Bellamy's laughter.

"I think you scare them more than Octavia does." Murphy placed a hand on my shoulder, gesturing towards the door. He turned around waking up Azuma, Kane, Miller, and Harper.

I quickly turned back to Bellamy pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "Radio me if she wakes up." He nodded, slowly moving back to the center of the bed. I wrapped his blanket around him again, tucking in the sides underneath him. Once I turned around Murphy, Kane, Miller, Azuma, and Harper were all crowded around the door quietly whispering being careful not to wake anyone up.

Once we slipped out of the medical bay and into the hallway everyone stopped and turned towards me. Indra quietly making her way down the hallway to join us. Everyone's eyes were focused on me. I felt my body slowly heating up, the pressure building up within me. A part of me wondered if this was how Octavia felt, but she probably didn't she was always so confident when dealing with "Indra, Kane you two will continue with training the guard, we'll get Echo to join you. Azuma, you need to get started with the hunting parties, we've already lost too much time we need as much food for the winter as we can get. Murphy, Miller, Harper you three will help me lead construction. We need to get things back in order. Kane, have the guards alert everyone that things will continue as scheduled."

There was a silence among everyone, each of them carefully exchanging looks. But soon there was satisfaction among everyone. I felt a large weight lift off my shoulders. I can do this, but another part of me feels like this is too big of a responsibility. Everyone looks up to Octavia, they admire her, they respect her. I'm no Octavia. I never will be. I don't have the confidence or the experience.

Everyone began to make their way down the hallway leaving me behind with Murphy. A proud look on his face. He clasped his arm around my shoulders tightly pulling me closer. Without a word, we followed behind everyone else. At least I wasn't completely alone. I'd have Murphy with me. He's rude sometimes, doesn't really filter through his feelings when talking to people but Clarke always told me it was just his way of dealing with his feelings. How he treats his family is different, it's clear he cares much more than Clarke ever really gave him credit for.

Once we made it towards the ship door there was a large crowd gathered in front of it. Tired faces around the hallway, some faces were tear stained. As soon as they caught a glimpse of us all walking down the hall they cleared the way allowing everyone to make their way to the front.

Some of the people were happy, excited even. Some people looked angry to be dragged back to work. I ignored the looks and made my way to the front where everyone else stood. I turned back towards the crowd of people, now gathered back together in one large crowd. All eyes were on me. I was nervous, but I couldn't let anyone see that. I cleared my throat to demand everyone's attention, something I learned from Octavia. She called it her first warning, her way of shutting everyone up before she stooped to some more physical measures.

As soon as the crowd fell silent I held my head up, being careful to keep my face hard. "I understand it may seem hard to continue working without the commander, but winter is almost here, and we can't afford to be unprepared. Until she gets back we will be here to keep things going." I gestured my hand towards everyone standing behind me. It's not like I was doing this alone, I had plenty of support. I'm surprised Kane wasn't taking the lead, Clarke always told me he was a great leader to their people. He always put himself out there to try to understand their people, to do what they wanted.

I turned towards the panel on the door quickly opening the ship door. There was a loud creak followed by a thump of the steal hitting the rocky floor. The darkness was almost overpowering outside, but the sweet smell of the fresh, cold air was calming. I missed being on the ground, the sensation you feel when the sun hits you or when cold rain runs down your body. Bellamy promised me that once the cabins were built we'd be sure to get one. Kane stepped beside me pressing a neighboring button instantly turning on some lights that had been set outside.

Everyone slowly filed out, indistinct conversations filling the air. Kane placed a hand on my shoulder giving me a proud smile. Before he could turn to follow everyone else out I grabbed his wrist, his head shooting back towards me. "Why are you letting me lead Wonkru? I'm far too young and Clarke told me that you were the leader of Skaikru."

He weakly smiled, his eyes scanned my face as he let out a deep sigh. "Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia taught me that age doesn't define your strength as a leader. From everything I've seen you do I know you're completely capable." I released his wrist, his arm falling back down by his side. He quickly turned on his heels making his way towards a crowd of people ready to start training.

I quickly made my way towards the group of people gathered around Murphy, Miller, and Harper all standing in front of them having a hushed conversation. Once I got there they quickly silenced bringing their attention to me. "The floor is all yours, commander badass." Miller gestured towards the crowd that had now fallen silent, nervous looks being exchanged all around.

"If you have not worked in construction you will have to learn from one of us. We don't have the time or the resources to waste so pay attention when you're being taught." There was frantic nodding among the new workers. "Those of you assigned to cutting down the trees will be working with Miller. Anyone trimming the trees will work with me. If you're shaping trees you will work with Murphy. And everyone else will be working with Harper to move the trees around wherever they need to be."

"Okay, now everyone get to work. You heard her, we don't have time to waste," Murphy yelled. He flashed me a smile before turning back towards the trees that needed to be shaped. Miller began to lead his group towards the tree line. I made my way towards the rows of trees that needed to be trimmed.

There was an eager group of kids no older than 18 all surrounding one untrimmed tree. Their fresh new faces all eager to get to work. "I want five people per tree. The sooner you get the tree properly trimmed the sooner they'll be able to shape it and use it to start building." People began to spread out instantly following my orders. It was a relief to see that they were actually listening, they almost looked scared though. "We will be trimming off excess branches and leaves, but be sure not to cut off too much."

I took Murphy's knife out of my back pocket and began trimming off branches. I felt everyone's eyes carefully watching my every move as I began working on the tree. Once I looked up everyone had a knife in their hand and were cutting away at the edges of the tree. As I began to make my way around the tree I felt a hand wrap around my wrist, tugging me back.

I turned around to notice Glass standing in front of me, her hand tightening around my wrist. Behind her stood a few kids. I pulled my wrist from Glass's hand folding my arms in front of me as I stared up at them all. They're all older than I am, about Clarke's age some were younger though. Glass has icy blue eyes and long blonde hair that falls down to her waist. Her skin is fair, a peachy tone with a soft pink tone in her cheeks. She works with Emori in inventory. Emori says she's rude, aggressive, unnecessarily disrespectful, and very arrogant. I've heard her complain a few times about this group of people.

Glass stepped forward, her small group moving closer up behind her. "What makes you think you're the new commander?" She huffed at me, an eyebrow raised to challenge me. I rolled my eyes but remained quiet. "You come out of nowhere after 6 years and expect to be able to lead our people? You don't even know who we are or what we're capable of." She stepped forward again her stature was threatening.

I stepped forward tilting my chin up, I wasn't going to let her get to me. "I'm not the commander, but I do care about our people. If we work as Octavia planned, we'll be ready for winter. That's all I want."

Glass let out a mocking laugh, her eyes rolling as she stared down at me. "Our people? You're not one of us." I ignored her, that's not true. Wonkru is about everyone being one, they are my people. "Clarke, Bellamy, Raven, Monty, Harper hell even Echo and Emori are part of Wonkru. But you…you came out of nowhere. If it wasn't for Clarke no one would even know who you are." The few kids standing behind her began to laugh hysterically, but Glass kept her eyes narrowed down at me. "You're not Octavia's second in command. I am. So, I think that makes me the true leader while she's in medical, right?" Everyone in the group began nodding their heads in agreement. Stepping closer up behind her.

I took a step closer to Glass, her eyes widened at the close proximity. "If you were Octavia's second, then why would she train me, spar with me, put me in charge while she's down." Sure, that was a lie, but she doesn't know that. She wanted to make me feel bad, but I knew I could make her feel worse. Glass's eyes weakened as she considered everything. "If you were her second why would she put you upstairs to run inventory on food and supplies?" Now everyone's eyes were wide as they stared at me, a shocked look on all their faces. "Yeah, I am Clarke's daughter. Maybe she is the only reason anyone cares about me, but at least someone cares about me. Seems to me like you're jealous." I winked up at her, a slight smirk on my face as I watched the confidence leave her face. "Oh, and if I were you I'd be careful before I go and tell Clarke about your little conversation with Bellamy a few days ago." A pink tone rose up into her cheeks, her eyes darting around to see if anyone was listening.

"What…what do you mean?" Her voice was shaken up like she'd seen a wild boar ready to attack her. She stepped back into her friend, everyone was shaken up now. I took advantage of their vulnerability stepping forward to make them feel even more threatened.

I let out a heavy laugh. "Oh, you know the conversation about not being able to stay away from him because it's been too long." I mimicked the facial expressions she had made when she talked to him, even mimicked the way she touched Bellamy's arm. I continued to laugh at the pain in her face. "I could rip your head off myself, but I think it'd be much more entertaining to see my mom do it for me, hell the commander would do it herself if she found out. So, if I were you I would back off before I make you." Once she heard that she wrapped her hand around her neck defensively backing up, her friends placed their hands on her shoulder.

I shook my head as I turned back around towards the group of people working on trimming the trees. Each of their heads shot back down once they saw me turn around, but I couldn't be mad. I was just too amused by the shift in Glass's confidence once her reality hit her. It was one thing to hate me for taking her position as Octavia's second, but it was another to bring my family into it.

I walked around everyone working looking over their shoulders to check to see if they were working efficiently. I hovered behind Luke, one of the few friends I had made since we'd all gotten together. He was a few years older than me, turning 18 soon. Luke was fun to be around, he always made me feel like I wasn't an outcast. He always included me in everything they did.

He looked up at me from the corner of his eye, a flash of his emerald eyes peeking up through his lashes. A tint of pink rushed to his cheeks as he acknowledged my presence. He ran his hand through his dirty blonde hair, the ends of his hair flicking back into place once he finished combing through it. I placed my hand on his shoulder, his tense shoulders relaxing beneath me. "Do you need any help here?" I pulled up a stool beside him, but he still didn't look up from the tree.

After a few minutes he tilted his head to the side, his eyes running along the side of my face as I began trimming off some branches. "Glass is just jealous of you, you know?" I peeked over at him, a soft smile on his face as he watched me. "But the rest of us, we think you're badass." I felt the blood rush to my face, but I couldn't find the strength to look up at him. "I think you're badass."

I found the courage to look over at him as he smiled at me, small dimples forming on both sides of his cheeks. "I'm just doing what Clarke taught me to do." I dropped my eyes back to the tree in front of me, my blood still rushing to my face. "But I saw you sparring with Indra. I think you're pretty badass too."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Well, I need the practice if I ever want a chance to spar with you." Luke's eyes were focused on me, the smile was now gone. He pressed his lips together as he stared. It almost seemed like he regretted ever letting the words slip from his mouth.

Just as I was going to say something I heard someone call my name from behind me. I quickly stood up, knocking over the stool, more blood rushed to my face. I could feel my cheeks grow pink. "Sorry. Sorry." I leaned down to pick up the stool, but Luke grabbed it before I could. "Tell me if you need any more help." I quickly turned towards around to see Emori sitting on the other side of a tree behind me. A large smile on her face.

I rolled my eyes as I made my way pulling up a seat beside her. "I hope you know that Bellamy will kill any boy who tries to talk to you," she laughed. She pulled out a large knife to start working on the tree.

"He's just a friend." My voice was so low I wasn't sure she heard me until she looked at me through her long, dark eyelashes.

"If he's a friend why are you blushing so much?" She grabbed my wrist, fanning out my hand in front of her. "Your palms are sweaty too." She continued to laugh, winking in my direction. "I mean Luke is a good kid, but you do realize that almost everyone in your life is overprotective, right?"

"We're just friends Emori. It doesn't matter." I nudged her side as I helped her cut off branches.

"Who's just your friend?" Murphy stepped forward leaning down beside Emori pressing a kiss to her temple. He looked up at me, his eyebrow raised. I shook my head, trying to avoid his glare.

Emori elbowed Murphy's stomach, earning a grunt from him as he rubbed his stomach. "Oh, stop it, John. Let her live."

I let out an anxious laugh, keeping my head down while I worked. "Any boy or girl that even looks at you the wrong way will be sorry." I tilted my head to the side peeking over at Murphy who was standing beside me with his arms crossed in front of him.

I stood up pushing my knife into my back pocket tilting my head up to meet Murphy's gaze. Swallowing the lump in my throat I narrowed my eyes up at him. "Shouldn't you be helping people shape trees?" He lifted his hands up in defeat turning to walk back towards his group.

Even if I do like Luke it wouldn't go anywhere. There's no time. Clarke isn't awake yet, Bellamy is still in bed, Octavia can't be up and walking for at least a month. There's too much that needs to be done. I don't want to ruin the good friendship I have with Luke anyways, there was too much to lose.

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up to an empty room. Everyone had gone back to work. Octavia was still asleep. There was a loud ringing in my ears, my blood pounding against my head. My stomach was aggressively throbbing. For the past few hours, I've slipped in and out of sleep for the past few hours. I can't even tell how long it's been or what's been going on outside of these doors. All I know now is that I won't be able to help anyone right now.

As I laid my head back hopelessly staring up at the ceiling I heard the door swing open. In walked Jackson with a tablet in hand, his eyes focused on the tablet. His eyes flickered up, scanning the room. Once his eyes fell on me he smiled widely. "Bellamy, how are you feeling?"

I weakly laughed as he helped me sit up against the wall. "I've been better." He began taking my vitals, checking all my wounds. Once he snapped off his gloves he looked up at me, a sad look in his eyes. I turned to look towards Clarke's pale body lying in a bed beside me. "Do you think she'll ever wake up?"

He winced as if the words had hurt him deeply. His head hung low, letting out a deep sigh. He made his way over to Clarke's side, a tear slipping down his cheek as he grabbed her hand. "I hope so."

"It's not your fault that she's like this. You couldn't have known she had a clot." Jackson was exhausted, he had been in surgery for way too many hours. He was under way too much pressure. Being one of the few doctors that could actually perform surgery was hard.

"I should've checked though. As one of the only licensed doctors of Wonkru I should have been thorough. I could have saved her." Another tear slipped down his cheek, but I couldn't do anything to relieve his pain. This was something he'd need to forgive himself for, but being one of Abby's closest friends that may come hard to him.

He wiped away his tears slipping his hands into a new set of gloves. He quietly checked Clarke's vitals. "How long have we been here? How long has she been out of it?"

"You two were missing for almost a day and you've been in here for about three days." He tucked her back pushing her short curly blond hair out of her face. As his hand ran along her face, there was a slight twitch. His eyes lit up as he looked up at me, completely wide-eyed full of shock. "Did you see that?"

"Do it again." Now he ran his fingers along the side of her face gently, her face immediately reacting to his contact.

"Oh my god." He pulled her eyelids apart checking her pupils. Pulling a flashlight out of his pocket he flashed it into her eye. She let out a groan from the pain. "Clarke," Jackson sobbed. I felt my heart drop to the floor at the sound of her in pain. Clarke squinted, her eyes squeezing shut.

Her eyes shoot open and she frantically jolts her body up, pure panic in her eyes. "Finn. Where's Finn?" Her breathing became heavy and she groaned from the pain of her wounds as she sat up. Jackson pushed her back up against the bed. "The grounders took Finn. You can't let them kill him. He killed those people for me." She was yelling and squirming underneath Jackson's grasp.

I quickly got up trying to get out of bed. I need to see Clarke. "Bellamy. Don't. Stay in bed." There was pure panic in his voice as he held Clarke down. "Relax. Let me examine you and I'll tell you everything, Clarke."

She lied back, her breathing still heavy, her head flew back and forth as she examined the room. "Bellamy." I sat up to get a better look at her, my pain was overpowered by the desperation in her voice. "Where's Finn? Did she kill him? What happened with the alliance?"

"Clarke. What are you talking about?" This can't be happening. Was she delusional? Did she think we were still fighting against Mount Weather?

"Finn gave himself up," she sobbed hysterically. There was so much desperation in her voice.

"Clarke. That happened over 6 years ago." Her face tensed and her eyes grew wide. I could feel the pain in her eyes hit me like acid fog from Mount Weather. "He's been dead for 6 years Clarke."

Tears streamed down her face as she contemplated everything. "No." Her voice was broken as she yelled at me. "You're wrong."

"Memory loss. She doesn't remember anything after the point where Finn was taken. The lack of oxygen to her brain has deficits. This is one of them." Jackson picked up a radio and rushed out the door, surely to radio everyone that she's awake.

As soon as he left the room I pushed myself to the edge of my bed, throwing my legs over the bed. The pain sending a shock through my head. I could feel my head throbbing and my vision getting blurry but that wasn't going to stop me. I edged off the bed slowly putting my weight onto my feet, but my legs quickly began to give out from under me as my body flew to one side. I used the wall to push myself towards the edge of Clarke's bed. My body felt like it was giving out from under me, but it didn't matter. I needed her. I needed to see her. I needed to hold her.

Once I got to the side of her bed I dropped to my knees. Tears welling up in my eyes as I stared at Clarke. I grabbed her hand pressing my forehead against it. I have never been so grateful to see her beautiful sky-blue eyes, even if they were filled with tears. I rubbed her hair out of her face cupping her cheek in the palm of my hand.

"Where's everyone else? Everyone from Mount Weather?" Her voice was shaken up, the fear seeping through. But that's because she knew she could only be like this with me, it's one of the reasons I loved her. She may be the heartless commander of death to everyone else, but to me, she was much more.

I wrapped her hands with both of mine squeezing a little tighter. "Clarke. You've been through a lot. A lot has happened since then." I pulled the blanket off of her lifting her shirt up to reveal the various cauterized wounds across her stomach. "You were tortured by the people of this prisoner ship. We made it out of Mount Weather. We saved almost everyone. Finn died. We survived Praimfaya. We're all together now." I pressed a kiss to the knuckles of her hand.

Her face froze, and she slowly pulled her hand from mine. A surprised look on her face, her eyes were wide, and her mouth was cracked open. "Finn what? What?" She began to sob hysterically, she threw her head back and forth. I pushed myself onto the side of the bed. Once I could settle in on the edge of her bed I pulled her into a tight embrace. She buried her face into my shoulder, setting her arm on me to hold herself up.

I rubbed the back of her head with one hand and her waist with the other. "It's okay, Clarke. You're okay." After a few minutes of Clarke crying, she leaned back wiping the tears off her face. I pinned her shoulders back against the bed, her body immediately relaxed as she laid back. "Get some rest, maybe your memory will come back."

The door slammed open and Madi came running in. Her eyes wide, her face stained with tears, but a large smile on her face. She ran by Clarke's side hugging her, Clarke was taken back complete confusion on her face as she stared down at her. Clarke wrapped her arms around Madi, reciprocating her hug but still completely lost to who she was. "I thought I lost you," Madi sobbed. I rubbed her back lightly as she buried her face deeper into Clarke's shoulder.

"I'm sorry, I don't know who you are." Madi lifted her head out of her shoulder, tears running down her face. Her brows were closely knit together as she looked over from Clarke's face to mine. I rubbed her arm trying to comfort her, but it clearly wasn't working. "Bellamy." Clarke looked over to me, her eyes questioning who this girl was.

"She's your daughter Clarke." I turned to see Abby standing at the foot of Clarke's bed, a sad smile on her face. Clarke's face was completely shocked her entire body tense. I placed my hand on her thigh giving her a reassuring nod. "After Praimfaya you were stranded on the ground alone while the rest of us were in a bunker or in space. She kept you sane." Madi continued to cry as she sat the edge of the bed slowly edging closer to Clarke. "You didn't have her, but you found her and she's no different than being your own. You and Bellamy are the closest thing she has to parents now."

Clarke looked over at me, a scared look in her eyes. She grabbed Madi's wrist pulling her back into her chest and hugging her tightly. Her eyes shot up to look at me, but she didn't say anything. She looked back towards Abby, tears welling up in her eyes. "Mom." Her lips quivered tears building up in her eyes again.

Abby stepped forward sitting at the foot of her bed, rubbing Clarke's leg. "It's okay. Jackson tells me you have some amnesia. I'm going to need to run a few tests to see how much of your brain has been damaged and if we have any hope of your memory coming back." She slowly stands up tucking the blanket back underneath her leg. Abby steps to Clarke's side pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I'll get all the tests together and review things with Jackson. Until then you two should get some rest." She made her way around to my bed pushing it closer to Clarke's bed. She patted the sheets down smoothening out the sides. "In bed Bellamy. You can talk to Clarke from here."

I slowly pushed myself onto the bed beside her lying back, neglecting all the pain I was feeling. Madi stood up tucking the blanket back under Clarke. "I know you don't remember me right now, but I'm glad you're okay." She pressed a kiss to her temple, giving her a tight hug. "I love you." Clarke squeezed Madi with all the energy she had left, pressing a kiss to Madi's cheek.

Madi pulled away making her way to the side of my bed crawling in at my side and wrapping her arms around my waist. "Everything will be okay." Madi looked up at me, a relieved look on her face. The door flew open again everyone filed inside. Raven, Murphy, Emori, Miller, Monty, and Harper.

Everyone surrounded our beds, large smiles on their faces, a wave of joy entered the room with them. "I knew you'd wake up. You're too stubborn to die," Murphy laughed. Everyone joined in with laughter. "How are you feeling?" Murphy sat at the foot of Clarke's bed anxiously watching her as she looked around the room.

"I feel like I just got hit by a flare and my insides exploded." Clarke weakly laughed, grabbing her sides from the pain of laughing. "I just wish I remembered anything from the past 6 years."

"You remember me, right? That's all that matters." Murphy rubbed her leg laughing louder than before. Emori lightly smacked his shoulder.

Madi slipped off the edge of my bed quickly standing at the side of my bed. "I know we all want to stay here and try to help Clarke gain her memory back, but we've got a lot of work to do. Let's go." She shooed everyone away pushing them towards the door.

"Wow, she really is my daughter," Clarke laughed. Tears built up in Madi's eyes as she pushed everyone out of the door, flashing a soft smile before slipping out the door. She was right, now that everyone knows Clarke is okay it'll give everyone more motivation to work. Even if she doesn't remember anything we'd be okay.


	36. Chapter 36

**Revelations**

 **Clarke:**

I woke up pressed against Bellamy's side, my face buried in the crook of his neck his soft stubble itching against my face. Bellamy had his arm carefully placed underneath my head, his breathing was heavy. I remained in place making sure I don't wake him up, it's clear he was still in pain some of his wounds looked inflamed. If we were living in peace with the grounders how could this happen?

It was odd to think that I had a daughter now, that it had been 6 years since Mount Weather. I had forgotten such a large portion of my life. No one's told me much yet, but that's because everyone's working to get things ready for winter. Where was Finn? Where were Lincoln and Jasper? Where are we? This place doesn't look like anything we had on the Ark. There's actually fully functional machines, medicine, beds. It was nice, but where did this all come from? How did we get all of this? There's a lot of missing dots that needed to be drawn back together.

Bellamy began to stir beneath me, his breathing slowly becoming normal. I shifted my weight away from him, but his arm tightened around me. He began to roll out his neck, pressing his nose into my hair. Once he was completely awake he backed away, pulling his arms out from underneath me. "I'm sorry. I just..."

I awkwardly shifted my body over, the pain shooting throughout my body. "It's okay. I was the one on your side." Bellamy's eyes run along the curves of my face, his eyes narrowed down at me, a dimple forming at the corner of his mouth when he smiled. He felt safe. A part of me didn't want to pull away, but like before this isn't the time. Knowing Bellamy, he's probably got a line of girls waiting for him to recover, just like before.

There was an awkwardness between us, something we'd never had before. But it was quickly broken when the door to our room opened and Madi came in holding a basket of food. Bellamy and I shifted apart. I could feel my cheeks growing red from the embarrassment, but what was I embarrassed about? I mean Bellamy is my fiancé. Is it so wrong to feel something for him? Madi set the basket down between us, kicking her boots off before she climbed in between us crossing her legs beneath her.

"We wanted to have lunch with you guys. It's not the same being down there without you." Bellamy shifted up leaning his back against the wall, I quickly followed suit sitting up beside him. It was hard to focus on the physical pain when there was so much going on that I was completely unaware about.

Immediately the door opened again. Now Murphy, Raven, Monty, Harper, and Miller walked in followed by a woman about our age. She had a square jaw with high cheekbones, a large tattoo running from the left side of her face and cutting through the middle of her nose. She was clearly a grounder. She had honey brown eyes, emphasizing her caramel skin tone. Beside her stood another woman who appeared to be a grounder. She had pale skin and long brown hair. Her face was round with prominent cheekbones and full lips.

The woman with the tattoo on her face stood beside Murphy her arm carefully laced around his. The tall woman stood beside Bellamy, her hand placed carefully at the edge of the bed. Her eyes ran up and down Bellamy's body every few seconds. Occasionally her eyes would meet mine, but they immediately dropped down to the floor. Maybe she was Bellamy's new conquest. Maybe that was what Bellamy was into now. But that's none of my business, he was just my co-leader and now that Octavia is in charge I guess we're just friends.

Madi shifted closer handing me some well-cooked meat. Everyone else sat on the edges of some cots. Raven sat in the corner of the room, her hand mindlessly massaging her leg. "How's the work going out there?" I broke the silence that was consuming the room. Everyone's eyes shifting up to look at me as they ate in silence.

Madi smiled widely as she took a bite of some meat. "We've almost got enough trees ready to start putting together our first cabin." She placed her hand on Bellamy's leg giving it a soft squeeze. "Maybe you can come out and tell us what to do?"

"Maybe." Bellamy looked over to me, a hopeful look in his eyes. He nudged Madi's side with his foot softly smiling down at her. "You've taken over for me for one day and you've already got these kids whipped into shape better than me?"

Murphy scoffed from the foot of our bed, he stood up pulling a stool at Bellamy's side. "You have no idea." He patted Madi's shoulder, earning a light laugh from Madi. I was taken back by the depth of Madi and Murphy's relationship. It seemed genuine like Murphy actually cared for someone other than himself.

"If she's going to be the commander one day it's good to start practicing now," Octavia mumbled as she pushed herself up. Raven quickly stood up, grabbing her arms and helping her lean up against the wall. "Has anyone given you any trouble?" Raven grabbed some meat and bread for Octavia setting it in a basket and handing it to her before sitting back down at the edge of a cot. Her elbows leaned forward onto her knees.

Madi looked over to Murphy, a tight smirk on her face. The famous Blake smirk, she was a spitting image of Bellamy. Long dark hair, fairly light freckles across her nose, dirt all over her face, and some bruised knuckles. But she had the most beautiful green eyes and a round face almost like mine. "You really need to have a conversation with Glass," Murphy mumbled lowly. Low enough so you could barely put together the words coming out of his mouth.

Glass was one of the girls from the Ark. She came down with the rest of our people. She's what Bellamy would call one of the privileged. Her mom and dad were both engineers working alongside my dad. But unlike her parents, Glass was superficial, rude. Bellamy may have called me a princess, but I think he just had me confused with Glass.

Bellamy's body tensed as he stared down at Madi, an infuriated look on his face. "What did she do now?" Miller belted out a laugh, nearly choking on the bread in his mouth. Harper threw a bottle of water at him, but Miller couldn't stop laughing. Bellamy rolled his eyes, unfazed by anything. I felt like an outsider not knowing anything that had been going on or had gone on. It was weird to feel like the outcast when I had been so involved in everything else, but I guess that's just my life now.

"Nothing," Madi mumbled under her breath. Bellamy's eyes narrowed down at her, he folded his arms in front of his chest. She huffed out some air before looking back up at Bellamy. "She said that she was Octavia's second and that she should be leading instead of me." Murphy nudged her side, urging her to continue but her face fell back down to the food in her lap. "And she said the only reason I'm in charge is because I'm Clarke's daughter." She angrily bit off a piece of her bread staring down. Me? Why would her being my daughter mean anything? I'd only been the leader of the hundred, but once my mom came down I was nothing. If anything, I had to have been a doctor, but that's it.

Bellamy leaned forward tilting her chin up so her eyes met his. "You know that's not true." She looked back down at her food her eyebrows tightly crinkling together. A warm feeling tingled in my heart as I watched Bellamy. Obviously, he was good with kids, he practically raised Octavia and he had been good with Charlotte too before she died. But to see him actively interacting with Madi was nice. Madi had to be at least 13 or 14. I mean being that young and being a leader, she had to be amazing.

I shifted closer to her placing my hand on hers. She immediately looked up at me, a disappointed look in her eyes. "Yes, you are my daughter, but I can see you're so much more than that. When we came to the ground I'd be a terrible leader without Bellamy. The fact that everyone trusts you to do this on your own already proves you're better than I ever was." The gleam returned in her eyes as she stared at me, a tight smile on her face. She squeezed my hand. It's true. The way everyone looked at her was clear that she played a large part in everyone's lives.

"She's right. Clarke thinks with her head, but not with her heart. Bellamy thinks with his heart, but not with his head. I use my aggression. You do all three." Octavia tilted her head towards us, a soft smile on her face. "You've learned from our mistakes and that makes you better than any of us."

I never thought about it like that. I guess I am one to think things through from my head and Bellamy has always been the one to think things through with his heart, but that's why we kept each other centered.

"She's right. You have earned everyone's respect. Clarke has nothing to do with it." Madi smiled handing Bellamy some more bread and meat. I would give anything to just remember everything, remember Madi, remember all the good and bad things that had happened in the past few years.

Raven sat back down in the corner of the room, a blank expression on her face as she was deep in thought. "Raven." Her eyes shot up to look up at me, a sad look in her eyes. I held up some meat and bread in my hands nodding my head in the direction of the stool at the edge of my bed. "You haven't eaten anything. If you're going to be working I think it's important to build your strength."

Everyone else quietly continued their conversations. Raven took a seat beside me, taking the bread from my hands. Bellamy and Madi were deep into a conversation with Octavia. "Are you okay?"

She looked up from her bread, a light gleam in her eyes. She shook her head. "This is my fault. You can't remember anything because of me. I'm sorry." Raven's head hung low as she stared back down at the bread in her hands. How was this her fault? "I was the one who did your surgery, I didn't see the clots."

"You? Why would you do my surgery?" She didn't look up. The room fell silent, everyone carefully watching me. I placed my hand on her wrist pulling her attention back up to me. "Raven. Tell me."

"Jackson was doing surgery on Bellamy. You were in terrible shape and Abby was still doing surgery on Octavia." Her voice was breaking, but her face was tense. "Bishop tortured you and nearly killed you. I was all we had left to help you. I'm sorry I let you down." Who was Bishop? Why was he torturing me if Octavia was in charge? I'm not even the best doctor, what significance would I have? But all of that was beside the point Raven shouldn't feel guilty for saving my life.

Shifting my hand from her wrist to her hand I gave her a soft squeeze. "I lost my memory, but at least I'm alive." A tear slipped down her cheek as she shook her head. "Thank you for saving my life, again." She wiped the stray tear, sniffling softly. There was a relieved look on her face followed by a weak smile. Before I knew it, I was wrapped up in a hug. Raven's hair tickled my nose as she tightened her arms around my neck. Once she pulled away I handed her the rest of the basket of food. "Now eat." She laughed taking the basket and placing it in her lap. Bellamy placed his hand on mine gently squeezing. I turned to see him softly smiling at me. He handed me some more bread.

Raven didn't deserve to feel guilty for this, she's not a doctor. She could be, but that doesn't matter. Some things can't be controlled. It's the hardest part about the job, it's unpredictable. We don't have the resources to foresee such issues. At least not any that I know of yet.

Jackson burst through the door scanning the room that had now fallen back into place with indistinct conversations and laughter, a soothing feeling amongst everyone. "Everyone's gotten back to work, so should all of you." He nodded towards the door, his arms crossed. "Emori I need your help with managing the medical inventory." He was facing the petite grounder woman with a large tattoo across her face. Emori. She pressed a kiss to Murphy's cheek before standing up and making her way towards Jackson. "Echo, Kane and Indra need your help with training." The other grounder woman nodded quickly standing up and making her way out the door. "Raven, they need you upstairs to check the systems. Security is down in the prison cells." Raven immediately jumped up, her eyes wide as she made her way past Jackson.

Soon everyone made their way out of the room and it felt empty again. Octavia had fallen back asleep. Everyone had changed so much, they looked happier. But how could anyone be happy if we had lost so much? We lost so many people. We lost our home. It makes me wonder what I've missed in the past few years. How did we come to join in with the grounders?

Bellamy slowly pulled his body back down lying on his side. "How are you feeling?" He shifted his weight onto his side, holding his head up with the palm of his hand.

"I feel like there's a lot that I don't know." His nostrils flared as he shifted a little more, settling into his side to get comfortable. I lifted my hand up to brush my hair out of my face when I caught a glimpse of something shining on my finger. I stopped examining my hand carefully, I felt the blood rush to my face. This is my mom's ring.

I looked back up at Bellamy. He tilted his head to the side, a soft look in his eyes. He opened his mouth slightly, almost ready to say something but he couldn't. I continue to stare down at the ring on my finger. Bellamy grabbed my hand, running his thumb along the knuckles of my hand. His eyes focused on my hand. "I wouldn't even know where to start."

I squeezed his hand, placing my free hand on top of his. "Start by telling me how everyone is." His eyes shifted up towards me. I felt my heart clench as he stared at me. His chocolate brown eyes made me feel transparent, something I'd never understand why. His eyebrows knit closer together forming a soft wrinkle above his nose.

He shook his head, his dark curls dancing across his forehead. "Your mom, Kane, Octavia, Raven, Monty, Murphy, Miller, Harper, Jackson, and about 100 of our people survived." There was a sad look on his face, his lips curling into a frown. "After we freed everyone from Mount Weather there were a lot of issues with the grounders. Jaha brought back a psychotic computer chip that controlled everyone's minds created by the program to cause the nuclear war. The only good thing to come from that was her telling us that there was another radiation wave that was going to kill us all off, making Earth uninhabitable for five years." He stopped taking in my expression, an almost frantic look on his face. "We found a bunker to hold one hundred people from each clan. Most of us stayed there, but some of us had to go back to the Ark ring."

I couldn't even process all of this. Only 100 of our people were left. How did we free everyone from Mount Weather? What was this computer program? A part of me felt like my whole world was being turned around. Bellamy began to rub circles into the back of my hand with his thumb still carefully watching me. And that's all it took to snap me back into reality. "What happened to everyone else? Finn, Jasper, Lincoln?"

His eyes dropped down again, his breathing a little heavier than before. He let out a deep breath before shifting his attention back to me. "Finn was killed." He shook his head, dropping my hand as he leaned back onto his back. I felt my head start spinning and my blurry grow blurry, but I focused my attention back on Bellamy. "Jasper was killed by the radiation wave, Praimfaya. Lincoln was executed by Chancellor Pike. Every clan was allowed 100 of their people, so whoever didn't make it on that list was left out in the radiation."

A tear ran down my cheek, I felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest. "How? How did Finn die? Why wasn't Jasper in the bunker? Why was Lincoln executed? Why was Pike, our old Earth skills teacher, the chancellor? Who let this happen? Where was I?" I felt my body heat up. I felt more angry than sad. This wasn't fair, how could I have let this happen? How could anyone let this happen?

Bellamy turned his head towards me a hard look on his face as he watched me. "Finn was killed when he turned himself in." He looked over his shoulder towards Octavia, but she was still sleeping. "Lincoln. He was executed...he was executed because of me." A few tears built up in his eyes, but he looked up at the ceiling blinking them away.

I grabbed his hand tightly, now it was my turn to comfort him. "I'm sure that's not true." He looked up at me through his lashes. The Bellamy I know may do a lot of questionable things, but he was no killer. He would never do that to Octavia. I rubbed some hair out of his eyes, my fingers lingering along his forehead. This was clearly a conversation we'd need to have when we were actually alone, just the two of us. I held my hand out, wiggling my ring finger in front of his face. "So, are you going to tell me why I'm wearing this?"

He weakly smiled at me, his mood a little lighter but I could still see the pain in his eyes. A subject change was just what he needs right now. Clearly, the past few years were, emotional to say the least. Something that may be hard to think about. He grabbed my hand holding it out in front of him. "Well, most people wear it when they're engaged or married." His mouth tugged into a tight smirk. Goosebumps grew across my body, a wave of happiness hitting me. It's a relief to see the smile on his face.

I rolled my eyes, giving him a half-smile for his half-joke. "Which am I?" Bellamy shifted a little closer, the heat from his body beaming off of him. I could feel my cheeks grow pink. Was it wrong that a part of me hoped that this ring was his? He's my friend. My co-leader. My partner. That's all we've ever been. That's all we'll ever be. But with Finn dead, I don't know who else it could belong to. Had I fallen in love with a grounder?

Bellamy cupped my cheek in the palm of his hand. My face felt tiny alongside his hand. Another waved of joy jolted through my body. It was almost embarrassing at the way I reacted to him touching me. I quickly shook off the feeling focusing my attention back on him. "You're engaged." He looked down, cracking a soft smile. His eyes slowly shifted up to meet mine. "You're engaged to me." He pressed his lips together, two dimples forming at the corners of both sides of his mouth. A sad look touched his eyes as he stared at me. "But you don't have to be. I know this all might be a lot for you and you don't remember any of this, but..."

I quickly wrapped my arms around him, burying my head into the crook of his neck. It took him a few seconds to realize what I had done before he wrapped his arms around me too. A sigh of relief slipping from his lips. It was nice, it was safe, it was home. Something I had always felt with him but was always too scared to ever admit to myself let alone anyone else. "I trust you." He tightened his grip around my waist. It's true, he may be an asshole most of the time, but I trust him. He's been one of the few people I've come to care for, he'd always been there for me. "Maybe I'll remember everything or maybe I won't, but I know whatever has happened or will happen you'll always be by my side."

"How can you be so sure? I'm not the person I was when we first landed on the ground." There was a sad look on his face as he pulled away, but I kept my hands above his keeping him in place.

"I hope not," I laughed, earning a laugh out of him too. "You may have been reckless, completely insane, and big headed but every stupid thing you did was to protect your sister and to protect everyone else." The smile on his face grew, he tilted his head to the side almost embarrassed by it all. "But if it's any consolation I've loved that side of you even then."

Without any hesitation Bellamy pressed his lips against mine, sending a wave through my body. But this feeling was different, it felt like everything was falling back into place. A revelation, no an epiphany. Everything hit me almost instantly. Everything I had been missing was back. I quickly pulled away holding Bellamy's face in my hands. His face dropped, but once he caught a glimpse of the smile on my face he looked at me completely confused. It was all back. All the memories of Mount Weather, Allie, and Praimfaya. Finn, Lexa, Roan, Luna, Jasper. I couldn't contain my feelings any longer. Warm tears poured down my cheeks, uncontrollable sobs slipping from my mouth.

Bellamy pulled me into her arms, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist, his chin carefully placed on my shoulder. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I just...I don't know. I'm sorry," he mumbled into my ear. His tears ran down my shoulder.

I quickly pulled away holding his face in my hands again, the tears still uncontrollably falling down my face. I pressed another kiss to his lips, this one was deeper full of desperation. The relief of knowing he was alive and well, that everyone was. I couldn't stop crying as I kissed Bellamy. Savoring every second of our kiss, my hands slipping into his hair and his hands tightening around my waist pulling me closer to him. The feeling of having his lips on mine was heavenly like there was nothing that could ever break us apart.

Once I found the courage to break away I stared at him, the tears had now stopped. His lips were swollen, hair completely disheveled from the way my fingers twisted through it. We were both panting, trying to regain our strength before making any further movements. "I didn't think you would make it." That's when it hit him, the realization of knowing it was all back. That I remembered. A single tear slipped down his cheek as a large smile grew on his face. He couldn't contain his happiness, once again pulling me into a tight embrace this time he buried his face into the base of my neck. He placed gentle kisses up my neck right to the back of my ear.

He pulled away once he reached the soft spot behind my ear. "I should have kissed you earlier," he laughed. A stray tear running down his face. I wiped it off his cheek. He pressed his forehead into mine, letting out a deep sigh. He leaned forward fixing the pillows elevating my leg before lying back, pulling my head against his chest.

This was what home felt like. We'd been through hell together, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Maybe at one point, I'd wanted to start all over, just forget everything and reset but now I know that's not true. I'd give anything to have all of this. Everything we'd been through only made us who we were.

Bellamy pressed a kiss to my temple before falling back asleep. I stayed awake watching his chest rise and fall, the image of Bishop cutting a knife through his side engraved into my brain. The tears were endless once I took a look at the stitches across his stomach, his bruised face, and the inflammation around all his wounds. My heart hurt for all the pain he had to have gone through. But it doesn't matter now. Now we will get better, grow stronger, and we'll make sure that Bishop gets what he deserves.

 **Yikes I don't know how I feel about this chapter if I'm being completely honest, but hopefully you guys like it. I'm a little skeptical, but it was breaking my heart to have Clarke lose her memory. Some of the best Bellarke moments happened after Finn died, so you know I couldn't do that to them. Sorry if this feels rushed. Still hope you all enjoy it. xx**


	37. Chapter 37

**Trojan Horse**

 **Raven:**

I took a bite out of the bread. My mouth watered from the burst of flavor sending a wave down my jaw. I had been so stressed these past few days because of Clarke that I hadn't noticed I hadn't eaten much. It was a relief to know she was okay, that she could get better.

The door slammed open, Jackson rushed through scanning the room quickly. There was a worried look on his face, he almost looked scared. He shook the look away, standing tall in front of the doorway. He folded his arms in front of him staring at around the room. "Everyone's gotten back to work, so should all of you." He nodded towards the door, his arms crossed. "Emori I need your help with managing the medical inventory." Emori pressed a kiss to Murphy's cheek before standing up and making her way towards the door. "Echo, Kane and Indra need your help with training." Echo stood up making her way towards the door, but turning once to look back at Bellamy as she left. It's been hard for her since she came down. Especially with everything between Bellamy and Clarke, she's been distant from everyone. I don't blame her though. Jackson turned towards me, the fear back in his eyes. "Raven, they need you upstairs to check the systems. Security is down in the prison cells."

I felt all the blood leave my body as I jumped up pushing past him and out of the door. As I began running up the stairs towards the control room I could hear Monty close behind me. "I'll reboot the system, you check the prison block cameras." Monty placed a hand in the small of my back pushing me through the door of the control room in silence.

I nearly fell into the stool beside the control panel instantly punching in the system codes. Once I was into the system I saw a glitch. It looked like someone had accessed the database from an outside source. I tried to fight against the firewall, but it was strong. The systems were remotely accessed from somewhere within the ship.

A gasp slipped from Monty's lips, his eyes widened, and his jaw dropped. "They're loose in the prison block." A wrinkle formed between his eyebrows, his jaw clenched tightly. "The cell gates all are open, but the doors are sealed."

I scanned the chaos unfolding on the screens displayed in front of Monty. Some prisoners were breaking down the cells and making weapons of the pieces, some were yelling and screaming, and some were crying in the corners of the prison block. Right outside both doors stood a large group of armed guards.

"Someone remotely accessed the control system. They added firewalls, it'll take some time to get through to break down this glitch." Monty leaned down against the panel trying to break through the system. When he realized he couldn't get through he slammed his fist into the table. "Radio everyone, we need to get this under control before it's too late." He nodded, picking up the radio and turning towards the door but before he was out of reach I grabbed his wrist pulling him back. "And don't let Bellamy, Clarke, or Octavia find out." He looked at me a questionable look on his face. "They need the rest and we don't need them getting hurt anymore. Send guards up to guard them. I want people inside and outside at all times."

Monty nodded making his way out in silence. As he left I felt the weight of the world fall back onto my shoulders. Pressing the palms of my hands against the cold metal of the control panel I hung my head low, trying to get a grip of reality. What would Clarke do? What would Bellamy do? Hell, what would Octavia do? Octavia would prepare the guard to sweep the prison deck, but that could be dangerous. The prisoners are now armed, and I don't want to put our people through any more than they'd already been through. Bellamy would guard all possible exits and prepare for an escape, with a full surveillance of the prison deck. Clarke. I don't know what Clarke would do.

This isn't on me. I'm not in charge, but I can help. I sat back down and started logging the keystrokes that had been used remotely. I'm not going to let these people get away with this. If there was anyone who could out-hack a hacker, it's me. This firewall has to have some source of vulnerability. The door burst open, Madi came running in. Kane walked in close behind her.

"What do we have?" Kane stood behind me, his eyes running along all the computer screens in front of me. Madi took a seat beside me, staring up at the security cameras. She carefully watching as the chaos in the prison deck slowly escalated. People were beginning to hit the doors, trying to break them down. Some people had even stooped low enough to fight each other.

"Someone hacked the system remotely and opened all the cell doors, but they couldn't break through the block doors." Kane stood beside Madi, his hand running along the screens counting each person. "We can't just rush in there and put them back in cells. They've got the advantage and from what I've seen a lot of them are armed with weapons now."

"Weapons? Where'd they get weapons?" Kane's voice was caustic. There was a distinct anger in his tone. He shut his eyes temporarily regaining himself. Once he opened his eyes they were still burning but were much calmer. "What are we going to do?"

"Do we still have knock out gas?" Madi's eyes were focused on the screen, as she mumbled. She pointed at the top of the screen at some vents up at the high ceilings. "If we have knock out gas we can drop it from the vents and then attack."

"We only have a few cans, not nearly enough to knock out all of them," Kane responded. His eyes carefully watching Madi. She was right, if we had knock out gas it would be an easy fix as long as I broke through the systems.

"But lucky for you, we have a great chemist who could replicate the gas." Monty walked into the room, setting the radio down beside me. He wrapped his arm around Madi, rubbing her shoulder with the palm of his hand. "Our commander here knows what she's talking about."

"It just feels like something Clarke would come up with." She tilted her head to the side leaning her head against Monty's shoulder. Clarke really did good things for this girl. She's made her an amazing person and an even better leader. But I guess I wouldn't expect anything less from her.

"That's because it's something I would come up with." Clarke was being rolled in by Abby, followed by Bellamy being brought in by Jackson. Abby pushed her up towards us. I glared at Monty who responded with a simple shrug. "Come here my little natblida." Abby and Jackson quickly slipped back out the door. They probably had a lot of work to do up in medical since the hunting parties were rushed back from their trip.

Madi rushed over wrapping her arms around Clarke's neck. She squeezed her eyes shut, a large smile on her face as she rested her chin on Clarke's shoulder. "You remember," she sobbed into her shoulder. Clarke rested her hand on the back of her head, a tear slipping down her cheek.

Bellamy sat beside them a proud smile on his face. "How could I forget you?" She pressed a kiss to Madi's temple before pulling away. Clarke quickly scanned the room looking around at the security screens. "Monty, we need you to make some more knock out gas. Raven get to cracking the code on this firewall." Monty quickly slipped out of the door immediately. I sat down trying various techniques to break through the firewall. Clarke turned towards Kane, her eyes carefully knit together, a hard look on her face. "Octavia wants to be here, but since she can't sit properly she has to stay in medical."

"What do we do until Monty makes the gas?" Kane stood in front of Clarke a puzzled look in his eyes. "What if they break out? They have weapons and I don't want any more causalities."

Bellamy cleared his throat. "We will create a blockade around all possible exits. Guards will set up posts outside of the blockades. I want all weapons hot down there. Do a full sweep of the ship. We can't have them slipping through any more hidden tunnels."

This was all getting to be so much. Who would have known that these prisoners would be so resourceful? I continued to code in silence. I just can't do this. I'm a mechanic. I can't code anymore. Ever since I lost Allie I feel useless. I need her. I need Sinclair. I let out a deep breath, ignoring everything else around me as I sat there staring at the screens in front of me.

A trojan horse. I need to send a trojan horse to infect the system. If this works I can get in through the back door. I quickly set up the malware, ready to send it in as soon as possible. The chaos only further motivating me to work faster. I looked up towards Clarke, she immediately stopped talking mid-sentence turning her attention towards me. "I think I've got it." She reassured me with a nod. Sending in the malware a series of data began transmitting, codes filling the screens. Immediately began looking for the backdoor. My codes countered this hacker, the glitch had now disappeared and the only thing I had to do with shut down the firewall. After a few minutes I found the switch to shut everything down and reboot.

The system began to reboot, and I felt the weight lift off my shoulders. A sigh of relief slipped from my lips as I rested my face in my hands, running my hands over my head. The system would be okay, our people would be okay, Clarke was okay. I did this. I squeezed my eyes shut, the image of Sinclair standing in Allie's lab flickering through my head. His words echoing in my head, "You did this, Reyes, not me, not her." My entire body relaxed as I let the tension leave my body.

I turned towards Clarke, a relieved look in her eyes as she watched me stand up. "It's done. We just need that gas and we can get everything back under control. The control system was accessed by someone in the prisoner deck. Either Bishop has someone in our guard or they got access to the system."

Clarke, Bellamy, Madi, and Kane all went off on a tangent about what needed to be done and how we would approach such a situation, but I couldn't hear anything over the ringing in my ears. A pressure built up within me. I felt a darkness taking over my body, all my limbs falling very weak as I stood up against the control panel for support. But soon the darkness overpowered me and the last thing I remembered was my body giving out from beneath me.

 **Clarke:**

I turned back towards Kane, Bellamy, and Madi each of their faces filled with relief. "Since Raven took down their systems Kane you should start the sweep. Make sure our people are safe." How could they have been so careless? After everything that has happened you would think they'd want to keep tighter security, but this was no time to argue about that. That is a conversation we'd need to save for later when we're in the clear.

"Azuma, Echo, and Indra are all running their units throughout the ship. Our people will be safe. But we can't push back these executions anymore. These prisoners are just wasting our time. We should be preparing for the winter." Kane's tone was authoritative. He's right. The further we let this go the more time we'll waste. We can't let lose any more people. If we don't get things ready for winter, we won't survive. At least not all of us.

"You're right. Once this is all under control we'll have a meeting in medical. We'll decide how to start these executions." Everyone nodded in agreement. Just as I turned my head towards Raven to see what she was doing I saw her body collapse, immediately hitting the floor. "Raven," I yelled. Kane and Madi both rushed to her side, exchanging concerned looks. "Check her pulse."

Before Kane could Madi pressed her fingers to Raven's carotid carefully watching her chest rise and fall. "Her pulse is a little weak, but she seems fine." She pressed the back of her hand to her forehead. "She's a little feverish." Madi remained calm, but the concern was clear in Kane's eyes as he stared back and forth from Raven to me.

"Are her muscles tense? Is her skin dry?" Raven had barely taken a bite out of bread after I told her to, she looked weak. She could be sleep deprived and dehydrate on top of not having eaten much. I hope that's all this is. She's really tortured herself over all of this.

Madi began to press her hands into Raven's arms and legs tightly wrapping her arms around her. "Her muscles are tense. What does that mean?" Madi rubbed her hand along her skin. She opened held open Raven's eye. "Her skin is dry, and her pupils are dilated." She slowly looked back and forth from Raven to me. "She hasn't been eating or drinking and she's barely slept. Is that why she fainted?"

"Radio my mom. She's going to need intravenous fluids to rehydrate her body and at least a few hours of sleep." Kane immediately stood up making his way out of the door to radio someone from medical to get her. "Madi hold her head in your lap."

She lifted Raven's head carefully placing her legs beneath her head for support. She began running her hands along her forehead, gently caressing her face and pushing the hair out of her face. Just then Murphy burst through the door dropping to his knees beside Raven, a tear slipping down his cheek as he stared down at her. "What happened?"

Madi placed her hand on his knee, softly rubbing circles into it with the pad of her thumb. "She'll be okay. Just some dehydration and sleep deprivation," she whispered. Her tone was so gentle it was like she thought he was going to break at the sound of her voice. But she understood Murphy in a way that only Emori had ever known. Murphy's eyes met Madi's and the grief shifted to relief.

Bellamy placed his hand at the base of the back of my neck, softly massaging it with the tips of his fingers. His jaw was clenched tightly, a concerned look in his eyes. 'It'll be okay,' he blinked. He fingers rubbed circles into the back of my neck, it had become his way of comforting me. I leaned my head back into his hand taking in the situation at hand. I tilted my head towards him. 'I know,' I blinked back.

Soon some guard trainees walked in. Luke and Jones. Jones was tall and slim. He had sharp topaz eyes that stood out among his smooth, amber skin and his scruffy, dark brown hair. I think Jones would make a better member of farm station like the rest of his family, but he wanted to be different and we respected that. Luke, on the other hand, had tan, opal skin. He was tall and lean. He had short, dirty blonde hair and deep green eyes. He looked nervous, looking around the room at everything but Bellamy and me.

He and Jones both stood in the doorway, their hands placed on a gurney held in front of them. "We're uh…we're here to take Raven up to medical." Luke looked down at from Raven to Madi, but once Madi caught his eyes he looked away. Sweat beaded up across his forehead.

I looked back and forth from Madi to Luke, there was an awkwardness between them. But I simply nodded allowing them to take Raven from Madi's lap.

They set the gurney on the floor beside her limp body. Luke carefully placed his hands beneath Raven supporting her head against his chest. Jones got down on one knee ready to pick up Raven by her ankles when Murphy leaned forward smacking him out of the way. "You can't just pick her up like that. She's got a bad leg." He leaned beside her cradling both her legs in his arms helping Luke pick her up and place her on the gurney. Once she was on the gurney he moved out of the way.

Jones stood up brushing off Murphy. Murphy stood in the corner carefully watching them pick up the gurney. There was an anger in his face, burning in his eyes. His nostrils flared as he watched them carry her out.

As soon as the door closed the cackle of the radio stole everyone's attention. The sound of Monty's voice echoing throughout the room. "Raven. Raven, are you there?" His voice was shaken up.

Madi quickly stood up snatching the radio from the control panel. "It's me. What's wrong?" Her face hardened as she stared at the radio.

"We can't make the knock out gas. We don't have enough methyl propyl ether to put it together. We've only got one can and that's not enough to take all of them out," his voice was lower, sadder.

Without the knock out gas, we'd be hopeless. The room is small enough and it's possible that if we use all the gas we can take out at least half of their people, but it's still a risk. Bellamy quietly sat there, his hand running along the stubble on his chin.

"Tell him to bring the gas." Madi did as she was told, but Bellamy remained focused on the floor in front of him. He turned his head towards me, his eyebrows knit closely together. "The sleeping gas won't take out all of them, but it will take out most of them." That's true, if even half of their people are out we can easily take down the rest. "The gas will impair them long enough for us to lock them back up. For the people that aren't affected by the gas won't see us coming if we fill up the entire prison deck with gas."

I couldn't hold back the smile on my face. Bellamy had really developed as a leader. "You're right." He slightly smirked, proud of himself.

"That's something I thought I'd never hear," Murphy mumbled from the corner of the room, a sarcastic smirk on his face. I rolled my eyes ignoring his comment before leaning back into the other side of the wheelchair. My entire body began throbbing from the pain of sitting up for too long, but I just need to fight through it. There are more important things than me being in pain right now.

"Me too," Bellamy laughed. I proceeded to hit him in the chest, but he caught my hand pulling it up to his lips pressing gently kisses to the back of my hand. I tightened my grip around his hand giving him a soft squeeze. "Let's get you back up to medical, you need to get some rest, Princess."

"And before you say that you don't have time to rest right now, let me tell you Madi does the job better than both of you." Murphy flashed a quick smile to Madi who was quietly standing in front of the computer, her eyes focused on the prisoners. There was a comfort in knowing that everyone loved her and respected her. She didn't have to deal with people looking down on her because of her age. "I'll call Luke and Jones back down to get you."

"I guess you don't need me anymore." I held out my hand for Madi and she quickly stepped forward taking it. She kneeled in front of me, fixing her beanie with her free hand. I reached forward placing the hair in her face back behind her ear.

She placed another hand on mine. "I'll always need you." She stood up pressing a kiss to my head. She'd matured so much in such little time. But I guess that's what the ground does to you. When it was just us two we didn't have much to worry about, but now. Now it was different. Now we had so many other people to worry about. "But you can't help me when you're like this." She gestured to the wheelchair a sad look in her eyes. "You need to get some rest." She turned towards Bellamy placing a hand on his shoulder. "And you too."

Luke and Jones walked through the door. Immediately Madi moved out of the way, standing beside Murphy. What had gotten into this girl? Why was she so weird when these two were around? Did they do something to her? I felt my blood boil, but she won't tell me something like that right now. She's been walking on eggshells around me and it feels weird. She's always told me everything, now it just feels like I'm out of the loop.

Once Luke and Jones pushed Bellamy out of the hallway we were greeted by a hallway filled with members of the guard. We were lucky to have so many people amongst Wonkru willing to fight. Each guard stood on either side of a room their eyes focused ahead until they saw Bellamy and I make our way by. We were greeted by various nods and waves.

As soon as we made it back into our room Luke and Jones both helped get me back into bed, but Bellamy was too stubborn to let anyone help him. He stood up on his own and fell into bed beside me. A loud groan slipping through his lips as he lied his head back. The boys quickly left as soon as we were both lying down. Octavia was asleep in the corner of the room.

I shifted my body closer to Bellamy, he instantly placed his arm under my head wrapping me up in a tight embrace letting out a deep sigh. I tilted my head back to look at him. "Do you think Luke did anything to Madi?" His entire body tensed as he stared down at me. He was damn near ready to jump up and rip their throats out. Protective Bellamy mode was back. "I mean did you see the way Madi acted when they walked in the room? Luke couldn't look at her and she couldn't look at Luke. Do you think something happened between them? Do you think he did something to her? But she would tell me, right?"

Bellamy lied his head back staring up at the ceiling. "I think anyone and everyone in this camp knows not to mess with Madi. I'll personally gut anyone that tries to touch her." I let out a heavy laugh. Bellamy angrily stared down at me. "I'm serious. If anyone touches a single hair on her head, I'll have _their_ head."

"Bellamy, she's 14. Luke isn't that much older than her." He looked back at me, a dazed look on his face. "Think about it."

"Oh no. She's too young. He's like 18. No way." He shook his head aggressively, a strong tension in his body.

I rolled my eyes hitting him in the chest. "You are such a hypocrite. Madi is 14 and Luke is 18. You're 29 and I'm 24." I continued laughing at him. He pinched my side to stop me, but I couldn't stop. "In case you forgot how you were when you came down here, I don't think you have much room to talk."

"I am her dad. I have plenty of room to talk. I will gut that boy if he thinks he can like my daughter. I don't care." He took his arm out from underneath my head, folding it in front of his chest. I stared at him, my jaw hung low. But he just closed his eyes tightly. "I know you're staring at me, but no. I don't care."

"It's just a theory anyway. She'll tell me when she's ready. But I don't know why you think you'd get to hurt him if he did anything stupid with _our_ daughter." He tilted his head towards me, his eyes running along the curves on my face. "Sure, people fear you, but Luke couldn't even look me in the eyes. He stared right into yours."

He scoffed rolling his eyes as he leaned closer to me, his face inches away from mine. There was a slight tension between us, but it was hot. Overwhelmingly hot. He even closer, his lips brushing against the base of my ear. "They just don't know you like I do." I could feel his mouth inches away from my ear, his tongue running along his bottom lip. My body was on fire. His hand wrapped around my back beneath my shirt. His finger ran along my spine. "I know every strength. Every weakness," he whispered softly. The heat from his mouth sending goosebumps across my skin. Once he reached the small of my back he tightened his grip around my waist, his thumb carefully placed on the curve of my hip that instantly sent my stomach in knots.

I leaned closer, pressing kisses from the base of his neck up until his jawline. Once I reached his soft spot behind his ear, a light moan slipped from his lips. "Two can play at this game," I whispered before pressing a kiss behind his ear, earning me a groan. I cracked my mouth open sucking in his skin to leave my mark. He snaked his other hand around my waist pressing himself into me. I tilted my face closer, so my face was hovering right above his. A distance so close we could feel the electricity burning between us. Now it was just a matter of who would give in first.

He began to squeeze the curves in my waist, my stomach knotting even more than before. I ran my hands beneath his shirt, digging my nails into his shoulders just hard enough to leave a mark. I ran my nails down his back and to his waist. Our eyes were focused on one another, neither of us willing to lose. I licked my bottom lip, slowly bringing my teeth down to bite it. My hands slipped beneath the edges of his waistband around his hips, my fingers teasingly running along his sides. That's when he gave in, pressing his lips against mine. The passion and desire poured out of his mouth, every part of him pressed into me but that wasn't close enough.

He began to slip his hands underneath my waistband his hands reaching back beneath me, our lips magnetically held together as our hands moved around. We were so distracted we didn't notice my mom walking in, pushing Raven's bed beside Octavia until the door slammed behind her. We immediately pulled away, Bellamy protectively pulled the covers from my chest all the way up to my chin. A rosy tone rising in his cheeks.

"Glad to see you guys are doing better," she laughed. Her eyes were focused on the tablet in front of her. "Don't mind me, I was just leaving."

"How's Raven?" My mom turned back a disappointed look in her eyes. "Is it bad?"

"No. She'll be fine. She needs a few hours of sleep and lots of fluids. I just feel like this is my fault. Had I not been so hard on her about the clot she would have taken better care of herself." She ducked her head staring at Raven through her eyelashes.

I could feel Bellamy's body tense as he stared at her. "It's not your fault. All that matters now is that she'll be okay." My mom looked back at Bellamy, a weak smile on her face.

"You two get some rest." She raised her eyebrows and tilted her head to the side. Bellamy and I exchanged a look, bursting into laughter. She shook her head, disappointed. "I've got patients to see," she responded swiftly making her way out the door.

I lied my head back on Bellamy's arm, staring up at the ceiling. Bellamy leaned over pressing a kiss to my temple. He buried his head into the crook of my neck, placing a gentle kiss. "She's right. We need to get some rest." He placed another kiss to my collarbone. "We can continue this when we get a room of our own."

I leaned down pressing a kiss to Bellamy's lips before lying my head back. Bellamy laid his head on my chest, on arm draped over me and another placed underneath my head. I wrapped my arms around him, my fingers running through his hair. It was hard to believe that there was a crisis outside and all of us were lying in here completely uninvolved. Sure, I wanted a break but not like this. I stared down at Bellamy's sleeping face on my chest. Maybe right now this is all we can do for our people. I ran my finger along the stubble that had grown across Bellamy's chin, the ends tickling the tips of my fingers. Everything's become so chaotic. Octavia was hurt, Raven was unconscious, Bellamy and I are hurt. But at least we're okay. At least I didn't lose him again.


	38. Chapter 38

**Delinquents**

 **Madi:**

I sat in front of the control panel watching the chaos continue in the prison block. They were yelling, screaming, throwing things, trying to break down the doors. Everyone was all set and ready to go, we just needed Monty to come down with the knock out gas. I kept my eyes on Bishop standing in the middle of the chaos, his arms folded in front of his chest. His face was plastered with a sinister smile, his eyes focused on the camera. It was almost like he knew I was watching.

The door burst open, Monty rushing in with a few cans of the gas. "I've got everything ready, who's going to drop it from the ceiling vents?" He walked towards a closet, pulling out a backpack. He carefully began to place the cans into the backpack.

I cleared my throat making my way beside him. "I am." He instantly his eyes focused on me.

"You're not doing this alone. I won't let you." He continued packing the backpack and throwing it over his shoulder. He picked up a gun placing it into his other pocket. "I'm going with you."

"I can do this." I stretched my hand out, gesturing towards the backpack. Monty stared at me, wide-eyed. His jaw clenched as he ran his fingers through his hair.

Placing his hand in mine, he gave it a soft squeeze. "I know you can, but you shouldn't have to." He pulled me into his side, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. "We can do this together."

I leaned my head against his shoulder, returning his kind gesture. "Together." Monty was always quieter, usually kept to himself. He wasn't like everyone else, he was usually detached. But he just had a different way of showing he cared, he wasn't like everyone else and that's what made him special. His silence was always comforting. Clarke always told me he was naturally a comforting person, one to just make you feel better with his presence.

Monty released our embrace quickly picking up a map and a flashlight, heading towards the door. Outside Murphy and Emori stood on either side of the door, their heads quickly turning towards us. Emori was holding onto a long, sharpened sword. Murphy had a rifle wrapped around his chest and a pistol tucked into his side.

"Murphy found the entrance to the prison block vents. You and I will go through there while he gives us directions." Murphy nodded before heading down the hallway. Emori pulled some masks out handing one to Monty and one to me. "When we get there, we need to throw as many of those cans down in the prison block as we can. Make sure to spread them out in different directions, we need to affect as many people with each can as possible."

"There's a vent on either side of the prison block. What if you attack from one side and I attack from the other?" He looked over at me, contemplating the idea. "That way they won't know which side to attack first, assuming they do attack."

Murphy stopped in the middle of the hallway, turning towards me. His eyes filled with anger and frustration. "No. You can't go on separate sides. What if they do attack? We can't take that risk." He looked back and forth from Monty's face to mine. He ran his hand through his hair, balling his hands into fists. "We can't risk it for either of you."

Emori walked up behind him placing her hands around his waist, his muscles immediately relaxing but his eyes were still burning. "John, it's okay. I'll go with her." She flashed me a smile, her hand mindlessly massaging Murphy's shoulder. "I'll keep her safe."

"In case you forgot Madi is a badass, she can take care of herself." Miller walked towards us, a large smirk on his face as he looked around at everyone. "But we won't let you do this alone. I'm going in there too."

"Then who's going to stand out on guard?" Monty's eyebrows crinkled together as he took in Miller's appearance. He stood beside Murphy with an extra mask in his hand.

"I will." Harper's voice echoed from the other end of the hallway. "Miller and Emori can go in with you two. Murphy and I will stand out and make sure everything runs smoothly."

Clarke had always told me stories of the delinquents coming together in times of need and how they always fought for one another. Getting to know them all over the past few weeks showed that they all cared for each other in a way that no outsider could ever understand. They were our family and blood didn't need to define that. They love each other, they didn't need to say it because it was obvious in the way they cared for each other.

Emori intertwined her arm with Murphy's arm, her lips pressing against his ear as she whispered in his ear. Murphy leaned his head closer to her face, his lips curling into a soft smile. Monty and Miller exchanged a reassuring handshake while Harper pressed a kiss to Monty's cheek. There was laughter amongst all of them, a lighter mood. Even in the darkest moments, they gave each other light, and that was the best thing you could do for someone you loved.

Harper wrapped her arm around my shoulder, squeezing me tightly. "You ready to take down some prisoners, commander badass?" She dropped her arm back at her side, flashing me a smile.

I simply nodded as we continued to make our way back down the hallway. Monty and Miller walked in the front, deep in conversation. Harper and I walking closely behind them. Emori and Murphy walked in the back, hand in hand. They quietly whispered to one another, occasionally letting out a laugh.

The vent was a lot higher than I'd anticipated. Monty placed half the cans in another backpack handing it over to Miller, who quickly threw the backpack over his shoulder. "Miller is coming with me and Emori is going with you Monty. Once you're done throwing the cans in stay there. Be prepared to disable anyone who isn't affected by the gas." Monty and Emori exchanged a nod. Miller patted me on the shoulder. This is our only shot if we can't control them now things can only get worse.

Harper and Murphy helped everyone get into the vent. They started with Monty, pushing him up closer to the vent. He groaned as he began pulling himself into the vent. Once he got in he held his hand out for Emori. Emori placed a chaste kiss to Murphy's lips before using him as support to stretch out towards Monty. He quickly grabbed her hand pulling her in.

Immediately they turned making their way towards the other side of the prison block. Next, Harper and Murphy pushed Miller up. He gracefully pulled himself up into the vent. Miller was one of our stronger guards. Clarke always referred to him as Bellamy's second because Bellamy had trained him in combat himself.

Once Miller stretched out his arm for me Murphy and Harper turned towards me. My nerves kicked in and I could feel my stomach knot. This time it wasn't just me. I had to make sure I took care of my family too. There was much more on the line. Murphy turned towards me as if reading my mind, he pulled me into a tight hug. He let go leaning down in front of me, both of his hands on either shoulder. His face a close distance away from mine. He whispered, "You can do this. I know you can." I let out a deep breath before turning towards the wall.

Harper and Murphy wrapped their arms around my legs, pushing me towards Miller. I stretched out my arm, the tips of my fingers skimming Miller's. They pushed me up a little higher, Miller's hand tightly clasping around mine. I used my other hand to secure his hand before Murphy and Miller let go. He quickly began to pull me up when one of my hands slipped from his. My entire body being held up by Miller's grip on a few of my fingers.

I let out a scream before Murphy and Harper could support my weight beneath me. They pushed me back up this time Miller grabbed me with both his hands wrapped around my wrist. Once I got in he pulled me into a hug. "I'm so sorry, Madi. I should've been more careful."

I rubbed his back, his muscles releasing some tension beneath my touch. "It's okay. I'm okay." I pulled away quickly crawling towards the prison block. Miller followed closely behind me. "If this doesn't work, make sure you shoot Bishop in the leg first." His brows knit together as he stared at me, a confused look on his face. I ignored it turning back towards the path in front of me.

Bishop had tortured my family enough. It was time for him to get what's been long overdue. I've had enough of him. He's done nothing but hurt us and I've had enough. If no one else was going to do anything it was time to take matters into my own hands.

Once we made it in front of the vent I scanned the prison block for Bishop. There he was, standing aimlessly in the middle of the chaos. His eyes were still focused on the security camera, a large smile on his face. Miller took out two masks and carefully set up the cans in front of us. I placed my hand on his. "I've already talked to Azuma. Shoot Bishop in the leg. Azuma is going to take him to the interrogation room, so I can...talk to him."

"Madi, I don't think Octavia would want that." He stared at me, his eyes were bulging. There was a darkness in his chestnut eyes.

"I know, that's why Azuma and I didn't tell her." His jaw dropped as he stared at me, completely astonished. "But if we don't do this he's only going to make things worse. And I can't forgive him for what he did to them. They may deserve this kill, but I know they can't right now. I won't take the risk of having him around any longer." Miller stared at me, incapable of uttering a single word. Disobeying Octavia was something no one had ever dared to ever do. I placed my hand on his knee. "Just do it, okay?"

He nodded continuing to take out the cans from his backpack. Octavia can't even attempt to walk for at least another two weeks. Clarke won't be able to walk on her leg for at least four months. Bellamy won't recover for at least a week. The longer we take to do this, the more vulnerable we're leaving ourselves. Clearly, the guard was incapable of actually doing their jobs. But that's a conversation for another time.

I caught a glimpse of Monty sitting across the room behind the bars of the vent. He was quickly setting up his cans, Emori sat beside him a gun in hand. Emori always preferred working with swords and knives, but that would be useless right now. Even though she rarely used guns she was a good shot. Miller and I quickly put on our masks, he pulled out his guns placing them in front of himself. He held up his rifle and aimed it towards the prisoners beneath us. They were still running around completely oblivious to what was to come. Their screams were echoing throughout the vents.

As soon as Monty was done, he put his mask on giving me the go ahead. Instantly we kicked out the vent doors, the doors falling straight down knocking out some prisoners standing beneath the vents. The block fell silent and all eyes fell on us. I unlocked the cans throwing them in every direction, the gas filling the room. There was confusion amongst everyone as they took in what was happening, but as soon as they realized they were under attack their screams echoed throughout the room. Although some of the chaos faded as people fell unconscious, most of the people were still awake. Luckily the gas had blocked their vision and the guard has broken through the doors.

Once the guard rushed into the room Miller sat back waiting for the gas to clear. His eyes were focused on the ground. I have a sword tucked into a sheath, if I grab a gun I can take Bishop down myself. It may be a long jump, but with the number of prisoners down there, I'm sure they'd break my fall. Octavia, Bellamy, and Clarke would all be up front and center ready to take down the prisoners so why am I here hiding like a coward?

I quickly grabbed one of the guns lying in front of Miller and without any hesitation jumped out from the vent. I could hear Miller screaming above me, but it was too late. The cloud surrounded me completely blurring my vision. Once I landed on the ground my eyes adjusted to the blurry mess in front of me. The only thing keeping me from being blind was this suit. There were prisoners scattered across the floor, some were up and fighting against members of the guard.

I scanned the room looking for Bishop when I felt a metal rod hit my side, a sharp pain burning in my side. Anger built up within me, I quickly turned to see Bishop inches away from me. I could feel the anger spread throughout my body, completely inflamed. I whipped out my sword, the sound of the blade rubbing against the sheath echoing above the chaos. Bishop instantly took his metal rod ramming it into my stomach, twisting it before letting it go. I felt my breath hitch, but I quickly took a few deep breaths ripping it out and swinging it directly for his head.

He took a few steps back, his hand reaching up to cradle his head. There was a shocked look on his face as he stared at me. He stabbed me with a rod but was too stupid to realize I was wearing a protective suit and that he'd only superficially cut me. When his eyes met mine, I took the rod spearing it into his stomach, straight through him. His cold blue eyes widened, I could see the life leaving his body. I ripped the rod out of his stomach, his body immediately falling in front of me.

I felt two arms quickly grab me and throw me over their shoulder. It took me a few seconds to realize that it was Azuma carrying me out of the prison block. Guards were running around pushing prisoners back into their cells. Behind us, I saw Luke and Jones were dragging Bishop's lifeless body behind us. A large smile on Luke's face as his deep emerald eyes carefully watched me as I hung from Azuma's shoulder.

Once we got out of all havoc Azuma carefully set me back down. His eyes were dark, filled with anger. He grabbed me by both of my shoulders, leaning down towards me. Murphy, Miller, Monty, Emori, and Harper came running towards us, but immediately stopped once they saw me standing in front of Azuma. "You were supposed to stay with Miller," his tone was bitter. I dropped my eyes to the floor, avoiding his gaze. Luke and Jones moved past us making their way up to the interrogation room. "You could have been hurt." He pulled me into a tight hug, my face buried into his chest. His hand wrapped around the back of my neck, his thumb rubbing against the side softly.

He pulled away, holding me an arm's length away from himself. I tilted my head to the side, staring up at him. "I'm sorry." He squeezed my shoulders once more before releasing me from his grasp.

I turned to face Murphy staring at me, his arms tightly crossed in front of his chest. His eyebrows were raised and there was a harsh anger in his eyes as he stared down at me. His lips were pressed into a tight line, nostrils flaring. "You could have gotten yourself killed," he yelled. Before I could say anything, he stepped forward wrapping his arms tightly around me. He cradled the back of my head with the palm of his hand. I returned his hug, wrapping my arms tightly around his back. My hands fastened behind him. "I wouldn't be able to forgive you if you would have gotten hurt."

Murphy usually showed his emotions through sarcasm, but this was genuine. I could feel the pain in his voice, vibrating through his chest as he hugged me. I tightened my grip around him, squeezing even tighter. "I guess it's a good thing I didn't get hurt." He let out a laugh. Miller, Monty, Emori, and Harper all stood behind him hardened expression across their faces. Azuma stood a safe distance away from them, carefully watching us.

Once Murphy pulled away from me I held my arms out, a hopeful smile on my face. They all immediately made their way over entrapping me in a tight group hug. I felt someone press a kiss to the top of my head. "There'd be a long list of people to have our heads if anything were to happen to you," Miller laughed. The feeling of everyone's chests vibrating as they laughed relaxed. Everyone released me except for Miller who had tightened his grip on me. His head rested on my shoulder, as he squeezed his eyes shut. "Hold on, I need this because once Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia find out I let you jump out of the vents I just might die."

"I'm sorry." He finally released his grip on me, a sad look in his eyes. "I shouldn't have jumped. But when you go up to talk to them, let me know. I'll go with you." His face lightened, but even he knew he wouldn't get let off the hook so easily. It was selfish of me to jump down without tell him or even warning him.

"What are we doing now?" Harper looked over at Azuma who was patiently standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall. She stared back at me, narrowing her eyes down at me. "Come on Madi I know you've got a plan."

"Time to make Bishop pay." Everyone's eyes widened. I felt Murphy glare at me, but I quickly moved down the hallway grabbing Azuma by his forearm. Everyone quickly followed behind us. Azuma willingly stepped into a flow with me making his way down the hall with me.

As soon as we got to the interrogation room Azuma stood in front of the door. His arms folded in front of his chest. "What happens in this room will not leave this room until I say so." Everyone exchanged some looks before nodding in unison. "Octavia, Bellamy, and Clarke don't know about this and I intend to keep it that way until Madi says so."

I turned towards them, shocked looks on everyone's faces. "I'm going to weaken him. Make him suffer. Once he's on the brink of death you all will bring them down and they will get to finish him off." Maybe it isn't fair that I'm doing this for them, but it needs to be done. Bishop is an unnecessary burden.

I turned back towards Azuma who proceeded to open the door to the room. Luke and Jones silently stood on either side of Bishop. Bishop was handcuffed to the chair, his head hanging in front of him. Luke looked up at me, but his eyes instantly fell back to the floor as he saw Azuma standing close behind me. I know my family was intimidating, but Luke always looked scared of them. Jones was never afraid to stare them right in the eyes. Luke usually can, but for some reason when I'm around he just gets scared.

Everyone stood around the room, there was a table set up with weapons. There's no time to dwell on whatever Luke's problem is right now. Miller and Murphy stood behind Bishop, Harper and Emori stood beside the weapon trays on both sides of Bishop. Azuma stood in the corner with Monty. I made my way towards Bishop, checking his pulse. It was weak but steady. He wasn't severely injured, at least not yet.

"Get me a med kit. I need to patch him up, so we can continue." Harper started looking through the cabinets around the room. I squatted in front of Bishop slapping his face lightly to wake him up. He let out a soft groan, but his eyes remained shut. I took the back of my hand slapping his cheek as hard as possible. "Time for some vengeance." His eyes slowly flickered open, his cheek began to turn a bright shade of pink. "You didn't think you could hurt my family and get away with it, did you?" His eyes focused on me, a fearful look in his eyes. He tried to clear his throat, swallowing a large lump in his throat.

Harper approached me with the med kit opening it up and setting it aside. Luke kneeled beside me quickly picking up some gauze and a large knife. I grabbed his wrist to stop him. He placed his hand on mine. "It's okay. I'll take care of it." His eyes shifted up to meet mine, his hand still carefully wrapped around my hand. After a few seconds, I pulled my hand from him allowing him to continue.

Luke had been training with Abby in the bunker to be a doctor, but once they got out of the bunker he was needed as a member of the guard. Octavia said it was a better fit for him. I watched him as he filled Bishop's wound with gauze and disinfectant. "Heat this up." He handed the blade to Jones who quickly left the room to do as he was told.

I stood back up, placing both of my hands on either side of Bishop and leaning forward. He was growing pale his forehead was covered in sweat, his eyes looked feeble. I stepped away from him taking a knee beside Luke. He looked up at me through his lashes, a rose-tone rising in his cheeks. "Radio me when you're done with him." I turned towards Miller, his eyes narrowed down at me. "Time to have a conversation with Clarke, Bellamy, and Octavia."

I could see the tension enter his body as he stared at me. Ignoring it I made my way out of the room, Murphy, Miller, Monty, and Emori all followed close behind me. Harper and Azuma stayed in the room to make sure nothing happens while we're gone. The last thing I need right now is another Bishop issue.

To get the full satisfaction of torturing Bishop I'd need him alive and well enough to feel the pain. Until then I guess I need to go talk to Clarke and Bellamy about what happened. It's better that they find out from me than from anyone else.


	39. Chapter 39

**Together**

 **Bellamy:**

I woke up surrounded by a halo of golden hair and a warm body pressed against my chest. Clarke let out a slight groan, stretching herself out. She pressed her body into mine, tightening her grip around my waist. I tightened my grip around her waist pressing a kiss to the crown of her head.

Tilting her head up she pressed a kiss against my lips, her lips still squeezed shut. She rested her head back against my chest, her fingers softly running along the row of stitches on my stomach. She looked up at me, the sky beaming up at me through her soft blue eyes. "Feels like most of your inflammation is gone. You'll be fully healed in a few days."

She pushed out her bottom lip, pouting up at me. I ran my thumb along her bottom lip, softly pressing my lips to hers. "Good, then I'll be able to take care of you." Her lips curled into a tight smile, her chest filling with excitement. She squeezed me a little tighter burying her face back into my chest. I took a look over my shoulder to see Octavia and Raven still sleeping. "This is the first time any of us have slept through all the chaos."

She inhaled deeply, resting her chin against my chest. "I know it feels weird, but you have to admit it feels good. The first time in a long time that the weight of the world wasn't on our shoulders." She let out a light laugh, dimples forming in her cheeks and the corners of her eyes wrinkling together. "I'd say we've raised them well enough to let them handle this on their own."

I pushed some hair behind her ear, cupping her face. "You raised Madi. She may be mine now, but who she is right now is because of you." She leaned her head into my hand, a soft gleam in her eyes.

"You may not have been here for her physically, but trust me she's learned a lot from the stories I've told her about you." I couldn't hide the smile growing on my face. Most of my life I'd felt useless like I was just a big burden, but Clarke had always made me feel like I was so much more than that. She's always fought for me, even when no one else did. She raised an eyebrow looking over her shoulder towards the door. "Do you think they got everything under control?"

I rolled my eyes staring back down at her. "It's Madi, of course, she got it done." She smiled tilting her head to the side, pressing her cheek to my chest. I threw my head back into my pillow, my fingers running up and down Clarke's spine. She shifted beside me, a soft moan slipping through her lips. I instantly sat up, one hand landing on her lower back to support her as she moved. "Are you okay?"

She quietly shifted her weight to the palms of her hands trying to pull herself up. I kept my hand on her back to support her in silence. Once she leaned her back against the wall she let out a deep breath, her chest quickly rising and falling. I propped myself up on my elbow, gently massaging her thigh with my free-hand. "I just hate being stuck like this." She pulled up her other knee pressing it against her chest, leaning her head on her knee. "Raven will be good within a few hours. You're almost healed and ready to get back to work. Octavia will be healed within a few weeks."

I grabbed her hand, pulling her attention back to me. "You've been taking care of everyone else for a long time, I think it's time everyone else takes care of you." I brought her hand to my lips, lacing kisses across her knuckles. She pushed the hair off my forehead, her fingers lowering to run along the line of my jaw.

I pressed another sloppy kiss to her knuckles, trailing them up her arm. Once I reached the corner where her shoulder met the base of her neck I stopped taking a look up at her sitting with a large smile on her face and her eyes squeezed shut. There were bruises across her face, but the smile on her face overshadowed them. The cuts on her lips nonexistent while they were curled tightly, showing the crowns of her teeth. After she realized I'd stopped she opened her eyes, looking down at me with a burning desire. I pressed a heavy kiss into her neck, slowly making my way up to the back of her ear.

I grabbed her hair pulling it off the back of her neck, but the door swung open slamming loudly into the wall. Both of jumped at the abrupt entrance. I shifted a little further from Clarke until I saw Madi walking in, her shirt stained with some blood. I could see the shift in Clarke's face as she took in Madi's appearance. Madi was followed by Monty, Miller, and Murphy.

"Are you okay? Who did this to you?" She reached her arm out quickly tugging Madi closer to her, feeling under her shirt and checking the damage. Madi rolled her eyes standing with her hands on her hips, her head tilted to the side. "Madi Blake. You better tell me who the hell did this to you or so help me." I couldn't help but smile at the sound of Clarke angrily using Madi's full name. Madi Blake. Clarke caught a glimpse of me smiling, her glare instantly redirecting to me. "Bellamy," she yelled.

"Clarke," I smiled. She brought her attention back to Madi, running her fingers along the circular mark on her side. "Madi Blake, huh?" Miller, Murphy, and Monty all exchanged a few smiles, careful not to be caught by Clarke.

Clarke paused, her head turning back towards me. A shocked look on her face. She quickly redeemed herself, clearing her throat and pushing her shoulders back. "She is your daughter, isn't she?"

Madi smirked up at me. "Of course, she's my daughter. Just look at that Blake smirk." Clarke and Madi simultaneously rolled their eyes. She really was a spitting image of Clarke, the way she walks, talks, and the way she carries herself.

Clarke focused her attention back to Madi, picking up some cloth from a table beside her. She began to clean Madi's wound, but she squirmed away from her grasp. "Stop. Stop. I'm fine." Clarke narrowed her eyes down, her eyebrows knit close enough to where the wrinkle formed right above her nose. Madi shifted her weight from one foot to the other, ducking her head in front of her. She peeked up at Clarke through her long, dark lashes. "I'm sorry."

I patted the bed in front of me. If there was a story behind that cut, she needs some distance between her and Clarke. She walked around our bed, taking off her shoes before taking a seat on my shins. It was relaxing to have some weight on my legs. Clarke crossed her arms in front of her, folding her good leg beneath herself. I turned back towards Madi who sat in front of me, her chin resting on her knees. "Now tell us, who did that to you?"

She looked over her shoulder, a nervous look in her eyes. Looking back at me, she took in a deep breath. "Bishop." I could feel Clarke's muscles clench at the sound of his name. I grabbed her wrist, gently rubbing the inside with my thumb. But that wasn't enough to release some tension in her body.

"How the hell did he get to you? Weren't you supposed to be in the vents?" Octavia was nearly yelling. I looked over to see her struggling to sit up. Raven sat up in her bed beside me. Their eyes filled with fury. "No. Tell me who the hell let him get close to you? Who were you with?" I saw Miller's head drop as he looked down at his feet. Monty and Murphy each mimicking his stance. Once Octavia sat up there was a different tension in the room. Clarke's breathing became heavier.

"All you were supposed to do was drop in the gas and sneak out. Azuma and Kane were supposed to lead the guards in to put the prisoners back in their cells, so will one of you idiots explain to me how Bishop got the chance to attack Madi." Raven's tone matched Octavia's as she yelled at Monty, Murphy, and Miller standing on the other end of the room. Miller rubbed the back of his neck. Murphy pressed his lips into a hard line. Monty clasped his hands together in front of him.

"It's not their fault," Madi yelled defensively, quickly standing in front of them. "It was my own fault." Clarke released a deep breath, her hand shaking beneath my hand. As much as I wanted to be angry too, I think Madi doesn't need an angry parent. It's already hard enough with Clarke, Octavia, and Raven mad at her. Octavia's eyes softened as she stared up at Madi. "I was the one who jumped out of the vent. None of them knew until it was too late."

Clarke swallowed the lump in her throat, pulling her hand out of my grip. "Why would you do something so stupid?" I looked over at her hoping to catch her gaze, but her eyes were focused on Madi.

Madi tightened her hands into two tight fists. "Because Bishop deserves to pay for everything he's done." She huffed out some air, Miller stepped forward wrapping his arm around Madi's shoulders. She shrugged him off quickly storming out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

Murphy instantly ran after her. Before I even got the chance to move Clarke was already jumping out of bed trying to run after Madi, but with her hurt leg, she instantly fell. Miller moved to her side trying to help her up, but she pushed him away screaming. I hopped out of bed, carefully walking around to her side. Clarke looked up from her leg, pure anger in her eyes. "Take me to her. Now." I wrapped my arm around her waist, helping her up. Miller and Monty moved onto either side of us to help, but Clarke just pushed them both off. "Back off."

I turned towards Miller, glaring up at him. "Tell me what the hell happened." Setting Clarke back into bed I sat at the edge of her bed carefully massaging her leg. She was out of breath, but her eyes remained on Miller and Monty.

"She jumped down into the prison block after we threw the cans. She just took my gun and jumped before I could get her." Miller stood at the foot of Clarke's bed, avoiding the sharp looks coming from Raven and Octavia. "When she got down there I couldn't see her, but she found Bishop. Her suit saved her, but she got Bishop. She wants to make him suffer for what he's done."

We all exchanged a look. The anger in Clarke, Octavia, and Raven's faces shifted to a look of disappointment. "Take us there. Now," Octavia yelled. Miller squeezed his eyes shut, squeezing the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

Monty cleared his throat. "We can't." Raven quickly stood up walking towards Monty pressing him into the wall behind him.

Miller tried to rip her off of him, but Raven quickly threw her leg back at into his groin, earning a loud groan. "The hell you can't." She had the collar of Monty's shirt balled up into her fist. "You're going to take all of us there. Right now."

Monty frantically nodded as Raven released his shirt. Madi slowly walked through the door, Murphy's hand carefully placed on her shoulder. She let out a deep sigh before looking back around the room. "He's a burden. He's only ever done things to hurt us. We needed to get rid of him," she mumbled.

I slowly stood up, ignoring the pain shooting throughout my body as I slowly limped towards her. Wrapping my hands around her face I brought her eyes up to meet mine. "I know how you feel. I let my need for revenge put me on the wrong side. I don't want that for you." A tear slipped down her cheek, her eyes squeezing shut. I wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Madi there are some lines you can't uncross." I pulled her into a tight embrace, holding onto the back of her neck.

"Why didn't you talk to us?" Clarke's voice echoed through the silenced room. Madi pulled away looking over my shoulder at Clarke. She silently stood there staring at Clarke, a guilty look in her eyes. Clarke held out her hand.

Madi stepped towards her carefully taking her hand. She was instantly yanked into a tight hug, muffled sobs coming from her mouth. Clarke rubbed her back in an attempt to comfort her. "I thought I could bear the burden, so you wouldn't have to."

Clarke pulled away staring down at Madi's tear-stained face. "Madi. I was wrong. No one person should have to face it alone." She glanced up at me, a sad look in her eyes. "Remember what I told you what happened after I came back? I told you that wasn't the answer. We work better together."

"Together," Madi mumbled.

"Together," everyone chanted in unison. That had become our motto since we'd all gotten back together. We all needed each other. We weren't nearly as powerful individually as we were together. It's sad that it's taken us this long to realize it, but it's true.

The atmosphere in the room cooled down once Clarke lets go of Madi allowing her to calm down. I patiently leaned against the wall watching everyone fall back into place around me. Monty, Miller, and Murphy took a seat on a cot set up in the corner of the room. Raven sat back down at the edge of her bed, her head resting in the palms of her hands.

"Take us to him. It's time we make him pay." I looked up to see Octavia trying to get up, but soon the door swung open. Azuma rushing to Octavia's side, pressing her shoulders back into the mattress.

As Octavia struggled Azuma held her down tightly. "You're not going anywhere like that, Heda." There was a teasing undertone to his voice. Octavia stopped fighting against him, relaxing her body beneath him. Azuma took a seat at the edge of her bed brushing some hair out of her face. He undid the braids in her hair, running his fingers through her tangles. "You need to rest."

Octavia rolled her eyes as she stared up at him. "A warrior never sits back when there is a war within the walls of her empire."

Azuma let out a brief chuckle continuing to take the tangles out of her hair. "You're not a warrior. You're the commander." Octavia squeezed her eyes shut temporarily throwing her head back in frustration. Azuma began to braid her hair back, so it was out of her face. He took good care of her, it was clear he cared about her. I can tell from the way he looked at her, it's the way Lincoln once looked at her. "The commander can do no good to her people if she refuses to allow her body to heal her battle wounds."

After he finished braiding her hair he pressed a kiss to her forehead. He tucked the corners of her blanket beneath her before turning back towards us. I hadn't realized I was staring until he turned to look back at me. "Take us to Bishop." He looked around from Madi to Murphy to Monty to Miller, his nerves getting the best of him. "Yes, we know. And I want you to take us to him."

"Fine." Octavia scoffed from behind him, but she can't do much. The longest she's been able to sit up is a few minutes. Abby won't allow her to put that much pressure on her hip. Azuma looked over his shoulder at Octavia. "I'll tie you down if I have to," he threatened. Octavia rested her hands beneath her head closing her eyes, completely disregarding his comment. Azuma turned back towards Miller and Murphy. "Get them wheelchairs and bring them down. Monty, we need you to do a quick security checkup to make sure everything is working as it should."

Monty nodded quickly making his way out the door behind Azuma. Murphy grabbed a wheelchair bringing it towards me. "I don't need a wheelchair. I'm fine."

"Get in the wheelchair. You can barely hold up your own weight," Clarke argued. Letting out a deep sigh I did as I was told. I'm not a child. I know what I can handle. I can handle walking all the way downstairs by myself. But if there was one thing I was sure of, it's not to argue with Clarke. We usually saved any arguing for later, when we were alone. It was best that way.

Murphy began pushing me out the door, Raven and Madi walking a safe distance behind us. Miller pushed Clarke down the hallways behind us. The only thing I can think about right now is what I'm going to do once I get my hands on him. Where should I start? All I know is I want to make sure he suffers. Maybe I should make him relive the things he'd done to me. Starting when we were alone, ending with leaving him to bleed out by himself. No. that's too easy.

We quickly reached the door to the interrogation room. I should have known they'd bring him here. Before Murphy could punch in the code I stood up, carefully holding up my weight. I can't show any sign of me being weak. I don't want Bishop thinking he's won by seeing me in a wheelchair. "What are you doing? Sit down."

"No. He needs to see that I'm stronger than he is, that I won, that now it's my turn to make him suffer." Adrenaline ran through my body giving me the strength to stand stronger and taller. "If I need to take a seat. I will. But not yet." Murphy stepped back pulling the wheelchair out of the way.

I opened the door to the interrogation room to see Bishop standing in the middle with a scalpel held up against Luke's neck. Before I could step forward Madi weaved forward jumping in front of me. She slid across the floor, taking Bishop off guard. Nailing him straight in the shins he instantly hit the floor. Luke fell forward grasping onto his neck for dear life. Madi quickly stood up whipping out her sword and holding it against Bishop's neck. I stood there watching her stand above Bishop. She had no emotions, she felt no remorse.

Bishop shifted the hand with the scalpel out from underneath himself, but before he could do anything with it I pressed my foot into his wrist. He let out a loud grunt, struggling to move underneath Madi's sword. Once his eyes caught onto mine they widened. He looked me up and down, shock plastered across his face. I smirked down at him, tilting my head to the side. "Surprised to see me?" He didn't say anything, instead, he let all the muscles in his body relax as if accepting his fate. "I think it's time we have our fun with you."


	40. Chapter 40

**Sanity**

 **Madi:**

Bellamy turned around punching in the code to the room. The door sliding open to reveal Bishop standing there with a scalpel held against Luke's neck, Jones lying on the ground beside them with his arms wrapped his stomach his blood pouring out everywhere. Without any hesitation, I pushed past Bellamy sliding across the floor, straight for Bishop's shins to take him out. Once he hit the floor I jumped to my feet pulling out a sword and holding the tip to his throat. I could hear everyone moving around the room, but the only thing I could see was the fear in Bishop's eyes as I stood above him.

It took every ounce of me not to pierce this sword right through Bishop's neck. The only thing that stopped me was Bellamy standing beside me. He's right. We will do this together. I slowly stepped away making my way towards Luke who was sitting against the wall near the door. His head was tucked between his knees, his breathing was heavy. Harper, Miller, and Azuma rushed Jones out of the room. I kneeled in front of Luke placing my hand on his knee. "Are you okay?" Without a word, he looked up pulling me into a tight hug. It took me a few seconds to realize what was happening before I wrapped my arms around him too. I rubbed the back of his head. "It's okay."

Luke had been a member of the guard, but he had never actually had to fight anyone. He only joined guard training recently. He didn't fight when we raided the ship to get Bellamy back, he hadn't fought in any of Skaikru's wars. Before Praimfaya he was only one of Abby's apprentices learning to become a doctor. He never had to deal with any of this before.

He slightly shuddered as I ran my hand up and down his back. His eyes shifting back and forth from my face to Bishop's face. "Thank you." All I could manage to do was nod in response. There was fear in his voice. A tone I'd never heard before. The image of Bishop holding a scalpel to Luke's neck replayed in my head and my blood began to boil again. Luke grabbed my shoulders, slowly massaging them in an effort to calm me down. "I'm alive right now because of you." It's like he knew what I was thinking without me having to say anything. He gazed up at me, continuing to rub the tension from my shoulders.

I moved out of his hold, the anger still burning through me. "You should go get some rest." I sat back on my heels giving him room to get up, but he didn't. I avoided his stare looking back over at everyone else creating a wall between us and Bishop.

I leaned forward, ready to stand up when Luke wrapped his hand around my wrists, tugging me back towards him "No. I'm going to stay here with you." I looked up at him through my eyelashes, his gaze was different now. He looked vulnerable. I weakly smiled at him before shifting to his side, leaning my back against the wall.

We sat together in silence, our eyes focused on everyone ahead of us. Murphy, Raven, Miller, and Emori were standing side by side with their backs facing us. Clarke was sitting in front of Bishop, stitching up his wound. Bellamy protectively stood over her his arms folded in front of him. I couldn't see their faces, but I could feel their anger vibrating throughout the room. How they managed to stand there and fix him after everything he'd done is beyond me. All I want to do is make him suffer.

I turned my head towards Luke, his eyes were already fixated on me. He pressed his lips together, a dimple forming at the corner of his mouth. "Why did you attack him? He could have hurt you." His voice was low, almost at a whisper. Just loud enough so I could hear it.

I bit down on my lip. I don't know. It was just an instinct. Seeing Bishop holding a scalpel to Luke's neck was scary. The thought of anything happening to him was scary. My body just immediately knew to attack. Seeing the fear in Luke's eyes as he stood in the middle of the room just instantly made me want to tear Bishop's throat out. "I guess it was just a reflex. Trying to save you just felt like the right thing to do." His eyes shifted to the floor in front of him, his head turning back towards everyone else.

Silence fell between us once again. I tilted my head back against the wall embracing this moment. Once Clarke was done I'd need to be there. But right now, I just needed to be there for Luke. He needs a friend right now.

Once it seemed like Clarke was almost done stitching Bishop up I turned towards Luke, his eyes focused on the ceiling. I placed my hand on his knee, his eyes shifting down to meet mine. As much as I want to be here for him I have to be there for my family too. As if reading my mind, he nodded his head towards the other side of the room. I pulled him into another tight hug before standing up. This hug was warm, refreshing even. I made my way towards Bellamy and Clarke carefully making my way through Emori and Murphy.

There was tension in the air as they all stood around Bishop. Everyone watched Clarke's every move as she finished patching him up. Everyone stood in the same intimidating stance with their arms folded across their chest and their eyes narrowed. Bishop kept his eyes low, careful not to make eye contact with anyone. I stood beside Bellamy, mimicking his stance and expression as I stared at Bishop.

"I think we should sentence him to a death by a thousand cuts." I could feel everyone's eyes shift onto me, but I kept my eyes on Bishop. He stared up at me, complete fear in his eyes. I smirked down at him. "We start by setting you on fire. That way we'll know what's louder, the crack of the fire or your screams." Bishop's eyes widened. "Once you're a little crisp we'll cut off your tongue, so you can't scream anymore. Normally we'd take your eyes out too, but I want you to be able to see. I want to see your eyes widen from the pain. I want to see the tears pour down your face." I felt a hand on my shoulder, gently squeezing me. Bellamy. I ignored it shifting closer to Bishop. "Since we won't be gouging out your eyes we'll cut off your hands. Then we'll cut you a thousand times before someone decides to put you out of your misery and actually kill you." Bishop's eyes frantically looked around the room. He looked at everyone but me. "But..."

I was cut off when Clarke turned her head towards me, a threatening look in her eyes. "Enough Madi." How could she remain so calm? How can she sit here and act like he's done nothing wrong? Bellamy tightened his grip on my shoulder not allowing me to move. "We're going to make him suffer, but if you're going to act like that I'm going to leave you with Abby." I turned towards Bellamy, but not even he was going to argue with Clarke about this. She turned back towards Bishop pushing her hair behind her ear. "But we will hurt you and heal you until we feel like you've had enough." His body began to shake, and tears continued pouring down his cheeks.

Bellamy let out a heavy laugh, his hands shooting to his sides from the pain. "You thought you were so good at torturing us." He continued to laugh, gasping for air from laughing so hard. "You thought you were so good at torturing us, but the truth is you have no idea." His face became serious again as he narrowed his eyes down at Bishop, a threatening look in his eyes. "You're going to wish you were dead."

"Please. I'll do anything. Just don't do this," Bishop pleaded. He looked around at everyone standing around the room, but no one did anything. We all wanted him dead. He's done more to us in these past few weeks than anyone had done in the past 6 years. "I have kids. You're parents. My kids don't have a mom. She died. Please. Don't let them become orphans."

Clarke leaned to the side, pressing her elbow into the armrest. "You should have thought about that before." Tears continued pouring down Bishop's face as he stared at her. "I'll be sure to tell them everything you did."

Bellamy walked towards Clarke pulling a knife out of her boot. "Where should I start?" Bellamy tapped the end of the knife against his chin, a mischievous smile on his face.

"Rip off his nails. It's slow and painful, but not painful enough to kill him." Murphy stood beside Bellamy grabbing Bishop's hand. He took the knife from Bellamy's hand slowly using the edge of the knife to peel back the end of his nail. Bishop's screams echoed throughout the room, but it wasn't enough to stop Murphy. He continued peeling off all his nails revealing the delicate tissue beneath it. Bishop hopelessly fought against the restraints, but it was useless. Murphy looked back up at him, a taunting smirk on his face. "This is only the beginning."

Murphy slowly tore back each nail on his left hand. Bishop continued to shriek. "God. Someone shut him up," Raven yelled. Immediately Emori began looking through the drawers around the room pulling out a large cloth. She made her way behind Bishop placing the cloth in his mouth and tying it behind his head instantly muffling his screams. Now the sound of Murphy tearing off his nails became more distinct. A painful sound that sent chills down my spine.

"Do we have a stun stick?" Bellamy asked as he looked through the drawers. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Luke stand up, but I kept my eyes focused on Bishop.

"I have one," Luke spoke up. He unlocked the baton, the sound of the electricity powering up within the stick overpowered the sound of Bishop's nails being torn off. Bellamy awkwardly nodded, his eyes shifting back and forth from Luke to me.

Bellamy nodded his head in Bishop's direction. "I think you deserve a few hits too." Luke stared back and forth between Bellamy and Bishop, a scared look in his eyes. He was never one to do anything like this. Luke was a good fighter sure, but he was more defensive than offensive. He's never been one to willingly hurt anyone.

He stood there completely frozen. I took a few steps towards him carefully placing my hand on his shoulder. I kept my eyes focused on him, avoiding the piercing look Bellamy was giving me. Luke turned his head towards me, his muscles slightly relaxed, but the fear was still burning through his eyes. He quickly turned back towards Bishop, his hand tightening around the baton in his hand. He rammed the baton as hard as he could into Bishop's side earning a scream so loud it could be heard through the cloth in his mouth.

Silence fell around the room. We watched as the life left Bishop's eyes, his eyes fluttering before he became unconscious. Clarke turned her wheelchair to face everyone else. "Tie him up. I want to make him feel the same way I did." Everyone quickly began to move doing as Clarke said. "Spread his arms and legs out as far as you can." Murphy finished tearing off his last nail before standing up and pulling Bishop's limp body from the chair. Emori pulled out some ropes from the drawers while Raven helped Murphy hold Bishop up. Bellamy quickly began tying him up spreading his legs apart. Clarke rolled herself in front of Bishop, I quickly stood behind her watching everyone finish tying him up.

Bellamy pulled up a chair beside Clarke. He leaned forward pressing his elbows into his knees, his head tilted up towards Bishop. Murphy and Emori stood on one side of Bishop while Raven stood across from them. Raven leaned up against the cold metal walls. "I think we should start with a shock treatment," she broke the silence. Everyone looked over at her and back to Bishop. Luke cautiously made his way beside me, a comforting gesture.

"He's weak. He can barely handle being shocked by the stun stick. It's a waste if he's going to constantly pass out," Murphy mumbled. He was right. Bishop is weak. Sure, being shocked was painful, but it wasn't that bad.

Raven opened her mouth to argue, but Clarke interrupted her. "He's right. We want to make him feel pain, but he needs to be awake for it." She brought her hand up to her chin, running her index finger along the base of her cheek. "I think death by a thousand cuts sounds just right. But we should test his boundaries. See what makes him pass out and what he can handle. By the looks of it, he can't handle much."

"They were in space. They weren't trained to endure pain like we've adapted to handle. So, we need to weaken our torture methods if you want the full satisfaction." Abby spoke from the doorway of the room. Her eyes trained on Bishop's body hanging on the other end. "This doesn't mean I agree with your need for revenge." Kane stepped up behind Abby. He placed his hand on her shoulder, running his thumb over her shoulder.

"It's not like they're going to torture all of the prisoners. Just the one who deserves it the most." Kane had changed a lot since Praimfaya. Clarke always explained him to be one to work by the book and do things morally, but a piece of that has gone. Kane guided Abby into the room, the door shutting behind them. "You can start with a thousand cuts, see how he reacts to it. But if that doesn't work I say medical procedures are your best bet."

Bellamy stood up looking back and forth from Bishop to Abby. "But couldn't a medical procedure just kill him immediately? What's the point in that?"

"Not necessarily. If you cut his spinal cord, you'll leave him immobile. If you really want him to suffer then you can do that and leave him out to fend for himself. He'll die of hunger or thirst if the boars out there don't get to him first," Abby said. He could go out and die a slow and painful death, but we wouldn't be able to witness it. The life leaving his eyes, the pain he feels from watching himself deteriorate, the fear of dying.

Everyone exchanged looks, contemplating Abby's plan. "We will try it our way first. If he really is as weak as he seems then we'll do it your way." Clarke turned back towards Bellamy, he confirmed her response with a nod.

Kane walked up towards Luke placing a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay? Azuma told me what happened?"

"I'm fine. I'm lucky Madi was there to save me." Kane released his shoulder allowing Luke to wrap his arm around my shoulder.

Bellamy cleared his throat, immediately Luke dropped his arm awkwardly taking a few steps away from me. "Time to wake him up, Madi." He drew out my name, the tension clear in his voice. We're just friends. Why was he acting like this? It's nothing. Even if I did like him, it didn't matter. We're just friends.

I quickly turned on my heels ducking my head as I walked around Bellamy and towards Bishop. I looked over at Emori and Murphy. Emori had a wide grin on her face while Murphy was glaring at Luke the same way I'd assume Bellamy was. Raven lightly laughed as she made her way to my side. "Am I getting the idea that Luke isn't just a friend?" Her voice was low enough so only I could hear it. Bellamy and Clarke fell into a deep conversation with Abby and Kane about their plan, Murphy and Emori were arguing about something in the corner of the room.

"No. We're just friends," I reassured. But Raven wasn't having it, she stared at Luke for a few seconds before bringing her attention back to me. "Only friends, Raven."

"He's pretty cute. Definitely reminds me a lot of young Bellamy." She let out a slight laugh, continuing to stare at Luke awkwardly standing amongst the adults. "He's definitely cute enough to be a lady's man, but I see the way he looks at you." I stared at Raven, but she was focused on Luke. Does he look at me? How? I felt my blood rush to my face. "He looks at you the same way Bellamy did before Praimfaya. Hopelessly in love with no way to say it."

I tilted my head to the side to catch a glimpse of Luke, his eyes were focused on me. His arms were folded in front of his chest. I turned back towards Raven shaking my head. "He's not in love with me. We're just friends."

Raven rolled her eyes. "He loves you and I just might kill him for it." Murphy pressed his hands into my shoulders, his thumbs making small circles into my shoulder blades. "That is if Bellamy doesn't kill him first."

"If either of you touches that boy Emori and I will kill you ourselves." Murphy rolled his eyes, tilting his head to the side to look at Emori. "Let the girl live."

"Fine. But if he hurts you, I'll hurt him." Murphy dropped his hands from my shoulders turning towards Bishop. "Now, you heard Bellamy. Time to wake him up." He took the knife from my hand cutting off his shirt. He placed the knife back into the palm of my hand. "Wake him up."

I took the knife digging a line from his collarbone down to his waist. His eyes immediately shot open, his muffled screams bringing Bellamy and Clarke's attention back to the back of the room. Bellamy placed his hands on his hips, leaning his weight to one side as he glared at the four of us. "Not what I meant when I said wake him up."

Shrugging my shoulders in response I dug the knife across his chest once again crossing over the line that I had already made. His blood dripped down his chest, he continued to scream. I turned back towards Bellamy, but there was a lighter look in his eyes now. Slightly more amused. "I thought we were going to check his boundaries." I turned to look back at Bishop, his eyes squeezed shut with soft groans slipping through his lips. "So far so good."

Bellamy stepped forward taking the knife from my hand. He pressed the knife into his arm, making a deep cut from his biceps to his triceps. More blood poured out of him, his blood now dripping onto the floor. "You're not cutting deep enough. You need to see the blood pour out of him."

I turned towards Clarke as she rolled closer towards us, Abby and Kane slipped out of the room behind her. Clarke held out her hand for the knife. Bellamy passed it to her moving out of the way to allow her access. He shifted closer to help her get up, but Clarke quickly threw her hand up to stop him. She stabbed the knife right into his thigh, her eyes focused on his. Slowly she dragged the knife down towards his knee. "I recall this was what you did to me. Was it not?"

Bishop frantically shook his head, hot tears streaming down his face. Clarke left the knife in his leg, sitting back to watch him struggle against the depth of the cut. Murphy ripped the knife out of his leg, fiddling with it in his hand. He stood there contemplating what to do next. He carved a deep 'X' into his chest, the same place he'd been shot. "I was shot in the chest because of you."

Emori took the knife from Murphy. She grabbed Bishop's hand running her fingers along his fingertips. Once he focused his attention on his fingers she took the knife and cut off the tip of his index finger. His cries continued to echo within the room. Emori held the knife out for Raven, but she refused. She pulled out a screwdriver holding it up, so everyone could see. Bishop fought against the restraints, but it was useless. Raven rammed the screwdriver through the palm of his hand, twisting it so that he'd feel every inch of it inside of him. His eyes began to flicker when Raven pulled the screwdriver from his hand.

His eyes shut again, his head falling forward against his chest. I threw my hands in the air with frustration. "He's too weak for this. He obviously can't handle anything we do to him."

Bellamy grabbed both of my wrists holding me in place. "This is a slow process. I think you should go get some rest. Go keep your Aunt Octavia company." He began to rub circles on the inside of wrists, a soft smile on his face. He cleared his throat again turning me around to face Luke, his arm protectively wrapped across the front of my chest. "And maybe you can take Luke up to medical to get him checked up." I tilted my head to the side to catch a glimpse of Bellamy, but his eyes were narrowed down at Luke.

"Yes, sir." Luke held out his hand for me. I glanced over at Bellamy who was glaring at Luke. If only Bellamy knew how scared Luke already was of our family, especially Bellamy. Of course, the mighty Wanheda and Skairipa were intimidating, but Bellamy usually intimidated people with a purpose. I guess as my dad he had the right. He did it to Octavia so obviously he'd do it to me too.

I turned towards Bellamy to see Murphy hovering close behind him with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. I leaned up towards Bellamy's cheek pressing a kiss to his cheek. "Stop trying to scare him. He's already scared of you," I whispered in his ear, earning a tight smirk in response.

Bellamy leaned down pressing a kiss to my temple. "He should be," he whispered in my ear. I let out a light laugh before moving past Bellamy and to Murphy. Murphy's eyes never left Luke as I hugged him, his arms squeezing me a little tighter than normal.

I made my way across to room to Clarke, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Radio me when he wakes up?" She nodded in response giving my forearm a squeeze.

I quickly rushed over towards Luke grabbing him by his forearm and pulling him away from a very threatening Bellamy and an angry Murphy. I just hope Clarke and Octavia are more understanding. Even if Raven says he likes me it doesn't matter because right now we're just friends. I feel like I've said that more in the past few days that it had come to mean nothing.

We walked in silence towards the stairwell, but once the door shut Luke let out a deep breath. I turned to see him squeeze his eyes shut, leaning his back against the door. Once his eyes flickered open her flashed me a look of relief. "You know your dad wants to kill me, right?" I let out a lighthearted laugh, rolling my eyes in response. "Seriously. Bellamy and Murphy stare at me like they want to rip my heart right out of my chest."

I turned back towards the stairs slowly making my way down. "Oh please. If they wanted to hurt you they'd make you suffer much more than that." I peeked over my shoulder to see him hesitate as he made his way down the stairs. I tried to fight the smile growing on my face, but I couldn't. He was so scared of Bellamy it was too hilarious to ignore. "I'm kidding. They don't want to kill you."

"They do. I know it." I stopped in front of the door to the medical wing when I felt him standing inches away from me. The heat from his body radiating off of him. He tugged my wrist pulling me around to look at him.

"They know you're one of my...best friends. They wouldn't hurt you." There was a pained look in his eyes as he stared down at me. I could feel his hand loosen around my wrist. I placed my hand on top of his giving him a squeeze. "You mean a lot to me. They know that. They're just a little overprotective."

His eyes momentarily fell to my lips before meeting my gaze again. "You mean a lot to me too." He stepped a little closer. Almost like a reaction, I stepped back ramming my back into the door handle, letting out a low grunt. His hand immediately rushed to my lower back gently rubbing it. "Are you okay?"

I nodded placing my hand on the door handle. "I think we need to get you checked out." I snapped my head back around, the ends of my hair hitting Luke's face as I quickly slipped out of the door. I felt the blood rush to my face, but I kept my eyes forward hoping Luke hadn't noticed.

Once we made it into medical Luke took a seat beside Jones' bed while I looked for Jackson. I found Jackson sitting at a desk in the corner of medical, his legs propped up on the table. Miller sat beside him with his head propped up in the palm of his hand as his elbow leaned against the desk. They looked like they were deep in a conversation. I awkwardly cleared my throat earning their attention immediately. "Madi, is everything okay?" Miller quickly stood up, his brows drawn closely together as he looked me over.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was wondering if you could check Luke out. I don't think anything is wrong with him, but Bellamy told me to bring him up here to get him checked out." Jackson quickly stood up making his way towards Luke.

I made my way towards Octavia's room as Miller stood there watching Jackson work. As I slipped through the door to her room I saw that she was fast asleep. She was lying on her side, Azuma lied close behind her. His face was buried into her neck with his arm draped over her waist. Octavia wrapped both her arms around his. They looked at peace.

I turned back to the door to leave when I heard Octavia's voice croak. "Madi. You can stay."

When I turned to look back at her she flashed me a soft smile, her eyes barely cracked open. "It's okay. You two sleep. I'll be back later." She closed her eyes again leaning back into Azuma. It was weird to see Octavia so calm and collected. She was only ever this way with Azuma. I like him, he doesn't really give away his feelings much and he may not always be so involved in everything, but I know he's good. Good for our people, good at being a leader, good for our family, but especially good for Octavia.

 **Bellamy:**

I don't know how I feel about Madi watching this happen. I know she can handle it, she's a Blake after all. But she shouldn't have to. We can bring her in when we're going to kill him, but I don't want her to be here while we actually torture him. I'm sure Clarke doesn't either. She's 14 and I will protect her as long as I can from all of this.

I grabbed Madi by her wrists, holding her in front of me. "This is a slow process. I think you should go get some rest. Go keep your Aunt Octavia company." I softly rubbed her wrists hoping she'll agree to let us handle things down here for a while. She may be young, but she's as stubborn as ever. Probably even more stubborn than Clarke. I cleared my throat, turning Madi around to face Luke. I know he's a good kid, but I can't find it in me to let her be friends with him. If he's anything like I was when I first came down, he'd be trouble. I wrapped my arm around Madi's shoulders holding her close to me. Luke kept his eyes on me, not once glancing down at Madi. Smart boy. "And maybe you can take Luke up to medical to get him checked up." I could feel Madi glance up at me, but I continued staring at Luke. If this kid makes a move on Madi I might just kill him.

"Yes, sir." Luke held out his hand. Madi glanced up at me again. I could tell she was glaring, but I ignored it. I'll have my talk with her once everything here is done. I can give her the same restrictions I gave Octavia when we landed. Maybe that way Luke will keep his distance. Luke and whatever boy or girl thinks they can try anything with my daughter.

Madi turned around pressing her hands into my shoulder. She leaned up on the tips of her toes to press a kiss to my cheek. As she began to lower herself she whispered in my ear, "Stop trying to scare him. He's already scared of you," I couldn't hold back my satisfaction as I stared down at her.

I leaned down pressing a kiss to her temple. "He should be," I whispered in her ear. She began to lightly laugh before making her way around me to greet everyone else. I glared at Luke, but he was putting up a good fight. I have to admit the boy had guts, but I'd never actually say it out loud. He needs to fear me. Every boy and girl who even wants to be friends with Madi needs to fear me.

Murphy stepped up beside me, mimicking my stance as he stared at Luke. Now Luke's eyes bounced back and forth from Murphy and me. If he was scared, he was good at not showing it. Madi came running past us grabbing Luke's arm and dragging him out as soon as possible. She flashed us a smile before the door closed.

Murphy and I exchanged a smirk before turning back towards Clarke, Emori, and Raven all huddled together sharing an in-depth conversation. I placed my hand on Clarke's shoulder pulling her from the conversation, she leaned her head against my arm letting out a light sigh. "You should really sit down."

"I won't be able to sit down until he's dead." She placed her hand on mine, running her thumb along my knuckles. "I sent Madi up to sleep so we can continue. I know she's a badass warrior or whatever, but..."

"I know. She doesn't know how bad it can actually get. She's already becoming so cold. I don't want that for her." Clarke looked over her shoulder shooting me a sad look. I released her shoulder taking a few steps towards Bishop, his blood has slowly dried up on his chest. "I think my mom is right." I glanced back at her, there was a sad look on her face. This was hard on her. After everything he'd done to her I hate that there's nothing I can do to fix it. She's damaged and I can't do anything to help her. "I think we should cut his spinal cord and watch him suffer."

I stepped back towards her, kneeling in front of her taking her hand in mine. "Clarke." I tilted my head to the side trying to grasp why she wanted to let things be so easy. "If you can't do this..."

"No. It's not that I can't. I won't do this." She raised her voice, the anger radiating from the tone of her voice. "I'm not being weak because I want to leave him out there to suffer."

I clasped both of my hands around hers. Everyone else stood around the room in silence. "I'm not saying you're weak. I just think if you don't want to do this you should let me."

She ripped her hand out of mine. Her eyebrows drew closer together, pure anger beaming through her eyes. "I want him to suffer. But what's the point in wasting so much time trying to make him do that? It's time to move on." She turned her head towards Raven who stood in the corner with her eyes focused on the floor. "Radio my mom and get a camera set up outside of the ship so we can watch him." Raven quickly made her way out of the room. Emori and Murphy picked up the radio slipping out closely behind her to radio Abby.

Clarke moved her hands to the tires of her wheelchair, but before she could get anywhere I grabbed both tires. "You're right." She looked back at me, a surprised look on her face. "We need to move on. We need to focus on our people. We need to focus on getting things ready for winter." She released the tires placing her hands back into her lap. I grabbed both of her hands running my thumbs along her knuckles. "So. I'm looking to you, Princess."

"My mom is going to cut part of his spinal cord, so he'll be immobile. Raven is going to set up a camera, so we can get a full view of him at all hours of the day." She shifted her weight from one side to the other, a groan slipping through her lips. "I just want to move on from all of this. I want all of their people gone. I want to just forget any of this happened."

A tear slipped down her cheek. I reached up wiping it from her face. "I know, I know." I wrapped my hand behind her neck pulling her into my shoulder, she quickly wrapped her arms around me. Her sobs continuing as her tears seeped through my shirt. "We will get over this. I promise." I rubbed the back of her neck, holding her carefully in my arms.

She released her grip on me allowing me to fall back to my knee in front of her. She wiped her face with the back of her sleeve swallowing the lump in her throat. Clearing her throat, she held her hand out. "Give me the knife." I simply obliged grabbing the knife from the stand sitting in the corner of the room, placing it in the palm of her hand. She took the knife ramming it into his side with all the force within her. Bishop's eyes shot wide open, his breath hitching from the pain. She tilted her head back to get a better look at him, a sinister smile on her face. I stepped forward placing my hand on hers tightening her grip on the knife. Together we dragged the knife across his stomach the same way he had done to me. Now his screams became louder, not even the gag was enough to muffle his screams. I released Clarke's hand allowing her to pull the knife from his stomach. "Jus drein jus daun."

Bishop's screams continued as Miller, Harper, Murphy, Abby, Jackson, and Emori all entered. Once they all caught a glimpse of Bishop's wound there was a slight hesitation among all of them, but they continued to move in unison. Miller, Harper, and Murphy untied him pulling him to the ground beside them. Emori, Abby, and Jackson began prepping things for his procedure. I pulled Clarke's wheelchair out of the way kneeling by her side, her hand tightly clasped around mine.

Bishop lied on the floor in front of us. Emori cauterized his cuts while Murphy, Harper, and Miller tied his limbs together. They threw him onto his stomach allowing Abby and Jackson full access to his back. Everyone kneeled at Bishop's side. The delinquents were eager to make him suffer. Abby looked nervous as she held the scalpel to his spine. Without any hesitation, Jackson ripped the scalpel from her hand pressing it into his back. Bishop's screams slowly came to an end as he passed out again.

Clarke let out a loud chuckle. "Raven had an entire surgery without passing out once and nothing to numb her pain." She continued to laugh, everyone's eyes focused on her. "Justin Bishop. The man who said we'd make the strongest civilization together." I winced at the idea. He's going to suffer now. Clarke continued laughing hysterically, her arms wrapped around her sides to hold herself in place. "Justin Bishop is weak."

There was a silence in the room as Jackson worked on Bishop. I sat back on my heels watching them as I held onto Clarke's hand. My fingers instinctively ran along her knuckles. Clarke would occasionally squeeze my hand, but her eyes never left Bishop. Her other hand was pressed against her cheek, holding her face up as her elbow leaned into the armrest.

Eventually Raven, Harper, and Monty walked in with a tablet in hand. But they silently stood in the corner watching Jackson as he finished everything, quickly stitching him back up. It was like there was nothing left to be said anymore. Bishop was going to die. We're all going to move on.

Jackson looked up at Clarke, letting out a deep sigh. "Okay, it's done. You guys can throw him out."

Raven stepped beside Clarke. She held the tablet out showing a view of someplace outside. "I had Harper set up a few cameras in the forest. We'll have a full view of him while he's out there." She began showing the various cameras with many different angles of the forest. "I even set up a feature for you to taunt him." She pulled a small portable radio set from her pocket placing it in Clarke's hand. "We already have audio and visual of him, but what you don't know is that he can hear you too. If you want." Raven tilted the mouthpiece to the side revealing a small button. "You press and hold this if you want to talk to him. You know say anything your heart desires."

Clarke tightened her grip around the microphone and earpiece. "Thank you, Raven." Raven simply nodded, placing the tablet in her lap before slowly stepping away. Clarke momentarily closed her eyes, inhaling deeply and throwing her head back. Her tongue ran along her bottom lip before she opened her eyes again.

I placed my hand on top of her clenched fist. "I think it's about time we get back to our room. You should get some rest." Clarke nodded hanging her head back down to look at the tablet placed in her hands. She ran tapped away looking at the forest from every angle. I know this won't get any easier any time soon. At Mount Weather she had watched others be tortured, she watched people die. In the City of Light, she fought against one of the most difficult decisions anyone could have faced, but this was different. This time it was personal.

We exchanged goodbyes before making our way up to our room in silence. Clarke was shutting down. She's trying to push me away. The way she always does when something like this happens.

Once we got into our room Clarke tried to stand up, letting out an angry grunt when she couldn't get up on her own. Without a word, I slipped a hand behind her back and gently placed one behind her knee picking her up and placing her on our unmade bed. We hadn't been here in what felt like forever.

I pulled out some disinfectant and fresh bandages for her wounds. She lied her head back against the pillow. Her eyes were fixated on the ceiling as I pulled off her pants checking the large wound on her thigh first. This was the most painful one to see, it never failed to make my heart clench. I poured some disinfectant on the bandage carefully wrapping it around her thigh. She occasionally let out a groan, but always managed to muffle her pain by biting down on her lip. I moved up to the wounds across her chest.

As soon as I made it to her neck she cupped my face in the palm of her hand. Tears streamed down her face. "I don't deserve you," she sobbed. I couldn't move. I couldn't even react. What the hell? I shook my head, pulling it away from her hand. Taking a seat beside her I moved the stray hairs behind her ear. "All of this happened because of me. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you."

I cupped her face in my hands, pressing her cheeks softly. "Stop. Stop doing this to yourself." Her warm tears ran along my hands, I wiped at them with the pads of my thumbs. "You can't push me away this time, Clarke." She closed her eyes, throwing her head back. "I'm here for you. We're all here for you. None of this is your fault unless you let it be. And there's no way in hell I'll let that happen." Her eyes flickered open, the pain clear through her eyes. I released her face focusing my attention back to the bandage on her neck. "You don't get to sit around here feeling bad for yourself. Remember what you said to me? It's time to move on. So, that's exactly what we're going to do. We're going to move on."

She placed her hand on mine stopping me as I rebandaged her. "What if there's just no saving me? What if I'm just destined to be damaged goods?" I felt myself burning with anger, but I pushed it away. This was her trying to push me away. This is her being stupid. I won't let it happen.

I placed my hand on top of hers. "If you're damaged goods, then you're my damaged goods. But I don't care how long it takes. I will always come in to save you." Releasing her hand, I finished bandaging her. I began to tug at the hem of her shirt. "Besides what kind of knight would I be if I let my queen fall." She held her arms above her head allowing me to tug the shirt above her head. Her cheeks turned a rosy color as the blood rushed to her face. A small smile on her face. I quickly grabbed one of my shirts from a drawer, slipping Clarke's dainty figure into it.

As I began to stand up to change my own clothes Clarke's hand desperately clasped around my wrist tugging me back. I sat back down beside her, pushing the hair out of her face. She wrapped her arms around the back of my neck pulling me back in pressing her lips against mine. I leaned forward deepening the kiss. The flavor of Clarke was refreshing. She ran her fingers through my hair. I placed my knee where I had been sitting allowing a safe distance between Clarke and me, careful not to hurt her. She shifted over allowing me to take over her spot and almost instantly she flipped on top of me, straddling her legs on either side of me not once allowing our lips to break apart. I carefully ran my hand along her thigh, gently caressing her wound, wrapping my arm around the back of her leg to support her.

She pulled away, her soft pink lips were swollen and curled tightly into a smile. She tugged at the hem of my shirt gesturing for me to pull it off. I quickly ripped off my shirt throwing it to the side. She ran her fingers down my chest, running through every bump, curve, or indent down to my waist. Whenever her fingers came across a scar she leaned down pressing a kiss to it. My hips instinctively rocked against her hips every time her lips touched my skin. I continued to hold her leg, supporting her every move with one hand. My other hand was tightly gripped onto her waist rubbing small circles around the curve in her hip.

She ripped her shirt off throwing it on the floor beside us revealing her soft, tan skin in nothing, but an Ark issued bra and a pair of briefs provided by medical. I brought my hand to the base of her neck, running my fingers up and down her neck. "You don't have to do this. You should really get some rest."

She rolled her eyes before flinging the back of her hand forward to smack me in the chest. I quickly caught her hand pressing kisses across her knuckles and around to the palm of her hand. "It's not always about you, Bellamy." I continued pressing kissing into her palm making my way up to her wrist, moving further to the inside of her elbow. I slowly sat up the higher I moved up her arm, pressing a kiss from her shoulder to her collarbone. Once I reached the base of her neck I lightly sucked on her skin. A small moan slipped from her mouth followed by a soft whisper, "Bellamy. Please."

Flipping us over I gently laid her head back against the pillow, placing another pillow beneath her leg for support. I continued pressing sloppy kisses up the side of her neck avoiding her bandages. My mouth latched to her skin with every kiss. I reached the base of her ear, gently kissing the soft spot behind it. Nibbling on the bottom of her ear I whispered, "You've got to tell me what you want, Princess."

Another moan slipped through her lips. This moan was softer, needier. She threw her head back, her eyes squeezing shut. "Please," she whispered again.

I continued along her jawline, her breathing becoming heavier as her head fell back harder against the pillow. My lips hovered inches from hers, the heat from her body was beaming off of her. "Tell me, Princess."

She wrapped her hand against the back of my head pulling me against her. Our lips fell into sync. Between each kiss, Clarke whispered, "I...want...you... _now_." I pressed kisses back down her neck, making my way down her chest to her stomach until I made it around her waist. I pressed kisses along the line of her waist from the left to the right. Her moans growing louder with each kiss.

Suddenly, the crack of the radio broke out in the room. The sound of Raven's voice came echoing through the radio. "Everything's done. You can now watch and speak to Bishop as you please. I can come by and show you how to do it again if you want."

I leaned up reaching out for the radio when Clarke's hand wrapped around my jaw pulling me back in. "No. Not again." She pulled me back up pressing a deeper kiss into my lips. Her other leg came to wrap around my waist, pulling me closer. The electricity was burning between us.

The sound of Raven still talking was still ringing around. Without pulling away from Clarke I reached out to the table to grab the radio, shutting it off so that the only sound either of us could hear was our heavy breathing and the loud moans from Clarke. We fell into a smooth motion her hips gliding against mine, our lips swiftly moving with the same pace.

This is how I knew we'd recover. This is how I knew we didn't need anything else. We were each other's safe place. We were each other's sanity. As long as we had each other, we'd be alright.


	41. Chapter 41

**Healing**

 **Luke:**

Bellamy and Murphy stood shoulder to shoulder, scowls across both of their faces. If I wanted to earn their respect I'd need to show that I was just as strong as they were, or at least show them I was. I folded my arms in front of me staring back and forth between the two of them. We stood in silence waiting for the other to break. It took every part of me not break eye contact.

There'd always been stories of the delinquents flying around Wonkru. They were legends. Bellamy and Clarke lead the delinquents through the war with the grounders. All the grounders praised them for their fearlessness. Bellamy lead a group of inexperienced delinquents into a full-fledged war with the grounders. Bellamy was ruthless. I even heard once he hung a guy on a tree for kissing his sister. I felt a chill go through my body at the idea. If he did that for his sister, what would he do to me?

Murphy was a survivor. He'd been tortured by the grounders and managed to make it alive. He was the flamekeeper when Ontari was the commander. He was stronger than he looked. I've heard the stories of him being a cold leader amongst the delinquents, keeping them in line while they worked. Miller was Bellamy's righthand man, one of the best members of the guard. He was one of the few surviving delinquents left and the only delinquent besides the commander in the bunker.

Madi came running over grabbing my forearm and pulling me towards the door. Her long dark hair flew behind her hitting me in the face, the smell of cinnamon filling the air. Once we made it out the door she released my arm walking a safe distance beside me.

Madi is strong, she's more than capable of fighting for herself but that's why I liked her. She was different from the rest of the girls. Most of the grounder girls were cold except for the few I had met in the medical wing of the bunker. Some of the girls from Skaikru were nice, but most of them had turned into mini versions of Glass. All that time in the bunker with nothing to do but gossip and braid each other's hair. But Madi is different, she doesn't care what anyone has to say about her.

We made our way down the hallway towards the stairwell in silence. As soon as the door shut behind me I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. I leaned back into the door trying to catch my breath. Why was I so nervous? I'd been alone with Madi before, but for some reason, it was different now. I like her, but her family hates me. Bellamy and Murphy were probably coming up with ideas on how to make my life hell. I opened my eyes to see Madi staring at me, her soft plump lips curled into a smile. "You know your dad wants to kill me, right?" She started laughing, rolling her eyes at me. I couldn't hold back the smile growing on her face as I watched her laugh. "Seriously. Bellamy and Murphy stare at me like they want to rip my heart right out of my chest."

She turned back towards the stairs slowly descending down as she mumbled, "Oh please. If they wanted to hurt you, they would make you suffer much more than that." I felt my body jolt back as I watched her continue down the stairs, the blood becoming cold beneath my skin. She looked over her shoulder at me flashing me another smile, a small dimple forming on her cheek. She turned back around her hand carefully placed around the railing. "I'm kidding. They don't want to kill you."

I rolled my eyes watching her skip down the stairs. "They do. I know it." We reached the door leading to the medical wing of the ship. I felt my adrenaline kick in instantly my hand reaching out to grab her wrist before she could open the door. I pulled her around to face me. I could see the shock in her soft green eyes as they ran along the curves of my face.

"They know you're one of my…best friends. They wouldn't hurt you." I felt my stomach knot, I slowly began to release her wrist. I mean of course I consider Madi one of my best friends, but I guess a part of me hoped she'd want something more than that. She wrapped her hand around mine squeezing tightly. I looked back up at her, a soft look in her eyes. "You mean a lot to me. They know that. They're just a little overprotective."

Her tongue gently ran along her bottom lip and I couldn't find myself looking anywhere else. "You mean a lot to me too," I whispered back. I took a step closer, but she immediately took a step back running her lower back into the door handle. She let out a light moan from the pain of the metal against her back. I quickly ran my hand behind her back pulling her slightly closer as I rubbed at the small of her back. "Are you okay?"

She simply nodded stepping out of grasp and placing her hand on the handle again. There was scared look in her eyes. Damn it. She doesn't like me. I was wrong. "I think we need to get you checked out." She flipped her hair in my face again as she pushed through the door making her way down the hallway, not once turning back to look at me.

I slowly made my way down the hall behind her. I really did blow it. She probably never wants to talk to me ever again. She probably thinks I'm like all the other guys, like Asher. Asher has been telling everyone that Madi was his next conquest and that she'd be his way through to the inside circle. He just wants to use her to get closer to the members of the council, specifically Raven Reyes. God, I hope she doesn't think I'm as bad as Asher.

As soon as I made it into medical I saw Jones lying on a bed in the corner of the room. I immediately rushed over taking a seat by his side. He greeted me with a weak smile, his hand shaking as he lifted it up to shake mine. I wrapped his hand with both of mine leaning forward as I rested my elbows on the edge of his bed. "How are you feeling? That asshole really did a number on you."

"I've been better. But the real question is, how are _you_?" He flashed me a lazy grin, his eyes flickering open and closed. I let go of his hand, replacing it with my forehead. Rubbing my temples, I squeezed my eyes shut. "That bad, huh?"

I turned my head back towards him, holding my face up with the palm of my hand. "Bad is an understatement," I scoffed. He looked back at me, a sad look in his eyes. "I thought she liked me, but now I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm no better than Asher."

He placed his hand on my forearm, his eyebrows drawn together forming a wrinkle between his eyebrows. "She'd be stupid to not like you." His tone was confident saying it as if it were a fact. He winked up at me, letting out a laugh. His hands immediately darted to his side, carefully wrapping around his wound. Letting out a deep sigh he placed his hands back on top of his stomach. "What happened?"

"We were alone in the stairwell, and I don't know what came over me. I just…I wanted to kiss her." A large smirk grew on his face as his hand fell back to his side. "But she didn't want to. She doesn't like me."

Jones flung his hand at my arm, lightly smacking me with the little energy he had. "You can't just kiss a girl like Madi. If she's anything like her parents she won't be easy, Luke." He tilted his head towards me, his eyes temporarily shutting releasing a deep sigh before they opened again. "She's not like these other girls, right? So, treat her like she's different. You've got to show her she's more than just your friend, but kissing her isn't the way to do that."

"Your friend is right." I quickly turned around to see Dr. Jackson standing tall behind me, a questioning look on his face. "Madi isn't just any girl and her family will have your head on a stick before you even get the chance to treat her like any other girl."

I cleared my throat standing up beside him. "Uh. No Dr. Jackson, it's not like that at all. I just…"

"You just have a crush on the one girl in this camp that could probably behead you herself." He let out a slight laugh, pulling the stethoscope from around his neck. He carefully placed the earpiece in his ears, holding the chest piece between his index finger and his thumb. "Breathe for me." I did as he said allowing him to take my vitals. "You're a good kid Luke. I've worked with you almost every day in the bunker. So, that's why I think I owe it to you to give you some advice." He took off the stethoscope placing it back around his neck. "If you like her there are better ways to impress her. Madi is different, you're right. So, kissing her won't impress her. Spar with her, knock her on her ass. Challenge her."

"Jackson is speaking from experience," Jones laughed. He nodded in the direction of Miller who was sitting in the corner of the room carefully watching Jackson as he worked. Jackson looked over flashing Miller a smile before turning back towards us. "But he's right. You can't expect her to just be up and open to liking you. She's got more important things to worry about. Be a man and give her a reason to think of you as something more than just her friend."

Jackson let out a heavy chuckle as he pulled a flashlight from his pocket. He flashed the flashlight in my eyes, spreading my eyelids apart with his fingers. "You've got a good friend here, Luke. You should listen to him" Jackson brought his hand to my wrist checking my heart rate once more. "Seems like there's nothing physically wrong with you. You can go back to your guard duties."

"Really? Do you want to go out and help me train the guard? Indra just radioed for some extra help." Madi made her way across the room, a large smile on her face. Miller walked up close behind her, his eyes narrowed down at me. From the looks of it she didn't hear anything, if she did she was really good at hiding it. "You can spar with me." Her tone was laced with excitement. She stood before me with her hands carefully placed behind her back, her eyes looking up at me through her long dark lashes.

"Didn't your dad send you up here to rest?" All her excitement faded away as she took in my response. "I mean I would love to spar with you, but I don't think you should disobey your dad." She pressed her lips into a hard line as she contemplated what to do. I could still feel Miller staring me down, but I kept my eyes focused on Madi. Miller and I had many interactions in the bunker, but now that he had taken over the duty of an uncle to Madi he had changed. I felt a sense of resentment from him. Maybe Jackson would talk to him though to clear things out.

"It's okay. There are more important things to be doing than to be sleeping. Come on." She grabbed my arm pulling me towards the door. I looked over my shoulder to see Jackson and Jones both flashing me large smiles. Miller followed closely behind us, his hands placed in his loose pant pockets. "I've got a few moves that I want to try out. They're more of hand to hand combat, but I think it can become useful if we ever need it." I couldn't help but gaze down at her as she began to rant about her new move and all of its great uses. She waved her hands in the air, a large smile plastered on her face.

After a few minutes, we made it outside, the sun was up and brighter than ever. I squinted my eyes as the rays hit my face. It was still going to take some time to get used to being back on the ground. I had barely gotten used to it the first time, but I guess things were different now. Madi quickly made her way to Indra's side, Echo and Miller standing close behind them.

Madi's face hardened as she stood in front of the crowd of new recruits. She was a totally different person when she was a leader, but I guess it was just a part of the status she held. You can't give too much away, or people would take advantage of you. She may be younger than me, but she's definitely wiser. She had the wisdom of all the members of the council, her family. She had it all and I couldn't be any luckier to be able to call her my best friend. Was all of this really worth losing the chance to be her friend? But it seems like she didn't even care about anything that had happened.

I couldn't hear a single word that Indra was saying. My eyes focused on Madi. She looked beautiful standing up there with her long dark hair hanging around her face, a wrinkle formed between her eyebrows, her plump pink lips pressed together. Her eyes ran along the crowd as she stood up beside Indra, her hands placed behind her back. It was only when everyone around me started moving that I had noticed Indra's speech was over.

Everyone split up into groups among Madi, Miller, Indra, and Echo. I made my way towards Madi's group, her group was filled with familiar faces. Asher, Glass, Bryan, Darcy, Glenn, Artigas, and Adria. They had all developed a clique. Just a bunch of people who thought they were better than everyone else.

Madi took a few knives out of her pockets and her boots throwing them on the ground behind her. She took a few steps closer, her head held high. "So, we're starting with hand-to-hand combat. This isn't about your strength, but rather how quickly you can think. Can I get someone to come help me with a little demonstration?"

Immediately Glass's flung into the air, a mocking smile on her face. Glass was the oldest of the group. She was one of the hundred that came down to Earth first, but from what I've heard she was of little use. She always relied on other people to help her, sleeping around to get what she wanted. But I guess things hadn't changed much. Glass made her way through the crowd weaving around everyone. I folded my arms moving to the side, but her hand still lingered on my shoulder as she passed me. I looked up to Madi, a hurt look in her eyes. She quickly shook it away once Glass made her way in front of Madi, her hands placed on her hips.

"Glass," Madi mumbled. Glass responded with a tight smile on her face. Madi squatted slightly lower, her hands balled into loose fists. She bounced her weight around as she stood in front of Glass. "Okay, now come at me." Glass came running at Madi, but Madi quickly turned her back towards Glass flipping her over her shoulder throwing her immediately against the floor. "You see. She came at me with too much aggression, but not enough thought. You can't just start off like that in a fight." Glass lied on the floor groaning from the pain.

Madi stretched her hand out to help Glass up, but Glass just slapped it out of her way as she continued to stand up. "You just caught me off guard." She regained her strength mimicking Madi's original stance. "How about you come at me?" Madi nodded once before charging forward her fists flying forward. Glass deflected her first few hits, but immediately Madi faked right to break left right into her side taking Glass by surprise. Glass took a few steps back trying to regain her strength, but Madi charged forward taking another hit to Glass's jaw.

Suddenly Asher stepped in pulling Glass away from Madi, his arms wrapped around her waist. "How about you demonstrate with someone who can actually fight back?" He pushed Glass back towards the group standing to their side. Madi stood in front of him contemplating what to do. "Oh, come on Princess. You scared of a little challenge?" He looked her up and down, a sly smirk on his face.

Her eyes narrowed down at Asher a look of pure anger in her eyes. "I'm not the one who should be scared." She took a step back falling back into her fighting stance. Asher began circling her, but Madi quietly stood in the middle waiting for his next move. Once Asher got behind her he charged forward wrapping his arm around her waist. He tried to pull her off the ground, but Madi swung all her weight all at once over his shoulder pulling him back. Her legs dangled in the air for a few seconds before she jumped back to her feet pushing Asher's face flat into the ground.

Asher groaned in pain. Laughter filled the air as everyone watched him roll back over onto his back, his entire face covered in dirt. "That the best you've got?" He jumped back up standing in front of Madi, almost instantly running back at her. His arm wrapped around her neck, but Madi was always one step ahead. She placed one hand on his forearm and one underneath his elbow, pushing his arm up above her head as she slid underneath. She pressed her arm back into his arm above his elbow immediately locking his arm. Asher leaned forward with his arm extended behind his back, his groans continuing. "Let me go," Graham yelled.

Madi released him pushing him into the ground as she did. "Confidence is good, but arrogance is ignorance," Madi laughed as she stared down at Graham, tight wrinkles forming in the corners of her eyes. "Don't ever underestimate your opponent. They may be smaller, but they may also be smarter."

"What makes you think you're so much better than us?" Glass stepped out of the crowd with her arms folded in front of her. Graham quickly stood up making his way to her side. "You think you're all big and bad because you have the council in the palm of your dainty little hands?" She began pushing Madi back, but Madi didn't react. Glass pressed to the tip of her finger into Madi's shoulder as her voice slowly began to rise. "You think that you scare any of us?"

I quickly made my way forward stepping between Glass and Madi. Glass took a step back almost surprised by the action. I folded my arms in front of me, glaring down at her. Glass was taken back, a slight misstep backward as I stood in front of her. But soon she began to glare back up at me. "Back off. Just because you're jealous of her doesn't mean you can talk to her like that."

Asher stepped in front of Glass a large smirk on his face. He stood only a few inches away from me, mimicking my position. "I should've known you'd come up to defend your little grounder girlfriend. What are you a grounder pounder now?" Glass and their small group of friends let out some laughter, but Asher remained silent with his eyes focused on me.

"How about you back off before I make you." He stepped closer his hands tightened into fists. I felt Madi's hand on my lower back, but even that wasn't enough to calm me down now. Asher had already given Madi such a hard time for not being one of us. Everyone was scared of him in the bunker because he had been training with the guard, but now things were different. I was different.

"Why would you want her anyways? She could give you radiation poisoning or something from all the time she's spent out here on Earth after Praimfaya. I'm sure her mother has it too. She probably already gave it to Bellamy." Glass peeked up at me over Asher's shoulders, but I kept my eyes focused on Asher. "I mean I'm just saying, you could do much better." Her tone was mocking and it only fueled my anger towards all of them. If Asher says another word I'll take a note from the book of Bellamy Blake, maybe I'll leave him tied to a tree for a few days.

Right as I opened my mouth to argue Madi stepped out from behind me her hand gliding along my lower back as she stepped forward pushing Asher into Glass. "Are you actually that stupid?"Asher and Glass both flew back, a scared look in their eyes as they regained themselves. "Are you mad because everyone your age is either dead or too good for you? Is that why you walk around here bullying everyone? Or are you mad because you're really just a burden to Wonkru with no actual contribution or talents?" Between every question, Madi took a step closer towards Glass, the fear growing in her eyes with each question. There was a silence amongst the group. Glass's jaw dropped wide open. "Or is the fact that you're obsessed with Bellamy, but he's too busy being in love with Clarke to give you the time of day?" Glass huffed quickly turning around and making her way back towards her group of friends.

"I suggest you leave too before I make you leave, Asher." I turned my head to see Bellamy standing a short distance away, his arms placed on his hips as he glared at Asher. Asher's eyes shot wide open as he stared at Bellamy. Instantly without another word he turned away making his way back to the crowd of people standing around watching everything unfold. "Everyone partner up and start sparring."

Immediately everyone did as he said. I looked back to Madi her eyes were focused on Bellamy who soon stepped closer to us. Madi tilted her head to the side rubbing the back of her neck. "I'm sorry. Glass and Asher just don't know when to stop, I…" Bellamy placed his hand on her shoulder slowly rubbing it as he stared down at her.

"It's okay, Princess. They're just trying to get under your skin." He looked back over at me, a proud look in his eyes. "Luke is right. They're jealous of you. Just don't let it get to you." Madi simply nodded, an awkwardness between us as she avoided looking at me. "And don't tell Clarke, we don't need her to get involved in this." Madi let out a laugh before turning back towards the group. Just as I began to turn and make my way behind her Bellamy placed a hand on my shoulder turning me back to face him. "Thank you."

I shifted my weight from one foot to the other. "For what?" There was almost a half smile on his face. There was a hint of gratitude in his voice and in his smile. He may have a reputation for being cold-hearted and ruthless, but it was clear he cared for Madi.

"For standing up for Madi. I know she can fight for herself, but it's nice to know she has someone else there for her when I'm not around. It's good to have…friends." He released my shoulder taking a step back. I held my hand out for him, he quickly took it giving me a strong squeeze. "But if you hurt her just know my reputation proceeds me for a reason." I awkwardly laughed, his hold on my hand growing a little too tight almost tight enough to cut off the circulation in my hand. But soon he released my hand, a fonder smile on his face.

"I would never, sir." He tightened his grip on my hand once more before releasing. This time there was a large smirk on his face, the same one Madi gave me when she took me down while we sparred.

"Now, let's see what you've got." He patted my shoulder taking a few steps away from me squatting down into the same stance Madi had stood. I quickly mimicked his stance, my adrenaline kicking in as we began to circle one another. I'm only about to spar with Bellamy Blake, guard leader, member of the council, all around badass killer. I'm sure it'll be fine.

He swung his fist at my face I deflected his first right hook, and like expected he swung a left hook. I tilted my head to the side grasping his wrist and pulling it across his chest. Once he was disabled I released his wrist swinging my fist into his jaw. He immediately looked up at me, a surprised look on his face as he stepped back. Once again, he began circling me his fists held up in front of his face to defend himself. He charged forward, but I mimicked Madi's move turning my back around and flipping him over my shoulder.

He let out a loud grunt as he hit the floor. He shook his dark, curly hair around before jumping back up. He quickly swung his arm forward, I dodged his fist but got nailed by his elbow. When I tried to regain my strength, he wrapped his arm tightly around my neck. I tried to recreate Madi's move, but he immediately flipped me on my back dropping to his knees beside me with his fist held above my jaw. He released his fist opening up his hand for me to take, pulling me back to my feet. "You're a good fighter." He patted my shoulder. "Keep fighting like that and you'll be an official member of the guard soon."

"Thank you, sir." He nodded, flashing me a smile before walking away. I let out a breath I hadn't noticed I was holding. Did I just earn the respect of Bellamy Blake? I smiled to myself before turning back towards the group.

I looked around scanning the crowd until my eyes fell on Madi. She was standing at the outer edge of the crowd watching people fight. Her eyes squinted as she focused on the people in front of her going at it. Occasionally she yelled out some advice, but for the most part, she remained quiet. Jones is right, if I want to impress her I'll have to be different too.

 **Clarke:**

I woke up in a daze my arm reaching out to my side only to feel an empty bed. I stretched out my limbs letting out a deep sigh. A few hours of sleep were much needed. These past few days had been stressful, but at least now with Bishop out of the way, things could go back to normal. We could focus on the important things like preparing for winter.

Closing my eyes, I lied my head back. We needed to get enough food to last through winter, train the guard so we could keep the order of Wonkru, and build enough cabins for people to be able to live outside of the ship. There were so many things that needed to be done, but not enough time. Winter would come soon, and we weren't at all ready. We'd already wasted enough time with all the prisoners. At least now the executions had begun, and I could be uninvolved. Now I just want them all gone. I'm grateful to have the chance to step back and let everyone else handle things for a change, but a part of me feels wrong not doing anything.

I ran my hand over my leg lightly massaging my knee. Thankfully Bellamy had elevated my leg before leaving because the swelling was starting to become too much. I'd be stuck in a wheelchair for at least a few months, but this was already becoming too much. Having to rely on everyone around me to do even the simplest of things.

Grabbing my leg, I threw it over the edge of the bed struggling to sit up. Suddenly the door opened, Bellamy rushed to my side to help me. "Wait." He held my heel in the palm of his hand elevating my leg as he reached to grab my pants. "You know you could've just radioed me if you needed me."

"I can handle myself." He carefully slid my pants up my leg. Once my pants were on he held his arm out giving me support to stand up and make my way towards my wheelchair. Bellamy understands how hard this all is for me. At least he gives me the chance to do some things for myself. "Where have you been?"

"I was helping with the finishing touches on our first cabin." His lips curled into a tight smile, dimples forming at the corners of his mouth. At least with the first cabin being made people would work harder. I know Bellamy took great pride in helping put together the cabins. "And I'm happy to say we get the first cabin. We don't have to stay locked up in this ship anymore."

"Shouldn't we give the first cabin to a family?" He looked over his shoulder as he searched the drawers, a questioning eyebrow raised at me. "I mean at least someone who can appreciate being outside because right now I don't think I can really do that." I gestured to my leg earning a light chuckle from Bellamy.

Bellamy turned around placing a kiss on my lips. "We _are_ a family and you _can_ appreciate it." He placed a radio and a tablet in my lap. "I'll have everyone move our stuff after lunch, but for now let's go get something to eat." He began to push my wheelchair out of the door making our way down the hall.

"I think it's time we tell everyone. We could all use some good news." I ran my fingers along my ring, a smile growing on my face. I tilted my head to this side to see a large smile on Bellamy's face as he continued pushing me down the hallway. "Some moonshine and some lunch sounds like the perfect way to do it."

Bellamy suddenly stopped pulling a large bottle from his backpack and placing it into my lap. I opened the cap smelling the top of the bottle, the toxic fumes clouded my nose immediately. "Already one step ahead of you." I grabbed the backpack from his hands holding it tightly against my chest as I took a swig of the moonshine. The burning sensation ran down my throat giving me chills throughout my body. "Easy Princess. You need to get eat some food first."

I rolled my eyes taking another sip from the bottle before screwing the cap back on. "I just want to know what Octavia wins since she won their bet." I tilted my head back against Bellamy's stomach looking up at him taking in his square jaw, the dimple in his chin, and his luscious dark hair dangling around his face. "Apparently she won their bet."

He let out a chuckle before stopping in front of the medical wing's doors, his eyes falling down to meet mine. "Of course she did." He flashed me a smirk before opening the door to medical for us.

He pushed me through the door leading me straight to Octavia's room. I placed my hand over the ring as we made our way in. The room was filled. Octavia sat up in her bed with Azuma and Indra sitting close beside her. Raven sat with Madi at the foot of Octavia's bed with some food spread out for all of them to share. My mom and Kane pulled up two chairs by the side of Octavia's side, both of them having a conversation about execution tactics. Murphy sat with his hand placed on Emori's thigh as she sat in his lap, the couple was deep in a conversation. Jackson and Miller were sitting in a few chairs in the corner of the room welcoming smiles on both of their faces as they acknowledged our presence. Monty and Harper walked up behind us with large bottles in their hands and more food. Once everyone else noticed us there was a large exchange of greetings and smiles.

"So, what are we celebrating?" Miller questioned as he poured some moonshine into some cups for everyone. "Are we celebrating that we're finally done with Bishop's crap? Because I definitely think that's something to toast to."

"I second that," Murphy chimed in bumping his cup against Miller's as they both took large swigs of their drinks.

Suddenly the door opened again, Alexandra carefully stood in the doorway with her hands held in front of her. Her eyes ran around the room but then fell back to the floor. A silence fell around the room. Raven cleared her throat giving everyone a threatening look. "I invited her." Everyone stared at her wide-eyed, but Raven ignored them as she stood up to pull up a chair for Alexandra. "I know she's done a lot of bad things, but which one of us hasn't? I think she deserves a chance. A real one."

Miller held out an extra cup handing it to Alexandra as she took a seat beside Raven. "I agree." He flashed Raven a wink earning an eye roll in return. Did I miss something while I was down? I watched Raven and Alexandra exchange smiles, but it made it more transparent. Good for Raven. At least now I don't have to worry about Alexandra being obsessed with Bellamy. "Now tell us why you called us all here for lunch? Some of us could have been getting laid." He nodded his head in Raven's direction. Raven chucked a pillow at Miller's face.

Bellamy cleared his throat as he stood beside me, one hand gripped around his cup and another placed on my shoulder. "We're here to celebrate a lot of things. We're celebrating that we're all together. We're celebrating that we're all alive. We're celebrating that Bishop is gone and we can move on." Everyone let out a few cheers, raising their cups in the air. "We're also celebrating new beginnings. New relationships. New opportunities. And new challenges." Bellamy's eyes shifted down to meet mine, a large smile on his face.

"Sorry Alexandra, but we may have lied. We're not actually married yet." Alexandra stared at us, slightly confused. But everyone else exchanged a shocked look as the realization hit them. Smiles and laughter filled the room. I held my hand out flashing the ring so everyone could see. "We don't actually want a wedding, but Octavia may or may not have threatened to kill me if we didn't have one so I guess that's what we'll spend all winter doing."

Cheers filled the air as everyone began to stand up. Murphy, Monty, and Miller immediately made their way towards Bellamy large smiles on their faces as they hugged him and hit him angry because he hadn't told them. Emori made her way towards me, a large smile on her face as she pulled me into an embrace. "Clarke, I'm happy for the both of you." She laughed holding me by my shoulders. "About time you two got it together."

She stepped out of the way leaving room for Raven. Raven stepped forward hitting me on the shoulder. "I'm so mad at you." I stared at her in confusion, but before I could respond she pulled me into a hug. "If you would have lost your memory because of me then we would have never known that you two finally decided to get your act together." She pulled away placing her hands on her hips, a large smile on face. "Not that you two weren't basically married before."

"Just because we were co-leaders doesn't mean we were married." I rolled my eyes leaning my weight onto my elbow.

"You two have definitely been an old married couple since we hit the ground," Monty laughed as he stood beside Raven. "That's why Jasper called you guys mom and dad when you weren't around." He weakly laughed staring down up at the ceiling once before looking back down at me. He pulled me into a tight hug placing a kiss on the top of my head. "I'm happy for you two."

"I guess Octavia won the bet." Miller shrugged his shoulder staring over at Octavia before turning back and giving me a hug. "But since not all parties are here I think we should just forget that even happened." He rubbed the back of his neck, hanging his head low as he stared down at me.

Monty held up his cup in the air. "Even though Jasper isn't here I'm sure he'd be ecstatic. Let's make this toast out to Jasper. May we meet again." A single tear slipped down Monty's cheek. Harper made her way under his arm, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"May we meet again." Everyone chanted in unison.

Murphy grabbed Emori's hand pulling her up off the cot at the other end of the room and guiding her towards the rest of the group. He cleared his throat pulling everyone's attention towards him. Clearly a tactic he'd picked up from Octavia. "I'm happy for you two. I honestly didn't think you had it in you." Everyone laughed in unison, Miller hit Bellamy in the chest. Murphy grabbed Emori's hand with one hand and raised his cup with the other. "I've got another thing to toast to." Everyone raised their cup in unison mimicking Murphy's action. Murphy's arm protectively wrapped around Emori's stomach. "A toast to the next member of Wonkru." He kissed Emori's cheek, a large smile on both of their faces.

A shock blew through the room, the silence quickly ended when Madi jumped up wrapping Emori in a tight hug. Loud cheers and hug exchanged once again as everyone rejoiced. I tilted my head toward Raven, she'd told me about what had happened between her and Murphy. But by the looks of it, everything was okay. She was deep into a conversation with Alexandra, her hand placed on her shoulder as she laughed. It was nice to see her happy again. Since Finn, she'd never really moved on. He'd played such a big part of her life she never really allowed herself to be happy again.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Turning around I saw my mom standing beside me with a large smile on her face. She kneeled in front of me placing her hand on my knee for balance. "Clarke, I'm so happy for you." She cupped my face in the palm of her hand. I leaned my face into her hand temporarily closing my eyes. "I always knew that one-day Bellamy would take care of you and give you all the happiness you deserved. I'm glad you're finally allowing yourself to be happy too."

I placed my hand on my mom's hand holding it against my face. "I'm glad you're happy too." I tilted my head towards Kane who was standing in front of Bellamy with his hand placed on his shoulder. Large smiles on both of their faces. She stood up pressing a kiss to my head before making her way to Bellamy.

Looking around the room everyone seemed happy, genuine smiles on their faces. It's the first time in a long time we'd really gotten the chance to really be happy. Our lunch didn't last long when Bellamy, Miller, Murphy had to leave because some idiots dropped a tree on some kid named Asher's foot. My mom and Jackson rushed out with them followed by a few apprentices and a gurney. Kane, Harper, Indra, and Madi headed back to training the guard. Monty got so drunk that Azuma had to carry him to his room. Raven and Alexandra slipped away without a word, but they didn't need to say anything for us to know. Things were looking up for us. We'd heal soon.


	42. Chapter 42

New Beginnings

Alexandra:

From what I've picked up on these past few days Bishop was being executed, soon. I felt wrong for being so happy about it, but he deserved it. After all the crap he gave my family for the way we lead our people, he was eternally the one to let things fall apart. He executed anyone who got sick unless they were one of his own, executed anyone who disagreed with him, he even executed his wife when she wanted to expose him to the rest of our people. He murdered his wife and lied to his kids about it. Bishop is going to have a special place in hell. Maybe I will too for playing a part in all of his destruction.

"You know everyone else took a break, you should take one too," Dr. Jackson took a seat across from me. He began sorting through some of the materials. I nodded as I continued to sort through different types of forceps throwing them into their labeled bins. "I know none of this is easy for you."

"It's not supposed to be." His eyes shot up, a sad look crossing his face. I dropped my eyes back to forceps in my hand. "I was one of them. I helped with everything that happened to your people. It only makes sense to face some hostility. Maybe I deserve it." There was a sense of coldness in my voice, but it's not like it wasn't true. I let everything happen. I could have stood up for them, but I didn't. I could have helped them against Bishop, but I didn't. At least not enough to significantly change anything. I'm weak and this is my punishment for being weak.

" _Our_ people. You're one of us now. Where you came from doesn't define you. Who you choose to be is." I looked over my shoulder to see Raven making her way towards the table, her eyes not once leaving mine as she took a seat beside Jackson. "We've all done things we regret, but that doesn't mean anyone should hold it against you."

"You don't understand. I saw you when you were a prisoner. I watched you. Monitored you." Raven's eyebrows knit together, and I could see her face shift, but her eyes were still focused on mine. "That little scar on your shoulder is because of me. I did that." She lifted her sleeve up, running her fingers along the scar a confused look on her face. "We knocked you out and did an exploratory procedure to get to know how different you all were from us."

"I looked into your background. You're a doctor, but your family was made up of many generations of leaders. You didn't have easy. Bishop murdered all of your family except for you. But he also murdered the love of your life." I felt my tears build up as the memories flew back. I had tried for years to forget it, but I couldn't. Fighting the tears, I kept my eyes on Raven, a sad look in her eyes. "You had no one left. You did what you could to survive. No one should blame you for that."

"You're not alone anymore Alexandra." Jackson reached his hand out across the table, a weak smile on his face. A tear slipped down my cheek as I took it, a warm feeling blowing through my chest.

"Jackson. Can I get your help over here?" I looked over my shoulder to see Miller standing in the doorway with a large smile on his face. He nodded his head towards the hallways. Quickly Jackson stood up making his way towards Miller. "We'll be a while so if you need anything ask Abby." Miller flashed Raven a smile before turning towards the hallways behind Jackson.

Raven let out a light laugh before turning her attention back to me. "Look I don't want you to feel like you have to tell me anything, but if you want to I'll be here." She looked me up and down before focusing her attention back to the materials in front of her.

"I've had a rough past, but it's nothing I'd want to burden you with." Her eyes shot up to me, an angry look in her eyes. God, I hope I didn't offend the one person that actually wants to talk to me.

I was mentally kicking myself until she leaned forward to grab my hand. "Your past is a part of you and I want to know all about it. But only if you'll let me." I felt the blood rush to my face, my cheeks probably turning a faint shade of pink. "Besides. I'm pretty sure I've got you beat for terrible pasts." She burst into laughter. Her cheeks grew tighter forming soft dimples on each side of her face, her eyes squinted together as her mouth slightly opened the beautiful sound of her laughing slipping through her lips.

Raven was so much more different than everyone else. She wasn't afraid to say what she felt. She was clearly strong but didn't feel the need to constantly act like it. Even with her hair loosely dangling from her face and her torn clothes she was beautiful. I shook the thought from my head quickly. She's barely my friend let alone anything else. I barely know her. I can't. I won't.

"What is your past like?" The words slipped out of my mouth before I could even think to stop myself. In my head, I was beating my fist against my forehead, but all I could manage to do was awkwardly smile at her as she stared at me with a raised eyebrow. She's going to hate me. I've ruined my one real friendship. That's it.

She cleared her throat pulling me from my messy thoughts. "Honestly, I wouldn't even know where to start." She looked around the room contemplating her whole life. A confused look on her face. The same expression she made when she was focused. Her eyebrows closely drew together, she licked her bottom lip, her eyes darted around everywhere except for the thing she needed to focus on.

"Start from where it all began. Your family. Where did you live? What was it like?" I saw the light leave her eyes as the memories hit her. Maybe I wasn't the only one with a painful past. I clasped my hands in front of me carefully watching her as she pushed some stray hairs behind her ear.

"I grew up in space on the Ark. I don't know who my father was, but my mom. Well, she wasn't around much so I usually spent most of my time with this boy who lived next door to me, Finn." Her eyes began to tear, but she pushed them away regaining her strength before continuing. "My mom used to trade my rations for moonshine, so Finn was the one who really took care of me. He shared his rations with me, he celebrated my birthday with me, he helped me become a mechanic." She paused letting out a deep sigh. "He was my best friend. He was the love of my life." Was? Maybe we weren't so different. She's been through this, that's why she doesn't want me to go through this alone. "I may not have had my real father, but I had Sinclair. He was the closest thing to a father that I've ever had. He was my mentor when I worked as a Zero-G mechanic. He was there for me when Finn couldn't be." Raven flashed me a smile, letting out a weak laugh as a tear slipped down her cheek. "I told you I had you beat."

I leaned my elbow up on the table, holding my chin up in the palm of my hand. "I guess you didn't have it any easier than I did." She stands up looking through the bins, slowly making her way around to my side of the table.

"But I had people who fought for me. People who cared about me." Her voice became lower, huskier. She continued making her way towards me, her fingers running along the edge of the table until she stops in front of me. "You should know that you do too." She took a seat in front of me. Her eyes were captivating, I couldn't tear myself away. She placed her hand on my knee, I found myself leaning closer to her. Closer and closer until the door swung open. Everyone making their way back inside from their break. Raven quickly took her hand off my knee, sitting back up properly. She kept a safe distance as she stared at me. "We're all having lunch in Octavia's room later. You should join us." Before I could respond she raised her hand in the air to stop me. "It's not a question, so I won't take no for an answer. You're coming."

She quickly stood up turning towards the door, her long ponytail swung behind her. Right before she made it out the door she looked at her shoulder flashing me a smile. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. Maybe everything would work itself out. All I want to do is move on. I want to be a better person. Be a better me.

Luke:

Sitting in the middle of a table filled with people and I still felt empty. I guess that's how I felt when Madi wasn't around. I always catch myself looking for her or waiting for her, even when I knew she wouldn't be coming around. I really need to shake this feeling, it's too much too soon. I took a bite out of my bread focusing my attention back to everyone around me.

The table was filled with some of my closest friends Amrit, Alyssa, Chelsea, Noah, Darcy, Bret, and Christine. The only two people missing was Madi and Jones. Everyone aside from Madi had spent a lot of time in the bunker together. I'd worked in medical with Alyssa, Chelsea, and Noah. But Jones and I had grown up together on the Ark, as a member of the guard he'd introduced me to Amrit, Noah, Darcy, Bret, and Christine. We were almost all orphans, except for Amrit. Amrit still had his father since he was a top-notch engineer. I guess it just gave us another reason to be there for each other.

Amrit and Alyssa were having the fight they always when they played their stupid game of who would win a fight. "If Bellamy got into a fight with Azuma, Azuma would kill him. He's a grounder. He's better at hand to hand combat," Amrit argued.

"Are you kidding? Azuma was a healer before he joined the guard. He's nowhere near a good fighter as Bellamy. Bellamy led the guard and the delinquents. He kicked a lot of grounder ass." Alyssa's tone was mocking as she hit Amrit in the arm. She was always biased when it came to an argument about Bellamy. She was his biggest fan.

"Alyssa, we all know you're just saying that because you're obsessed and want to be just like him. The real question is Wanheda or Skairipa?" Chelsea interrupted, her eyebrows raised in curiosity. Our lunches usually consisted of silly arguments and delinquent stories. In the bunker all anyone ever talked about was what life was like before. The delinquents were legendary to the Grounders, they were the first people to come down and actually pose a threat. They had a scarier reputation than the Mountain Men.

"We all know that Wanheda would take the commander down. She's not the commander of death for nothing." Amrit sat up with a smug smile on his face.

"Octavia is the commander, I'm pretty sure she would annihilate Wanheda any day." Alyssa rolled her eyes taking a bite out of the meat in her hands.

"I think it would be a tie." Everyone's eyes shot to me, a look of surprise across all of their faces. "Clarke is a smart fighter, she could probably get away with a lot of blows that no one would think of doing. But Octavia is an aggressive fighter she could overpower Clarke if given the chance. So, it's all a matter of chance. Whether Clarke gets the chance to be smart or whether Octavia gets to be aggressive. Either way, it wouldn't end well."

"How do you know so much about how they fight? I thought you didn't care?" Alyssa nudged my side giving me a sly smirk. I rolled my eyes taking another bite out of some bread. "Don't blush Luke we all know you like Madi."

"Leave the poor guy alone. He's probably already been losing a lot of sleep over it," Noah laughed wrapping his arm around Chelsea pressing a kiss to her head. "I know I used to." Chelsea rolled her eyes, flashing Noah an annoyed look. Everyone had someone. Noah had Chelsea, Amrit had Alyssa, Darcy had Christine, and Bret had Jones.

"Don't worry man, she'll come around. Just give it time." Bret patted my shoulder as he stood up. "I've got to go check on Garrett. I'll catch you guys outside. We're working a construction shift together, right?"

"All of us except for Alyssa and Chelsea," Noah replied. Bret nodded heading out of the hall. "He's right, Luke. You've only really known her for a few weeks, girls take forever to decide whether they like you or not."

Chelsea flung her hand towards Noah's chest, but he caught it wrapping his hand tightly around hers. "We do not. You just need to be a little clearer that you like her. Sometimes we just don't know and we're too scared to tell you ourselves." Noah pulled her hand to his lips placing soft kisses on her fingers. "Why don't you take her somewhere to talk? Somewhere nice?"

"And risk Bellamy Blake finding out? Or even worse, Clarke Griffin? I think you should just let Madi make the moves," Darcy folded her hands in front of her looking back and forth from Chelsea's face to mine. She's right. I need to talk to her, but if Bellamy or Clarke find out things could go South.

"How about you sneak her out, take a radio, and if I hear that anyone's looking for you two I'll radio you?" Noah sat up pulling a radio from his waistband and sliding it across the table in my direction. "If you really want her, you'll have to take some risks."

"Risking his whole life just to know if she likes him? Are you actually that dumb Luke?" Darcy threw her hands in the air, her eyes wide as she stared up at me.

I reached across the table grabbing the radio. "I guess I am." Taking the radio off the table I pinned it to my waistband. "What makes you so sure that I won't just embarrass myself?"

"Because I see the way she looks at you." Christine's voice carried confidence. A soft smile on her face. Christine was usually quiet, kept her opinions to herself. She only inserted her wisdom where she felt it was necessary. "If she isn't into you then I'll take a turn being one of her punching bags when we're training."

I rolled my eyes scanning the room to catch Madi walking in with a large empty basket in her hand, her long dark hair flowing behind her as she rushed into the room. She always walked with purpose. She set down the basket in the corner of the room when some grounder kid walked up to her, his arm wrapping around her waist. She slipped out of his grasp, flipping her hair in his face as she walked away but that didn't stop him. He grabbed her hand pulling her into his chest, his other hand coming around to wrap around her waist again. Leaning down he whispered something in her ear. She struggled against his grasp. I quickly stood up making my way across the room. Madi may not want to do anything drastic, but I sure will. Who does he think he is? He can't just grab her like that. I won't let him. Before I got the chance to do anything Madi kneed him in the groin slipping out of his arms and slipping into the backdoor.

I quickly ran after her. I could see she was angry by the way she was walking with her hands balled into tight fists, her breathing heavy as she rushed to another door. Before she could break through I grabbed her wrist turning her towards me and pressing her back against the wall. Her eyes widened before I could see her entire body release its tension, her breathing becoming evener. "I'll kill him if you want."

She burst into laughter, a large smile on her face. "If one of us was going to kill him, it'd be me." She cupped my cheek in the palm of her hand, a shock of electricity shooting through my body. Her eyes slipped down to my lips but found their way back to my eyes. "Isn't it time for you to start your construction shift?"

I placed my hand on top of hers, pressing her palm against my cheek. Her tongue ran along her bottom lip as she stared at her hand. "Actually, I was going to ask you if you wanted to sneak away to that lake you told me so many stories about."

Her cheeks grew pink as she pressed her lips into a hard line, dropping her hand from my cheek. A groan almost slipped from my mouth at the loss of the contact. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "I'd like that." Before I could say another word, she grabbed my arm tugging me towards the door running past Emori on our way out. "You never saw us Emori," she yelled as she ran out the door.

Once we got into the hallway I stopped, pulling her slightly back to look at me. "Wait." She tilted her head to the side, a confused look on her face. "I just need to radio Noah that we're leaving. He said he'll tell us if anyone is looking for us."

She rolled her eyes taking the radio from my waistband and placing it on her own. "Don't worry. If anything happens I'll take care of it." She grabbed my hand interlocking her fingers with mine as she led me to the back of the ship. I shook my head following her around like a lost child. Madi spent her free time exploring unlike the rest of us who decided to spend our free time sleeping or playing stupid games.

She pulled me into a dark closet with barely enough room for one of us. We stood chest to chest, her hand still wrapped around mine. It was dark, but I could still see her piercing green eyes. "What are we..." She shut me up by putting her other hand to my mouth. I turned my head to the door once I heard indistinct voices coming from outside.

She leaned up placing her chin on my shoulder, her lips inches away from my ear. "Quiet or we'll get caught," she whispered. All the hair on the back of my neck stood up. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. I'm almost sure she could hear it. She leaned her head back down placing it on my chest as she carefully placed her hand against my chest. Every ounce of my being felt like it was being set on fire. The proximity was much more than I could handle right now. "Okay, I think we're good."

She slowly opened the door peeking her head through the crack of the door. Once she decided the coast was clear she slipped out pulling me close behind her. Following her, I was still working on catching my breath. She led me into a dark, empty room. Once we got into the room she dropped my hand. "Madi, where are we going?"

She silently walked to the corner of the room, taking a knee. Looking over her shoulder she held her hand out. "Do you trust me?" I stepped forward taking her hand. She smiled up at me before turning to open a secret panel. "Good. Now let's go." She let go of my hand climbing down a ladder to the bottom of the ship. Once she got down I made my way down after her. "I found this trap door once when I couldn't sleep. It leads us right out back."

"Why couldn't we just sneak out the front?" She twisted her face as she stared at me. Rolling her eyes, she opened up the back panel revealing a long line of trees.

"Going out the front would be too obvious." She jumped out the back holding her hand out in front of me. "Besides this is way more fun." I jumped out the back setting the door back into place before taking her hand to let her lead me the way. Now she had slowed down, walking by my side and embracing every moment.

"Do you miss living out here?" She inhaled deeply turning to look at me like she could see right through me.

"Sometimes. But Bellamy is moving us all into the first cabin today, so it'll be okay." She turned back towards the forest, her eyes carefully scanning the area as we walked together. "Who are you going to share a cabin with?"

She looked around everywhere, avoiding my gaze. I could see a hint of pink growing in her cheeks. "I don't know yet. I know Amrit and Alyssa are moving in together. So is Bret and Jones. I think Noah and Chelsea want to too. Darcy and Christine already live together so once some cabins become available I'm sure they will stay that way. I don't think I'll be getting a cabin anytime soon." I hadn't really considered that I would be the only person from our group that wouldn't be able to move into a cabin. But I guess it wasn't a big deal. Living on the ship wouldn't be so bad.

"Unmarried couples are required to share their cabins until we have enough for everyone." She looked up at me through her lashes. "I wouldn't lose hope so easily." She squeezed my hand pulling me a little faster through the trees. The sound of water slowly hitting the rocks grew louder the closer we got to the edge. "We're almost there." The fresh smell of pine mixed with flowers surrounded us. The sight of a deep blue lake and Madi was enough to take my breath away. She stood in front of me with her hands clasped beneath her chin, admiring the beauty of the water. "It's amazing, isn't it? You know in the summer I used to come here. I taught myself how to swim." The excitement in her voice was refreshing. "Maybe we can come back over summer and I can teach you how to swim." She looked over her shoulder at me, a large smile on her face.

"I would love that." I walked to the rocky edge of the lake, taking a seat on a large rock beside it. Madi wondered around aimlessly with a large stick in her hand and an even larger smile on her face. At least me attempting to kiss her didn't scare her off. But seeing her out here, so vulnerable, I wouldn't mind if we were just friends. Even if we were just friends it would still be comforting to know she was only like this with me.

"Why'd you want to come out here today?" Her voice was low as she made her way to a rock by my side. Maybe a little closer than I'd hope to be when having a conversation like this. I felt my nerves ringing in my body, but that came to an end when she placed her hand on my knee. "Is everything okay?"

"Of course. Yeah. Everything's fine." Her eyes narrowed up at me, a confused look on her face. She leaned forward propping elbow up on her knee. "I just wanted to talk." God, why is this so hard? Why can't I just tell her how I feel? Maybe Christine is wrong. Maybe she doesn't like me. But why would that matter? There's plenty of other girls in Wonkru. Girls that have thrown themselves at me. But they're nothing compared to Madi. I don't want just any girl, I want Madi.

Madi gave my knee a squeeze before pulling her hand back into her lap. "What do you want to talk about?" Her eyes shifted around looking at the water. Her voice was barely audible. Was she as nervous as I am?

I shifted slightly closer. She immediately sat up straight, her eyes slowly moving up to mine. I grabbed her wrist placing her hand in mine, but I kept one hand wrapped around her wrist feeling her pulse underneath my fingertips. I could feel her heart racing as I held her hand. "Madi, I haven't known you for that long but that doesn't matter. You've done more for me in these past few weeks than almost anyone has done for me my whole life. I just. I want..."

I was interrupted when she leaned forward, wrapping her hand around my cheek and pressing her soft lips into mine. She almost immediately pulled away shaking her hand and standing up. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..." I grabbed her wrist pulling her back down beside me.

"It's a good thing you did because I probably never would have tried to kiss you like that." I pushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She turned away trying to hide the pink in her cheeks, her lips pressing together. I turned her chin back towards me, cupping her cheek small cheeks in the palm of my hand and running my thumb along the outer edge of her mouth. "You have no idea how relieved I am to know you feel the same way."

"Me? I thought you didn't feel the same way." Her eyes widened as she stared at me, her mouth slightly open in surprise.

"What do you mean you didn't think I felt the same way? I was the one who tried to kiss you first." She nervously bit down on her lip, her eyes falling on her hands in her lap.

"I thought it was all just in my head. I didn't think you actually wanted to kiss me. I mean why would you?" She paused to look up at me letting out a deep sigh. "You're smart, talented, caring. You're different. Everyone looks up to you." She swallowed the lump in her throat before placing her hand on mine. "I look up to you." I scoffed at the thought. I'd spent all this time thinking I wasn't good enough for her, but to her, it was completely different. "You're not like any of the guys from Wonkru. With you, I've never felt like I didn't belong."

"Madi. Do you have any idea how intimidating you are? Do you have any idea that everyone wants to be like you? That I want to be like you." There was a gleam in her eyes as she stared at me, a large smile growing on her face. "You've lived on the ground and fended for yourself with no one but Clarke there to help you. You fight better than grown members of the guard. You've saved my life." I was almost angry with how naïve she was to everything around her. How could she not see that she was so much better than all of us? "You feel like you don't belong because you stand out. But everyone admires you for that exact same reason."

She wrapped her arms around my neck tightly burying her face into my neck. I could feel her heavy breathing against my neck and warm tears seeping through my shirt. But I just held her in my arms, embracing this moment. I wrapped one arm tightly around her waist and another behind her head, my fingers running through her tangled hair. After a few minutes, she pulled away pressing a kiss to my cheek before leaning back. "I think we should keep this to ourselves for a while. At least until I get the chance to talk to my mom." I felt a chill go down my spine at the thought. I've heard stories of Clarke in the bunker and how she would do anything to protect those she loved. "Don't worry. She may be the commander of death, but she's my mom first. She just wants what's best for me." It was like Madi could read my mind. She placed her hand on my knee leaning a little closer. "You're best for me."

I leaned closer pressing a chaste kiss to her lips. "I trust you."

She leaned back in, but the radio cracked between us. "Time to get back here, Romeo. Bellamy Blake is looking for his daughter," Noah laughed. His voice was teasing.

I quickly stood up grabbing Madi's hand and pulling her towards the tree line. "Time to go. Can't have your dad wanting to kill me." She laughed following closely behind me, her hand tightly locked on mine.

It was much more relaxing knowing that the feelings were mutual. That she had been thinking about me the same way. Now it was just up to her where things would go next. I may not be able to scream it from the tops of the trees that she was mine, but just knowing that I was hers was enough.

Raven:

Walking into Octavia's room I was attacked by Madi who's arms came and wrapped tightly around my waist. I leaned down pressing a kiss to the top of her head. The room was almost full. Jackson and Miller were cuddled up in the corner of the room. Murphy and Emori were deep into a conversation that looked kind of serious. Octavia was lying back in her bed listening to Azuma as he updated her on everything going on outside.

"I'm surprised you two are even here. I was almost sure you had _better_ things to be doing," I teased Miller. Jackson smirked up at me before raising his eyebrows at Miller.

"Likewise, Reyes. Don't you have something better to do? Or should I say, someone?" He burst into laughter placing a hand on Jackson's knee for support. Jackson stared up at me with a completely confused look on his face.

"Bite me, Miller." I rolled my eyes turning back towards Octavia.

She stared up at me with a typical Blake smirk on her face. "Is Raven Reyes finally getting laid?" She pressed her hands by her side to push herself up, Azuma quietly stood up to help her sit up.

"I'm _not_ getting laid," I bit back. "Can't a girl just be nice to someone because they're going through a hard time?"

"A girl can, but you aren't just any girl Reyes." There was a lace of sarcasm in Miller's voice. I turned around to flash Miller a glare before turning back towards Octavia. She raised a questioning eyebrow at me but didn't bother saying another word.

I took a seat at the foot of her bed beside Madi letting my legs hang off the edge. "Why did Bellamy call us all together for lunch anyway?"

The door opened, Abby and Kane walking in side by side with Indra following close behind them. "Something about a celebration."

Murphy scoffed from behind me and I could see him rolling his eyes without having to turn around. "Celebrating not dying." Typical Murphy. Always here to add an unwanted dark humor.

Abby and Kane pulled up chairs beside Octavia's bed. Indra made her way to the corner behind Azuma. "How are you feeling Octavia? Any significant pain in your pelvis?" Abby leaned forward pressing her fingers into Octavia's hip.

"When do you think she'll be back out there?" Azuma placed a hand on Octavia's forearm as he stared at Abby. He'd been taking care of Octavia for the past few days. When he's not working he's in here making sure she's okay and sleeping in that uncomfortable chair by her side.

"I think she should be good enough to take a trip outside in a few days. Your people really need to hear from you." Abby tucked the blanket back underneath Octavia's side.

"But they can wait until you're better. We've got everything under control for now," Azuma reassured her. Indra placed a proud hand on Azuma's shoulder nodding in agreement to Octavia. "Madi was training the guard this morning and I saw her take down a guy twice her size." He flashed Madi a soft smile earning a laugh out Madi.

"That's my girl. Who were you up against?" Octavia sat up a little further, squaring her shoulders as she aimed her attention towards Madi.

"Asher." Madi rolled her eyes as she mumbled his name.

Octavia leaned forward holding her hand up for Madi to high five. "Good that little asshole deserves it." Everyone burst into laughter. I wrapped my arm around Madi giving her a soft squeeze. I may not be her real aunt, but I don't care she is my niece and I'll fight anyone who says otherwise. I was proud to be her family.

I stood up picking up some food from a basket lying on the counter in the corner of the room and laying it out in front of Octavia. We can't just sit around here starving ourselves while waiting for them to come join us. I set out a small cloth over Octavia's legs, placing bread and meat in front of her.

"So, what are we celebrating?" I turned around to see Clarke sitting near the door with Bellamy standing close behind her. Monty and Harper were quickly unpacking their bags and placing a few bottles of moonshine on the bed. Miller picked up a bottle and began pouring it into cups while Jackson handed them around the room. "Are we celebrating that we're finally done with Bishop's crap? Because I definitely think that's something to toast to."

"I second that." Murphy and Miller flashed each other smirks before bumping their cups into one another and taking large sips of their moonshine.

Everyone's here except for Alexandra. I told her she had to come, but that doesn't mean she wouldn't stand me up. I really hope she comes, that way I can show her that we want her to be one of us. I want her to feel like she's one of us.

The door swung open, Alexandra stood in the doorway. She scanned the room with her cold blue eyes, her hair carefully falling around her face. Everyone around the room began exchanging awkward looks. The silence consuming the room. I cleared my throat standing up and pulling a chair out for Alexandra. "I invited her." There was a shocked look on almost everyone's face. Everyone except for Clarke. She simply nodded at me giving me the reassurance I needed. "I know she's done a lot of bad things, but which one of us hasn't? I think she deserves a chance. A real one."

Alexandra's face lit up as she entered. Miller made his way towards her handing her a cup of moonshine. "I agree." Alexandra gratefully took the cup making her way beside me. Miller winked in my direction. I rolled my eyes taking a seat beside Alexandra. "Now tell us why you called us all here for lunch? Some of us could have been getting laid." That asshole nodded in my direction. I quickly picked up a pillow, hurling it at his face with all my force.

I flashed Alexandra a grateful smile before turning back to listen to Bellamy. At least she came. That must mean she trusts me. She's giving me a chance to prove that we're not all assholes. "We're here to celebrate a lot of things. We're celebrating that we're all together. We're celebrating that we're all alive. We're celebrating that Bishop is gone and we can move on." We all let out a few cheers, raising our cups in the air with excitement. "We're also celebrating new beginnings. New relationships. New opportunities. And new challenges." He nodded at me before looking down at Clarke.

I placed a hang on Alexandra's knee as I saw tears build up in her eyes. She gratefully smiled back at me. "Sorry Alexandra, but we may have lied. We're not actually married yet," Clarke laughed. Yet? Everyone exchanged confused looks until the realization hit us all simultaneously. They were engaged. Clarke held out her hand to reveal Abby's ring on her finger. The same ring that I'd seen Bellamy carrying when he'd bumped into me in the hallway. I smiled to myself at the idea that I was right. "We don't actually want a wedding, but Octavia may or may not have threatened to kill me if we didn't have one, so I guess that's what we'll spend all winter doing."

Chaos blew through the room as everyone stood up to hug them. I turned towards Alexandra my grip tightening around her knee. I was happy for Bellamy and Clarke, but this couldn't be easy for her. "I'm sorry."

She placed her hand on mine. "We're celebrating new beginnings." She raised her cup up, bumping it against mine before taking a sip. She cringed as she took a drink. "Wow, this is strong." We burst into laughter. I hadn't considered that this was probably her first time trying Monty's moonshine. I'm pretty sure there's no form of alcohol as strong as Monty's stash.

I stood up making my way towards Clarke. Once Emori got out of the way I stepped forward. Clarke held her arms open for a hug, but instead, I hit her in the shoulder. "I'm so mad at you." She was taken back by the abuse, but I quickly wrapped her in a hug. "If you would have lost your memory because of me then we would have never known that you two finally decided to get your act together." I pulled away smiling down at her. Clarke gratefully smiled up at me. She'd been through a lot, it's nice to see her finally letting herself be happy for once. "Not that you two weren't basically married before," I smirked.

"Just because we were co-leaders doesn't mean we were married." She rolled her eyes, scoffing at the idea. But realistically we'd all known they'd end up together. No matter how much Bellamy tried to push the idea away by sleeping with other girls, or how much Clarke tried to run away from the idea. It was predetermined.

"You two have definitely been an old married couple since we hit the ground," Monty laughed as he took a step beside me. "That's why Jasper called you guys mom and dad when you weren't around." Monty's voice fell lower as he reminisced the good times he'd shared with Jasper. It had taken him almost two years to even be able to say his name without crying. But he'd found closure with everything that had happened. He knew it was for the best.

I made my way back towards Alexandra taking a seat beside her. We weren't as different as she assumed we all were. We'd all been through a lot. Who had it worse wasn't important.

"I guess Octavia won the bet." Miller shrugged his shoulder staring over at Octavia before turning back and giving Clarke a hug. The memories of sitting around the campfire with the delinquents flashed through my head. Everyone was cuddled up in blankets drinking moonshine while Bellamy and Clarke were arguing about something in Bellamy's tent. We'd all decided they'd end up together, but it was just a matter of time. Those two were so stubborn they waited until the end of the world to decide they were meant to be together. Miller cleared his throat standing in front of Clarke. "But since not all parties are here I think we should just forget that even happened." He rubbed the back of his neck, hanging his head low.

Monty held up his cup in the air. "Even though Jasper isn't here I'm sure he'd be ecstatic. Let's make this toast out to Jasper. May we meet again." A single tear slipped down his cheek. The pain was clear in his voice. He'd give anything to have his best friend back. I knew the feeling.

"May we meet again." Everyone chanted in unison. A cloud of sadness overcoming the room.

"Seems like you've all been through a lot. You've lost a lot," Alexandra whispered beside me. She took another swig of her moonshine.

"Well, Alexandra I wouldn't even know where to start with how messed up our past is." We'd been through hell. We'd had a lot of losses. Most of the original hundred were gone. The small family of delinquents we had left were closer than ever, except for Glass. I can't stand her.

"Please. Call me Lexie. My family always called me Lexie." Her tone was vulnerable, but there was a soft smile on her face.

"Well, do you want to get out of here Lexie? I can tell you anything you want to know." She smiled at me eagerly standing up and grabbing my hand. The chaos continued in the room, but we quickly slipped out the door without anyone noticing. Once we made it into the hallway I guided her towards my room. Once we made it into my room without getting noticed I closed the door leaning my weight against it as I watched her take a seat on the edge of my unmade bed. "Sorry for the mess. Cleaning my room hasn't really been a top priority for me lately."

"You're head of engineering. I highly doubt you have the time," she laughed. She carefully pulled her legs beneath her as she settled into my bed. I pushed myself off the door making my way to the chair sitting in front of my messy desk, but before I could take a seat she tapped the spot beside her. I nodded taking a seat in front of her, folding one leg beneath me while letting the other dangle over the floor beside me.

"So, what do you want to know?" I awkwardly shifted my weight around until I settled into a comfortable position.

She shifted a little closer, turning her body towards me. "I want to know about you. Working through inventory I hear a lot of things." She probably thinks I'm crazy. Everyone else around here thinks I am. They think I've been crazy since Finn died. "From what I hear you're a legend. Always the one to save the day."

I let out a hysterical laugh. "That's what they say about me?" I shook my head trying to consider the idea, but it just felt too farfetched. "I find that very hard to believe."

"Why? You're the youngest and the best engineers on this ship." She let out a light laugh. "I've done some research on you too, Raven Reyes." She smirked at me and I felt my face heat up. This was so awkward, and I can't seem to understand why. We were just here to talk, so why was I getting the feeling that talking isn't the only thing that'd happen here. She placed her hand on mine.

"Well, yeah. I am the youngest and best engineer on this ship, but that's hardly something legendary." And I may have saved our asses a few times, but it's not like I did it alone. But I am the one who took us into space only minutes before Praimfaya. I'm also the one who created a kill switch for Clarke to pull in the City of Light. And I was the one who shut down the systems at Mount Weather. I guess I am pretty badass, but how would she have heard of any of that.

"I've heard a lot of stories. You _are_ legendary." She tilted her head to the side, her pale blue eyes burning right through me. "But being the legend that you are, you're a lot nicer than I'd expected."

"That's debatable," I laughed. If Miller had a say he'd say I was an asshole. But I was nice when I wanted to be.

"Why? I've seen you with other people. What makes me so different?" She hung her head lower, looking up at me through her long dark lashes.

"I guess we just have a lot in common. It just feels right." She shifted her legs around, moving slightly closer. I could feel the heat radiating from her body. "I feel like you can understand a side of me that no one else ever has." Without any further thought, I moved closer, our legs pressed against one another. She grabbed the back of my neck, laying her head back against the pillow. I felt hesitant as I hovered above her, all of my weight being held up on my knee between her legs and my hands on either side of her. She lied beneath me with her hair scattered around her face. "I've never." My voice broke, but I quickly cleared my throat trying again. "I've never..."

"Neither have I." Her muscles tensed beneath me for a second before she pulled me lower. Our lips inches away from each other. The electricity radiated between us as we stared into each other's eyes. "But I think it's time for a new beginning," she whispered.

And that's all it took for me to lean down, pressing my lips to hers. She pulled my hair out of its ponytail flinging the small piece of rubber that had kept my hair slicked back. Her hands ran through my hair as she deepened the kiss. I leaned down on my elbow, sliding my hand beneath her head. I wrapped my other hand around her waist pulling her closer. She immediately flipped me over pressing my back against my bed, her long dark hair dangling around my face. Our lips remained together with every movement, only occasionally pulling away when we took off our shirts.

Her hands slowly made their way from my sides to the button of my pants. Just as she began to pull at my waistband there was a crack of the radio breaking us apart. She sat on top of me with her legs straddled on either side of me. "Reyes, we need your help down in the greenhouse," Bellamy yelled across the radio.

Alexandra slowly began to take her weight off me, but I grabbed her leg holding it back down against my side. Running my hand up the back of her neck I pulled her back down to me. "They can wait another five minutes," I whispered into her ear. She leaned into my neck pressing kisses along my jawline.

"Reyes. Are you there? We need you." Bellamy's voice echoed through the room again. I threw my head back in frustration.

Alexandra leaned forward pressing a kiss to the corner of my jaw. "Your services are needed elsewhere." She pressed another kiss to my neck, this time sucking my skin in with the edges of her teeth. "You can find me in medical when you're done."

I rolled her over, holding myself above her with the palms of my hand. I leaned down a deep kiss on her lips. "We'll continue this when I get back." She laughed as I rolled off her slipping back into my shirt and quickly snatching the radio from my desk. I put my hair back into a tight ponytail before radioing Bellamy back. "On my way." I made my way towards the door, turning to look at Alexandra once more before leaving. She was in the corner of the room slipping back into her shirt and redoing her hair. "I think this celebration was way better than that lunch."

She walked towards me, her arm snaking around my waist as she made her way out the door. "Agreed," she winked as she made her way back up to medical.

I stood with my back against the door for a few seconds before leaving. I could kill Bellamy. He probably gets laid daily and here he is interrupting me right before I even had the chance to do anything. I haven't ever been with anyone except for Finn, Bellamy, and Wick. Maybe I need to pay Clarke a little visit before heading back to see Alexandra because honestly, I have no idea what I'm doing. But I guess she doesn't either. We could be clueless together. Breaking through new challenges together, new experiences. We'd hardly known each other, but there was just something about her that drew me to her. Maybe she's been what I've been waiting for.


	43. Chapter 43

**Privilege**

 **Bellamy:**

The feeling of the cool air wrapping my face into a tight embrace, the smell of pine filling the air, and the feeling of the warm sun tingling against my skin as I stepped out of the ship would never get old. The feeling of being back on Earth was priceless. It had been getting colder in the mornings lately, by noon the sun always found its prime. The evergreen trees surrounding our camp were lightly shedding leaves, just enough to give an idea of how long there was until winter. Judging by the increase in the moisture filling the air we'd only have three months. That's three months to get enough cabins made for over 1100 people. Three months to get enough food to last us through the entire winter. Three months to get everything together. I ran my fingers through my hair letting out a deep sigh. The weight of the world had fallen back on our shoulders.

Footsteps echoed through the ship walls, slowly making their way closer. "I've got trainees up there getting your stuff for your new cabin. They should be done with that within the hour," Miller announced as he made his way by my side. As much as I wanted to sit back in my new cabin with Clarke, I knew there were too many people relying on me to get things done. Especially Octavia. "What's wrong?"

"We have about three months to get everything together, but all we have so far is one cabin and only enough food to last us three weeks." I could see the hesitation on his face as he pressed his lips together, a wrinkle forming on his forehead. "This isn't enough."

"Maybe that's because we're wasting time trying to train new guards when we should be focusing on getting our living situation settled and getting enough food to last." Azuma stepped on the other side of Miller. He stood with courage beside Miller, his head held high and his shoulders.

"Octavia is the commander. Doesn't she need to make the decision?" Miller shifted his weight from one foot the other, a nervous tick he'd been dealing with since we'd been on the ground.

"Let me handle Octavia." Azuma scanned the area. There was a sea of people all lost in their work, busy with the task at hand. That's what we'd settle in, an endless cycle of work. But it was different now. We were different now. "Miller. Get Kane, Indra, Echo, and Harper to stop guard training. Construction labor will double, and it'll increase the number of cabins made." Miller nodded heading on towards the guard trainees.

"I'll get things settled with the greenhouse. We can't have our entire diet rely solely on meat. Monty said he'd gotten some seeds together to grow food. I'll see if I can get Raven to help while Monty's out." Azuma nodded once more before making his way towards a group of kids practicing their hunting techniques.

I made it halfway towards the greenhouse when I realized that something was missing. A part of me was missing. I scanned the camp. Miller, Murphy, Kane, Indra, Harper, Echo. Everyone was there except for Madi. I grabbed Murphy by his arm pulling him away from the group of kids working on some trees around him. "Where the hell is Madi?"

His eyes widened, panic hitting him like a wave of radiation. Frantically he turned around, his head spinning as he scanned the area. "I thought she was with you." His voice was shaking, all the muscles in his face tightening as he continued looking around camp.

"She went inside to get something a few minutes ago." A tall, skinny boy with tan skin and brown eyes stood up as he helped another boy set down a tree "She told me in case anyone asked." There was a fear in his voice, an obedient look on his face. This was one of Luke's friends.

I stepped in front of him, folding my arms in front of me, carefully watching him. He didn't move, even as I stepped chest to chest in front of him. "Why would she tell you?" He took a step back, the fear in his voice translating to his face. "Murphy was here, so why didn't she tell him?"

He cleared his throat, shaking his head as he squared his shoulders once again. "No, sir…I mean Bellamy…I mean sir. She just…"

"She just had to leave really quickly. You see Murphy was busy helping some people, so she just told him on her way out." Another boy stepped up beside him. A tall young man with dark brown hair and pale green eyes. Another one of his friends. "If you want we can go find her for you."

I narrowed my eyes down at him, but this kid was confident. He didn't fluster until Murphy took a step beside me cornering him up against the tree behind them. "When she gets back, send her my way." Both boys nodded, letting out heavy sighs as I turned around. Murphy followed by my side. "Keep an eye on them. And when Madi gets back make sure you find out where she's been." He nodded turning back towards the group of construction workers.

Dwelling on whether Madi was running around camp with Luke right now was going to be waste of time. If she was anything like Octavia or Clarke she'd be too stubborn to listen to me. That's a conversation for another time. Making sure our progress for growing crops this winter was more important. By the looks of it, our farmers were ready to get things going.

The integration of all the clans was almost unrecognizable. The only true distinction that could be made were the tattoos and Azgeda markings. Now we were one and none of that mattered. Previous Azgeda farmers worked with the former farm station residents to decide what crops were more likely to grow through winter and what conditions were needed to allow it to happen.

Normally Monty would call the shots for farming, but since he was temporarily impaired Raven could get things started. I pulled the radio from my waistband holding it tightly in my hand. "Reyes, we need your help down in the greenhouse." After a minute of silence from the other end of the radio continued. I tried again. "Reyes. Are you there? We need you." She'd slipped out of our lunch early today with Alexandra. Raven wasn't one to just jump the gun with just anyone. That too with Alexandra. Just seems unexpected considering everything that's happened.

But if Raven getting laid would make her less of an asshole then I guess it would be cool. "On my way." Raven's voice was spiteful, the venom dripping from the tone of her voice. Raven had spent way too many years mourning the death of Finn, she deserves to move on. Maybe a bitter, genius mechanic was Alexandra's type. Maybe Alexandra could save Raven from herself.

"You were looking for me?" I felt Madi's presence before I witnessed it. I tilted my head to the side catching a glimpse of her glossy pale eyes staring up at me through her dark brown lashes. I carefully watched her as she stood in front of me, her face filled with innocence. This was the same look Octavia used on me when she wanted me to be her horse for the millionth time. That same innocence broke me one too many times.

I swallowed the lump growing in my throat trying to maintain my cold exterior. But staring down at her soft, innocent face was slowly tearing me apart. "You can't just wander off without telling anyone, Madi."

"I'm sorry." She hung her head a little lower, looking down at her feet. She was tugging at my heartstrings.

I weakly pulled her into my chest, her warm cheeks left my body defenseless. "It's okay, Princess." I pressed a kiss to the top of her beanie, a soft laugh slipping from her lips. "Next time you want to leave tell one of us." She nodded in my arms, sending a wave of relief through my body. Disciplining Octavia when she was this age wasn't hard because my mom was always there to help. But I didn't have that luxury anymore. "I can't lose you too."

She pulled away, holding my hand tightly between her delicate fingers. "Just because I'm not around doesn't mean you're going to lose me." She pressed the palm of her hand into my chest, the heat from her fingers burning a hole through my chest. "I can take care of myself, but you'll always be the person I go to when I can't."

I lightly tugged on the edges of her beanie, fixing it for her. "Now why don't you tell me about your little friends?" She stared up at me, her eyes spread as wide as they could be. All the innocence in her face was now gone. "Did you meet them through your _friend_ Luke?" I dragged out the word friend, emphasizing that he'd only be a friend.

Her eyes temporarily fell to the floor before she let out a deep sigh. "Why do you do that?" There was a specific ring in her voice. Her eyebrows drew together, and her nostrils flared. She looked like Clarke in her earlier days on Earth, a true Princess. "Don't act like Clarke didn't tell me about all your _special_ friends."

I heard a laugh from behind me. Turning around I saw Raven standing with her arms wrapped around her stomach. "That's my girl." She stepped forward holding her hand out for Madi to take. Madi took it allowing Raven to wrap her in her arms. "Your dad here has quite the reputation."

I held her chin between my fingers. "That was a different time. I would take this over that, any day." Raven stood protectively behind Madi, her arm wrapped around her shoulders. "Besides, I only want the best for my little Princess."

"Oh, please. You want to scare those boys senseless, so they have no choice but to suck up to you," Raven scoffed. She rolled her eyes, raising an eyebrow as she stared up at me. "Don't listen to him Madi."

"All the kids at this camp are already scared senseless." Madi slipped out from Raven's arms, taking a few steps away from us. "You know how hard it was to make the few friends I have now. For them, you're all scary." She threw her hands up, placing them carefully on her temples. "They're good kids. If you're so concerned you'd shut up Asher or Glass and their group of bullies. Do you have any idea how hard it is to fulfill all these high expectations because of you? To deal with all the stupid comments every day." Her voice slowly broke, a vibration coming from the back of her throat as her lips began to quiver.

Raven tilted her head to the side, a sad look in her eyes as she watched Madi slowly break down before her eyes. Without hesitation, I stepped forward pulling Madi's delicate frame between my arms. Her body vibrated against my body as the tears flowed down her cheeks. Raven stepped forward pressing her hand against the back of Madi's head, a gesture of comfort clearly ineffective to the burst of emotions Madi had been feeling. "You're held to higher expectations because you are better than they are Madi. They expect more from you because you have something none of them have."

She pulled her head out of my chest, her puffy eyes looking up at me with a heavy weight of pain. I felt my heart clench, we'd been so caught up in our own emotions and feelings we hadn't once asked Madi how she'd felt about all of this. She'd never mentioned having a problem with any of it, so we assumed there was no problem to talk about. But the truth is she'd been holding it in the same way Clarke had done. "What? What could I possibly have that no one else has? What could make me so much better than anyone else?" The strain in her vocal chords as she spoke sent my stomach in knots.

I cupped her face between the palms of my hand, gently rubbing circles on her cheeks. "You have a family. They envy that you're not alone. They think you can constantly do better and be better because you have us to keep you going. Not everyone has that." The realization slowly took over her as she ducked her head back into my chest. I lightly rubbed her back, Raven weakly smiled at me as I held her in my arms. "Most of those kids lost their parents to Praimfaya. Not all of them had a Clarke to care for them."

"I know, but it's not fair," she mumbled against my chest. I lightly laughed at the thought. How could someone who had suffered so much still have so much hope?

"Well my little natblida, life on the ground isn't always fair," Clarke laughed. She sat in her wheelchair with her hands carefully placed in her lap. Madi quickly slipped out of my arms wrapping Clarke into a tight embrace. "I know it's not easy to be considered privileged, but sometimes you just need to prove that you're better than that." Her eyes shifted up to meet mine, a soft smile on her face as the memories of everyone attacking her the same way flashed before her eyes. They all hated her when we'd first landed for that exact reason, hell girls like Glass still hated her. It wasn't the fact that she was privileged that made them hate her, it was the fact that she had the strength to be the leader everyone else was too scared to be.

"They'll come around, but don't waste your time trying to fit in," I assured. She let out a deep sigh, all the muscles in her body relaxing. I cupped her cheek in the palm of my hand, my thumb running along the sides of her cheeks. "Blakes and Griffins are far from average."

Clarke cleared her throat, raising a questioning eyebrow at the both of us. "Why don't you take me to our new cabin and tell me all about what Glass and these other kids have been saying to you?" Madi ducked her head, lightly rubbing the back of her neck as she turned towards Clarke.

"Now, what did you call me down here for?" Raven turned towards me, her hands placed on her hips. The frustration was radiating from her body, the tension clear on her face.

"Oh, I'm sorry did I interrupt something?" Raven rubbed the back of her arm before whipping her hair over her shoulder and stalking off towards the group of greenhouse workers. I rushed quickly behind her, grabbing her by her elbow to pull her back. "Look, I don't care if you're hooking up with her. I just want you to be happy." The tension in her body was released as she pulled her arm from my hold.

"I don't know what it is. I don't know what it's going to be. I don't know if she makes me happy. I don't even know if I can ever be happy, but I don't want to make this a thing. So, please. Just don't." She let out a deep, her hands balling into two tight fists. "I want to move on. I want things to change, but I don't need crap from you too."

"Okay." She released her hands, another sigh slipping from her lips. "Just let me know if she hurts you and you need me to kick her ass." She rolled her eyes as she let out a deep belly laugh. There was a radiance to her face as her mood lightly shifted. "Monty is out so we need you to get things started with the greenhouse."

Without any hesitation, Raven continued towards the group of Wonkru farmers working on setting crops. "What crops are you trying to grow through this winter?"

"We can grow many fruits and vegetables. Mr. Green supplied us with seeds for melons, carrots, cucumbers, spinach, onions, and peaches." Chance Lovett one of the previous members of farm station approached me, a tablet in hand. "Azgeda used to dig holes to plant their crops. They covered those holes with some material, so they would survive the weather."

"Monty mentioned something like that. They're hoop houses covered in polythene." Raven walked closer to the field of dirt laid out in front of her, kneeling down and rubbing some dirt between her fingers. "I can put together some polythene covers. Send me your measurements and I can see what I can get together."

"I'll get you some guards to help you dig out your rows, so you can start growing crops as soon as possible." Everyone exchanged a few nods before heading back to their work. The sooner we get things going, the better. It'd be nice to eat something other than bread and meat. My taste buds crave the sensations from eating fresh fruits and well-seasoned grounder dishes. I turned towards the rest of camp, watching everyone work together. Azuma led a large group of hunters into the forest. Azuma was right, construction had nearly doubled in size. The increase in labor would increase the production and hopefully things would be ready in time.

I felt a warm hand on my shoulder, gently squeezing my muscle. "We've survived worse," Raven whispered before walking past me.

We had survived worse, but this was about much more than just surviving. This was about living. About rebuilding our empire, our legacy. Now we were going to be the ones that people would read about in history books one day.

 **Clarke:**

I never considered what it'd be like for Madi to join the rest of our people again. I never considered that she would go through what I had gone through when we'd first landed. That she would be targeted because she was considered privileged. But it would make her stronger. Earning everyone's respect would be better than everyone just giving it to her.

Madi silently led us down to our cabin, moving around people working all around the camp occasionally stopping to greet some Wonkru civilians. The cabin was larger than I had imagined. The wood was cut to perfection. Each tree was set perfectly on top of the others. Bellamy had done excessive research on the history of life before the first apocalypse, but seeing what he'd put together was beyond my expectations. The front door swung open, Miller's head peering out from behind the door with a large grin on his face. "Are you ready to see the new Griffin-Blake residence?" Before we could respond he stepped out of the doorway to allow Madi to push me through the door.

Madi guided my wheelchair through the front door revealing a large living area filled with various types of furniture. The smell of pine and cinnamon filled the air. The room was filled with flowers and paintings. Some of my own drawings were hung up on the walls. There was a colorful drawing hanging beside the fireplace, the drawing I had worked on and perfected every day while on the ground. It had grown to be my favorite drawing. It was our family. Bellamy, Madi, my mom, Octavia, Raven, Kane, Monty, Harper, Miller, Wells, Jasper, Finn, Lexa, Lincoln, and my dad. It was a drawing of all the people that'd changed me, changed my life, changed who I was. Bellamy knew how much this drawing had meant to me. He knew how hard I'd worked on it and that's why it hung proudly in our living room for everyone to see.

My stomach knot as I took in all the thought Bellamy had put into making our home really feel like a home. There was a small fireplace on the other end of our living room. The kitchen was still empty, but each room had a bed. Madi's room had a small window across from the door. There were a few drawings pinned to the walls of her room. Some of Madi's favorite drawings. There was a charcoal drawing of the moon drowning in a sea of stars all scattered gracefully across the paper. Another drawing of the field of flowers, various shades of color scattered across the page. I'd drawn this one when Madi found more colored pencils in one of Becca's bunkers. Madi also adored a black and white charcoal drawing of Bellamy, Madi, and I. The resemblance was uncanny. Madi's bright eyes matched mine, but the freckles across her olive toned skin equaled Bellamy's along with her long dark hair. She said it always reminded her of what she'd lost after Praimfaya, but also what she'd gained.

"Why do we have three rooms?" I tilted my head to the side, looking over my shoulder at Miller who was closely watching me as I looked at a spare room with a small window and a few flowers laid out on the bed.

"You know, just in case you might need it someday." I quickly spun my wheelchair around to look up at him, but he just stood with a smirk on his face and his arms folded across his chest. "Don't get ahead of yourself. This spare room is so Bellamy won't be homeless if you ever fight again." I rolled my eyes making my way towards the third door at the end of a long hall, a safe distance from Madi's room. "Let me do the honors," Miller laughed as he made his way around me, standing in front of the door. "This is your new bedroom."

He swung the door open revealing a large room, with a larger bed. The room was filled with flowers. The various colors of the flowers were accented from the light shining through a large window beside our bed with a view of a long line of trees and a large lake. At each end of the window were long cloths to drape over the window if we ever needed the privacy. Two pictures hung side by side across from our bed. One was a charcoal drawing of Bellamy capturing his profile as he stared up at the stars. The stars in the sky contrasted with the stars scattered across his cheeks. Beside my drawing of him was a drawing of me lying against a tree. "Who drew this?" I couldn't take my eyes off it. This drawing was a precise image of my profile, my long blonde hair dangling around one side of my face as I rested my head back against the tree staring up at the sky. I

"I did." Bellamy's deep voice vibrated through the room, but I couldn't pull my attention from the drawing hanging in front of me. "This was from that night you'd saved me from Dax." I quickly turned my head towards him, his body leaning against the doorframe. Miller and Madi were both gone leaving Bellamy and me alone in our new home. "When I thought you were dead I just…I don't know I guess I wanted to save a part of you. I got really drunk one night and I couldn't get the image of you out of my head. This was the first time I'd felt like someone cared for me. The first time I felt like I wasn't alone. You changed my life that night." My heart throbbed in my throat as I tried to swallow the lump urging my tears to break through the barriers holding them in my eyes. "It's not nearly as good as yours, but it's all I had."

I cleared my throat, finding the strength to say something. "How did you bring it with you when you were taken from the Ark?" Bellamy hadn't said much about what it'd been like when he was on the Ark. He hadn't mentioned how hard it'd been on him. I never bothered to ask either. I guess I knew he'd tell me when he was ready.

"After I drew this picture I folded it and kept it in my pocket." He tapped the hidden pocket placed on the inside of his jacket, the pocket placed directly above his heart. "Just like your radio kept you sane, that picture kept me sane. Especially when we were stuck on the prisoner ship."

I held my hand out, a tear slipping down my cheek. Bellamy's fingers quickly running along the path of my tear to wipe it away. "It's beautiful." I gestured towards the rest of the house. "It's all beautiful." He leaned down pressing a kiss to my temple. "I didn't take you for the type to decorate your cabin so aesthetically."

"The old me wouldn't, but things have changed." He massaged the back of my neck with the tips of his fingers, gently trailing soft circles up around the base. He leaned down pressing a kiss to the back of my neck. I felt a chill go down my spine. "Now I have a beautiful fiancé," he whispered in my ear, his lips skimming the tip of my ear.

I tilted my head back against his hand, leaving the nape of my neck vulnerable to his lips. "Bellamy," I whispered. His fingers continued to run along the back of my neck, the warmth of his fingers tingling against my skin. He pressed another kiss to the crook of my neck, his lips hooking against my skin, my pulse throbbing against his lips. "Please." I reached my hands up to grab his head, but he quickly stopped me tightly holding my hands in the palms of his hands.

"Please, what?" He breathed against my ear, his soft wet lips running along the back of my ear. Another shock went through my body, goosebumps scattering across my body. He sloppily kissed my neck again, right along the line of my pulse. His teeth skimmed the skin of my neck. "Tell me."

My breathing grew heavier as he continued up my neck. He released my hands allowing me to tug at the ends of his hair every time he sent electricity down my spine. "Bellamy," I breathed. There was no greater joy than the feeling of Bellamy's lips against my skin. It was like my own personal piece of heaven. The heat from his lips sent my body into a burning sensation of pleasure.

He made his way around my wheelchair, his hand cradling the back of my head in the palm of my hand as he pulled my face closer to his. The distance was far enough to where I felt my body aching for his lips on mine but close enough to where I could feel his face in front of mine without having to open my eyes. His fingers lightly rubbed at my scalp as he slightly brought his cheek beside mine. His lips skimmed the end of my ear once more. "Madi's staying with Octavia tonight. So, we'll have all night for you to scream my name as loud as you want." My eyes stung as they shot open. Bellamy leaned back, his face hovering in front of me. His tongue lightly caressed his bottom lip as he stared down at me, a tight smirk on his face. "You should rest up until then, Princess," he winked.

Just as he began to stand back up, I reached up to grab him. Taking his long dark curls in the palms of my hands, I pulled his face into mine. His hand shot back to cradle mine, as his other hand grabbed me by my waist. He gracefully picked me up out of my wheelchair and carried me to our bed. Our lips were magnetically attached, not once detaching as he lied me down. I wrapped one leg around his hips as my hands dropped from his hair to the waistband of his, lightly tugging on the edges.

He immediately pulled away, his eyes darting to the window shining light into our room. He leaned up on his knee between my legs, his hand carefully holding up my thighs as I laid beneath him. Leaning down he pressed another kiss to my lips. This one was chaste, too quick for me to reel him back in. He cupped my cheek in the palm of his hand, a tight smirk on his face. "Easy, Princess." I let out a loud groan, throwing my head back in frustration. He slowly ran his hands down my thighs, feeling each goose bump as he landed his hands on the edges of my hips. "Rest. You need rest."

I propped myself up on my elbows beneath him, leaning my face closer to his. "No. I _need_ you." He let out a heavy chuckle, the corners of his eyes wrinkling as he stared down at me.

He leaned down once more, one of his hands falling beside my face as he held himself up. "You'll have me. All night," he whispered as he pressed another kiss to the soft spot behind my ear. He quickly stood up grabbing some extra pillows out of a drawer at the other end of the room. He carefully lifted my leg in the air to slide some pillows beneath it. "I can't hold your legs up forever," he laughed. I rolled my eyes tilting my head to the side to glare down at him as he covered me with a blanket. Without another word he quickly left the room, closing the door behind him.

Throwing my head back I let out a deep sigh. Why? Why did he have this annoying control over me? The ability to make my knees weak within seconds. Everyone else in this damn camp is scared to death of me, and all it takes to weaken me is Bellamy Blake. I let out a loud huff as I relaxed my body. At least we'd have our cabin to ourselves all night while the rest of Wonkru sleeps inside the ship, but I'll be damned if he tries to cut me off again.


End file.
